by Laura Pavlov
“What would we have done?” she asked.
I chuckled. “What do you think, G?”
“So, you admit that you want it to happen?”
“I’ve never denied that I’m attracted to you.” She moved closer, her body rubbing against mine and my dick was enjoying every minute of it.
“But you don’t want to give it a chance because of Cade?”
“It’s more than that, but yes, he’s a huge factor. The dude is like a brother. And your family—they’ve been so good to me. But aside from that, I’m not good for you, and we both know it. I’ll fuck it up and everything will be weird after that. And for what? So we can scratch an itch? You really want to play with fire like that?”
Her head cocked to the side, and my breath lodged in my throat. I’d woken up with my fair share of girls over the years, and none had ever looked like this in the morning. Gigi Jacobs was gorgeous with no makeup, hungover after puking her brains out, looking at me like she had all the faith in the world in me.
Her hair was a wild mess splayed out on my pillow.
“What if I’m not good enough for you? Did you ever think of that?”
I ran my fingers through her hair because I couldn’t help myself and I laughed. “No. Because we both know that’s not true. Everything about you is good.”
“Why are you so hard on yourself?” she whispered, and her fingers grazed my jaw, and I closed my eyes as I reveled in her touch.
“Because it’s easy.”
“I think that needs to change starting now.” Her nose rubbed against mine and it took every ounce of restraint not to kiss her. “Does my breath smell like puke?”
“You used my toothbrush and mouthwash last night, so your breath smells minty. And how do you always manage to smell like peaches?”
She smiled and bit down on her plump bottom lip. “It’s my lotion. You noticed that, huh?”
“I did. Peaches are my favorite fruit.” I tugged her closer, wrapping both of my arms around her because I needed to feel her, but was wrestling with how badly I wanted her.
“Why does my head feel like it might explode?” Her breath tickled my chest as she spoke.
“You’ve got yourself an award-winning hangover.” I chuckled and my phone vibrated on my nightstand. I pulled back, assuming it was a sign from God to put some space between us. “It’s Wren. I need to take this.”
She nodded and sat up in bed. My T-shirt was pooled around her, and she looked cute as hell as she tried to comb through her hair with her fingers.
“Hey, what’s up?”
“I’m sorry to do this to you, Gray, but your dad was here last night, and he placed some hefty bets on a few fights that I’m guessing he can’t cover.” Wren owned a warehouse where underground local fights took place. “These are not guys that he wants to mess around with. He took off and I can’t find him. But if they find him first, it won’t be pretty.”
Good Christ.
Could the man not get his shit together for one minute? Just see through the program at rehab.
Do better.
It was exhausting.
I scrubbed a hand down my face. “All right. I’ll get in the car now. I know where to look for him. Do you know how much he owes?”
“No. But if you could get him back in the program, they won’t be able to touch him there, and we could figure out how to get him out of this mess in the meantime.” Wren had been a good friend to my father, and I was thankful he still had someone looking out for him. He’d burned every other bridge in Willow Springs.
“I’m on my way,” I said, pushing to my feet and ending the call.
“What happened?” Gigi asked, and her gaze zeroed in on my morning wood, which was more prominent than ever. My dick would have to sit his ass down. I had to deal with my dad’s shit per usual. Exactly why this girl did not want to get mixed up with me.
“My dad’s in some trouble. I need to go home for the night. Fuck. I don’t want Simon to find out he fucked up yet again. Jesus, this is a never-ending nightmare.” I dropped to sit on my bed and ran my hands through my hair.
She moved beside me and wrapped her little arms around me and somehow managed to offer more comfort than anyone else ever had in just the small gesture. “I’m going with you. You don’t need to do this alone.”
“The hell you are.” I pushed to my feet. “This is why we can’t fuck around with this, G. You don’t need to be brought down with my shit.”
She pushed to her feet and pulled the T-shirt over her head, showing me her perfect tits and causing me to groan. She slipped on her bra and tugged the blue blouse over her head, before shimmying into the little jean skirt she’d worn last night. “You’re not the boss of me, Gray. And whether you never want to act on this...” She motioned her hand between us. “Whatever this is. I’m still your friend, and I’m going with you.”
She dropped to sit and slipped her ankle booties on and hurried to the bathroom to splash some water on her face. I pulled on my jeans and tugged a T-shirt and hoody over my head. I didn’t have time to argue with her, or maybe I just liked the idea of her coming with me.
I shouldn’t.
It wasn’t a good idea to get tangled up with Gigi Jacobs, but I didn’t know how to stop it.
It was an unfamiliar force that I’d never experienced in my life, and I didn’t have time to dissect it.
“You ready?” she asked.
I rumpled the top of her head and pulled the door open. “When did you get so stubborn?”
“It only comes out when I’m dealing with you.” She laughed as she followed me into the kitchen. Francie wasn’t there yet, and the place was a fucking disaster. Ricky came around the corner holding a broom. Damn, the kid was as dependable as it gets. I grabbed us two bananas and a muffin and wrapped it in a paper towel and handed it to Gigi.
“Dude, I have a family situation I need to deal with. You’re in charge. Anyone gives you shit, you call me and I’ll talk to them.”
“You got it. Hey.” He smiled at Gigi and his cheeks flamed red. I tried not to laugh. I got it. She was fucking beautiful. It was a fair reaction.
“Hi,” she said with a wave, as I grabbed two water bottles, and placed my hand on her lower back to lead her out of the house.
“The dude has a major crush on you,” I whispered in her ear as I pulled open the passenger door for her. She climbed in and I reached over to buckle her seat belt.
She slapped my hand away. “I know how to buckle myself, Gray.”
I shrugged. I liked doing things for her. I jumped in the driver’s seat and started the truck. “Sure you want to come with me? Last chance to get dropped off at your dorm.”
“Nice try. I’m coming with you. We can stay at my house tonight. My parents are in Maui.” She crossed her arms over her chest, proud that she was solving all my problems for me. I didn’t want to have to stay at my mom’s house and tell Simon why I’d come home for the night. Staying at the Jacobs’ was a good idea.
“You’ve just got it all figured out, don’t you?” I asked as I merged onto the freeway.
“Most of the time.” She shrugged. “Tell me about your dad. I know your parents split up when you were young, but I don’t know much about him.”
I let out a long breath. Maybe it was good for her to hear about all the shit that was part of my life. Like it or not, my dad was a part of me.
“He’s a great guy when he isn’t fucked up, which unfortunately isn’t often lately. He was such a good dad when I was young. He got in an accident and got hooked on pain killers, and it’s been a vicious cycle ever since.”
She nodded. “Is he still hooked on pills?”
“Well, now he’s hooked on everything. Booze. Pills. Gambling. Who knows what else the dude has going on.”
“How does that make you feel?” Her v
oice was soft, and I glanced over at her. The look in her eyes made my chest squeeze. No one ever asked how I felt about the shit with my father, or the divorce, or the fact that my stepfather was a complete prick.
“It’s fine.”
“You don’t need to say you’re fine for me. He’s your dad. It wouldn’t be normal if this didn’t hurt you or fill you with worry.”
I let out a long breath. “It sucks. He’s my dad. Everyone talks shit about him in town, including that asshole, Simon. My mom doesn’t want to talk about it because it’s too painful, so I only have my grandparents and Wren that still hold out hope that he can come out of this.”
She moved to the center seat in my truck and buckled herself in before reaching for my hand in my lap. My shoulders stiffened but I didn’t pull away.
“Addiction is brutal. He’s very lucky he has you in his corner. If I had to have anyone in my corner, I’d want it to be you,” she said.
“Is that because you saw my manhood?” I teased, still finding it humorous that she wouldn’t say dick or cock or even penis.
“I mean, it doesn’t hurt the argument.” Her cheeks pinked and she laughed. “But, no. It’s because you’re strong and resilient. I’ve known you my entire life, and you don’t let things stop you. You just push through and keep on trying, and I think it’s admirable. Most people would fall apart if they were dealing with all this.”
I squeezed her hand. “Don’t give me too much credit. I don’t really have a choice, right?”
“You always have a choice, Gray. Your mom walked away. Most of his friends walked away. You made a choice to stand by him, and he’s lucky to have you.”
“When did you get so wise?”
“I was born this way,” she said, and a wide grin spread across her face.
We spent the rest of the drive talking and laughing and sharing things we’d never shared before. Like the fact that we’d both never had a serious relationship—but for different reasons. Gigi hadn’t found anyone she cared about that way, her words not mine, and I’d never met anyone who made me want to stop banging other girls, my words not hers.
She wanted to be an artist because she liked creating things, she loved her best friends and had her entire life, and her family meant everything to her. She wanted to be a mom someday but wanted to have a career of her own because her mother never did, and she didn’t want to regret not filling those needs first. She loved Cade but didn’t appreciate that he treated her like a little kid because she was a grown woman. I laughed when she said it because she was so worked up—but she was right. She wasn’t a little girl anymore, and her brother needed to respect that.
Hell, I needed to respect it too.
Although I’d been fantasizing about her for a while now, but that was different.
I pulled up at Dad’s apartment, because Wren thought he might be hiding out there, but he hadn’t picked up the phone nor answered the door when he’d tried to reach him. I had a key, so if he was there, I was going to haul his ass back to rehab. I let Wren know I was close, and he was meeting us over here.
Again.
“You wait in the car,” I said when I stepped out, but I heard her door shut behind me. “What are you doing?”
“You might need backup. You don’t know what you’re walking into.”
I rolled my eyes as she followed me up the cement stairs. “Anyone ever told you that you’re exhausting?”
“Only you,” she said, pausing to stand beside me at the door.
Dad lived on the second story of a sketchy duplex. I was fairly certain the people downstairs were porn stars because I always heard moaning when I came here, and there were dudes with cameras coming in and out of the place.
Shady as fuck. I hated that this was where he lived. He’d lived with my grandparents for a while, but he didn’t like them knowing when he came and went—which is code for fell off the wagon.
My father had had it all at one time. We’d lived in a gorgeous house on the lake when I was young, he was practicing law, and my mom and dad had always seemed happy together. At least that’s the memory that’s stayed with me.
I knocked on the door and listened for any movement.
Nothing.
I pulled out my keys and we both jumped when a car door slammed from the parking lot and I looked over to see Wren making his way up the stairs.
“Did you knock?” he asked.
“Yeah. I don’t hear anything, but that doesn’t mean he isn’t in there.” I put the key in the door and pushed it open. “Dad,” I called out.
Wren moved me to the side and stepped in first. “Let me check the place out first.”
I knew why he’d met me over here. I wasn’t stupid. If my father continued down this path, there’d come a day where we’d find him lying facedown on the floor. Wren didn’t want me to see that.
“You shouldn’t have come,” I said, looking down at Gigi. This ugliness was not a part of her world, nor should it be.
“Stop being dramatic,” she said. “You’re not getting rid of me, you stubborn ass.”
I closed my eyes and looked up at the ceiling when Wren called for us to come in from the back room. “He’s all right.”
Relief engulfed me, and I let out a breath I hadn’t even realized I’d been holding.
“Come on.” I reached for her hand and led her into his room.
It smelled like trash and stale booze and misery. My dad was slumped in the corner of his room with his face buried in his hands.
“I’m sorry, son. I fucked up.”
It wasn’t the first time, nor would it be the last time. But I dropped Gigi’s hand and moved in front of him, bending down to meet his gaze.
His eyes were dilated and lost and lonely.
A reminder that I never wanted to be here myself. I’d always avoided drugs at all costs, and this would be a forever reason to continue down that path. And booze had become an escape for me, and I needed to remember that.
I never wanted to be here.
“Can we get you back to get the help you need, Dad?” I’d seen a therapist over the years to deal with being the child of an addict as well as attended more Al-Anon meetings than I could count, and I knew better than to get angry at him right now. My father was drowning in addiction. Putting him on the defense would only make him run. I’d been in touch with his counselor at the facility and they were willing to take him back.
“Yeah. I’m sorry, Gray.” He glanced up and focused on Gigi. “Who’s this?”
“This is my friend Gigi,” I said, offering him a hand but he didn’t take it.
“Pretty girl.”
The door flew open behind us and we all startled, with the exception of my father. Two shady-looking motherfuckers strolled in the apartment, and I moved to stand in front of Gigi on instinct. My hand found hers behind me and I knew she was frightened. I cursed myself for bringing her here.
“Who the fuck are you?” my father snarled, and Wren moved toward the two men.
“I told you I’d get back to you when I found him,” Wren hissed and glanced over at me, and the look he gave me made the hair on the back of my neck stand on edge.
This was not good.
“Well, it looks like you found him.” The dude with two sleeves of tats on his arms said, staring at me and craning his neck to see Gigi.
Jesus Christ. I’d fucked up big-time bringing her here.
“He doesn’t have the cash. He’ll get it. Give him a few days.” Wren crossed his arms, standing tall and bowing up just enough for me to notice.
We might throw down right here, and what the fuck would Gigi do?
“Time is money. He’s going to pay more with each passing day, and if he doesn’t pay up, we’ll find other ways to make him pay,” the other guy said. He had a scruffy beard and stood maybe an inch sho
rter than me, and his eyes were filled with hate.
“Get the fuck out of here. You’ll get your money soon.” My father was on his feet and waggling a gun in front of his face and all the air left my lungs.
“Fuck, Dylan. Put that down.” Wren moved beside my father.
“Get the fuck out of here or I’ll blow your fucking heads off! You’ll have your money by the end of the week.” Dad had lost all reason, and he looked like a madman, swinging his pistol and raging.
Gigi had buried her face in my back and her hands fisted my hoody. I had one hand behind me, holding her there.
“All right, man. You’ve got a week, with interest. You’ve got our number, Wren.” They turned on their heels and left, and I stood there staring at my father in shock.
“What the actual fuck, Dad? Have you lost it?” I shouted, pulling Gigi in front of me and wrapping my arms around her.
Wren took the gun from my father and hurried to the door and locked it.
“These guys are not fucking around, Dylan. And now they’ve seen your fucking kid. This is not good.” Wren paced in front of me and my stomach wrenched.
“I’ll get the money. Don’t worry about it. I’ll go back to rehab and I’ll clean my shit up. I’m sorry, Gray.” It was the most coherent he’d been since I’d gotten there.
Yeah, putting others in danger had a way of sobering his ass up apparently.
“Listen to me, Gray. I’ll take him back and get him squared away in his program. You just go back to school and I’ll keep you posted.”
“What about the money?”
My father walked to his dresser and pulled open the drawer. He reached his hand inside and moved it around before taking out a box. He handed it to Wren. “This will cover it.”
When Wren opened the box, my father’s Rolex was inside.
“I thought you hawked it with everything else a long time ago?” I asked, unable to contain my anger now. Gigi’s cheek rested on my chest and I kept her close. She hadn’t said a word, but I was fairly certain she was either in shock or too terrified to speak.
“It’s the one thing I kept because I wanted to pass it down to you. The last fucking thing I have to my name.” He lost it. Tears streaked down his face and he dropped to the floor, slumping against the wall. I felt nothing. He wanted sympathy about a piece of fucking jewelry when he’d failed his family in every way? I couldn’t muster any today. Not after what he’d just pulled.