Make it So!

by Christian Kallias

  What is happening to me? Someone help! Boomer, Zee…anybody!

  A voice inside his mind spoke. It was male, alien in nature, and certainly creepy, like someone devoid of all emotion.

  My name is Orion eight-three-nine-six.

  Who are you? And what do you want?

  From now on, I am the new master of this body.

  6

  Lacuna’s ship exited hyperspace. The engines of the rental ship overheated.

  “Fuck!” she exclaimed. “Why am I not surprised this piece of crap hasn’t been well maintained.”

  She checked her controls and ran a diagnostic. A power conduit near the engine had blown. Or maybe her bypassing safety features had turned a Mark V engine into a Mark Zero. That was a possibility too, she admitted.

  “Dammit, this is going to take hours to fix…Darmak!” she shouted.

  The big Domdori came running into the cockpit when he hit his head against the top of the opening and slipped, hitting his head again on the hard floor. Darmak lost consciousness, and Lacuna buried her face in her hands.

  “Right, he doesn’t deal with stress very well. Why do I keep forgetting this?”

  Lacuna undid her motorized seatbelt, and it retracted into the chair. She went by her henchman and crawled next to him, gently slapping his face.

  “Wake up, Darmak, I need you. Come on.”

  From the sound of both impacts, she wouldn’t be surprised if he had suffered a concussion or two. She knew it was very wrong of her, but she couldn’t help it and knocked on the top of his forehead. It sounded hollow.

  “Well, maybe there isn’t that much brain to concuss. Hopefully.”

  I‘m a horrible person. Oh well…what else is new?

  She returned to her seat and looked at a holo-starmap. They had been making good time until the engine blew, but they were still a few hours away from catching up with Kevin and his annoying Sphynx companion. The subcutaneous subspace beacon she had injected into his dog friend was still transmitting. At least there was that.

  He had sensed the threat she presented to their safety, and if he had made the decision instead of Kevin, Lacuna had no doubt that she wouldn’t be breathing right now.

  She had to admit the four-legged, furry creature was quite intelligent for his size. Even though she had bested him with a simple throwing of a stun baton in the air. Later, when they met in battle conditions, the creature had displayed impressive fighting skills.

  She would have to keep an eye on him. Perhaps she could convince Kevin she was a valuable asset, but she doubted that the dog would see it that way.

  First, she had to fix the engines. She got up again and walked over Darmak who was still unconscious on the floor. She tried lifting him but he weighed a ton, at least from her perspective, and he wouldn’t budge. The point of impact on his forehead had bulged into a rather nasty bump, so her first order of business would be to get a med kit and tend to his wounds.

  It took ten minutes to find one, and as soon as the dermal regenerator had done its magic, she used the medical scanner to make sure Darmak hadn’t sustained any additional life-threatening injuries. When that was done, she tried gently slapping him awake but that didn’t seem to work. The med kit didn’t contain a stim pack so she concluded that time would do the rest and reluctantly headed toward the engine room by herself.

  Boomer took the opportunity with all three kittens sleeping to leave his quarters and head to the bridge where Ziron was working with multiple floating holo-screens around him.

  “Hey,” said Boomer.

  Ziron didn’t answer. Boomer felt bad, even though he hadn’t connected with the Sphynx the way Kevin had, Ziron had saved him and Kevin multiple times. One could argue that they wouldn’t have needed saving in the first place had Kevin not agreed to help the Confederate.

  But Boomer had considered Ziron’s claim that Kevin both needed and craved the quest they were undertaking. And even though they had risked their lives on multiple occasions, Boomer could tell these adventures had given Kevin a purpose and the spark he had been looking for out of life for such a long time. Until he was abducted, that is.

  Boomer knew he had hurt Ziron’s feelings earlier and couldn’t blame him for giving him the cold shoulder. When it became clear that Ziron wouldn’t answer, Boomer continued.

  “Look, man, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean what I said.”

  “We both know you did, and that’s okay. I can’t blame you either. We have not only endangered the both of you, but perhaps your entire world. Just know I’ll do what I can to prevent you, Kevin, and your world from suffering the consequences of the good deeds you both have performed.”

  “I know you will, thank you.”

  “How are the kittens? Have you named them yet?”

  “Shouldn’t that responsibility be yours?”

  “It’s tradition for the caretaker to assign them names.”

  “What’s wrong with number one, two, and three?”

  “That’s hardly original. Would you have liked it if Kevin had called you number one?”

  Boomer remembered the many Next Generation episodes they watched together and suppressed a giggle.

  “He might very well have, but for different reasons.”

  “I’m not sure I understand.”

  “You weren’t meant to, that’s between Kevin and me. But, okay, I’ll try and find more appropriate names for them. Look, I’m sorry for making fun of you and. . .well, for blaming you for something that, in the end, wasn’t really your fault.”

  Ziron’s cushion hovered down to Boomer’s level.

  “That’s big of you to admit, and it helps to hear you say it, thanks. The guilt of the situation has been eating at me and distracting me from my work. You have to understand that I don’t want anything bad to happen to Kevin. He’s my friend too.”

  Boomer barked once. “I do, I’m just so damn angry, you know?”

  “I know, I am too. And perhaps it wasn’t fair of me to ask you for help in retrieving Kalliopy’s sister. I feel conflicted between following orders and doing what I know in my heart I should be doing.”

  “And what would that be?”

  “Getting Kevin, of course. Knowing him, he would do everything in his power to help, even if Kalliopy betrayed him.”

  “I think so too.”

  “Still, nothing would stop Xonax from using the sister as a bargaining chip again. We’d be right back where we started.”

  “Perhaps, but at least we’d know about it, and we could prepare for contingencies. Speaking of which, where are you with the smart armor?”

  “I’ve cannibalized as many systems as I feel comfortable doing on this ship. It still needs to be able to defend itself from attack.”

  “You also have the remaining destroyers from the ancient fleet.”

  “I know, but the tech is too old for me to adapt it to the Osiris. They’ll provide cover though, should we need some.”

  “Oh, you’ll need cover. There’s no way the Kregan will stand still forever.”

  “Yeah, I agree.”

  “So what’s your ETA on the smart armor?”

  “I’ll have it for you later today. It won’t be as advanced as the last one you used, but it will give you an edge, nonetheless.”

  “Anything would at this point. Beagles aren’t exactly considered formidable warriors.”

  Ziron smiled. “I was trying to spare your feelings. Armor or not, you have more courage than I have seen in many bipeds, I want you to know that.”

  Boomer smiled back. “I certainly appreciate it, thanks, Zee. Keep me posted.”

  “Will do.”

  It was the most horrific of sensations, to feel one’s body, muscles, and limbs move on their own with no control over them; Kevin had never felt so terrified.

  What the fuck do you mean you’re the master of this body? This is my body!

  Not anymore. I’m in control now. I’d appreciate it if you stayed quiet. I do not engage wit
h lower life forms.

  I’m not a lower life form, and if you think I am, then get the fuck out and return my body back to me.

  I’m afraid I can’t do that. This is my purpose, it’s part of my programming.

  You’re an AI.

  Correct. I’m Orion eight-three-nine-six.

  You’ve said that already, I don’t particularly give a rat’s ass about your designation or serial number.

  You can call me eight-three-nine-six.

  Yeah, cause that makes it so much simpler. And you can kiss my ass.

  Anatomically impossible. I reside in a tiny implant near your neo-cortex, which makes your request impossible.

  They didn’t program you with a sense of humor, did they?

  Humor is a subjective thing and has been programmed by my creator. It is not, however, a core system or one of my primary functions. I serve my master, all other functions are futile.

  Swell, I’m trapped with a toaster in my head.

  I do not know what a toaster is.

  Never mind that. What about that master of yours, who would that be?

  At this current time: Captain Altanor.

  Of course, it is.

  Kevin had the feeling that that’s where his body was going next, back onto the pirate ship. The moment he was inside, the cargo door lifted and the engines rumbled to life. His body kept walking toward the living area of the ship.

  Can I get back control of my body now, please?

  I am not responsible or authorized for deciding the times you are allowed control. Altanor is.

  Are you always on?

  I do require to be shutdown and recharged from time to time.

  Define time to time.

  Twenty minutes every twenty hours of operation.

  That was not good news. It would only give him a limited window to try and get the thing out of his head. Not that he knew how he would do that. Not to mention drilling a hole in his head on his own was something he was eager to experience. Things looked bad; very bad, in fact.

  Soon they arrived in front of the pirate captain.

  “I’m Orion eight-three-nine-six, you can call me 8-3-9-6,” said Kevin.

  It was his voice, but he wasn’t doing the talking. The whole thing felt like a lucid nightmare. Kevin knew he wasn’t that lucky. This was all too real.

  Altanor said, “I assume you have total control?”

  “Affirmative.”

  “Alright, it’s time to see what you can do.”

  Altanor activated his communication device. “We’re all on board, get us to the coordinates I provided earlier, maximum hyperspace.”

  A voice answered. “Coordinates set. Leaving atmosphere now and entering hyperspace.”

  I want to talk to him, said Kevin.

  “Captain,” said 8-3-9-6, “this body’s owner would like a word with you.”

  Captain Altanor walked right up to Kevin’s face. Uncomfortably close, in fact.

  “Now you want to talk?” said Altanor with an evil grin. “The thing is, I have what I want, and therefore, I don’t need you anymore. I hope you enjoy being a prisoner in your own body, forever.”

  7

  “Mira,” said Boomer, “I’m starving.”

  “So?” she said with an amused tone.

  Boomer had no doubt she was being playful with him regarding his remark about her lack of understanding sarcasm. Boomer actually enjoyed interacting with Mira, it was quite endearing.

  “Ok, ok…you learn fast, I’ll grant you that. Now can I get some food, please?”

  “Affirmative. I’m beaming food to your bowl,” said Mira.

  And just like magic, food appeared. Except, before Boomer could have a go at it, all three Sphynx kittens, previously engaged in jumping on the beagle’s back and pulling on his whiskers for the umpteenth time, darted to the food.

  Oh, hell no!

  Boomer growled when about half of his bowl had been ravaged, and the kittens froze and stared at him, wondering what they should do next.

  “That’s my food! Just keep sucking on energy from the ship, I thought you liked that shit.”

  “If I may,” said Mira.

  “Go ahead.”

  “While the kittens will survive as long as their bodies can siphon minute energy particles and convert them for their bodies to function, it doesn’t mean they aren’t hungry. Their physiologies have adapted for survival in a process that took centuries, but they have a digestive system, and like you, they enjoy eating.”

  “Then give them their own food.”

  “Be that as it may, you’re going to have to train them to know the difference.”

  Boomer sighed. “Swell.”

  “Naming them could help this interaction.”

  Boomer used his paw to point at each of them. “Sonic, Zelda, and you’ll be Mario.”

  Since Boomer had stopped growling, the one kitten Boomer had named Zelda slowly approached the bowl while still looking at Boomer.

  Boomer shook his head from side to side. “Nope, don’t you dare, I’ll get you your own food.”

  But Zelda kept approaching the bowl, using slow-motion stealth, never losing sight of Boomer’s gaze. Soon, she was slowly lapping Boomer’s food.

  Zee’s voice resounded from the speakers. “Boomer, can you come to the bridge, we have a contact.”

  Ah, screw it. I’ll eat later when they go back to sleep.

  Boomer left the room, and Sonic and Mario joined Zelda and devoured the food in record time like a pack of starving lions.

  “Now the hard part begins,” said Lacuna aloud even though she was alone in the cockpit.

  She could hear Darmak snoring through the two closed access doors. The area around his bed trembled from the noise, which was something her brain still had problems reconciling. She had scanned him earlier, making sure he wasn’t bleeding internally, but the medical scanner had found nothing wrong with him. Hopefully, he would wake up on his own soon.

  She would like to have his assistance when reconnecting with Kevin, but it looked like she would have to do that part on her own, which elevated her anxiety somewhat.

  With any luck, they won’t shoot me out of the sky the first chance they get.

  The rental ship had shields and some weapons, though she had had to redirect a good portion of the power from the weapons to engage the hyperspace engine. But that didn’t really matter. The ship stood no chance in combat against the Osiris, let alone the ancient destroyers that were accompanying it. If push came to shove, it would be wiser for her to reactivate the hyperspace engines and run rather than to try and fight against such odds.

  Time was up, and she was about to exit hyperspace outside of the firing range of the Arcadian ships. Better not make herself an easy target. She was willing to risk calling them, not wanting to get shot before she made contact.

  No matter how many times she had rehearsed an apology speech for Kevin, her mind was now drawing a blank, so she would have to wing it. Perhaps it was better this way, maybe for once it would sound authentic.

  She turned her holo-screen on and opened a channel before swallowing hard.

  “This is Lacuna, please respond.”

  The holo-screen filled with an image of Ziron, he did not look kindly on her.

  “Weren’t you supposed to be on your way back to Omicronia? How did you manage to escape?”

  “Hello to you too,” she tried staying as amicable as she could. “Could I please speak to Kevin?”

  Boomer’s head kept appearing and disappearing out of the frame, apparently the holo-camera on the Osiris was too high for him to be able to see or be seen.

  “Just shoot the bitch!” she heard Boomer say.

  “Quiet!” Ziron told him. He turned back toward Lacuna and said, “Kevin isn’t here.”

  That was not what she had anticipated. Both the dog and Sphynx hated her guts, and she doubted she could convince any of them about her change of heart regarding a possible future collaboratio
n. If she was being one hundred percent truthful with herself, and the roles were reversed, she wouldn’t trust herself either.

  “I’m sorry to hear that. Do you mind telling me where he is?”

  “Why aren’t you shooting her?” complained Boomer whose head and floppy ears kept appearing on and off the screen.

  “Please, don’t,” she pleaded. “I’m truly sorry for my behavior, and I want to make amends.”

  “Yeah, right!” barked Boomer.

  Ziron looked down and frowned in frustration. “Boomer! What the heck are you doing?”

  The holo-screen image flickered a couple of times.

  “I’m pressing all the buttons on your stupid console until I find the one that will shoot weapons!” Boomer’s voice could be heard off-camera.

  “Well, stop it!” complained Ziron. “That’s not how this works, you’re going to knock us offline and then we’ll be sitting ducks.”

  “I won’t fire on you, I give you my word.”

  Boomer briefly appeared on the screen and as his ears went out of frame, he said, “Tell that to someone who cares! Come on, Zee, just shoot her, eh? Do it for me, pal.”

  “Enough, stop it,” said Ziron.

  Lacuna kept silent and let the two of them argue over what to do for another minute or two until they realized that she was looking at them. Once Ziron resumed visual contact with her, she broke her silence.

  “Look, I don’t expect you to trust me, so I’m going to send you some valuable information.”

  “Let me tell you where you can put it!” said Boomer the next time he was in the frame.

  Lacuna could tell that he was getting tired of jumping up and down. But she had to admit the dog was cute, and she suppressed a smile every time his ears shot up then down as gravity brought him back to the floor.

  “Transmitting now,” she said.

  “I’ll get back to you,” said Ziron. “Please don’t move your ship or we’ll consider it an act of aggression and engage you.”