JESSE. Are you okay?
ALEX. No.
I wasn’t going to thank you.
ALEX. Good.
I hate it when you thank me for sex.
Why didn’t you say?
ALEX. Sixty-nine per cent of spouses tell lies.
Eighty per cent of women lie to protect someone’s feelings.
You’re the teacher… work it out…
JESSE. Fucking hell Alex.
Beat.
ALEX. We shouldn’t have done that.
JESSE. I just want to be clear that you pointedly said yes.
ALEX. Jesus Jesse, I’m not accusing you of rape!
JESSE. Shit can get grey when you’re in this…
Purgatory…
So, I was… Deliberate.
About obtaining consent.
ALEX. I should go.
JESSE. Why?
ALEX. Because I want to go…
JESSE. I want to kiss your eyes and your lips and have you fall asleep on me and as you drift off make all sorts of small but important promises I’ll keep forever
It’s physically crushing but she manages to steady herself. Just.
Beat.
ALEX. I have an a– [ppointment]
JESSE. Don’t you get that I really don’t want you to go.
She puts on her shoes.
Do you really want to go?
She hesitates.
Don’t go.
Beat.
I don’t know… a cuddle… a shower…
He gets up.
Grabs a T-shirt.
Don’t get dressed…
If we both get dressed it kind of ends the –
JESSE. So don’t get dressed.
She sits. Head in hands.
He pulls her close.
They hold one another really tightly.
Long long beat as they cling to one another.
ALEX. I actually think I just want to lie on the floor while you grate cheese into my mouth.
He laughs.
JESSE. Gruyère?
ALEX. Sure.
JESSE. I’ve got a sharp little cheddar in the pantry…
She laughs.
ALEX. The pantry?
Smiles.
Eye contact.
Beat.
I am so in love with you.
JESSE. So stay…
ALEX. That has never –
She pulls herself up.
Picks up a Modern Israeli phrasebook from the dresser…
Why are you learning Hebrew?
He takes it, puts it back.
I can’t stay.
JESSE. Then I’m coming with you.
ALEX. I’m not sure I want you to.
JESSE. Please don’t take Poppy away from me.
ALEX. There is this…
This. Panic… in you.
This fear. This fury.
And it’s inexplicable. And it’s terrifying.
It’s poisonous, Jesse.
And I saw it from the moment I met you.
JESSE. I’d just had the shit beaten out of me in fairness…
ALEX. And I wanted to –
Not save you… not that exactly. But try and find a way to make it better.
JESSE. I just need you with me.
Everything is better when you’re with me.
ALEX. And that’s all I have ever tried to do.
Just make it better for you. Lighter.
The big stuff – love, our marriage… guidance and all the big-changey relationship stuff.
JESSE. It’s a two-way thing.
We both have –
ALEX. But little stuff too.
Making sure we have your favourite food.
Folding your clothes.
That’s all so domestic – I’m not your wifey…
JESSE. Alex, I –
ALEX. No Jesse. It’s my turn to talk.
I’ve tried to care for you… really care for you… I’ve tried to make you laugh and make sure there’s been intimacy and love and happiness and celebrations and parties, dinners, sleeps, sex, mornings, movies…
Music. That’s always been our thing. I know you don’t give a shit about it as much as me, but you go along with it, and we have all these memories, this life we built… – telling you I love you in a helicopter just above Liberty Island, those crazy Thai massages after the Full Moon Party, floating in the Dead Sea, Paris. New York. Hackney… Here.
And Poppy.
We made a person… Jesse.
We built an actual life.
And I have to protect her.
JESSE. This is exactly my point.
ALEX. From you.
JESSE. Whoa.
ALEX. This fear in you is just too too much… it’s ruined you.
It’s ruined us.
I’m not going to let you ruin her.
JESSE. That is really unfair. It’s every –
ALEX. Have you ever considered for a second that the only person who hates you, that the only person who has ever wanted to hurt you, is actually just you?
JESSE. I’ll fight you for her. I will.
ALEX. And have you ever just considered that I’m not responsible for that idiot in the park. Or the Spanish Inquisition, or the bombing in Paris or Nazis or Hamas or the Labour Party or any of it.
JESSE. Don’t you think for a second that I won’t fight you for her.
ALEX. It happened. That’s it.
JESSE. It keeps on happening.
ALEX. You can’t let it define you.
JESSE. It defines me. There’s scar tissue in my DNA.
ALEX. Well, I can’t keep fighting it.
I don’t have the energy.
JESSE. There’s scar tissue in her DNA too.
ALEX. No, Jesse. There’s not.
JESSE. What does that mean?
ALEX. I’m not sure she is yours.
I’m sorry.
Beat. It instantly breaks him but he pulls it back.
JESSE. I don’t care. I don’t care. I don’t fucking care.
It’s probably better. I don’t care.
I love her. I don’t care.
I love you. I love – just don’t…
This is everything.
It’s all…
Beat.
Please don’t break it.
Please don’t do this to me.
Long beat.
ALEX. All I have ever wanted is for you to stop being so frightened.
They just stare at one another.
I’m sorry.
She leaves.
He is destroyed.
2004. The beach terrace at Space Nightclub, Ibiza
The sun is coming up.
ALEX is building a spliff. She’s in generic boho-chic-beach party wear. She has a takeaway coffee cup.
JESSE walks in. Torn jeans and a dirty white T-shirt with the word ‘Newport’ emblazoned across it in the style of the Nike logo and swoosh. He also has a takeaway coffee cup.
They’re both a bit fucked, and a bit rough for it. Slightly smeared eye make-up and slightly dirty clothes.
It’s been a very long, but equally very fun night.
JESSE watches ALEX for a bit…
She clocks him. Nods.
JESSE. So… What did you come as?
ALEX. Slightly Judgemental Shoreditch Twat.
You?
JESSE. Ironic Townie.
ALEX (raises spliff). Salut!
JESSE (raises coffee cup). Chin-chin motherfucker.
ALEX. British?
JESSE. Oggy oggy oggy!!
Oi oi – (Filters off.)
She’s not impressed.
I obviously think those blokes are dicks.
ALEX. Obviously…
JESSE. You?
ALEX. I’m the promoter… summer season…
JESSE. So what brings you here?
ALEX. Any chance to torment slightly geeky boys at beach clubs in Ibiza, really…
JESSE. Well do
ne.
ALEX. Chin-chin.
JESSE. But really…
ALEX. Getting fucked off my head on shit drugs and dancing to shit house music.
You?
JESSE. Basically the same.
Lads’ holiday…
ALEX. You’re a child.
JESSE. So are you.
ALEX. I DJ’d before.
JESSE. Bullshit!
ALEX. Nine to ten.
JESSE. p.m.?
ALEX. No. I’m just hardcore.
He’s working out the maths.
Yes.
p.m. Warm-up shift.
The guy who owns the bar wants to fuck me. So let me have a go.
Not a chance. By the way.
So how is Club 18–30. Pulled yourself lots of – birds?
JESSE. Have you seen me?
ALEX. I have…
JESSE. Less Club 18–30 more Club three friends who are woefully unprepared for this…
ALEX. Why?
JESSE. Because we never leave Highgate.
It’s like a posh prison
ALEX. Are you posh?
JESSE. Firmly middle.
Dad just lucked out when weird rich uncle who no one else liked died… so –
Ching. Ching. Ching. Deposit…
ALEX. Nice.
JESSE. Are you posh?
ALEX. No. I’m cool.
JESSE. I can tell.
She has finished making the joint. She presents it…
ALEX. Smoke?
JESSE. Weed?
ALEX. No. PG Tips.
JESSE. Here?
It’s all in the look from her: ‘Where else?’
Won’t we get kicked out?
ALEX. You care?
JESSE. I care if we get arrested and deported and I get chucked out of college.
ALEX. Ah… now I understand…
JESSE. I don’t know what that means.
ALEX. How do you say?
Drama Queen…
JESSE. Just like that. Perfect.
ALEX. We’re fine. I’m the DJ. So, you don’t want to smoke?
JESSE. Maybe down on the beach…
ALEX. They might not let you back in.
JESSE. Do you care?
ALEX (shrugs). My friends left hours ago…
JESSE. Mine didn’t come…
ALEX. So what have you been doing all night?
JESSE. I scored some shit pills that I initially thought might actually be speed but now that they stopped working I think were probably just Pro Plus.
ALEX. And, what have we got in there?
JESSE. Double-shot mocha…
ALEX. Why?
JESSE. It’s the only actual drugs I could get anywhere and we’re on a boat tour to Formentera in about an hour… What you got?
ALEX. Smirnoff Ice.
JESSE. Smirnoff Ice?
ALEX. Smirnoff Ice.
JESSE. Why have you got Smirnoff Ice in a coffee cup?
ALEX. Habit.
JESSE. That doesn’t answer the question.
ALEX. I enjoy Smirnoff Ice, it brings up the pills and when I have my coffee cup I want people to look at me and think, that girl…
… she’s important.
Oh I bet she’s off to a meeting.
Oh I bet she’s off to the post office.
JESSE. I feel like right now people look at you and think oh I bet that girl’s off her face on pills.
ALEX. I can neither confirm nor deny your allegations.
JESSE. So do you have any?
ALEX. Had.
JESSE. I’ve never taken an E.
ALEX. Don’t.
JESSE. Why?
ALEX. It wouldn’t end well.
JESSE. I can handle an E.
ALEX. You can?
JESSE. Abso-fucking-lutely-not.
ALEX. I don’t think I can either.
I’ve been secretly cutting my hair every time I take it.
JESSE. Who you keeping it secret from?
ALEX. Me.
Ssssh…
JESSE. So don’t take it.
ALEX (considers). Done.
Smiles. He does not know what to do with her…
What now?
JESSE. Enjoy working here?
ALEX. Medium.
JESSE. Just medium?
ALEX. Well I’m on the terrace talking to you and coming up like a twat so I’m obviously not taking it that seriously… What do you do?
JESSE. I’m at drama school in London.
ALEX. Taxi!
He smiles.
JESSE. You can’t go…
ALEX. Why?
JESSE. This could be significant…
ALEX. How?
JESSE. The game-changer.
ALEX. Oh really?
JESSE. Yeah man.
We met at the beach.
We travelled the world.
Married. Kids. The whole shebang.
ALEX. Ah – you’re a romantic…
JESSE. I just need ten seconds and you’ll fall completely in love…
ALEX. Okay.
Go…
JESSE. Okay.
Wait…
ALEX. What am I waiting for?
JESSE. How long is ten seconds?
ALEX. Eight… nine…
Does the Countdown jingle.
JESSE. And did it work?
Considers…
ALEX. I guess we’ll see…
I like your necklace…
JESSE. Thanks.
It’s my dad’s and then his dad’s and then his… and his…
He shows her – it’s a really cute Magen David.
ALEX. It’s pretty
JESSE. I mean I was going for something a bit more masculine…
ALEX. I never buy anything delicate.
I don’t have that kind of life.
JESSE. What kind of life do you have?
ALEX. I have a –
– a very cool life…
What do you think of Ibiza?
JESSE. It’s fine.
I hoped it would be cooler.
ALEX. You’re on the wrong side…
JESSE. Apparently…
ALEX. San Miguel is pretty cool.
A little more arty.
JESSE. There are so many dirtbags down here.
I wish someone would just round them all up and ship them off to an island.
ALEX. I think this might be the island.
JESSE. It kinda smells.
ALEX. Ah yes.
The stench of Ibiza. It’s famous… you know.
The end of all hope, alioli and piss.
JESSE. I kind of love it.
ALEX. Me too.
JESSE. Want to stay forever…?
ALEX. We’ll see…
Beat.
JESSE. Wait…
ALEX. What?
JESSE. Listen…
They listen. Beat.
We hear ‘Fuck the Pain Away’ by Peaches/2ManyDJ’s coming from inside.
Can you hear that?
Tune!
ALEX. I love this song. This song gives me goosebumps.
JESSE. I love M People.
ALEX. M People…?
JESSE. Do you get M People in Ibiza?
ALEX. We get M People in Peckham.
JESSE. My first dance with my mum at my Bar Mitzvah was to ‘Movin’ On Up’.
ALEX. You’re Jewish…?
JESSE. Chosen. Yes.
You?
ALEX. I never get chosen for anything.
JESSE. I’d choose you.
ALEX. What for?
JESSE. What are you good at?
ALEX. This.
JESSE. So, I chose well.
ALEX. Who fucken knows…
How’s chosen?
JESSE. It’s potentially good you know… Israel are gonna withdraw from the Gaza Strip and the West Bank… And South Lebanon and loads of prisoners from both sides are being freed and I dunno – it suddenly feels like a corn
er. You know. A new dawn…
ALEX. Oh you’re in to the politics?
JESSE. I’m not sure I am to be honest… but I hope that if they get this right, in Israel… maybe everyone else will stop coming for us… you know…
ALEX. Does everyone come for you?
Beat. Is about to. Stops.
JESSE. It’s too boring. Let’s talk about something else…
This promoting thing… you on your gap year?
ALEX. Yeah that’s it…
JESSE. What?
ALEX. Do you know how much uni costs?
JESSE. I vaguely know how much drama school costs…
ALEX. I can’t afford to go to university!
JESSE. Oh.
Shit.
ALEX. Yeah.
It’s alright for some.
JESSE. Student loans…?
ALEX. It’s fine. I have a plan.
JESSE. So what’s the plan?
ALEX. Well if I tell you that, I’m gonna have to kill you.
JESSE. Please don’t kill me.
Do you wanna go to uni?
ALEX. It’s not all about uni.
JESSE. Do you want to though?
ALEX. I don’t ‘three K a year plus living costs’ wanna go to uni…
JESSE. We could make that in a night…
ALEX. How?
JESSE. Three hundred paracetamol.
Tenner a pop.
Everyone’s way too fucked to even notice…
ALEX. And here was I thinking you were a nice Highgate boy who wanted to go off and save the world.
JESSE. What the fuck ever gave you that idea?
ALEX. Don’t all nice Highgate boys wanna go off and save the world.
JESSE. I mean mainly.
But. Fuck that.
Although if you wanted go off and save the world.
Then I’d totally come with.
ALEX. I haven’t asked you.
JESSE. Please?
ALEX. Um.
JESSE. Pretty please?
ALEX. Okay. Sure. Yes.
But as the realist in the room…
JESSE. Beach.
ALEX. As the realist on the beach…
JESSE. Don’t be a realist.
ALEX. Fuck it.
Done.
Let’s totally go off and save the world.
JESSE. Good…
Cos you know it probably starts with us…
ALEX. You and me us?
JESSE. Why not?
ALEX. Why the fuck not…
JESSE. And we could still sell the paracetamol to fund the plan so –
Win-win.
Beat.
What you looking at?
ALEX. Just thinking…
JESSE. About…?
ALEX. What’s your name?
JESSE. Jesse. What’s yours?
ALEX. Alex.
Beat.
JESSE. Hi Alex.
ALEX. So… Jesse…
One Jewish Boy Page 6