by Hope Ford
I just roll my eyes. “Really, Gage? There’s no way you missed her. She was the skinny blonde that was waiting tables.” I hold my hands out in front of my breast. “Big boobs, been flirting with you since you got here.”
He looks at me like I’m crazy and starts shaking his head. Is he joking with me? Because he acts like he doesn’t have an inkling of what or who I’m talking about. He’s usually more observant and the fact that he can’t even seem to place this woman tells me he’s not thinking right. “I have no idea who you’re talking about,” he says. “Where’s Whitney now?”
I just shrug my shoulders. “She left.”
He nods his head, knowingly, almost like he knew she would ditch me when it came to the fight. “She’s not family. You should have got one of the brothers to handle it. You’re pregnant. Don’t you understand what that means?”
He’s reprimanding me like a child. More than that, he’s acting like I would intentionally hurt my child. I would never do that. He may think of me as some stupid young girl, but I’ve had to take care of myself for years now. I can handle myself. I always have and I always will. And that’s exactly what I tell him. “I can take care of myself, Gage. You act like now that I’m pregnant, I’ve lost all sense or something. I’m still the same woman that takes care of herself. I’ve got this.” I put my hand over my stomach protectively, still holding on to the tray that is now covered in blood. When he seems me still holding it, he pulls it from my hand and throws it across the back lot. It lands with a big crash, and then he turns to me. He crowds me against the wall, one hand pressed against my stomach and other one curling around my cheek. There is still anger in his eyes, but there’s something else too. I almost question him about it, but I don’t want to get my hopes up. Gage sees me as a child, someone for him to protect. Nothing more. I could stay exactly like this the rest of the night, but all I’m doing is hurting myself. I need to distance myself. Putting my hand on his forearm, I push him away gently and gesture to his hand. “I’m not hurt. Not even a scratch. You’re the one with the bloody knuckles.”
9
Gage
I’m so confused at how I’ve ended up in the hot seat when I’m the one that saved her ass. Okay, she had it under control, but I still jumped in and helped. Now she’s holding my hand, bringing it up to her face to inspect my knuckles. They’re cracked and bleeding, but I don’t even feel it. I’m more numb right now than anything. The last thing I’m worried about is my hand.
I try to pull it back, but she grips it tighter. “These cuts need to be cleaned.”
She may be as badass as some of the men of Heartlands, but she definitely worries like a woman. “I’m fine. I’m not worried about my hand. I’m worried about you… and the baby.”
“I’m fine. The baby is fine,” she mumbles before pulling me through the bar, telling Ranger that she needs to bandage me up. He just smirks at me, shaking his head. I stick my middle finger up at him and follow Roxy through the bar. I do my best to not watch her hips sway in front of me, but I can’t take my eyes off of her.
Roxy walks me back to Ranger’s office. She grabs the hidden key and types in the code to get into the office, which means Ranger trusts her a lot. He doesn’t give many people that information. If Roxy wasn’t pregnant, I wouldn’t think anything of it. But for a brief second, it gets me wondering if Ranger could be the father. Shaking my head, I quickly nix that thought. Not only is Ranger so far gone for Ruby, but I also know that Roxy is not the type to mess with someone that is in a relationship already.
She pulls the first aid kit off the shelf and I watch as she takes out all the supplies and starts to clean up my hand. Since I have her undivided attention, I ask her again, “Who’s the father, Roxy?”
She stares back at me, unflinching. She’s stubborn and lifts her chin in defiance. When the fuck did she become such a hard-headed, sexy as fuck force to be reckoned with?
She’s gripping my hand between us and my other hand slides to her knee. Squeezing her leg, I ask her, “Why won’t you tell me? I won’t kill him. I promise.”
She looks down at my hand on her knee and stares at it for the longest time. This side of her I rarely ever see. She always has her guard up and for it to drop, even if it’s only for a second, is unheard of. I don’t want to break the trance she’s in. The urge to kiss her and push her down on the desk and fuck her until she’s begging to tell me everything I want to know scares the fuck out of me. I tighten my hold on her and when she flinches, I release her. She makes quick work of bandaging my hand. Neither one of us says a word to each other and in that silence we seem to say so much.
When she does finally look up at me, I see the desire in her eyes. I swear I’ve never seen that look before on her face. She finishes bandaging my hand and lets it fall easily to my lap. The loss of connection between the two of us has me wanting to grab her hand again. But I don’t. Instead, I ask her again, almost pleadingly, “Tell me, Roxy.”
She blows out a frustrated breath. “Why do you want to know? You going to hold a shot gun to his head and make him marry me? I won’t marry him just because I’m pregnant.”
A thought fills my head and I can’t get it out. It pummels me in the stomach and I put voice to it before I think twice about it. “You love him. The father of your child, you love him.”
She shrugs her shoulders. “Why do you say that?”
My hands itch to reach out for her and pull her into my arms. “Because I know you. I know that you’re not going to give yourself to someone – that way – if you didn’t love them.”
She looks like she may deny it, but I can see the truth shining in her eyes. “Yeah, I love him.”
I do my best to hide the emotion from my face, but jealousy burns in my belly. She’s in love with someone else.
When a tear escapes her eye, I reach out and touch it with the pad of my thumb, wiping it away and cupping her face with both my hands. “I can’t believe he doesn’t feel the same, Rox. He would be crazy not to love you. You know that, right?”
She puts her hand on my forearm in an attempt to push me away, but I don’t let her. I grab on to her hand, lacing our fingers together. I was too late. I came to my senses too late. And now I’ve lost her.
She looks down at our hands and back at me. “You’re wrong. He doesn’t love me… not like that.” Her voice cracks at the end and then I don’t fight it. I grab on to her hips and pull her over to me, seating her on my lap. She fits like she was made for me. I wrap my arms around her and do my best to position her so she doesn’t feel the hardening of my cock against her shapely ass. I hold on to her, hoping that she doesn’t completely lose it on me. I can’t stand it when a woman cries, but I think seeing Roxy upset like this is worse than anything I’ve ever experienced… and I’ve experienced a lot.
I tuck her head under my chin, holding her to my chest. Whispering into her hair, I tell her, “If that’s true, if he truly doesn’t love you, then he’s a dumbass and you deserve better anyway.”
She sniffles and I hold her tighter. It’s as if I think I can cure it all if I hold her tight enough. Belatedly, I remember the baby and loosen my hold on her, but when I do, her arms tighten around me. We sit there for I don’t know how long, but when she finally seems to calm down, I know I need to let her go… before I do something stupid. She’s just told me she’s in love with someone else, but I still want her. I still want to spread her legs, have her straddle me and feel the core heat of her pressed against my hard cock. Man, I know I’m screwed.
When I set her back away from me, into the chair across from me, I immediately get up. She stops me, telling me thank you and I thank her for bandaging my hand. I almost run out of there, leaving Roxy to stare after me like I’m really crazy.
10
Roxy
I sit and stare at the closed door that Gage just walked through. For a minute there, I thought he felt it too. All the sexual tension that’s been building year after year, I finally th
ought he felt it too. But he didn’t. I know by the way he set me away from him and would barely look me in the face. I had hoped he couldn’t read the desire and love in my eyes and obviously he didn’t. He left so fast I knew he must have just been passionate about wanting to look out for me… that was it. He’s always looked out for me and I’ve always trusted him, so I know he doesn’t understand what’s going on with me right now. It has to be hard on him that suddenly he’s someone that I hide things from. Which sucks, honestly. I’ve been close to Cat and Stella, but I’ve always felt a bond with Gage. I’ve told him everything. Well, almost everything. I’m a private person but he’s always been somebody that I can talk to and someone that I trust. He calls me on my shit and I do the same for him. To know that’s changing, that this pregnancy is changing our relationship is hard. But I still wouldn’t have it any other way. I cup my hand across my belly and stroke it easily. I’m still early, so I don’t feel any flutters or any kicks, but I still feel him in there. Knowing that I have a part of Gage inside me, that’s what pushes me and gives me the strength to go on.
I get up and put away the first aid kit before heading back out to the bar. We were already short staffed and when I come out, Ranger is out waiting tables and Gage is helping out. When I catch Gage looking at me I smile at him to let him know we’re okay. It’s not his fault that he doesn’t feel the same way toward me that I feel toward him. He’s always been good to me and no matter what he feels, I don’t want to lose him as a friend.
I grab a tray off the bar top and start to walk out to the tables to help with orders. Gage steps in front of me. “Roxy, please, tonight has been rough enough. For me, can you please just work behind the bar? Ranger and I got this.”
Before I can answer, Saint walks up to me and takes the tray from my hand. “I’ll help.”
Any other time I would argue with him, spouting off how I can take care of myself, but seeing how he asks so nicely and the fact that it has been a rough night—I mean, I’ve gotten the man into two fights already and it’s still early—I agree. “Sure. I’ll help behind the bar.” I turn to walk away, and then turn back to him. When I stop, his eyes fly up from my backside to my face, a blush crossing his face. Did I just catch him watching my ass? Surely not. “Uh, tonight. I’ll stay behind the bar… tonight,” I tell him. I don’t want him to think I’m going to be back there every night. A woman has to keep some of her control.
As soon as I walk behind the bar, Cat hits me with her hip. “You okay? Gage looks like he wants to kill someone.”
I nod my head, thinking what she said is about right because he did about kill a man outside. I get lost in my work then, the loud classic rock blaring through the sound system, the laughter and voices talking, filling my head. I do my best to stay focused, but my thoughts keep going back to Gage.
Gage
I feel like a fuckin’ traitor. Roxy has always trusted me to have her best interests in mind. I’ve always looked out for her. She may not think she needs saving, but I’ve saved her from more worthless men than I can count. I would see the desire in their eyes as they looked at her and I would nip it in the bud quick. I feel like she’s always looked up to me.
But now, once I pictured taking her on Ranger’s desk it’s like I can’t turn it off. I can’t look at her like she’s someone I should be devouring. When she came out of the back and smiled at me, it’s the same smile she’s given me a hundred times. She’s always been beautiful to me, but her smiles used to seem sweet… innocent.
When she smiles at me now, I feel like she pulled the trigger on the starting gun, telling me to come and get her. How can one smile do that to me? Fill my head with all these sinful thoughts?
My cock is so hard thinking of her I know I can’t walk right. I’m supposed to be taking orders and helping wait tables and I can barely walk with my stiffy between my legs. I can’t remember the last time I was hard just by looking at a woman and every time I look at Roxy now—hell, just thinking about her does it to me.
I walk over to the bar and put an order in. “Two lite drafts.”
Roxy laughs and the soft melody does me even further in.
“What are you laughing about?”
She looks like she may not answer, but finally she shrugs her shoulders as if saying what the hell. “I was just thinking if this was a different kind of bar, one where there were more women than men, I bet you’d make really good money in tips right now.”
She sets the beers on my tray and I look at her questioningly.
She rolls her eyes and shrugs her shoulders. “You know you look good, Gage.”
Her face heats up as she says it. I pick up the tray and start to walk away. Was she flirting with me? I turn and look at her and catch her looking at my ass. When she raises her eyes up to mine, she winks at me. Shocked, I trample over Saint and we both fall to the floor, covered in beer. When I look back up to Roxy, she and Cat are both laughing at us. Fuck, is this night ever going to end?
11
Roxy
A week of watching Gage come into the bar and drinking every night has me worried. It’s not like he’s getting drunk, but he’s definitely drinking more than he usually does. But it’s not just the drinking that’s bothering me, it’s the fact that he’s said so little to me.
I’ve caught him staring at me and when I do, he turns away from me. He barely talks to me and when he does, it’s usually something really simple and he walks away from me. I don’t know what to think about it. He’s never treated me this way, not in the three years I’ve known him. He may be short and sometimes even a dick to others, but he’s always been gentle with me. Even Cat has been asking me what is going on with us. I tell her nothing, but it’s only because I don’t really have a clue what is bothering him.
I walk from behind the bar to where he’s sitting. He’s parked at his favorite booth and I can tell he’s already had a drink or two. I sit down across from him without even waiting to see if he’s all right with me joining him. I would’ve done it in the past and I refuse to think that our friendship has changed so much I can’t do the same now. He resituates himself in the seat and I can tell he’s uncomfortable. “What’s your beef with me, Gage?”
His look is guarded and he’s looking over my shoulder. He won’t even look me in the face. “Nothing,” he mutters.
I try to hide the pain from my face. I knock my knuckles on the table in front of him to get his attention. “You’re lying. Before now, I never would have thought that would happen. You’ve always been honest with me… until now.” I try to keep the emotion out of my voice, but that’s impossible. Gage means so much to me and the thought that I could be losing him almost destroys me. I need to tell him about the baby. But I can’t. Not like this.
Finally, he looks at me. “I’m not angry with you, if that’s what you’re asking. Though I should be. You couldn’t bring me a drink on your way over here?”
Gage is never rude to me—sometimes to others, but never to me. I know he’s doing it on purpose.
I want to get up and walk away, but how much our friendship means to me has me staying in my seat. “Is it that I’m pregnant? Well, get over it because I’m having this baby. I want him or her, and you acting like a dick to me isn’t going to change that.”
His scowl darkens and I know I was wrong. That’s not what he’s mad about. I’ve tried to figure it out all week and that’s all I could figure. I thought he was upset that I’m pregnant, but now I don’t know what his problem is.
I stand up from the table and lean over toward him. My intention is to let him know I mean business, that I’m not backing down. Our friendship is too important to me. “What is wrong with you?”
Gage’s gaze drops lower and I can feel it, like a heavy pressure that slides down my neck and over my cleavage. I’m sure I’m wrong, maybe misunderstanding his look, but when he keeps staring at my breasts, I lose all my conviction and straighten up. “I’ll get you that drink.” I tell him before
I walk away.
I retreat to the bar, my heart feeling as if it’s broken in two. I no sooner get the mug out than Gage has his hand on my arm, pulling me toward Ranger’s office. He opens the door and shuts us inside. My mouth drops open in shock, watching him as he paces back and forth. I’m trying to catch up, from our conversation back in the bar to me walking away and to now, me standing with him in a closed office. I’m trying to figure out what in the world is wrong with him.
He comes toward me and walks me backwards until I’m against the closed door. “You want to know what’s wrong with me?”
His hands are on each side of my head and my head is tilted back so I can look up at him. His chest is heaving, almost like he’s been running. His nostrils are flared and I can see the tick in his jaw. He looks like a man that is barely hanging on and if I say anything it might put him over the edge. So I just stare up at him and wait. I’ve never seen him like this. It’s a little scary, but it’s a lot hot.
His voice is almost a growl. “I’ve been coming in night after night seeing you and knowing you’ve changed.”
I start to interrupt him. I want him to know that I’m still the same person, but he interrupts me and draws me even closer. His body is pressed to mine and I can feel my nipples harden at the contact. I bite my lip to hold in the whimper.
His hand goes around my neck, forcing my eyes to his. The hold he has on me would be scary if it was anybody else. With him, it’s exciting and fills my heads with way too many thoughts that I can’t be thinking right now.
He rubs the pad of his thumb across the pressure point of my neck. I know he can feel my pulse beating wildly. “You’re not that snarky, fearless girl anymore. You’re a woman and I want to treat you like one.”