by Toni Aleo
Rick had already started walking away when Angie looked up to her and asked, “Do I have to go?”
Lucy’s heart just broke.
“Yeah, baby, I’m sorry,” she said, her voice cracking as she hugged her tightly.
“But what if he won’t bring me?”
“Then call me. I’ll come get you.”
“But what if he won’t let me? Just take me home now.”
“Honey, I can’t. It’s his weekend. It’s fine. I’ll see you in the morning.”
Angie only nodded as Rick called, “Come on. Now.”
Looking up at her, Angie pleaded with her eyes, but what was Lucy supposed to do?
She had to let her go.
Tapping gloves with his teammates as the Assassins gathered in the locker room, Benji went to his locker and sat down, a grin on his face. What a way to start the night. With a win. After kicking some Penguins’ ass where Tate got a shutout, Benji was feeling good. He hadn’t scored but he had four assists for the night, highest of his career. Which was freaking awesome. He was killing it, and he and Jayden were clicking better on the ice. Things were good.
Next stop, late dinner with his girlfriend and then a long night of sex.
Yes, Benji was a happy man.
“Great game, Paxton,” Sinclair said, tapping his glove as he sat.
Benji nodded, feeling on top of the world as he threw his gloves to the glove collector to dry them. “Thanks, man. Great game.”
Sinclair grinned as he leaned back, sucking in a long breath as Coach came in to do his end of game speech. When he singled out Benji, he beamed, feeling real good. He listened intently as Coach stressed how they needed to play like they had tonight for the next two weeks on the road trip. They were facing some tough competition during the road trip, but Benji had no worries. They were going to kick some ass.
But first, he was going to spend the weekend with Lucy. Man, he couldn’t wait to see her. He was pretty sure he played so well because he knew she was there. Watching him. He still owed her a goal, but he had done well tonight. Hopefully, she enjoyed herself. When Coach clapped his hands, they all joined in as he walked out, fist-pumping in unison with them. Leaning back, Benji was all smiles as he exhaled a breath, reaching for his phone to text Lucy that he’d be out soon.
Peering over at him from his locker, Jayden asked, “Hey, bro, where we going to eat?”
But Benji wasn’t listening. No, his shoulders had slumped as he read a text from Lucy.
Lucy: I’m so sorry. I won’t be at the game and I’m really not in the mood for dinner. Text me when you are on your way home and, if you want, I’ll come over. I really would like to come over. I got into it with Rick.
“I guess nowhere,” he said and Jayden’s face twisted.
“I thought we were going out?”
“Yeah, I guess Lucy and Rick got into it. She doesn’t want to go out. Wasn’t even here tonight.”
Jayden’s face changed to concern. “Is she okay?”
Benji shrugged as he hit Lucy’s name to call her. “Not sure.”
Jayden let out a long breath, falling back into his locker. “I hate that dude.”
“Hey,” she answered and he leaned on his legs. “Sorry I’m not there.”
“No worries, are you okay?”
She hesitated for a second, and he could hear the pain in her voice as she said, “Not really. I’ve eaten four boxes of Girl Scout cookies I had hidden away, but they aren’t helping.”
“Okay, I’m leaving in about thirty. Want to meet me at the house?”
“Yeah, I would really like that.”
“Okay, I’ll see you soon.”
“I’m really sorry, Benji.”
“Don’t be. It’s fine,” he said and he wasn’t lying. So she didn’t come and they wouldn’t go to dinner. That was all trivial to the fact that she was upset. “Is Angie okay?”
Her voice broke and it gutted him as she whispered, “I think so.”
His stomach ached with uneasiness. “See you soon.”
“Okay,” she said as he hung up and then started getting undressed so he could shower.
“Well?”
“I don’t know details, but she sounds crushed. I’m meeting her at my house.”
Jayden nodded. “Well, let me know if we’re going to go on a manhunt.”
Benji nodded because, if he had his way, that’s exactly what he’d want to do. He just wanted the dude gone, but he was sure that wouldn’t happen. Throwing down his girdle, he reached for his towel and said, “Will do.”
After getting dressed and saying good-bye to the guys, Benji headed to his house, anxiety eating him alive. He had no clue what was going on, but this was the first time he had heard Lucy that upset. She sounded helpless, distraught, and that wouldn’t fly with him. He was really getting tired of Rick, and something needed to change. Like he needed to disappear or something. He was going to have to sit down with the guy. Or beat his face in. One of the two. He prayed it wouldn’t come to the latter. He wanted to handle this like adults. The only thing that mattered was Angie.
Getting to his house, he found that Lucy was already there. Parking beside her car, he got out, locking his doors, and headed through the back door into the kitchen. The downstairs was dark, and that worried him.
“Lucy?”
“Upstairs,” she called as he walked past her shoes and noticed her coat lying over the counter. Reaching for it, he took it to the coat closet and hung it up before heading upstairs. Taking the stairs two at a time, he got to the top quickly. When he looked down the hall to find Lucy lying on his bed on her belly with her face toward him, his stomach dropped.
She had been crying.
“Aw, you’re not naked,” he called teasingly, hoping like hell he could make her smile as he walked toward her.
She shrugged, not returning his smile, not that he expected her to. Still, his heart remained in his stomach. “Sorry.”
Pursing his lips, he toed out of his shoes and climbed over her, taking her in his arms and cuddling her close. She wrapped her arms around his torso, nuzzling her nose into his chest, clinging to him. “What happened?”
Shaking her head, she sucked in a deep breath, filling her lungs before letting it out slowly. Closing his eyes, he listened as she told him what happened at the rink, what Rick had said, and how Angie had looked at her. He listened, he did, but it was hard when her voice broke and her tears soaked his tee. All he saw was red. All he wanted to do was rip Rick limb from limb. How dare he? How could he be so heartless to Angie? Hockey was important to her, and he didn’t care? What kind of man doesn’t care what makes his daughter happy? Benji would kill for the chance to make Leary happy again. And this man—no, this scum—was wasting this precious chance of loving a piece of himself?
It was sickening.
But what was more stomach-turning was listening to Lucy cry for her daughter.
“I didn’t want to let her go, Benji. I didn’t, but it’s legal, you know? I can’t say she can’t go. No matter if I think she doesn’t want to go. I’m not even sure if she has to go. I just don’t know,” she cried, clinging to him, and he held her close, dusting kisses along her temple. “I don’t know what to do, and I don’t know how to fix it. I don’t understand why he is being like this. Is it you? Is it because I’m finally moving on? Or is it because he’s just a jackass and he doesn’t like that Angie is more vocal now? Telling me when she is not happy with him. I just don’t know. He wants her to know to respect him.”
“What a douche.” It could be any of those reasons, and that was just sad. Angie was a great kid. Very respectful. Honest. Sweet. Wacky. The dude was worthless, and Benji hated that for both of them. “Lucy, I’m sorry. I’m completely speechless. He’s such a dick.”
“He is,” she agreed, nuzzling her nose to his. When she opened her eyes, they were full of pain, watery, and just so damn sad it hit him straight in the gut. “What do I do?”
He could only shake his head. He had no clue. “Have you called your dad? Isn’t he your lawyer?”
She looked away, her shoulders falling. “Not yet. I will tomorrow. I was too upset to speak to him tonight, and I just hate talking to him. I don’t want to need him. Maybe I should find another lawyer?”
“Yeah, and I understand, but your dad knows the case. He’s been there since the beginning, right?” She nodded, her eyes welling up with tears. “Then maybe you should stick with him. He’ll fight for Angie because, surely, he loves her.”
She leaned her head to his chin, and he just wanted to make her feel better. His heart was jackhammering in his chest, and he was unsure of what to do. He wanted to make the pain go away. He wanted her to smile. But how? What could he do?
“You’re right, but it’s just… I don’t want to put Angie through all this. I don’t think it’s fair to her. She’s at the age now where she knows what’s going on. She knows when I’m sad, when I fight with him. And dragging him into court is going to put the spotlight on her. I just don’t want to hurt her, but I also can’t fail her.”
He nodded as she sat up, crossing her legs and running her hand down her face. Moving his hand into hers, he laced their fingers. “But what is best for Angie?”
Her lip trembled as she shook her head. “I don’t know. I want it to be easy. I want him to be a good man and love his daughter. I pray all the time that he’ll change, but he won’t. And I don’t know if I’m hurting her more by leaving her there with him or taking her away. But the look in her eyes, Benji, it was like having the air knocked out of me.”
“Does she want to go there?”
“I don’t know. Some days I think so, but then some, I don’t. Tonight, she most definitely did not want to go, but that’s ’cause he was so iffy about hockey tomorrow, I’m sure.” Running his hands through his hair, he met her worried gaze. “Am I jumping the gun? Am I freaking out for nothing? Maybe he was just being a dick, but tomorrow will be fine?” She was hopeful, but he was pretty sure the dude was a dick twenty-four seven.
“I don’t know, babe.”
She made a sound of frustration as she covered her face with her hands. “I just wish I’d never met him. No, I don’t regret Angie, but damn him, I regret him. More than anything.”
Now is not the time to ask. It isn’t. Don’t ask. Do not ask.
“Can you tell me what happened between you two, baby?” he asked and he cringed. Apparently, he didn’t know how to talk himself out of stuff. She looked up and his eyes held hers. “’Cause I really don’t understand how someone can treat their child and their child’s mother like this. I cannot imagine.”
“Because you’re a decent guy, Benji. Not everyone is cut from the same cloth as you.”
“I understand that, but if Ava and Leary were alive, and our situation was like yours, I would do right by them. I would be a man about it.”
She looked down, moving her fingers along the back of his hand. “I know that, which is why I think you’re really amazing.”
“Well, thanks.” As he watched her, she continued to trace the back of his hand, her lips moving but no words leaving her mouth. Her neck was turning red, her face flushed from her tears as she struggled with what she wanted to say. It was painful to watch, and finally, he said, “Do you not want to talk about it?”
“Not really.”
“Okay.”
His voice was rough, unsure what to say next. He wanted to know. He wanted to know that part of her not only so he would understand Rick, if there was a way to understand him, but because that was the last part of her he didn’t know. He wanted to know everything about her. He wanted her to be open with him, to fully trust him.
He wanted to find a way to help.
“But I should,” she whispered, leaning into his hand. “Because you deserve to know.”
He looked up then as a tear rolled down her cheek. “I don’t want you to tell me if you don’t want to.”
“No, I do,” she said softly, another tear sliding down her cheek. “I just hate talking about him. About what he did to me and Angie. I hate strolling down memory lane when it comes to Rick.”
He could tell, so bringing the back of her hand to his lips, he kissed it softly before saying, “Don’t worry about it, then.”
He wanted to know, but he refused to put her under any more stress than needed. Being Lucy, though, headstrong and stubborn, she shook her head and swallowed hard. He watched her as she sat for a moment, breathing in and out. When she looked up, a haunted expression swirled in those deep green eyes.
And Benji knew he was in for a doozy.
She cleared her throat, and Benji watched as she struggled with the words, his heart pounding in his chest.
“I met Rick in high school,” she said then, exhaling his name, but not in a good way. Almost in a disgusted way. Like his name was just the nastiest thing she could have had in her mouth. “He was the bad boy from the trailer park who wanted to do bad things. With me. I was eighteen, straight A’s, captain of the softball team, and I was going to go to law school like my daddy did. Problem was, I was also going through that rebel phase since my dad told me to keep my head in the game, not to veer off course ’cause I had law school to worry about. I didn’t want to keep my head in the game, though. I wanted to have fun because, for the last four years, I had done what I was told and everything that was expected of me. Enter Rick. He had a motorcycle that, looking back, I’m sure wasn’t safe, but I loved riding on the back of that thing. Pissed my parents off, but I was having fun.”
A small smile pulled at her lips. “I was a relationship girl, didn’t have sex until I was with the guy for a while. But Rick, he had me in the back of my car by day two. He just had a way about him. We had sex every chance we got. Young, stupid, kid sex that led to Angie. I freaked because I was supposed to go to law school and I had plans, but Rick promised we’d be good. That I had changed him, that he’d marry me as soon as he turned eighteen. He’d get a job and we’d be fine. Seemed like a sound plan, so I went home and I told my parents, and they lost their shit. They both hated Rick with everything inside of them. Told me he was using me because he was the poor kid and I was the rich kid. Told me to dump him and they would help me raise the baby so I could still try to live my dreams. I was such a brat and said no, that I loved him. But, really, I didn’t. I just didn’t want to seem like a failure.”
She exhaled, shaking her head. “We graduated and I was six months pregnant with Angie. We got married in a quick courthouse wedding that neither of my parents attended. Broke my heart. I stopped talking to them because of it. I moved in to his trailer with him and his mom. I think that’s when things when south, when I lost my confidence, lost all hope. Because, Lord, she was awful to me. I know you may find this hard to believe, but I was pretty snarky and sassy all the time, and she hated it,” she said with a grin and he smiled.
“You? Never.”
Her smile fell off as she looked down at their hands. “She told him that no woman should talk to her husband that way, that he needed to put me in my place. Blah, blah, blah. She even smacked me once. Right across my face because I told her I wasn’t cleaning up after all of them when they had a party the night before. I left when she did that. But of course, Rick talked me into coming back. Said our baby needed both of us ’cause he knew what it was like not to have a dad. But, in retrospect, I know that’s when shit got really bad.”
Looking up, she shook her head as she looked into his eyes. He was hanging on every word she was saying, unsure how someone as beautiful and strong could end up like that. “I was so stupid. I still can’t believe I stayed as long as I did. I tried to go to school, I did. But it didn’t work out ’cause Rick always had my car, going to ‘work,’ and I wouldn’t have a way to school. It was sad, and I let him ruin my dreams.
“My dad offered to take me back in, that he’d pay for my schooling, the whole nine if I divorced Rick and came home. I was so stubborn
that I wouldn’t accept it, saying I loved him. At that point, I really think I might have. I’m not sure. And then when I was in labor and I had Angie, I was in the room with my family. They were all loving on us because not only was it a new baby, but because they hadn’t seen me in months. A woman walked into the room—”
Her nose crinkled a bit as she shut her eyes, slowly shaking her head. “Heidi, it was Heidi who walked into the room. Rick was downstairs getting me something to eat—or really, hiding from my dad and brothers—and she walked in. She asked if I was Lucy Hart, Rick’s wife. I had noticed her a few times; she lived about nine trailers down from us. She was a few years younger than us, went to school with us, but I never paid her any mind. I was living in hell, why would I?” she added with a humorless laugh. “But I said, yeah, that’s me, and she goes, ‘My name is Heidi Slattery, and I’ve been sleeping with Rick for the last eight months. We’re pregnant.’ She opened her coat, and sure as shit, she was pregnant. Big and pregnant.”
“What the hell, Lucy? Really?” Benji said then and she rolled her eyes. “So Nina and Angie are—”
“Two months apart,” she said, shaking her head. “I wasn’t even shocked. I didn’t cry or anything, but my dad and mom freaked the fuck out. I mean, they were cussing, screaming, and my brothers, bless them, Jace had no clue what was going on, but Jayden and Jude did. They tried to fight Rick, but he left. Left me at the hospital.”
“He left you?”
“Yup, and his brand-new baby. My dad convinced me to go home with them. I was about to leave, but Rick showed up the day I got released and told me that he hadn’t come back before because of my family. That he loved me, to come home, that he was sorry, Heidi meant nothing to him, blah, blah, blah. It was a dumb mistake, he loved me. And my dumb ass believed him. I think I was scared. I didn’t want to be the statistic. Now, I’m proud of my life and Angie, but then, I was scared. So I went home with him.” Wiping away her tears, she looked up at him and all he could do was stare at her. She was so strong. So amazing, it blew his mind that she was that girl at one time. “For the first two years of Angie’s life, Rick did nothing. He claimed he worked, but I never saw a lick of money. I was constantly borrowing money from my parents to get Angie the things she needed and working side jobs, tutoring the kids in the trailer park, and cleaning houses because I could take Angie with me. He hardly ever helped me. Bless her, she had such bad colic, and he would just leave. Let me deal with it as his mother yelled at me to ‘shut that baby up.’”