When he poured out a measure of whisky for her, Ainsley lifted an eyebrow at the small amount.
He lifted one in return. “Need a spot of liquid courage, do we?”
“Is it that obvious?”
“You hid your nerves very well, but your mother’s letter rattled you.”
Royal poured her an extra splash. After retrieving his own glass, he then propped his broad shoulders against the mantelpiece and commenced studying her with a thoughtful frown.
Ainsley had to admit he appeared rather intimidating as he loomed over her with his brooding demeanor, tall and impossibly brawny. But even if he did look like a Highland brigand, he could never frighten her. She knew his heart, and it held more generosity and love than a woman like her had any right to expect.
She gave him what she hoped was a serene smile before taking a fortifying sip of whisky.
Royal continued to study her, obviously waiting her out. But when it came to keeping secrets, she was equally adept.
Finally, he let out a small sigh. “I don’t wish to pry, love—”
“Oh, of course you do. You’re a terrible busybody. All the Kendricks are.”
He flashed a quick grin. “True, but we always have everyone’s best interests at heart, including yours. Especially yours.”
“I do know that, and I’m grateful.”
“But?”
“But . . . nothing. My mother caught me up on our family’s affairs, and that’s all.”
“That’s all?” he echoed, more than slightly incredulous.
She simply shrugged.
“Even Angus could tell you were distressed,” he said, “and he’s about as sensitive as a stag in rut.”
Ainsley practically choked on her drink. “Thank you for putting that appalling image in my brain.”
“Made to underline my point.”
He took the glass from her hand and plunked it down on the table. Then he grasped her chin and tilted it up. Ainsley thought about bristling, but then reminded herself that she was here to seduce, not to argue. And his gaze was so warm and understanding, his smile so tender, that any ire faded away. It was hard to bristle when a man loved you so much and constantly put your needs ahead of his own.
Since he was also as sharp as the point of a javelin, she’d best parcel out at least a bit of the truth or he might get too suspicious.
“Very well,” she admitted. “I was upset.”
He briefly cupped her cheek before dragging over a padded ottoman from beside the hearth. Placing it in front of her, he settled onto it, wincing a bit as he stretched out his leg.
“Won’t you tell me about it?” he quietly asked.
She nodded. “Her letter was quite cold. I’m not used to that from her. Mamma always doted on me.”
“Both your parents did, as I recall.”
“They did,” she said, feeling a bit wistful. “I was the baby of the family and the only girl. So, it makes sense, I suppose.”
“Not to mention you are beautiful, funny, and sweet.”
She widened her eyes at him. “Royal Lancelot Kendrick, you should not tell such plumpers. I was never sweet.”
He leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to her mouth. He lingered for a few moments, letting his tongue slip a fraction between her lips. As soon as she started to respond, he pulled back, his gaze smoky with desire.
“One can be tart and sweet at the same time,” he said.
“You make me sound like a cherry pie.”
“An exceedingly apt analogy, pet. But getting back to that letter—”
She slid a slow, teasing tongue over her upper lip, hoping to distract him. “Perhaps you might like another sample, just to check.”
When he gently traced the outline of her lip, Ainsley’s heart gave a hard thump.
“I will make a note so as not to lose my place,” he said. “But first tell me more about your mamma’s letter.”
She sighed. “Oh, very well. As I mentioned, she informed me of my sister-in-law’s pregnancy, but also said that I was not to expect further updates, especially not from my brother. Or from either of my brothers or their families, in fact. According to Mamma, they’re all mortified and disgusted by my selfish behavior.”
“Your brothers sound like a pair of stupid prats, if you ask me.”
“You’re sadly correct in that assessment.”
“Then why does their disapproval trouble you? As far as I’m concerned, they’re beneath your notice.”
“Perhaps, but my sisters-in-law are quite nice, and I do hate the idea of never seeing any of my nieces and nephews again.”
Royal frowned. “Even your family must eventually become reconciled to our marriage. At that point, you can try reestablishing relations.”
“It doesn’t matter,” she said, forcing a smile. “I have all the family I need. I don’t think I could manage both mine and the Kendricks, to tell you the truth.”
“Of course it matters,” he replied. “I know how much this hurts you, Ainsley, and I’m deeply sorry for it.”
He was right. Her family’s rejection had been a dagger blow to the heart. Even though she’d known it would be the likely outcome, such a comprehensive break was still shocking. Only by acceding to their demands could she possibly return to their good favor. That she could never do, for a hundred reasons starting with the man sitting before her.
“Would you like Nick to write to your parents?” he added. “A letter from the Earl of Arnprior might help, especially if he employs his most imperious, high-stickler manner. Your parents would like that—a message from one snob to another, as it were.”
“God, no! He can’t ever write to them, and neither can you.”
When Royal’s eyebrows shot up, she mentally cursed her blunder. But it would be fatal if any of the Kendricks communicated with her parents. Then the whole sordid mess would surely come out, and Royal, along with the rest of his family, would likely toss her out onto the street.
“I mean, it’s very nice of you to offer,” she amended, trying to smile, “but I’m convinced it would do no good, and might only make matters worse.”
When his gaze narrowed suspiciously, Ainsley felt heat creeping into her face.
“What aren’t you telling me?” he asked.
“Nothing!”
He made a frustrated sound under his breath. “Ainsley, I truly wish you would trust me. I cannot help you unless you do.”
“Of course I trust you, Royal. With everything, including Tira.”
Well, everything but the whole truth, which made her feel like a vile worm. But complete honesty at this point would only benefit Cringlewood.
He drew back and crossed his arms over his chest. “You certainly have an odd way of showing it.”
That stung. “You kept your secrets, as I recall. I had to push to get you to share them.”
“And as I recall, share I did.”
She’d walked right into that one.
Better find a way to walk out of it.
“Royal, it’s just that . . .”
“Yes?”
Ainsley could sense him retreating even further, and she hated that. Hated feeling like there were still so many obstacles between them. Maybe it wouldn’t be so awful to tell him part of it. After all, it was a simple statement of fact, and one he’d probably thought about already.
She looked down and began fiddling with her wedding ring. “It’s just that it’s embarrassing to discuss.”
Royal covered her hand with his, stilling her fidgets. “More embarrassing than Angus walking in on us while we were having sex?”
She glanced up with a rueful smile. “We weren’t actually having relations at that precise moment.”
“Close enough.”
“This is a different kind of embarrassing.”
He held her gaze, steadfastly waiting her out. This time it worked.
“It’s the Scottish marriage laws,” she said reluctantly. “They’re quite different from Eng
land’s.”
“Yes, everyone knows that, but what does that—” He clamped his mouth shut.
“I know. It’s awful,” she said, taking in his disgusted expression. “I didn’t wish to trouble you with it.”
“They want us to divorce,” he said in a flat tone.
She nodded.
“On what grounds?”
“Divorce on grounds of desertion takes too long, apparently. So, Mother thinks adultery is the most expedient choice.”
Anger sparked in his gaze. “Are they truly mad enough to think I would ever betray you like that?”
She twirled a finger. “It would be the other way around.”
“You’re supposed to betray me?”
“As Mamma so kindly pointed out, under those conditions the process only takes six weeks.” She hated even saying the ugly, hurtful words. “And you would no doubt be so disgusted with me that you would file for divorce without any more prompting.”
“What about the scandal? Do they not realize how it would affect your reputation?”
“I suppose they think the scandal will fade over time,” she said evasively. “My family is rich, after all.”
When he fell silent, Ainsley had to resist the temptation to fidget again.
“And where does Tira enter into this?” he finally asked.
“She doesn’t, at least if Mamma has her way. The Kendricks could keep her, with no one the wiser.”
Ainsley couldn’t bring herself to meet Royal’s gaze. All she could do was stare at their interlaced hands and listen to the thud of her heart.
“Just one more question,” he said.
Ainsley mentally braced herself. She’d already revealed too much. More would surely be fatal.
When she glanced up, her stomach pitched sideways. He looked furious enough to leap onto a horse and ride pell-mell to London to confront her parents in person.
“Yes?” she whispered.
“Does anyone in your family even know you? Does your mother really think you would divorce me and abandon your daughter? They’re idiots if they think you would ever leave Tira again.”
The sickening twist of tension in her gut started to unspool. While her family might not understand her, Royal did. He always did.
“In all fairness, only Mamma knows about Tira. But, yes, I take your point.”
“And why the hell would you expose yourself to that kind of scandal? I may not be a prime catch on the marriage mart, but my family is respectable and well regarded. Divorce makes no sense at all.”
It made more sense than one would think, when one knew all the particulars.
“Maybe my parents heard about the twins,” she said, trying to make a joke of it.
He simply scowled at her.
Ainsley sighed. “That’s why I didn’t wish to tell you. It’s quite awful.”
“Your whole family is both crazed and awful.” His expression softened as he studied her. “I understand why you didn’t want to tell me, but I’m glad you did. Thank you.”
The tension unspooled ever more, and she felt like she could breathe again. “You’re welcome. And thank you for understanding.”
He cupped her chin again. “I will always understand, love. Or at least give it my best effort. I promise.”
What had she ever done to deserve him? The guilt was surely going to kill her.
“Thank you,” she managed.
“You’re welcome. But if you had no intention of telling me all this, why did you come to my room in the first place?”
Finally, the perfect opening.
She slipped her hands to his chest, curling her fingers in the soft linen of his shirt. “I came for this, silly man.” Stretching up, she feathered a kiss across his lips. “I came for you.”
Chapter Twenty-Two
If not for her nerves, Ainsley might have laughed at the stunned look on her husband’s face. As it was, her stomach was doing handsprings. She couldn’t decide whether kissing Royal was delicious or nerve-racking.
Of course, it was a combination of both, with the scales weighted in favor of delicious. So delicious, in fact, she’d best kiss him again.
When she moved closer, he grasped her shoulders and held her back.
“Hang on, lass,” he said, his brogue growing thick. “Are you saying what I think you’re saying?”
She sighed. Seducing her husband was turning out to be surprisingly hard work. “Do I really have to explain it?”
Amusement warred with heat in his gaze. “Just to be on the safe side.”
“What does that mean?”
“Ainsley, I’m about one minute away from flinging you onto that bed and having my wicked way with you, preferably all night. I simply want to be sure we’re on the same page about this. If not, tell me now.”
She loved him for being so careful with her, but the time for caution was past. Grabbing his side whiskers, she tugged his head down until they were nose to nose.
“Ouch,” he said.
“Don’t be such a baby. I’m not hurting you in the least.”
“I’ll have you know I’m very sensitive to pain. Ask anyone.”
“Ha. You’re the most stoic person I’ve ever met. Insanely so.”
“You’re too kind, madam. Now, why are you tugging so fiercely on my whiskers?”
“Because I want you to listen to me and truly understand what I’m saying.”
His gaze softened. “Love, I always listen to you.”
“You do, but sometimes you don’t hear what I’m saying. You hear what you think I’m saying.”
“Now you’ve lost me.”
“Then let me explain in terms you might understand. It’s midnight, everyone else is in bed, and I’ve snuck into your room dressed only in my nightclothes.”
“There wasn’t much sneaking. Barging in would be more accurate.”
“Stop quibbling,” she said, tugging again on his whiskers.
The laugh lines deepened around his eyes. “My apologies, wife. So, you’re saying that you crept into my bedroom because you want me to seduce you?”
“No, because I want to seduce you .”
His lips curled up in a slow smile. “Even better. I’m quite fond of nubile young women trying to seduce me, especially when I’m married to them.”
“As I mentioned in our last encounter of this nature, there are to be no more nubile young women but me. Not ever. Are we agreed?”
“Love, you’re almost more nubile than I can manage. Any more and I’d likely perish on the spot.”
“Dear me, is that a compliment? If so, it’s a rather obscure one.”
“Then allow me to show you exactly what I’m thinking.” He stroked her neck, brushing aside the triple layers of lace flowing down from her collar. “Good God. How am I to find you under all this fabric? It’s worse than a dandy’s cravat.”
Ainsley was too busy shivering at the play of his fingers over her collarbone to giggle. He reached for the ribbon that tied shut the top of her wrapper, tugging on it and slowly slipping it free of its knot.
“I’m sure you’ll manage just fine,” she said in a breathless voice.
His hand stilled. “Are you still seducing me, or is it now the other way around?”
Exasperated, she batted his hand away. “Royal, I’m beginning to think you don’t want me in your bed after all.”
He took her hand and pressed it over his heart. Underneath the fine weave of his shirt, she could feel its hard thump.
“Ainsley, you are my heart,” he said. “I want you so much I can hardly breathe.”
“Then why are you acting like a virgin on her—or his—wedding night?”
“Because this is turning out to be our wedding night—our real wedding night. So, yes, I’m a little nervous.”
She stretched up and kissed his cheek, her tongue slipping out to taste his faintly salty, bristled skin.
“Don’t be,” she whispered as she kissed her way along the slashing line of
his jaw. “I promise to be gentle.”
She felt the husky rumble of his laugh as she caressed his chest. But then he curled his fingers around her shoulders, pushing her back a few inches.
“Now what?” she yelped.
“You’ve been avoiding me for the last several days, so why now?”
Drat the man. He was much too perceptive for his own good.
“I’m tired of this halfway between sort of marriage,” she replied. That, at least, was the truth. “And I think you are as well.”
“I will take whatever you can give me, Ainsley. But you know I want more.” He rolled his lips inward, as if struggling to keep in the words. “I want everything.”
“So do I. I . . . I love you, Royal.” Her words echoed the stuttering of her heart. “And I want to be with you, as a woman wants to be with the man she loves.”
His hands tightened on her shoulders. “You love me?”
“I know it seems rather sudden, but it’s been coming on for quite some time.” She gave him a weak smile, feeling foolish. “Rather like a case of the sniffles that doesn’t seem to want to go away, no matter what you do.”
A grin, dazzling in its intensity, transformed his solemn expression into one of joy. “I have been waiting for those words for a very long time, my lady.”
He stood and pulled Ainsley to her feet.
“You’ve been waiting for me to make a stupid joke about sniffles and loving you?”
Royal swept her into his arms with a dramatic flourish. “It was the perfect thing to say. You’re generally most truthful when you’re insulting me.”
“Oh, dear,” she said. “I am the worst wife in Scotland. Probably England, too.”
He plopped her on the edge of the bed, then leaned down and planted his hands on either side of her thighs.
“You’re the perfect bride for me, my angel.”
She rested her hands on his shoulders. “Truly?”
“I am yours, Ainsley. Now and forevermore.”
His quiet declaration made her throat go tight. All she could muster was a misty smile.
“Now,” he said. “May we commence with the mutual seduction?”
“Yes, please.”
When he started to untie her wrapper, Ainsley brushed his hands away. “Let me do it.”
She pulled her legs onto the bed and rolled up into a kneeling position. Her heart was pounding so hard it made her lightheaded, but she didn’t care. Despite the ugly images that still lurked in the darkest corners of her mind, she wanted this. She wanted Royal with a need that made her insides tremble.
The Highlander Who Protected Me (Clan Kendrick #1) Page 33