After a final gaze at the moonlit waves, she went inside and locked both her doors. As her head hit the pillow, she imagined Ross holding and kissing her. Even if the reality of this relationship resembled storm-tossed waves dashing against a rocky shore, in her mind all was peaceful and sweet…
Eleven
“I’M going to show you a method I call transformational tarot.” Lenore sat at the round table in her room, to Angie’s left, her smile glowing with peace and patience. “Instead of placing the cards you’ve chosen in a traditional Celtic cross, this exercise puts you in charge. You intuit the story, to create your own happy ending—or at least a positive resolution to the situation you’ve asked about.”
“Like I have a single intuitive bone in my body, or know how to create anything except chaos and conflict,” Angie complained with a roll of her eyes. “Surely you realize that, after the little drama in my room last night—for which I apologize, if I kept you up or disturbed your guests.”
Lenore’s expression remained unfazed. Indeed, the woman’s face glowed more than usual this morning, either because she was amused by last night’s happenings or because her pale rose tunic made her look younger. Angelic and ethereal. “Do tell, dear.”
“Hah! As though you couldn’t hear how Rita pounced on me, hollering her threats! Then Ross came over to smooth my feathers, to swear he was breaking up with her for good.” Angie laughed—at herself, mostly. “I don’t know whom to believe. Or whether I should even participate in their conflict. Who am I, to think I can settle such a volcanic relationship? I’ll get fried alive!”
Lenore’s eyebrows arched. “A perfect question to ask the cards. Let’s consider how to phrase it.”
Baffled, Angie gazed at the woman. Had Lenore not heard a word about the knock-down-drag-out, much less actually heard the fight last night?
“First of all, don’t fall prey to the combative, negative energy Ross and Rita engage in. Here’s how the Law of Attraction works: you get what you give. What goes around, comes around.” Lenore paused to look out her window toward the shore. “If you send out distrust and doubt, that’s what you’ll receive from the universe. For better or for worse, you will perpetuate the emotions and situations you project.”
“Does that mean Rita will never give him up? Because she’ll never stop believing Ross is hers?”
“At least one of them needs to change the energy if things are to go differently.” Lenore smiled sadly. “It’s not like this is the first time Ross has tried to break away, you see. He’s concerned about Rita’s bipolar tendency to fly high and then fall flat, but gentleman that he is, he wants to fix what’s wrong with her.”
“Ah. I’ve been told I’m a fixer, too.”
“And have you succeeded?” Lenore quizzed her gently. “Peacekeeper that you are, Angela, it’s natural for you to seek harmony and balance between people. That doesn’t mean it’s your job, though. As we evolve through our various lives, each of us must learn how to clean up our own messes, and how to let everyone else mop up after themselves.”
She made it sound so easy! Lenore’s slender hands swirled the cards around before she stacked them and handed them over. “What am I supposed to do?” Angie blurted.
“Close your eyes. As you mix the cards, to replace my energy with your own, ask them, ‘How shall I best deal with conflict between Ross and Rita—or with conflict, in general?’ ” she intoned. “When you’ve mixed them to your satisfaction, choose seven.”
Angie did as Lenore said, although it felt odd, talking to cards. After swishing them around she plucked out seven. “Was I supposed to stack them first, like you did?”
“Whatever feels natural. You’re doing fine, dear!” Lenore beamed at her and then turned the seven cards faceup. “And see how these images reflect your energy? Most of the cards are young women, like yourself, with a couple of males in the mix.”
“With dark hair and a beard,” she murmured as she pointed to one. “Like Ross.”
“I like this DruidCraft deck because the facial expressions often tell us more than the traditional meanings of the cards. As you look at them, which card is about conflict?”
Angie tapped the Five of Swords, which showed a scowling man in control of all five swords, with his back to a downcast man who appeared defeated.
“Excellent. Conflict is the crux of our reading, so we’ll surround it with the power of the other cards. Next, choose a card that—for you—signifies a positive resolution.”
She paused then picked a card showing a woman and a man being rowed in a boat. “These two seem to be headed toward a happy ending. And it’s the only card where they’re together…and I would like to be with Ross, when all’s said and done. Maybe it’s not smart, but—”
“But that’s what you feel, so trust your gut.” Her mentor placed that card in front of them on the table. “The Six of Swords is about moving away from the conflict of the Five to a more peaceful place. So see? Once again, your instinct is right on the mark! Now I’ll talk you through this placement as I see it. It’ll be in the shape of a Christmas tree—as evergreens are a symbol of eternal life—and it will script the story so you reach the ending you desire.”
Lenore considered the remaining five cards, then put one at the top, centered two beneath it, and placed the card about conflict between the other two, directly above the couple in the boat. She smiled, nodding. “Perfect synergy, dear. These women could be you! I mean, look at how beautiful and powerful and confident they are. Place yourself inside their pictures, wrap your mind around this without letting reality distract you, all right?”
Angie nodded, lulled by the compelling voice of her mentor.
Lenore draped her arm loosely across the back of Angie’s chair. “We begin at the top, with the Wheel of Fortune, which speaks to the cycle of change. The young woman drawing the circle in the sand around herself is defining her sphere of influence.” She tapped the picture behind the girl. “No such thing as coincidence, remember? This shows you on the beach, designing your new life in Harmony Falls. In ancient wisdom, a beach is the threshold between this world and the next, which means now and what will be. Are you with me so far?”
Angie nodded. Her mind was whirling, yet the story made perfect, wonderful sense.
“And here you are again, venturing forth as the Princess of Wands, intent on your life’s purpose,” her teacher continued with the next row. “And if we assume this Prince of Pentacles is Ross—”
“He’s holding up his shield,” Angie whispered. “Deflecting a power we don’t see, but he’s facing away from the princess. Like he wants to protect her, because she’s walking into a situation unaware of the danger he perceives.”
Lenore hugged her fiercely. “You’re a natural! You’re telling me how this story goes! And on the row of three cards, where I have surrounded the conflict card with the Queen of Wands and Strength, do you notice anything? How do these images make you feel, dear?”
Angie blinked. Both women were brunettes in red dresses, but other than that…
“There are no wrong answers, Angela. But here again, I see you, secure in your power, confident of your abilities to remain outside the conflict in that central card while those two play out their own drama. Because you control your emotions, you can remain untouched by that negativity if you choose to.”
Angie studied the Five of Swords. “That’s about winning by intimidation, isn’t it? Overkill. The guy with all five swords is lording it over the one he’s disarmed.”
“And even though he has won, he doesn’t look happy, really. It’s a victory, but without any triumph.”
Angie gaped. Everything Lenore had said fell magically into place. “So you’re saying that if I, like these two ladies, remain outside the conflict between Rita and Ross, I stand a better chance of being transported to my happy ending with him?”
“Doesn’t that seem more feasible? If you remain in a positive mind-set, determined to be who you are,” Leno
re affirmed, “you have not lost your self. Even if that man doesn’t represent Ross, you’ve written your ticket to a more peaceful place.”
The breath she’d been holding escaped while Angie’s mind drew more parallels. “Works the same way with Gregg, right?” she murmured. “If I believe in my own strength—my right to control my life—I no longer have to be that poor guy in the Five background, hanging his head. Because that’s exactly how I felt after Gregg and I argued. Worthless. Dejected. Nothing at all like these two ladies in red.”
“Bingo,” Lenore whispered proudly. “Red is the color of passion and personal power. And you, my dear, reek of passion and personal power!” She reached for a pad of paper and a pen. “You won’t remember this stuff five minutes from now, so let’s sketch the spread. That way, you can refer back to it, or we can discuss it later to see if our predictions have come to pass.”
“This is totally awesome.” Angie’s palms tingled, and she felt light and hopeful. How had Lenore come to know so much about this stuff? She never got angry or frustrated. Always seemed tuned to a higher wavelength that allowed her to soar effortlessly above the cloud cover most people lived beneath “So how long have you been a tarot reader? And why are you so sure the cards tell the truth?”
Lenore smiled kindly. “I’ve been a student of the tarot since I was about twelve in this lifetime. Before that, in various other eras, I served as a priestess at temples or I was an oracle. I’ve been a male physician, as well. Healing and divination have run through my lifetimes like a golden thread, dear.”
Angie’s jaw dropped. This wasn’t a new topic, but it was the first time she’d discussed it with anyone who gave such precise replies. “So you’re talking about reincarnation? How do you know about those other lifetimes?”
“Most recently, I’ve done past-life regression work with Elliott James. Those of us involved with unseen realms seek each other out during our various incarnations, to help each other evolve beyond who we were before.”
Angie scowled. “We forget who we were? And how do you know you can trust what these…practitioners tell you?”
Lenore restacked her deck. “That ‘forgetting’ is a process our souls undergo as we’re born into a new physical body. We make this agreement with ourselves so we can fully experience the purposes we’ve chosen to learn in this lifetime, without falling back on the vast knowledge we’ve acquired during our soul’s existence.”
She paused with the deck between her hands, her ageless face radiating a serenity Angie envied. “It’s like taking an open-book exam where the answers aren’t given in the back,” Lenore explained. “You have to make your mistakes and messes, and deal with other people’s. That way you learn patience or compassion, or experience disasters and famine and other suffering. Whatever your soul needs to evolve higher and brighter with each lifetime.
“It sounds complicated, but the soul’s system for navigating eternity is really quite simple. And it’s glorious, dear Angela!” Lenore added exuberantly. “Just as Ross works with numbers, the tarot has been my main tool—a method I suspect you’ll take to like a duck does water. So choose a deck that appeals to you.” She gestured at the boxes and silken drawstring bags on the far side of her table. “We’ll get you started on your own voyage of discovery, dear child. The only way to learn what the cards say is to work with them.”
Angie’s head was whirling. She opened a couple of boxes and then, in a gauzy magenta bag, she found a deck with deep, brilliant colors. Some of the people on these cards wore masks and costumes, seemed to have fascinating secrets and motives. “Oh, my,” she breathed.
“The Gilded Tarot is gorgeous. Truly a vehicle for the imagination,” Lenore agreed. “Look the deck over before we do another transformational spread.”
The cards felt cool and slick—or had her temperature risen with her excitement? “I…I could spend all morning gazing at these. Maybe we should get started.”
“That’s a good sign. Hold the deck in your hands for a moment.” Lenore paused, and then spoke in a slower, lower voice. “Close your eyes and bless the deck, Angela. Then ask for divine assistance as you begin your search for truth.”
Any other time this would’ve seemed weird, yet here, at Lenore’s table overlooking the ocean, Angie felt utterly composed. Holy. Ready to take on a whole new realm of information.
“Now, mix them around while you contemplate a question you want answered. Some people shuffle, but I prefer not to crease my cards.”
“I can understand why.” Reverently, Angie turned the deck facedown, mixed the cards with her palms, and then restacked them.
“Now, for clarity’s sake, write your question. It helps you focus on your intention for this reading.”
Angie thought for a moment, then grabbed Lenore’s pen. What will happen next with Ross? she wrote. What should I expect from him?
“Choose seven cards, as seven is the number of mysticism, solitude, and study. Some people choose the seven cards on top, while others choose cards as they mix, or cut the deck each time.”
“Which is better?”
“Whichever feels natural, as long as you use the same method consistently. After you get familiar with a deck and it has absorbed your energy, you’ll be amazed at how the same cards turn up again and again.” Lenore smiled mysteriously, her presence almost surreal in the filtered sunlight. “That’s how you know you’re progressing. And that’s how you know the cards—your interpretations of them—can be trusted.”
Childlike in her excitement, Angie turned her seven cards over as she laid them in a line.
“Take a moment to observe the images. Then we’ll arrange your spread and interpret its response to your question.”
Angie’s heart fluttered. The first card, the Lovers, showed a couple standing in an amorous embrace, thigh-high in the ocean, with the moon’s light bursting into stars around them. This was too cool. Also, too close to the truth about what she wanted with Ross.
“This one goes at the top,” she declared, “because it addresses the question straight on. No doubt in my mind.”
Lenore nodded. She wore a secretive smile as she noted the other cards, which all had a man or a woman on them, except for the Ace of Cups. “An interesting assortment,” she murmured. “Now I’ll be quiet while your intuition simmers.”
“What are you not telling me?” Angie pointed to the Ace, where a large, mystical eye peered over a golden chalice. “What’s this one mean?”
“Aces always signify beginnings. Cups bring us messages about creativity and intuition, or love and emotions.”
“So that one’s my outcome! Because that’s exactly where these feelings between Ross and me are headed: a new beginning.”
“You’re sure of that? Considering the way Rita will stake her claim on him?” Lenore gazed at the cards before purposefully clasping her hands in her lap. “Sometimes we see what we want to see and miss other possible interpretations. But that’s human nature, dear. And it’s your vision.”
What did her mentor mean by that? Angie looked at the other cards and quickly placed the four, five, and six in a row. The remaining cards, a King of Cups and the High Priestess, seemed destined to pair up.
“And what do you see there?” her teacher asked quietly. “I can tell by the way you placed these cards that your inner vision is sharp and clear, even if it’s different from mine. And that’s as it should be.”
“I see this lady in the boat rowing away from the couple in the five card, while the guy in the Four of Cups seems to be…overwhelmed by that giant cup being tipped over him. Like he has to accept something even if he doesn’t want to.”
“Who’s holding the cup?”
“God, probably.”
“Good job. And whose eye is that, gazing at you above the ace of that same cup?”
Angie paused. “God’s, again. So, whatever comes around for Ross and me…God is causing it?”
“You, dear, are creating whatever happens,” Le
nore corrected gently. “But yes, God is always in the picture, watching over this creation. And do you have someone in mind for those roles of King of Cups and that High Priestess who dances above the waters?”
Angie chuckled. “She’s so beautiful, so free. So powerful. She’s who I’d like to be when I grow up, if you get my drift.”
“A worthy role to aspire to. The High Priestess is all about using your intuition and inner knowledge, and about believing in it.” Again Lenore studied the spread, her expression waxing first sentimental and then more serious. “And what do you see as this spread’s overall story?”
“Well, you’ve said fives are about conflict, so I’m thinking that while conflict might come between Ross and me from time to time, probably in the form of Rita, we’ll overcome those obstacles. It’s just meant to be, between us. Ross thinks so, too. It’s in our numbers.”
“Another worthwhile aim. And any time you want another piece of information about cards in a spread, you may draw a clarifying card.”
Angie sat back, studying the woman beside her. “You know things you’re not telling me, don’t you?”
“My experiences are different from yours, dear. Every tarot reader who looked at this spread would view it differently.” Lenore shrugged, making her silvery-white hair shimmer in the sunlight. “I also see things, you know. So my hunches about your cards are different—but not as valid, because we should never forget that you chose the cards, so they reflect your energy. They manifest your thoughts.”
Angie quickly cut the deck again and turned up a card with a rather startling image of a tower being struck by lightning. “Oh, my.”
“The Tower signifies unexpected surprises. Bolts out of the blue.” Lenore nodded, as though this made perfect sense to her. “While the picture looks rather ominous, those surprises can be positive changes, not just disasters or unpleasant shocks to your system.”
“And how do you interpret that? Haven’t I been through enough disasters and changes this week?” Angie asked with a nervous laugh.
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