Lucky Me, Lucy McGee

by Mary Amato

  Scarlett frowned.

  “You said it could be about anything,” Resa said. “I saw a bird, and it reminded me of that bird going to the bathroom on Lucy’s head.”

  “This is going to be good,” Phillip said.

  “I don’t think I want to be reminded,” I said.

  Resa wants to be a stand-up comedian when she grows up, and she is good at making us laugh, so we knew this would be funny. She put her arms out as if they were wings and sang.

  I am a bird; I fly through the air.

  I gobble bugs here and there.

  When I’m in the sky, you should beware.

  I might ploop my goop on your hair.

  Everybody laughed.

  “Good song, Resa,” Phillip said.

  “Funny and true,” I said.

  “Thank you!” Resa said.

  That was hard to beat.

  Phillip stood up. He sang:

  My name is Phillip Lee.

  You should pick me.

  ’Cause I taught you all to play the ukulele.

  I got fingers like lightning.

  I sing amazingly.

  I’m the biggest, baddest fan of Ben & Bree.

  Resa and I clapped.

  Phillip bowed.

  “Your turn, Lucy,”

  Scarlett said.

  My two brains started arguing again.

  Lucy, make up a song right now. It has to be great.

  —Be quiet! I’m trying to think.

  Then I started singing.

  I’ve got two brains in my mixed-up head.

  They don’t get along. They fight instead.

  One says yes and the other says no.

  One says fast and the other says slow.

  One hates my guts and the other thinks I’m fine.

  I want to trade them in for a brand-new mind.

  Everybody clapped. I did it! I did it!

  Phillip nodded at me. “Hate to admit it, but that was good.”

  We all looked at Scarlett. The big moment arrived. She bit a nail and got a worried look on her face. “I didn’t think of this before,” she said. “But if I pick one of you, then the rest of you will be mad at me.”

  We were all quiet. It was kind of true. I wouldn’t want to be in her shoes, even though they were polished!

  A few seconds passed. I crossed my fingers so tight I was afraid they’d never come apart.

  Finally, she shook her head. “I can’t do it. Forget the contest.”

  Phillip plopped down on the ground. “Oh brother!”

  The bell rang. Recess was over.

  “You have to pick somebody!” Victoria said.

  “Do something fair like draw straws or roll a dice or pick a card to win,” Resa said.

  “Something that doesn’t make us all your servants,” Phillip said as he got up from the ground.

  “Something that gives everybody the same chance,” I said.

  “Okay,” Scarlett said. “I’ll think about it and come up with a new plan tomorrow.”

  “Uh-oh. Don’t look up,” Resa said.

  We all looked up. A bird was flying right toward us.

  “Aaaaaaah!” we all screamed, and ran in.

  Chapter Ten

  WHY NOT TRY?

  Here’s a great question: Why aren’t four-leaf clovers red? I wish they were red, because then they’d be easier for me to find, and I’d have better luck. After school, I looked in my front and backyard for a lucky clover. All I found were grass and ants.

  If Scarlett made us pick numbers or draw cards tomorrow, I was definitely going to lose. I had to do something.

  An idea popped into my brain. I could go to Scarlett’s house and convince her that she should pick me. It would be a lot easier to do it if it was just her and me talking.

  I ran inside. Lily saw me and came running over to hug my knees—except it was a funny kind of shuffle because she was wearing my dad’s shoes. She had his hat on, too.

  “Hi, Lily!” I said.

  “Dess,” she said, which is her word for dress up. She dragged me into the living room. The floor was covered with costumes and my dad was sitting in the middle with a tutu on his head.

  “Very cute, Dad,” I said.

  “Thanks,” he said, catching Lily who dove into his lap.

  Leo turned into a turtle and crawled behind my dad. It was getting to be all turtle all the time with that kid.

  “Can I walk over to Scarlett’s and ask her something?” I asked. “It won’t take long.”

  “Sure,” he said. “But make it short, Lucy. I need a break so I can get dinner going.”

  “Do we have any fancy cookies?” I asked.

  “Why?” he asked.

  “Scarlett loves them.”

  He gave me a look. “What’s going on, Lucy?”

  I sighed. “Scarlett has an extra ticket to the Ben & Bree show, and I want her to pick me. So why not bring her over a few cookies?”

  My dad sighed. “You can’t bribe friends, Lucy.”

  “I can try,” I said.

  He gave me his serious look. “Lucy, you can go to Scarlett’s, but no cookies.”

  “Fine,” I said. “I’ll use my words to convince her.”

  “No begging!” he said.

  “But—”

  He shook his head. “Begging is annoying.”

  “You know, Dad,” I said. “If grown-ups thought kids were cute when we beg, our lives would be a lot easier.”

  He laughed. “Well, that was pretty cute.”

  “Can I have a ticket now, please?”

  “Nope.”

  It was my turn to sigh. “You tell me not to be a quitter, but then you tell me to quit begging.”

  He smiled. “Yep. The rules of life are complicated, but I think you know in your heart of hearts what’s right.”

  I promised not to be annoying, and I grabbed my backpack and walked to Scarlett’s. I could see the front of her house and the driveway of the school from my house, which is why I got to walk there on my own. As I walked, I practiced what I was going to say to her. By the time I reached her house, I was ready!

  Chapter Eleven

  ME, AND A CAT, AND…WHO’S THAT?

  I knocked on Scarlett’s door. No answer. I stepped over to the front window and peered in.

  Her living room was dark. WHOOSH! Out of nowhere a face came at me in the window. Spooked, I jumped back and—WHOA!—tripped over a bush. CRASH! I fell right on my rear.

  There, perched in the window and hissing at me was Princess Coconut, Scarlett’s cat.

  To say that Princess Coconut doesn’t like me is not strong enough. She hates me. I don’t know why.

  I picked myself up and brushed off the dirt. Then I went into the backyard to see if Scarlett was in the shed, which Scarlett calls her Craft Cottage. Empty. No car in the driveway, either.

  Just my luck. Nobody home.

  I couldn’t go home without doing something, so I sat on her patio, pulled a pencil and paper out of my backpack, and wrote her a letter.

  Dear Scarlett,

  You are my best friend because you’re so sweet and smart and all I think about is how much I want to be like you.

  My heart knew that wasn’t true. I tried again.

  Hi Scarlett,

  You have a ticket. I want a ticket. Let’s work out a trade. If you give me that ticket, I’ll give you whatever of mine that you want. You wouldn’t want my clothes or shoes because yours are way nicer than mine. I don’t have any money. So that’s out. You always say you hate having a little sister, so what about Leo? I couldn’t give him to you forever because we would miss him, but you could have him for a day. For example, on a day when he
is being a turtle, which is cute.

  Okay. My heart knew that last part was a lie. Leo is cute when he’s being a wolf or an owl or a duck or a puppy or a pig or a bush baby or a wallaby, but he isn’t fun when he’s being a turtle.

  As I finished, I could feel eyes on me. I looked up, and there in the window was Princess Coconut again. She was looking at me out the back window as if she wanted to pounce on my head.

  Just then a noise came from the side of the house. Someone was coming. Since no car had pulled up, it couldn’t be Scarlett. A scary thought popped into my head. What if it was a robber?

  I jumped up and ran behind the Craft Cottage.

  It was strange…. It sounded like something was rolling on the ground…. It was probably a robber rolling a huge suitcase along to put stuff in. If I jumped out, maybe I would save the day, and Scarlett’s parents would give me a whole bunch of tickets. Or maybe the bad guy would stuff me in the suitcase!

  I was still trying to decide when I heard another sound. I think the robber heard it, too, because the sound of the rolling stopped.

  A new set of footsteps were coming from the other side of the house. Another robber! Scarlett’s parents were very rich. Bad guys were probably always watching their house to see when no one was home. I never should have come! I was probably going to get kidnapped, and I’d never see my parents or Leo or Lily or my friends again! They would miss me, and I would miss them. Poor Leo would be so sad, he would probably stay in his turtle shell forever.

  Chapter Twelve

  BAD GUYS’ SURPRISE

  Since there were now two robbers, one that I heard on the right side of the house and one on the left, I decided the safest thing was to stay hidden behind the cottage. I took a step back, and—CRASH!—I tripped over a little tree stump. BLAM! On my rear a second time!

  A scary silence followed.

  The robbers knew I was back there, so I decided to make a run for it. I ran out, screaming, and the bad guys started screaming, too. Except they weren’t bad guys. One was Phillip holding his bike, and the other was Resa.

  We stopped screaming and stared at each other.

  “What are you doing here, Lucy?” Phillip asked.

  “What are you doing here, Phillip?” I asked.

  “What are you both doing here?” Resa asked. “You guys almost gave me a heart attack.”

  “This is embarrassing,” Phillip said. “We all know why we’re here. We’re all trying to get that ticket.”

  “It’s life or death for me,” I said. “I need to win that ukulele.”

  “You still haven’t found yours?”

  I shook my head.

  “What did your parents say?” Phillip asked.

  “I haven’t even told them,” I said.

  “Yikes,” Resa said.

  Phillip looked at Resa. “Maybe we could help Lucy buy a new one.”

  Resa reached in her pocket. “Yeah, I’m rich. I’ve got seven cents.”

  I laughed.

  “We could do something to earn the money,” Phillip said. “You know…like a lemonade stand. When I was six, I made ten bucks doing that, and the lemonade was terrible.”

  “If we sold something more valuable than lemonade, we could earn more money,” Resa said.

  “That’s so nice,” I said. “But—”

  “I’ve got it!” Phillip said. “Come on!”

  He rolled his bike back out of the driveway, and the three of us walked to the corner. He parked his bike and took his uke out of his backpack. “Take off your hat, Resa,” he said. “And put it on the ground. We’re going to sing, and people are going to throw money into the hat!”

  “You’re insane, Phillip,” Resa said.

  “Let’s do it!” I said.

  Resa put her seven cents into the hat so people would get the idea. Phillip had a quarter, which he added.

  “What should we sing?” Phillip asked.

  I taught them my pity party song, and we sang it.

  I’m a loser. I got no luck.

  When a bird flies by, I forget to duck.

  Four-leaf clover? Just makes me sneeze.

  Cough near me, I’ll get a disease.

  Come to my pity party, please, oh please.

  Come to my pity party, please.

  Two cars went by.

  We made up some new verses.

  An old guy walking his dog passed us. The dog stopped and sniffed at the hat. We kept singing. The guy reached into his pocket! And then he pulled out a tissue and blew his nose. “Catchy song,” he said, and kept walking.

  “At least he didn’t leave us his snot rag,” Resa whispered.

  We kept singing.

  When I cross my fingers, all I get is an ache.

  If I drop something fancy, it’s gonna break.

  Come to my pity party, please, oh please.

  Come to my pity party, please.

  Two middle school kids were coming on bikes. Uh-oh. They were probably going to tease us. They were probably going to say something really mean. They slowed down.

  “Just keep singing,” Phillip whispered.

  My genie in a bottle? Got shipped to France.

  I get no prize when the game is chance.

  Come to my pity party, please, oh please.

  Come to my pity party, please.

  They stopped and listened to us. At the end of our song, there was silence. And then one said, “That was funny.”

  The other nodded. “Yeah. Not bad.”

  “Thanks!” Phillip said.

  “Feel free to tip us,” Resa said.

  I thought they would laugh.

  “We don’t have any money,” the first one said. “But that’s cool.”

  They rode off.

  Phillip looked at me. “Did he just say we were cool?”

  We didn’t make money, but it still felt great.

  We played a few more songs. A woman passing by with her kids stopped and gave her kids each a quarter to put in the hat.

  “Thanks!” we called out.

  And then one of her kids ran back and threw something else in the hat.

  We all looked.

  A gumball.

  “That’s kind of gross,” Resa said. “And kind of sweet at the same time.”

  Phillip dumped the change and the gumball into my hand. “It’s all yours, Lucy!”

  I got a big feeling inside me. I mean, I know it wasn’t much, but it made me feel so good. I felt like my heart was the hat, and my friends just poured a thousand dollars into it. You don’t need money to feel rich. All you need are good friends.

  Chapter Thirteen

  WILL IT BE ME?

  On Wednesday a little bit of luck came my way. Before school, Ms. Adamson sent a message to parents that she had to cancel Songwriting Club because she had to leave school early. Whew! That meant I had a little more time to find my uke.

  I was excited to go to school because Scarlett was going to pick one of us fair and square, and it could be me.

  Because it was raining, we went inside right away instead of lining up on the playground. So, as soon as we put our backpacks in our cubbies, we all huddled around Scarlett’s cubby.

  “I’ve written your names down on these pieces of paper,” Scarlett said, showing us five little folded notes. “I’ll mix them up and pick one.”

  “Let’s do it now,” Phillip said. “Before Mrs. Brock starts the morning routine.”

  We crouched down in a circle.

  Everybody crossed their fingers.

  “Scarlett, even though they all look alike, you should close your eyes to make sure it’s fair,” Mara said.

  Scarlett closed her eyes and shook the five little pieces of folded paper in her cupped hands and then tossed them onto the floor like dice.

&nb
sp; I chanted in my head: Let it be me, Lucy McGee. Let it be me, Lucy McGee. Let it be me, Lucy McGee.

  Scarlett picked up a piece of paper and unfolded it. “Victoria!” Scarlett read.

  Victoria started jumping up and down. “I’m so excited. I can’t believe it!”

  Mara slumped.

  “Sorry, Mara,” Scarlett said. “It’s not my fault. It was luck.”

  Scarlett swept up all the little pieces of paper and put them in the trash can.

  Poof! Just like that, my dream of going to the concert and winning that ukulele was gone.

  “All right, boys and girls,” Mrs. Brock called out. “Let’s get this day going.”

  Victoria and Scarlett went to their desks.

  Phillip’s forehead wrinkled. “Don’t you guys think it was a little suspicious that Victoria won?” he whispered.

  “Scarlett had her eyes closed when she picked, Phillip,” Resa said. “I watched her.”

  “But what if…?” Phillip looked over at the trash can.

  Mrs. Brock called out. “Phillip, Resa, and Lucy, take your seats.” She turned on The Morning Mix, which is the television news show the fifth graders put on every morning.

  As we sat down, Phillip whispered, “We have to look at those papers!”

  I glanced around the room. There had to be something to throw away. On the floor by Jeremy Bing’s desk was a crumpled tissue. I didn’t really want to touch Jeremy Bing’s nose drippings, but this was important.

  I walked over and picked up the tissue.

  “What are you doing?” Jeremy whispered.

  “Just trying to keep our classroom clean,” I said, and walked over to the trash can. Scarlett gave me a funny look.

  The can was empty except for the Scarlett’s five folded pieces of paper sitting on the bottom. I bent down, put the tissue in the can, and picked up the pieces of paper. I had them in my hand when I heard Phillip say, “Watch out!”