“Would you like me to make him quiet?” said the flaming Spirit-an angel, as I now understood.
“Of course I would,” said the Ghost.
“Then I will kill him,” said the Angel, taking a step forward.
“Oh-ah-look out! You’re burning me. Keep away,” said the Ghost, retreating.
“Don’t you want him killed?”
Each time the ghost is asked by the angel, “May I kill it?” the ghost finds one rationalization after another to avoid what he perceives to be a painful operation. The angel informs him there is only one way to rid him of the lizard and that is to kill it. The ghost assures the angel that he will come back another day when he is feeling better.
“There is no other day. All days are present now.”
“Get back! You’re burning me. How can I tell you to kill it? You’d kill me if you did.”
“It is not so.”
“Why, you’re hurting me now.”
“I never said it wouldn’t hurt you. I said it wouldn’t kill you.”
“Oh, I know. You think I’m a coward. But it isn’t that. Really it isn’t. I say! Let me run back by tonight’s bus and get an opinion from my own doctor. I’ll come again the first moment I can.”
“This moment contains all moments.”
“Why are you torturing me? You are jeering at me. How can I let you tear me to pieces? If you wanted to help me, why didn’t you kill the damned thing without asking me–before I knew? It would be all over by now if you had.”
“I cannot kill it against your will. It is impossible. Have I your permission?”
Here the lizard increases his efforts to convince the ghost that he should leave immediately and have nothing more to do with this terrible thing.
“Have I your permission?” said the Angel to the Ghost.
“I know it will kill me.”
“It won’t. But supposing it did?”
“You’re right. It would be better to be dead than to live with this creature.”
“Then I may?”
“Damn and blast you! Go on can’t you? Get it over. Do what you like,” bellowed the Ghost: but ended, whimpering, “God help me. God help me.”
The ghost finally assents and the angel quickly steps forward and in an instant crushes the lizard and throws it to the ground. Moments later the ghost is transformed into a being of light.
The painful operation of removing the lizard of vice from our shoulders can seem overwhelming and beyond our capacity, but we have a choice. We can either remain mired in endless purposeless pain or we can give our ascent to begin a life changing transformation; to become new and as bright as the sun; to finally possess the strength to leap upon the great stallion’s back and race across the brilliant fields of green to our heavenly home.
This requires a strong purpose and the courage to exercise our wills to change. General Patton once said, “Fatigue makes cowards of us all. Men in condition do not tire.” This means that overcoming pain and fatigue requires some action on our part. It will require training and preparation to endure and not to give up. “But that is for brave men and women and I am not brave,” you might be tempted to say. Patton has a response, “If we take the generally accepted definition of bravery as a quality which knows not fear, I have never seen a brave man. All men are frightened. The more intelligent they are, the more they are frightened. The courageous man is the man who forces himself, in spite of his fear, to carry on...Courage is fear holding out a minute longer.” (General George S. Patton, Jr., War As I Knew It, 1947). Another way of describing “the man who forces himself” is “the man who wills himself” to do what is right in spite of any criticism or adversity, including fear.
Practicing virtue in small ways strengthens and conditions your will to respond well when you are faced with real crises in your life. A story in the old Boy Scout book, The Practice of the Oath and Law, describes two brothers who go to war together. One of the brothers is severely wounded during a battle and the other, upon returning from the field, learns that his younger brother did not make it back to camp and is still laying somewhere out on the battlefield. He asks permission of his commanding officer to go out and bring his younger brother back but his request is denied. “The officer tells him, ‘Your brother is probably dead and there is no point in you risking your life to bring in his body.’ But the older brother is relentless and continues his pleading until the officer finally consents. Just as the older brother finally reaches the camp, carrying his severely wounded brother across his shoulders, the younger brother dies. ‘There, you see,’ said the officer, ‘You risked your life for nothing.’ ‘No,’ replied Tom, ‘I did what he expected of me and I have my reward. When I crept up to him and took him in my arms, he said, ‘Tom, I knew you would come.’
There is a touching song that parallels the story of Tom and his brother, written by Edward Madden, called Two Little Boys. The best recording of the tune was performed as a 90th Anniversary Tribute to the ending of World War I by Rolf Harris and the Froncysyllte Male Voice Choir. The use of trumpets and the powerful men’s voices convey the camaraderie, loyalty and brotherhood found among soldiers in every war. It was composed sometime after the end of the American Civil War and recounts the unbreakable bond of friendship and love that two little boys share all of their lives. The song captures the essence of Tom’s willingness to sacrifice his life for his brother in a way that words alone might not be able to convey.
TWO LITTLE BOYS
(Original Lyrics)
Two little boys
Had two little toys,
Each was a wooden horse;
Gaily they’d play
Each summer’s day—
Warriors both of course.
One little chap
Then had a mishap,
Broke off his horse’s head;
Wept for his toy,
Then cried with joy
As his young comrade said:
“Did you think I would leave you crying
When there’s room on my horse for you?
Climb up here, Joe, and don’t be sighing;
He can go just as fast with two.
When we grow up we’ll both be soldiers,
And our horses will not be toys;
Then I wonder if you’ll remember
When we were two little boys.”
Long years passed,
The war came at last;
Gaily they marched away.
Cannon roar’d loud
Midst the mad crowd
Wounded and dying Jack lay.
Loud rings a cry—
A horse dashes by,
From out the ranks of blue,
Gallops away
To where Jack lay
As a voice comes strong and true:
“Did you think I would leave you dying
When there’s room on my horse for you?
Climb up here Jack, we’ll soon be flying
To the ranks of the boys in blue.
Did you say, Jack, I’m all a-tremble,
Well perhaps it’s the battle’s noise;
Or it may be that I remember
When we were two little boys.”
“There you have the gist of it all; somebody expects something fine and noble and unselfish of us; someone expects us to be faithful.” (The Practice of the Oath and Law) Who in your life expects you to be faithful and virtuous? Is your purpose clear and strong? Can you take the pain and discomfort required of you? Don’t stop to count the cost or to ask whether the sacrifice required to do the right thing is worth doing. It is, and it always will be. A life of virtue will prepare you to ask, “Did you think I would leave you dying?” And those who know you well, will melt your heart with their confident reply, “I knew you would come.”
In your search for a purpose strong enough to endure all suffering, the Act of Contrition has an insight that may be helpful to you. It is a prayer asking for God’s forgiveness for the things you have do
ne wrong and the things that you have failed to do. In it you say, “O my God, I am heartily sorry for having offended Thee and I detest all my sins because of Thy just punishment but most of all because I have offended Thee my God who are all good and deserving of all of my love. I firmly resolve, with the help of thy grace, to sin no more and to avoid the near occasion of sin.” It is a simple and beautiful prayer. Note that there are two reasons for being sorry. The first is the lower argument: you fear God’s just punishment, the pains of hell. The second is the higher argument: you are truly sorry because God is deserving of all your love, you want to do the right thing no matter how difficult it may be because you love Him. Ask yourself, “Is fear of discomfort my primary motivation, my purpose, or is it something higher?”
If properly directed, sport provides the perfect environment for cultivating and strengthening our ability to sacrifice and live virtuous lives. Brian’s Song, the true life story about the relationship and personal struggles of Chicago Bears’ running backs Gayle Sayers and Brian Piccolo, reveals the way sport can transform boys into men of virtue. The problems that we attribute to sport are not about sport. Sport provides an artificial environment that is neither good nor bad. In reality it is the athletes, coaches, referees, organizers, parents, and fans who participate in it that make it one way or the other.
TAKE AWAY
Pain without a purpose is intolerable to human beings. The greater the purpose, the greater the sacrifice you will be able to make and the more readily you will be able to accept the tribulations that come your way. Preparing yourself mentally, physically and spiritually through each grace filled and virtuous act of your life is the only way to become strong enough to endure and accept the pain and sacrifice that is asked of you each day. Consider the lesson of Two Little Boys. Practicing virtue in the nursery led to generosity, loyalty, friendship, love, courage and joy on the battlefield, when lives hung in the balance. What is your ultimate purpose? The stronger it is, the more pain and discomfort you can take, the greater your ability and desire to sacrifice. And ultimately the happier you’ll be.
CHAPTER 10
LESS THAN A MINUTE TO GO
TIME. It is the only thing that we can’t get back. There never seems to be enough of it. We are always looking for more of it. Maybe that’s why the last few seconds of a close game are so riveting. Everything seems to be on the line and we are not sure how it is going to end.
What if you were just told that you only had ten minutes to live? Would life be different for you? What would you do? Who would you talk to? Like Scrooge, in Charles Dickens’ A Christmas Carol, your life would seem to flash before your eyes. Certainly your life, with the few minutes that remained, would be different than it is now. If so, an important question to ask would be, “How do I know that I will not die in the next ten minutes?” The answer is pretty obvious: You don’t know. If you agree that your life would be different if you were going to die in the next few minutes, why are you not living that way right now? It is because you don’t believe that you will die in the next ten minutes and therefore there is no need to change now. Given the eternal consequences, that’s a pretty big gamble.
Blaise Pascal, a seventeenth-century mathematician, took this idea a little further when he posited what has come to be known as “Pascal’s Wager.” He challenged those individuals who were living without any conviction or belief to consider their end. The Wager was not a proof for the existence of God but it was a clever way of getting people who had no belief to reconsider their position.
The Wager begins by showing that you have been born and there is no way to stop the process of aging and dying. Therefore, to believe or not to believe is like making a wager. You might ask, “What if I choose not to place a bet?” Too late, the clock is running. Your life is finite, it is going to end at some point. You are placing a bet whether you know it or not. Your action or lack thereof will determine which one you made. Paschal described the four possible outcomes and then challenged his readers to decide which one they should place their bet on. The first possibility was to wager for the existence of God and then at the end of your life discover that he does indeed exist. This would result in your infinite happiness. The second possibility was to wager for the existence of God but then in the end discover that he does not exist. Nothing lost by having lived a good life. The third possibility was to wager against the existence of God and then in the end discover that he really does exist. This results in the worst possible outcome, infinite loss. The fourth and final possibility was to wager against the existence of God and then discover at the end of your life that he did not exist. Nothing gained. Since the first wager is the best one to make because it leads to infinite happiness, Paschal concludes that his readers should begin considering who is God and what is their relationship with Him.
Whether you live ten or ten million minutes more, your entire happiness in life depends on love. Why? The simple answer is, “Because God made you that way.” If you are happy it is because you love someone and they love you. Nothing will ever be more important to you in life. Sure we all get distracted or sometimes think the pursuit of money, power, fame or pleasure is most important but in the end we all know the truth. St. Augustine captured it in these beautiful words, “Our hearts are restless until they rest in You.” Our strongest purpose in life is love. And God is love.
Consider the basis of any person’s relationship. If you are a young man, image having just turned twenty-one years of age and a group of your friends invite you to a special birthday dinner at your favorite restaurant. During the course of the evening you begin speaking with Dave, a friend of a friend that you have just met for the first time. He begins to tell you about this woman, Rebecca MacIntyre, who he met while on a trip in Alaska. At first you are not interested in hearing about Alaska or Rebecca the tour guide, but he goes on for what seems like an hour raving about her beauty, intelligence and soul. Your interest is piqued but you eventually drift back into conversation with your friends until the wonderful evening comes to an end.
On your way home you begin to think about Rebecca in Alaska. When you arrive back in your apartment, a strange thought pops into your head, “I wonder if she can be as good as Dave described?” An even stranger urge comes over you to call her. You begin calling information and finally come across a phone number that might just be hers. You take a deep breath and beginning dialing the number. After three or four rings, a lovely voice answers, “Hello.” You fumble around for a moment before explaining, “You see it is my Birthday and… I met Dave… who told me all about you and his tour of Alaska and… I just had to call because you sounded too good to be true.” There is silence on the other end of the line until finally she says, “Well, happy birthday!”
The two of you begin talking and before you know it three hours have passed. Rebecca and you have connected in a way that had never happened for either of you. Almost as one, you both excitedly agree to meet in Calgary, half way between New York and Anchorage. When you finally meet face-to-face it surpasses all expectations. By the end of the week, you both decide that you want to spend more time together. It turns out Rebecca has a cousin in New York that she can stay with and the Cruise line she works for has an office downtown.
When Rebecca arrives in New York, you pick her up at the airport and begin driving her to where she will be staying with her cousin. When Rebecca tells you the address you sit there dumbfounded. The address is four houses down from where you grew up. It turns out that it is the house Rebecca lived in before her family moved to Anchorage. She even went to the same school that you did! Weeks and months go by with dates and calls and before long there is a wedding. Year after year, your love for each other grows ever deeper with each selfless act and shared experience. Rebecca is no longer a name in Alaska. Rebecca has become someone you would die for.
Your relationship with God is much the same. For those that say, “I don’t think much about God. I just don’t have any emotion or strong f
eeling about Him.” Rebecca was just a name in Alaska until you met her, dated her, married her, and continued to sacrificed for her. All of that led you to think about her all the time and built a strong love and emotional tie with her. The question to ask yourself, “Is God a name in Alaska or someone I would die for?” It may be the former now, but if you are willing to take the chance and make the first call it might not be too long before its the latter.
The good news is that we don’t have to do it all on our own. God provides the grace and all we are asked to do is cooperate with it. The bad news is that sometimes we forget that and try to muscle our way through the situation or task. It is the difference between trying to lift weights on your own or having someone to spot you when you begin to fail, and having an expert strength and conditioning coach who designs a program especially for you and is there to help when the bar gets a little too heavy.
You may have experienced some tough and difficult times in your life and felt like you were abandoned, when in fact the grace was pouring down like Niagara Falls. You were standing under it with your umbrella up complaining that there was no grace for you and wondering why your weren’t getting wet. If you could have listened more closely you would have heard someone shouting, “Put down the umbrella!” Unlike Niagara Falls the grace available to us is infinite. We could be permanently wet with it if we would only stay focused. The umbrellas that we all have up are the things that distract us from what we were made to be, which is happy.
With that grace raining down, have you ever been so overwhelmed by gratitude that you didn’t know what to say or do because nothing seemed adequate to express your thankfulness? That is what happens when you put down your umbrella and let the grace pour down on you.
Take a minute or two and write down on a piece of paper all of the things in your life that are invaluable, meaning beyond worth. You wouldn’t trade them for all the money in the world. After about a minute most people have stopped writing. Let’s review your list. For example did you write down your brain stem? Or how about your left and right retinas? Or each of the nuclei contained in every cell of your body? Initially you probably had a look on your face that said, “What is he talking about?” But think about it. Can you live with cells that have no nucleus? No! Now reconsider your list. You probably wrote down big things like, my health, my family, and so on, without considering all of the invaluable things that make up each one. To make a proper list you would need an almost infinite number of pads and pencils to write down all of the things that could not be bought with all of the world’s treasure.
Less Than a Minute to Go Page 19