They could be in other rooms. You don’t know. What do you know?
I felt my way along the wall, leaning heavily against it for support. Empty bottles and glasses littered the floor, along with dirty plates. The carpet was stained; I felt as though I shouldn’t think too much about what the stains were.
Eventually, I made my way to the front door and stepped out into the daylight. Though the dawn was pale, the light slashed across my eyes like leopard claws. I squinted, shading my eyes with my hand. More students lay scattered on the grass like so much confetti. The stage where the musicians had played still stood, though it had been emptied of instruments and equipment.
I lifted my head a little, keeping my eyes shielded from the sun. I fixed my gaze on the school building and started walking. Progress was painfully, painfully slow. The bobbing motion of my head as I walked made my stomach roil. I dropped my eyes to my dragging feet, but the blur of my steps was no better. I settled for walking with my eyes nearly all the way shut, navigating through the haze of my eyelashes.
I remembered very little after what I had done with that professor. The game of Truth and Dare continued. Other people took their turns, gave confessions, performed sexual and absurd acts. I had done more, I thought. I couldn’t be sure what was real and what was a dream. I shut down my thoughts and focused on walking, putting one foot in front of the other despite the stabbing pain in my ass.
Finally, after the sunlight had strengthened significantly, I made it back to the women’s dorms, and then my room. I pushed against the door, watching my hand move of its own volition. The lock wasn’t engaged. I stumbled in and squinted around. No sign of my roommates. I suddenly longed for Caroline’s presence, her comforting embrace, and the sweet, warm press of her lips on mine.
I turned in the direction of the bathroom we all shared and shuffled on, my chest aching. Caroline was a nice girl. She deserved better than anything I could offer. I was glad not to have to face her, or anyone else.
I flipped on the bathroom light. My reflection in the mirror made me stop short. As if mesmerized, I turned toward that vision of myself and took a good look. I had gone back in time to when I first arrived at the school, disheveled from impromptu jungle exploration, only this time the filth was on my soul rather than my skin.
As a small mercy, I still wore the blue dress, but it was torn and splattered with the same suspicious stains as had colored Zion’s carpeting. My hair had gone from voluminous to frizzy, like a bird’s nest. What remained of my makeup was smudged, and there were dark marks on my arms and shoulders from where my lover, or lovers, had gripped me. I even had the red, faded remnants of a hickey on the top swell of my left breast.
Saliva flooded my mouth. I turned away from the mirror, bile rising up the back of my throat. I dropped to my knees and hugged the toilet. Tears spilled from my eyes while my stomach emptied of its vile, sour contents. I heaved and heaved again until all the poison was purged from my system. Even after, I stayed there, my head pounding, my body aching. The cold of the toilet seat was replaced with warmth from my body. The sensation was faintly disgusting like I’d come in to use the bathroom right after someone else.
It was that more than any real desire to move that made me stand up. My legs protested the change in position. How long I’d been down there, I didn’t care to know. At least no one else had shown back up at the room yet.
I took off the dress and bundled it into a ball and put it in the wastebasket. It was beyond repair.
Time for a shower.
I turned the water on to as hot as I could stand it and climbed in. Steam billowed up around my body while I scrubbed and scrubbed, my skin going raw and red under the abuse. When I couldn’t scrub anymore, when the slightest touch made my skin sting, I leaned against the wall and allowed my tears to come in full force, mingling with the shower water.
I could not wash away my actions, no matter how hard I tried. Not from the night before, or all the days leading up to it. I was going to have to live with this for the rest of my life.
I slid to the floor and hugged my knees, letting the water bead down on my head and shoulders. My mind raced. I had to rethink my mindset about being here and at this school. The feminist in me would never, in a million years, have accepted this. I had been beaten down, broken, forced to adapt. But I couldn’t allow these changes to take hold and become permanent. There was still time. There was always time, wasn’t there?
All the other students at my college would be spending their spring break going crazy in a similar fashion. They’d be partying and having sex, getting drunk, doing things they’d regret. But that wasn’t all there was to life. These weeks wouldn’t define us. We’d go back to college and work for our degrees, become mothers and members of society.
This wasn’t the end.
Determination filtered in through the despair hanging like a thick cloud around me. I couldn’t stop. I had to keep going. I couldn’t let this be all there was for me in life.
I got up from my position on the floor and climbed out of the shower. My stomach flipped and my head pounded. I refused to let those ill feelings interfere. I grabbed some aspirin from the cabinet beneath the sink. Priscilla kept it around for the aches and pains she acquired through physical activity. She wouldn’t mind if a few, or four, went missing.
I brushed my teeth to get rid of the taste of sour alcohol and then raided my roommates’ bags for clothing. I tried not to feel too bad about it. Beggars couldn’t be choosers. I pulled on Priscilla’s yoga pants and a tight tank top from Blanche. Wearing a bra or panties was out of the question. The lines of the underwear would show through and that was worse than wearing nothing.
I peeked out of the dorm room and into the hall. No one was around. The only sound was faint snoring coming through the walls. I snuck through the building and stepped outside. I walked away from the campus, taking the long way around the valley to avoid coming in view of the main administration building. The hairs on the back of my neck stood on end the whole way. At any second, someone would notice me and fetch me back. I was sure of it. I was equally certain I didn’t have the strength to run away if pursued.
But no one came for me.
No one followed.
I reached the long road I’d been so happy to see, all that time ago. I looked back down at the curving road, at the school at the bottom of the valley. A strange feeling made my chest tighten. I put my back to the cluster of buildings and started walking.
If there was anything from my time in the school that was useful, it was the maps. The classrooms had had diagrams, images of the island. Just like American classrooms had pictures of America, these showed various parts of Anwak. Major locations had been displayed. I knew which way to go to get back to the city, to the airport.
I walked.
I walked for hours. Cars passed on occasion but none stopped. I just kept walking. In the end, it took nearly all day, but not as long as I had assumed, and not nearly as long as my adventure through the jungle. No doubt I’d done a lot of weaving back and forth and going in circles in the trees, while this road ran straight and true.
I didn’t encounter the cops. Somehow, as if luck was on my side, I didn’t encounter many people at all, and those I did, paid me no mind. I must have looked too much like a woman on a mission for anyone to bother me.
I reached the hotel. The attendant didn’t ask me any questions as I walked across the lobby and down the hall to my old room.
I gripped the doorknob. It turned easily. I stepped inside, back into my old life.
The sight that greeted me, however, made it quite clear I still had some way to go before things could be normal.
Alora, my gorgeous former guide, was going at it hot and heavy with a man I’d never seen before. His pale skin and reddish hair told me he might be Irish.
That wasn’t the shocking part. I’d gotten over being astonished by sex acts.
Alora wore a strap-on, ramming the thick dildo into
the man’s ass. That was the part that confounded me. For all I’d heard about men being dominant, this one was not. He was, truthfully, being the opposite, and looked like he was having the time of his life. He crouched on his hands and knees on one of the beds, groaning and moaning while stroking his cock. The bed creaked and rocked beneath the weight and motion of their bodies, headboard ramming on the wall.
Alora appeared to be enjoying herself just as much as her partner. “You dirty boy,” she crooned. “You like that, don’t you? You like when I fuck your ass, you pussy?” She smacked his ass, massaged her breasts with the other hand.
“I like it! I love it! Fuck me!” the man moaned. “Make me your ass-whore, Alora!”
Alora rammed into him faster, the collision of their bodies together making the flesh of his ass cheeks ripple. The rhythm of her hips suggested this wasn’t the first time she’d used a strap-on.
I recalled how she had come on to me. She might have done this to me if I had allowed it. The idea made my pussy clench with unwanted arousal.
“Give me your ass!” Alora demanded.
“It belongs to you! I’m a filthy slut!” The trembling tone of the man’s voice said he was close to cumming.
I edged deeper into the room. My foot hit against a heavy bag on the floor. Pain flashed up my leg, reignited the low ache in my own ass. I yelped out my pain and grabbed my leg.
Alora’s head jerked up. So did the man’s. All the joy drained from his expression. He scrambled forward, unceremoniously pulling himself off the dildo-end of the strap-on. He grabbed a pillow and shoved it over his crotch to hide his red, engorged member.
“Get out of here!” He swiveled to Alora, eyes wild. “Get her out!”
Alora put her hand on his shoulder. “Relax. There’s nothing to be ashamed of. No one is going to judge you for the things you like.”
His cheeks flamed red. “Please. I’m not ready to be seen like this.”
Alora looked at me and sighed. “Hold on, honey. I’ll be back for you soon.”
She got up off the bed and walked over, the fake cock swinging from side to side in front of her.
Chapter 21
Don’t get addicted
As I left the hotel, my hopes that getting back to the school would be as without incident as getting out were dashed. As soon as I stepped out into the open, I caught sight of the one and only security guard who patrolled the hotel grounds.
I had noticed him from afar upon first arriving at the hotel. I hadn’t had any real reason to think about him. He wasn’t the type of man I normally found attractive. He was a try-hard, and by that, I meant he was trying too hard to be different. There were people who lived the lifestyle and there were those who did it for the aesthetics and he was clearly the latter. He had light brown skin but very bright red hair, clearly dyed, that spiked out in different directions. His lower lip and ears were pierced, and tattooed sleeves spilled out from under his uniform shirt. The uniform did fit him nicely, but he was wiry and nothing like the muscular male specimens I’d become used to at my stay at the school.
I picked up my pace, hoping to evade him. It was the wrong move. He turned toward me. His face lit up and his eyes raked over my body. He licked his lips, dragging his tongue over the unsightly metal piercing, and dropped his hand to grip his crotch where a tent was forming. There was no mistaking his intentions.
I stopped in my tracks and watched his advance. If he had approached me like this before, I would have run off screaming. Now I knew better. No one would care about my feelings. Een worse, acting out would only draw more attention to me. I had to do this—do him—to keep a low profile.
It had nothing to do with the fact that I had witnessed Alora and her male friend going at it. It had nothing to do with the horniness my bearing witness had inspired in my pussy. And it certainly was not because I hadn’t cum all day when I was used to having several, and more at night.
Absolutely nothing except logic factored into my decision to accept his advances.
The guard reached me and flashed a cocky grin.
With my perfect reasoning to back me, I reached for his pants and pulled his zipper down. He didn’t speak. He spread his legs into a wider stance and locked his knees.
I swallowed hard, my pussy tingling. I pushed his pants down and cupped my hand over his concealed cock. He ground into my palm, grabbing at my shoulders. The feel of him was hot, burning with desire. I grabbed his boxers and yanked them down over his hips.
His cock spilled forward, freed from imprisonment. I held back my disappointment. I couldn’t be disappointed, of course. That would mean I had some sort of personal investment in this. I didn’t. I was doing this for my own safety. Still, I had to admit it was not the most impressive cock I had seen while on the island and it didn’t compare to Zion’s monster dick.
I’d work with it regardless.
I dropped to my knees in front of him and steeled myself. I wrapped my hand around the base of his pulsating shaft and drew him into my mouth. I pulled out all the tricks I had learned from my classes, applying increasing pressure with my tongue and lips. I used my teeth, scraping them along his sensitive skin. I used my tongue to work his tip, making him groan and clutch at my hair. He started pushing his hips against me, thrusting his cock into my mouth and toward my throat. Sensing he was close to cumming, I wrapped my lips firmly around him and started to suck. His body went tense. Incoherent yelps fell from his lips. He shook all over and came in my mouth. His cock went limp an instant after, like a snake that had had its head chopped off.
Really?
I wasn’t impressed.
I stroked his limp form to make him hard again. The second time was always much better than the first. Foreplay on this island was an orgasm, to make everything more sensitive for the real event. My pussy was aching for some attention and I would have no problem getting him ready to go again.
The guard stepped away from me.
I looked up at him, startled.
With a dopey look on his face, he pulled up his pants and underwear. “That was great. Thanks.” He turned around and walked off around the hotel, resuming with his rounds as if he didn’t have something else he needed to do.
“Really?” I yelled after him, climbing to my feet.
No answer. No sign he’d heard me.
I was stunned. He’d cared only about his satisfaction, what I could do for him. That wasn’t what I’d learned at the school. Clearly, there were still assholes even in this idyllic paradise.
Well, whatever. It wasn’t as if I wanted anything, anyway. Really, it had gone as well as it could have. He had left me alone and I should be thankful.
It was a bit difficult to be thankful though when my pussy was soaking-wet and pouting. Walking wasn’t easy. I clutched the phone Alora had given me and made myself walk anyway. If there was a public bathroom somewhere, I’d go in and take care of things, but I wasn’t going to pleasure myself out on the street like a monkey. I drew the line at that. And why should I have to do it myself when there were so many others around?
I hated myself for thinking like that. I scanned the street as I walked, searching for that public bathroom—or some other willing man.
A muscular man stumbled out of a tropical bar right in front of me, like an angel sent to answer my prayers. He caught sight of me and did a doubletake, and nearly fell off the curb onto his face. He straightened and grinned at me, pushing his hands through his hair in a pitiful attempt at cleaning himself up. “Hey, pretty lady,” he slurred.
If I looked down, I knew what I’d see.
The man unzipped his pants and pulled out his cock. “Bring that pussy over here.”
He was drunk. The smell of alcohol wafted from his very pores. I’d been searching for someone to get me off but was I willing to stoop to this level? If I swallowed when he came, I’d probably get drunk, too, he was that far gone.
“I want to fuck!” he said, shaking his cock to emphasize his words
.
Despite myself, I looked at his cock. It was bigger than the security guard’s. He was also muscular and dressed surprisingly nicely despite being drunk so early in the day.
Again, I could resort to my former behavior of running but now I was in the open, away from the hotel, I was even more likely to draw attention to myself.
That left me with only one thing to do.
But I’m not going to be left wanting this time.
I grabbed him by the shoulders and pushed him down to his knees. He went easily, minus the imperfect coordination. He smiled and grabbed my ass, digging his fingers in hard. My pussy throbbed with eagerness.
“Suck my pussy,” I commanded, spreading my legs.
“Yes, ma’am,” he said, smiling wider.
He leaned in and came at my pussy with his tongue thrust out of his mouth. That struck me as a bad sign and I was proven right. He came at me with enthusiasm, but despite that, he seemed to have no idea what he was doing. Maybe that could be forgiven, given his drunkenness, but not by me when I was so full of need. He should have had some sort of muscle memory to tell him what to do. Instead, his tongue slid around without any sort of pattern and he couldn’t have done a better job of avoiding my clit if he’d been trying.
After a minute of pointless licking, I gave up. I grabbed his hair and pulled. “Get up.”
He complied, licking his lips. “Fuck, you taste good.”
I ignored him and turned around and bent over in front of him, exposing my ass and my swollen pussy lips. “Give me your cock!”
He pressed up behind me. Luckily, he knew the way home and pushed his cock inside me. The roughness of his entrance made me gasp and arch. I tossed my head, delighted to finally, finally be rewarded. My inner pussy muscles pulsated around him. He grunted and started thrusting.
The fun ended right there. His uncoordinated, unmeasured jabs did nothing to arouse me.
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