“Shut up,” he teased. “What’s going on?” He placed a seltzer with lime in front of her. “It must be serious to get you in here on a Sunday. He leaned back to assess her. “Fill me in.”
Ashleigh leaned on her elbows, covering her mouth and nose with both hands, still reeling over her secret decision. “Do you talk to Kellan at all?”
“Yes.”
“Is she…I mean does she…” She didn’t know really what she was trying to get at. There was very little Liam could say that would alter her mind. She supposed she just wanted someone neutral to weigh in. Make sure she hadn’t truly gone off the deep end. She already had weeks of Shauna and Granny urging her to contact Kellan—she knew where they stood. Because of his friendships with both her and Kellan, Liam seemed to be her best chance of Switzerland.
“Kellan misses you, if that’s what you’re asking.”
“She told you that?”
He took a long breath, wiping the bar as he seemed to select his words carefully. “Ash, I saw her the day she left. She came in here…” He held his palms up in surrender. “She was wrecked. I’ve been through actual war with Kellan.” He licked his lips, the gesture adding a heaviness to his sentiment. “This was a whole other level. Since then, I talk to her. We text. She won’t exactly tell me she misses you. But she asks how you are. If you’re okay. I’m no idiot. I can read between the lines.”
Ashleigh nodded, taking it all in. She took a sip of the crisp seltzer, the tartness of the lime hitting her as she swallowed. “I’m going to go there.”
“To Colorado?” He nodded. “Good. Does Kellan know? Did you talk to her?”
“No.”
“Gonna surprise her for the weekend?” His tone didn’t sound as though he thought it was a bad idea. “Nice.”
“Not for the weekend.”
“Huh?”
That detail clearly threw him for a loop, and she knew she needed to explain. “Liam, I made a mess of everything. When I found out about Dara and Zoey—” She stopped herself from saying more, fearing she might have just violated a trust.
“It’s okay—I know. I didn’t before. Then when everything went south with you two, I was confused. Kellan was devastated. Anyway, she filled me in. I basically had to pull it out of her.”
“It’s so much worse than that. Kellan wanted to stay. To figure it out. To figure us out. I pushed her away. I mean, hard. And the thing is, I was just scared. I love her. And God, it scares the pants off me.”
“Heard all about that too.”
“Jerk.” She pulled the straw from her drink and threw it at him, stifling a smile the entire time. “Here I am pouring my heart out, and you’re making jokes about my sex life.”
“Sorry. Sorry.” He waved a white towel.
“The point I’m trying to make is that I don’t know if a weekend will cut it. I want to show her I’m in it for the long haul. I’m going to go out there and prove it to her. I mean, if she’s with someone, I don’t know, I guess I’ll come home. But barring that, I’m going to stay and fight for her.”
“What about school?”
“I just texted my principal on the way over here. We actually have a really good relationship. I was completely honest with her. Told her I need a leave of absence and why. Leaving midsemester isn’t ideal, but I’ve never asked for anything. Not even when I was going through my separation and divorce.” She felt her heart swell at the thought she would see Kellan so soon. “As far as Colorado goes, the speck of research I did indicates that with a few small steps my New York teaching license will be eligible for reciprocity. So hopefully I can line up some subbing work. Until then, there’s private tutoring. Luckily, thanks to my living sitch the last few years, I have some money saved. That helps.”
“Wow. You are doing this.”
“I am.”
“Fuck, I’m going to miss you.”
Ashleigh shrugged. “You never know, I could be back in two weeks, tail between my legs.”
“You won’t be.” Liam shook his head definitively. “She loves you, Ash. I saw it in her. I see it in you.” He seemed sentimental but in a supportive way. “When are you going?”
“My flight’s on Saturday.”
“This Saturday? That’s, like, not even a full week from now.”
“She’s been gone fifty-two days, Liam. It feels like forever.” Ashleigh twisted the drink in her hands, knowing the swiftness of her actions was completely based in emotion. “I thought the pain would dull. But it hasn’t. Not one bit. I don’t want to live without her. Not another week. Not even another day.” She shrugged, still a teensy bit shocked at her own bold moves in the past three hours. “Once I realized that, I put the wheels in motion.”
“Look at you!”
She smiled at his obvious pride. “It may all blow up in my face. I’m going for it anyway.”
“I have to admit, I’m bummed there’s not even time for a farewell party.”
She huffed out a laugh. “I don’t want a party. I just want Kellan. Honestly, the whole time I’d be thinking about her anyway. Wishing she was here.”
“I get it.” He raised his ginger ale to her seltzer. “To going big or going home.”
Ashleigh chewed her bottom lip, considering the poignancy of his words. “It’s a crazy thing.” She took a second to acknowledge the fullness in her heart and the peaceful calm that came with it before meeting his toast midair. “I kind of think I might be doing both.”
Chapter Twenty-six
Kellan stood in front of the lobby coffee bar debating her third cup. The French roast was fresh, she’d just watched it brew in the kitchen, and the jolt of caffeine would definitely give her a needed boost. Even though it was only two in the afternoon, she was shot.
An entire morning as the Desmond’s makeshift concierge always took its toll, but it usually didn’t drain her this much. In all honesty, playing social director was her favorite part of working at the resort. She didn’t mind the other assignments—managing the cleaning staff and the grounds crew—plus learning the business end of operations with her brother. But there was something about being the guests’ initial ambassador to Vail that made her heart smile.
It was fun seeing the awestruck faces of tourists as they spied the mountains and vistas as she guided them on a small walking excursion through the picturesque streets. Their faces lit up with excitement when she gave the nickel tour and clued them in to the secret gems they passed along the way. The secondhand ski shop in case there were odds and ends they’d forgotten. Doyle’s burger joint, an eatery as rustic as it was delicious. She always ended at the Corner Café, a hole-in-the-wall coffee shop that looked like nothing but boasted brews to die for. Their coffee was outrageous.
The only problem was she couldn’t look at it without thinking of Ashleigh. But then, she couldn’t do anything without thinking of Ashleigh.
Wasn’t time supposed to ease the pain?
Almost two months had gone by, and Kellan felt worse than ever. Ashleigh was still in every thought she had. Sappy songs pumping through the hotel sound system reminded her of quiet times together, sweet and romantic. Poppy hits brought back their playful interchange as they frolicked through New York together, laughing and teasing and touching at every turn.
Vail’s local architecture was just math she didn’t know the inner workings of. She imagined Ashleigh hooking her arm through hers as she analyzed the angles of the structures and shops, explaining how the geometric patterns harkened back to ancient design. She could hear Ashleigh’s voice clear as day. Soft and lyrical with the occasional heaviness of her accent coloring words in the cutest way.
That was what was draining her right now. Ashleigh was always in her heart, her mind, her dreams. But this morning, she’d hosted the Sinclairs, a boisterous family who hailed directly from the Bronx. They were funny and nice and so incredibly New York in every word and gesture. Just being in their presence catapulted her back to square one.
Coff
ee. She needed it to burst out of her funk. She checked the date on her watch. Only a couple more weeks, she thought, as she filled a recyclable cup. Come December, she would set her plan in motion.
But fuck, could she really make it until then? Some days, she thought she wouldn’t survive until the next morning, and she’d whip out her phone to check last-minute flights. But she knew she had to be patient. Christmas break meant Ashleigh would be free from school and on vacation. Kellan was dedicated to winning her back, but the brevity of a weekend didn’t show the level of commitment she felt inside. She had botched things with Dara so badly years ago. Giving up and letting her go, not fighting for their friendship. But she’d learned her lesson, and damned if she was going to make that mistake with the love of her life.
Kellan reached for the agave sweetener, letting out an audible sigh that was equal parts optimism and sadness.
“Rough day?”
The familiar accent came from just behind her, and she cursed her entire staff for booking so many New Yorkers at one time. She made a mental note to hide in her suite until they were all gone.
“Something like that.”
She turned around to face the source of her torture and was completely unprepared to see Ashleigh in front of her. She actually did a double take, turning and looking behind her, for what, she wasn’t entirely sure.
“Can I get a cup of coffee too? I’ve been up since before dawn.” Ashleigh uprighted her luggage and moved closer, brushing her arm against Kellan’s as she reached past for a cup.
“Ash…” Kellan was at a true loss. She stuttered and stammered and felt her eyes welling up. “What are you doing here?”
“Well…” Ashleigh bumped her hip into Kellan playfully as she spoke. “I was sitting at home thinking this whole thing is stupid.”
Kellan heard a confidence in her tone that was new and exciting. She felt her blood rush everywhere as Ashleigh depressed the urn’s lever and filled her cup.
“Life is just too damn short to not spend it with the person you’re crazy about. What we had, the way I feel about you…” Ashleigh looked up, and Kellan saw the spirit in her gorgeous blue eyes. “I’m pretty much madly in love with you.” Ashleigh shrugged like it was no big deal, but the rest of her body language said she was dead serious, and it was everything Kellan could do to resist taking her in her arms and kissing her senseless.
“Well, that’s a relief,” she said, placing her half-made coffee aside. She knew she was beaming, her pulse pounding everywhere. She didn’t even try to play it cool.
“I freaked out, Kellan. I don’t know what to say except I’m sorry. The whole Dara and Zoey thing was an excuse for me. I was just so scared.”
“You don’t have to apologize.”
“I do. I pushed you away. I was…terrified.”
Kellan held a hand up to stop her. She wanted to make sure Ashleigh knew that whatever she thought her transgressions were, all was forgiven. All she wanted was Ashleigh in her arms, in her life. “Ash,” she started, but Ashleigh interrupted her.
“Wait.” Ashleigh met her palm and laced their fingers together. “I need to say this.”
As far as Kellan was concerned, Ashleigh didn’t need to say anything. The fact that she had come to Vail was enough. But she gave her the floor just the same.
“I’m organized and nerdy and structured. I like to plan, to schedule.” Kellan saw her struggling to reveal her feelings and it melted her on the spot. She held her hand and let her talk.
“What you did for Dara all those years ago, it’s incredible. A true act of selflessness. I love you more for it, if that’s possible. But because I’m me…” Ashleigh cast her eyes on their linked fingers, giving a gentle caress, and Kellan could feel her energy kick up a notch. “In an ideal world I might have liked a minute to process it all before meeting them. But, honestly, I’ve given it a lot of thought. I don’t have a clue what I would have done in your shoes. All I know is that I don’t want to spend another minute without you.”
Kellan’s heart beat like crazy at the words, and she was dying to interrupt and proclaim she felt the exact same way, but Ashleigh was still talking.
“So I’m here to beg you to forgive me for telling you to leave, to plead with you to take me back, to fight for you if I have to.”
“There’s going to be no fighting or begging or anything like that.” Kellan’s body was on fire. Her heart felt like it could burst. She ran her fingers along Ashleigh’s forearm, the deliberate touch electrifying her with the mix of desire and familiarity. “Can I kiss you yet?”
Ashleigh looked at her with so much love that she didn’t need to verbalize a response, but she did. “You better.”
Kellan took her face in her hands, placing a soft, tender kiss on her lips. She repeated the gesture over and over, feeling all her emotions rise to the surface. She pulled Ashleigh into her arms and held her tight. “I love you, Ash. So much. Thank you for coming here.”
“Maybe I should have called. I wanted to prove to you that I’m in this for real.” When Kellan looked down, she could see that Ashleigh was wiping away tears. “I realize you have a life, that you might not be ready for me to burst right in to it—”
Kellan laughed out loud. “You’re kidding, right? You’re all I think about. Day and night.” It floored her that Ashleigh could even consider that she wouldn’t want her twenty-four seven, and she wanted her to know it. “I spend every waking minute trying to fix this, figure out a way to win you back. I had a whole game plan concocted for December.”
“You did?”
“Yes.” She tamped down the emotions threatening to spill over. “I wanted to show you—you’re it for me. Because you are. I figured if I came at Christmas, you’d be off from school and we could spend some real time together.”
“We’ll have plenty of time together now.” Ashleigh giggled, but Kellan didn’t get the joke.
“Wait.” She assessed the multitude of bags a few feet away. “How long can you stay?”
“Funny story,” Ashleigh said. “I was kind of hoping…forever?” She shrugged in the most adorable way, and even though Kellan was confused, she felt her body react with an insane amount of happiness.
“What…what does that mean?”
“This is where your life is. Your family. Your job. Kids need to learn math everywhere. I have a few private tutoring interviews lined up. I’m looking into openings in the high school programs for the fall. I want to be where you are. I need to.”
“Are you serious?” she asked, already nervous that it was too good to be true. She must be misunderstanding.
Ashleigh nodded confirmation through an adorable grimace. “Too much?”
“Oh my God, I love you.” Kellan held Ashleigh and kissed her face, swaying her in her arms, her tears spilling out into Ashleigh’s beautiful blond hair. “I love you. I love you. I love you. You could never be too much.” She choked back the rest of her emotions. “Come on, let’s get you settled in.” Kellan started to guide her down the hall, but she felt Ashleigh’s resistance.
“I didn’t even check in yet.”
“You made a reservation?”
“Not here, actually. There were no vacancies this weekend. And I didn’t want to assume anything.”
Kellan couldn’t fight the laughter in her chest. “I’m confused.”
“I did everything last minute. The flights were easy, well, because Granny sends me airline updates twice a week. But lodging, I didn’t really plan ahead. There was nothing available here at the Desmond. So I booked the Marriott a few blocks away.”
“You did what?” Kellan faked horror. “Unacceptable. Good thing the manager there is a friend of mine. I’ll reach out and cancel your room.”
“Kellan, I don’t want to impose. I realize I just got here, and you might want some time to adjust.”
Kellan shook her head, smiling the whole time. “You’re here. I don’t want to spend another night without you. Ever.” She s
hrugged, knowing her heart was fully on her sleeve. “Plus, how’s it going to look if I introduce my parents to my girlfriend and then tell them she’s staying with the competition?”
“Your girlfriend, huh?”
“My uber-structured, spontaneous girlfriend who moved to Colorado on a whim. Is that better?”
“I love it. I love you.”
“Come on.” Kellan picked up her carry-on and draped her arm over Ashleigh’s shoulder, then led the way down the corridor to her corner suite. “I’ll have one of the guys bring the rest of your bags to my room. We need a minute alone so I can kiss you for real. I missed you like crazy.”
Ashleigh didn’t wait. She leaned up and planted a kiss on her cheek. “Good news, though. I’m here now. We have all the time in the world.”
Kellan stopped in front of her door and opened it. She held out her arm for Ashleigh to step in first when it hit her.
“Wait one sec.” She placed Ashleigh’s bag to the side of the open doorway. “Let’s do this the right way.”
Kellan scooped Ashleigh into her arms, leaning in and kissing her with all the love in her body and soul. Without another word, she held her gaze and carried her across the threshold, right into the rest of their lives.
Epilogue
Five Years Later
“You know, I never typed up a summer agenda.”
Ashleigh stood on the stoop assessing the tree-lined Brooklyn street as Kellan slipped the key into the lock and opened the front door of their temporary abode.
Kellan looked over her shoulder, mouth jokingly agape. “Oh, no. Does that mean…spontaneity is in my future?” She held the door open, and Ashleigh poked her in the abdomen as she walked past. She absolutely adored when Kellan teased her, and she would take any excuse to touch her.
“You like my schedules and you know it.” She dropped her luggage on the parquet floor of the sun-filled antechamber. “This is nice.”
“I don’t like your schedules.” Kellan hugged her from behind, clearly not ready to move on. “I love them. I love you.” The sincerity in Kellan’s voice made her swoon, and it was hardly tempered by the heat she felt when Kellan dropped a few baby kisses while ushering them into the living room. “So much that I might have even made a tiny list of my own.”
Brooklyn Summer Page 25