by A H S Salt
“Maybe because I’m practically naked!” I quickly opened my Mac jacket giving her a cheeky flash.
It wasn’t in my nature to be as brazen as I was that split-second, but it felt exciting to have Cillian who I had wanted for so long to want me too.
He brought the naughty side of me out.
Macey planted her face down on the oversized cushion, laughing, shocked at my cheekiness. I wrapped myself back up, pulling the belt tightly making sure nothing was on show.
“Why are you laughing” Feeling self-conscious I turned “That’s it I’m wearing a dress”
“Jess!” A moment later, Macey was in front of me with her hands on my shoulders.
I shrugged her off.
“You’re laughing at me” I moaned.
She raised her brows and shook her head “I’m not laughing at you” She scoffed “I just haven’t seen you being so bold and daring in such a long time” She grinned.
My nose wrinkled “Are you sure I look okay?”
She nodded “You look fucking fabulous” She turned and grabbed my smartphone from the table.
“Wait!” she said “You need to capture this moment”
Trust her to say that!
She reached out and adjusted my hair, twirling certain strands around her fingers. I was so preoccupied with getting ready, that it dawned on me that she was still here, this late.
I frowned “Are you sleeping over tonight?” I asked. She didn’t usually stay this late after our girl’s weekend. Usually, she would have up and left before noon.
“Do you mind?” She asked, stepping back and holding my Phone up horizontally.
“Of course not! You know you can stay anytime. Just this time, make sure the only person you will be sharing my bed with - is me!”
“Fair enough” She shrugged, unfazed at the fact she had shared my bed with a stranger. She glanced over the phone.
“Now smile” She ordered.
I smiled and tilted to an angle that I knew made my heart shape face more flattering, with my hand on my waist and one leg in front of the other the boom of flash clicked.
A classic Victoria Beckham pose.
Macey passed me my phone “My mom’s away for work this weekend, and the house is just too quiet ever since my dad-”. She sighed, and for a second I thought maybe, just maybe she would open up once more.
“Mace, you don’t need to explain. I love having you here.” I reached down, picking my car keys up off the table, jingling them at her. Quickly changing the subject as her awkwardness was clear to see.
“You’re driving.” Taking advantage of her staying over.
“Fine, let’s go!” Macey replied as she grabbed them from me “I wanna get back and get a start on the Shades of Blue box set. That Ray Liotta is hot” She noted walking out to the hall.
“Mace?” I patiently waited to see if she had noticed that she was still only wearing my oversized t-shirt and nothing else.
“What?” She sighed, turning to face me.
“Maybe you could… wear something else with that?” My eyes lowered to her tanned legs.
She glanced down “Oh, shit! Give me a minute.” She muttered.
She quickly dashed to my room.
My best friend always likes to point out that I don’t have a style, yet she is always wearing my clothes at any given opportunity. Following her to my bedroom, I stopped only to have one last look in the mirror, admiring how my glossy deep brown hair captured the light and surprisingly made my cloudy blue eyes look a lot brighter.
I pondered a few seconds “Maybe I should just wear a dress”
“Jess, Cillian will be begging for you to fuck him when he sees what you have on under that jacket.”
“Macey…!” I said high pitched, her words always so blunt. She struggled to pull on my gray sweatpants, loosening the tie around her curvy waist. I chuckled as I watched her bend down to tuck the material up at the ankles. For her, that was the worst part of sharing clothes with me. Everything I owned always made her look like a short ass. For only being a few inches shorter, it was noticeable when she wore my clothes.
“Let’s go before you change your mind!” She said while grabbing the spare pair of trainers she kept at mine.
We made our way out the side door of the building towards my car in the parking garage. I was glad it was parked there and not out on the street. I wasn’t sure if I would feel comfortable walking through the lobby, talking away to Joe. Considering I just had my knee-length Khaki Mac covering my modesty.
When we pulled out the garage, I reached up to pull my visor down, turning my head side to side checking to make sure my winged eyeliner was even.
“Are you planning on coming home tonight?” Macey asked, as we slowly came to a stop at a set of traffic lights.
I turned and looked at her.
“Yeah of course. We have that thing to do tomorrow!” I was shocked she wasn’t quick to reply with a cheeky-ass comment about Elijah. Her lips pursed together as she tried to think.
“Oh, the Elijah thing?” Mace whispered back.
“There you go!” Mocking her “It’s true what they say you know, you really should dye your hair blonde!” I teased, turning to look back into the mirror, steadying my hand to apply another layer of my favorite berry color lipstick.
“I swear, I’m a lot more intelligent than I come across at times!” Macey shot back trying to reassure me.
Both of us erupted into laughter.
Not many people got to witness the real Macey not the way I did, she would at times come across cold, and standoffish it took her a while to warm to people. To me, she was the loving, kind girl that took me under her wing in junior high after some kids were making fun of me. I remember her standing up to the bullies - warning them they would have to go through her to get to me. She had gotten a reputation for not backing down from fights. The bullies that towered over her were quick to avoid me from that day on, and we’ve been inseparable ever since.
“Less about Elijah!” She scoffed, patting me on my leg “Jessica’s back in the game!” Macey said playfully, as she skimmed her tongue over her teeth. I couldn’t blame her, she was worried I was going to become a nun.
“I was never in the game” I interjected, giving her a look. After splitting up from Elijah. She had seen the tears I shed from worrying about what people would think of me if my dirty secret was ever to be discovered.
She witnessed the sleepless nights I had, when I was stressing my mom would find out I kept something so serious from her, worrying at how much shame it would cause her. Macey never judged me she just held me close, being the best friend I could always rely on. Cillian is the first man I’ve been with since Elijah, she must be relieved that I haven’t given up on men altogether.
I surprised myself, I knew the only reason I was comfortable with Cillian, was because I’d known him for as long as I can remember. It was just a gut feeling, telling me it was right.
When we pulled up at the club, there was no queue extending around the corner. The two bouncers were standing guard at the double doors, talking among one another.
I glanced at my wrist “Five to Eight, I should go” I said, looking up from my Vivienne Westwood Gold tone watch - a birthday gift from Riley - a present he proudly bought without anyone telling him what to get me for a change.
“What are you waiting for? Go and get your man!” Macey insisted, nudging me with her elbow playfully.
“He’s not my man.” I scoffed, as I tried to get out of the car without exposing myself.
“Have fun!” Macey teased.
“See you later,” I replied, closing the car door behind me, refusing to play along to her playful banter.
I made my way towards the club. The heaviness in my chest began to lift. I was feeling more excited now at the thought of seeing Cillian. The bouncers stopped talking, both of them glanced towards me, watching as I walked closer.
“Jessica?” They both asked simultaneou
sly, unsure if they had the right person.
“Yeah,” I cautiously replied. Confused as to how they knew my name.
“The boss is waiting for you in his office,” The stocky bouncer said, reaching for the door and holding it open.
“Thanks” I murmured, walking in. Hoping he didn’t remember me using a different name the night before.
I made my way down the stairs, bumping my weight against the double frosted doors to push it open.
Two Feet - Love Is a Bitch was crooning low throughout the room. There was only a handful of staff scattered around, setting up for the night ahead.
My heels echoed over the sound of the music as I made my way towards the back of the room, prepared to make my way around the dance floor, instead of passing through it.
“The girl who owes me a kiss!” a male voice called out loud enough that it had me looking over my shoulder, to see who he was referring to - not realizing he was talking about me.
I turned back towards the bar to see the barman that had asked me for a kiss in return for a shot. He was smiling, staring right at me with his hands flat down on the bar.
I pointed my finger toward him “Ryan, right?” My brows knitted, unsure if I had his name correct.
His whole face lit up “Got it in one. What can I do for you? Did you come back to give me your number?” He asked flashing me a cheeky grin.
A blush crept over my face. My hand reached for my hair nervously brushing it behind my ear.
I walked closer, not wanting to shout.
A smile teased his lips “I’m just toying with you” he interrupted “What are you having?” He asked confidently, putting an empty shot glass in view. The club wasn’t even opened for at least another half hour, yet he was willing to bend the rules for me.
My hands shot up, refusing “Oh, no, I’m okay, thanks. I’m here to see-”
“-C’mon” He coaxed “Blueberry? Strawberry maybe? It’s on me.” He insisted rhyming off the flavors I had from the night before while presenting a bottle of each flavor in his hands. I glanced up at Cillian’s office, wondering if he knew I was here.
A little Dutch courage couldn’t go amiss.
Turning with a smile “Okay” I said “I’ll have one” I could not pass up a free shot “Let’s go with blueberry,” I pulled a stool out and sat down, taking him up on his offer.
I watched as he held the bottle a little higher, the blue liquor splashing into the tiny shot glass. He passed it towards me watching, studying me as I downed the fruity liquor.
“Mmm, that’s got to be my favorite by far,” I told him, licking my lips. I carefully checked the shot glass to make sure I got every little drop before passing it back to him. I could have easily gone another one but decided against it.
Ryan glanced behind me, nodding with a tight-lipped smile, as he slid the bottle of liquor out of sight.
“Jessica!” Cillian’s voice sharply exclaimed right over my shoulder. Making me feel like I’d just been chastised. I turned to face him and sheepishly slipped off the stool.
“Cillian,” I said low and soft. My stare danced over him. He wore another smart looking suit, yet again in black paired with another White shirt. Only this time, there were no buttons undone giving me a glimpse of his chest hair. I figured, he must own the same style of suits and shirts. Maybe he prefers the business look at the club, I preferred him in his casual clothes to his suits. Nonetheless, he was still hot no matter what he wore.
“Ryan was just-”.
“-I’m aware of what Ryan was doing,” He sniped abruptly, cutting me off before I could finish what I was going to say. The rudeness in his tone, had me feeling uneasy.
“I don’t pay you to flirt, Ryan,” Cillian warned directing a cold stare at the bartender.
“Sorry boss, I was -”
. Cillian dismissed him with a flick of his hand “Unless it's work-related, I don’t wanna hear it” He warned, refusing to hear him out. I stared at Cillian, totally shocked at his attitude. Ryan moved towards the far end of the bar, keeping his distance from Cillian.
“Cillian, that was rude.” I kept my voice low, so none of the other employees could hear me. I was surprised he would give his employee a telling off in front of me.
“I won’t stand for him, or any of my staff flirting with you,” He warned, gesturing towards the coded doors, encouraging me to follow as he turned walking towards his office.
“He wasn’t flirting” I cursed under my breath.
Cillian shook his head and paused for a second.
Looking over his shoulder “Trust me, he was flirting!” He said, before walking away again. He kept his hands in his black suit pants. He was still at ease and laid back even after the tone he used to warn Ryan from me. It was only harmless flirting in my eyes but I wasn’t willing to admit that to Cillian.
I stood with my arms crossed, refusing to follow him.
Cillian stopped and turned to face me.
“Jessica, my office, now,” His tone more forceful, noticing I wasn’t following behind. He pulled his hand free and held it out for me.
I raised an eyebrow “You don’t get to tell me what to do!” I said, standing my ground.
He sighed heavily “If we are going to have an argument” He gestured to his office “Can we do it somewhere private?”
I looked around nervously. If the staff was watching and listening they were doing it discreetly.
“Fine” I muttered. I was still slightly annoyed at the tone he took with Ryan. Regardless, I walked towards him not wanting anyone else to get a telling off from my childish behavior. I clasped my hand in his hand, allowing him to grasp it as he led the way.
“I don’t like it when other people flirt with what’s mine,” He said tightly, looking directly at me.
I almost choked on my laughter.
“What do you mean by - What’s mine?” I demanded to know with raised brows “You say that like you own my ass” I had never seen this possessive side to him. It was unsettling but at the same time, a flutter of excitement jabbed at my heart that he cared that much about me. We came to a stop at the double doors. Cillian roamed his hand over the number pad, punching in the code allowing us access.
We took the stairs up to his office, our arms brushing against each other as we made our way up in silence. The irritation left me, as excitement took over, knowing I was wearing only my panties under my jacket. My heartbeat started racing at the thought of him growing hard for me.
I pressed my palm flat on the frosted glass and pushed it open. I stepped in first. I had barely let go of the thick stem of glass before Cillian quickly pulled me into him, taking me by surprise and backing me up against the doors.
He held me tight, trapping my arms in between our embrace.
What the hell has gotten into him?.
First, he was rude to his staff, then he was all over me.
He pressed his lips against my forehead.
“Now that I have you, I don’t want anyone or anything getting in the way,” Cillian said softly, releasing his hands around me, just enough allowing me to pull back to look up at perfectness. His strong jawline no doubt have many men envy him, his only flaw being he was unaware just how jaw-droppingly handsome he was.
I stared at him “You owe Ryan the apology!” correcting him “I know that whatever this is between us is going to be intense Cillian, but claiming that I belong to you, doesn’t sit well with me.” It was a lie because it turned me on. But I refused to feed his ego.
His body stiffened at my response, unsure of what he had said wrong. I shrugged free needing more space as a shiver trembled down my spine - remembering that’s how it all started with Elijah. He tricked me with the words that have you thinking you’re someone’s one and only, and each time I was a fool for falling for it.
“Jess, is it wrong? That I want you” Cillian snapped “We’ve waited so long to have one another, why hold back now!”
I turned my back on him and
walked straight for the bar, in need of a stiff drink and not an argument.
Cillian had no idea that those words would trigger me.
“You’re doing it again,” He muttered under his breath, only I heard him. I paused, and closed my eyes, gaining my composure.
I hadn’t come for an argument.
He had seen me over the years, walking away refusing to deal with issues head-on. When Riley and I got caught up in sibling arguments, he always kept out of our spats, refusing to take sides. Here I was stuck in the same predicament – refusing to deal with my shit head on!
1
SCANDALOUS PAST
CHAPTER 9
“Drink? I asked, pretending not to have heard him. I tilted the bottles on his bar looking for Jack Daniels’. Cillian, pulled the stool out, sitting in front of the bar, giving me full reign of the drinks.
“Damn it! This will do.” I reached for a different bourbon, not caring what it tasted like. I desperately needed something, anything! I grabbed two small tumblers from under the bar, the glasses clanked as I laid them side by side, to pour the bourbon into them. Cillian studied me as I slid his drink closer to him.
“Talk to me, Jessica?” He said in a low voice.
I raised my brows and gave a weak smile.
“I didn’t come to talk. I came to fuck. So here’s to a night ruined” I raised my glass mid-air before I downed it in the one gulp, not even giving myself the opportunity to taste it. Not needing to, I wasn’t drinking it for the taste. It was for the shock of hearing Cillian, the man I have waited for so long to tell me he wanted me, just to hear him say it in a way that had me ready to run. Before Elijah, I would have jumped for joy at hearing the words he had spoken, but after the mind-boggling two years, I had suffered at the hands of a mind fucker, I was wary of anyone offering kind words.
I was torn.
I had heard all the promises and lies before to hear Cillian say I belonged to him was a nice thought but a tinge of worry still cautioned me against it.
I had no idea he had a possessive streak.
A worry niggled at the back of my mind, as to what he truly wanted in return.