It did Noah’s heart good to see Fannie get her plate of food and leave the group of women for the first time since she’d arrived. He followed her to the swing set beside the school and they each sat down a swing. “Are you enjoying yourself?”
“I am. It almost feels like I’m back in school,” she admitted with a shy smile. “Your brothers’ wives have some funny stories to share about their husbands, but the bishop’s wife takes the cake. If half of what she says is true, he is blessed to have her as his keeper. Twice this month she found his glasses on his mule’s rump when he came in from the field.”
Noah laughed. “Why there?”
“He claimed it was a handy flat spot to lay them so he could wipe the sweat off of his face, and he just forgot them.”
“So mingling hasn’t been so bad today?”
She swung gently back and forth. “It hasn’t been this morning. Has anyone suggested a ball game later?”
“They have. It will be the annual boys against the men softball game. I will be pitching for the men’s team.”
“The underdogs?”
“We are not. The opposing pitcher is eleven, but I’m told he has a good arm.”
She chuckled. “I can’t wait to cheer you on.”
“Are you going to be able to come to my regular game tomorrow? It’s the last home game of the season. We’ll be league champions if we win it and the next away game.”
“I do plan to come. Our riding exhibition isn’t until next Saturday. Which is good, because we need to practice with our carts. It was a great idea, Noah. I’m glad you thought of it.”
It was gratifying that he had pleased her. He wanted to go on making her happy. “If I come up with anything else I’ll let you know.”
“And I have called you birdbrained for the last time. It was fun while it lasted, but the name doesn’t truly fit you.”
“Can I walk you home when this is over tonight?”
“I’d like that.”
He rose and took her plate. Laying it aside, he said, “I have a little time before I have to get back to work. Would you like a push?”
“Now I really feel like I’m back in school.” She giggled as she gripped the chains and lifted her feet.
* * *
As the men began their ball game against the boys late in the afternoon, Fannie joined Margret and her sister on a quilt in the shade where they could watch the game in progress. Margret was holding Rebecca’s baby on her shoulder. The contented baby was trying to get his entire fist in his mouth and drooling excessively on his fingers.
“He’s getting your dress damp,” Fannie told her.
“I don’t mind. Aren’t babies wonderful?”
Fannie wrinkled her nose. “Not if one is drooling down my neck.”
Rebecca returned to the quilt and sat down. “I can take him now.”
“Is it all right if I hold him a little longer?” Margret asked hopefully.
His mother smiled. “I don’t mind.”
“He’s such a good baby. It must be wonderful to be a mother.” Margret patted his back and he burped loudly.
“He is Gott’s greatest blessing to me and Samuel. Gott willing, you will know the same joy someday.”
“I pray you are right, but I’m not getting any younger, and there are many more single women in our community than there are single men because the boys leave as teenagers and don’t return.”
Lillian called to Rebecca from the school steps. Rebecca waved and rose to her feet again. “If you get tired of holding him, I’m sure Fannie will take him.”
“I won’t get tired,” Margret assured her, smiling at the baby.
“When are you going home?” Fannie asked, desperate to talk about something other than babies. They were cute and they smelled good, but she wasn’t ready to want one.
“I leave next week.”
“I thought you were staying until the end of the month.”
“My sister is staying longer. She has caught the eye of a young man from your church. The only two that struck my fancy are already seeing someone.” She gave Fannie a sidelong glance.
Fannie gaped at her in surprise. “Do you mean Noah?”
“Have I offended you?” Margret asked quickly.
“Nee, I’m not offended.” Surprised, yes, but she wasn’t sure why she should be. Noah was a good-looking fellow from a nice family. He was hardworking and kind. Any woman would feel he was good husband material.
“Are you serious about each other?” Margret asked.
Fannie glanced to where Noah was standing in the batter’s box as she pondered Margret’s question. He was dressed plain today, with dark pants and suspenders over his muscular shoulders. He had taken off his hat in order to run the bases. She liked him best in plain clothes. They suited him. He took a swing at the first pitch and knocked it straight into the second baseman’s glove. A groan went up from his bench. He turned to them and held his hands wide. “I’m a pitcher, not a hitter.”
Fannie sighed. While she felt her relationship with Noah had grown in recent days, he hadn’t said anything to that effect. “I’m afraid I may be more serious about him than he is about me.”
“I hope that isn’t the case,” Margret said softly.
“Who is the other fellow?”
“Hiram, but your mother mentioned he is engaged to your sister. It seems I am too late in coming to Bowmans Crossing. The Erb sisters have snagged the best ones.”
Fannie caught her lower lip between her teeth. If Noah hadn’t been spending so much time with her, would he have discovered he liked the bishop’s niece? Had her wild scheme prevented him from finding true romance? Or was he growing to care for her as she had grown to care for him?
Margret glanced Fannie’s way. “There is talk that Noah may leave the faith. Are you aware of that?”
“He has not made that decision.”
“So you have talked about it? Are you hoping to sway his decision by your affection?”
“Nee, I don’t feel that would be right.”
“And yet you continue to see him, knowing he may leave us.”
“He is my friend, and I will support him in his decision.”
“I’m surprised to hear you say that. Are you thinking about leaving the faith, as well? If he does?”
“There are many unanswered questions in my heart. If I choose to leave, it will not be because of Noah. What about you? Have you considered leaving?”
“I have already been baptized. I have no intention of leaving the Amish.”
“But what if you never marry? What would you do then?”
“I have faith that God has a path laid out for me. I will do my best to accept His will. I long for love, marriage and children of my own, but if that is not to be, I will spend my life in service to my parents, my siblings and my community. There are many things an unmarried woman can do to make life better for all.”
“But can you be happy?”
Margret laughed. “Of course I can be happy. Happiness does not come from outside of us. It comes from the inside. My uncle lost both his legs in a farm accident. No one would blame him for descending into bitterness, but he found inner peace and he is as happy as the next person. Perhaps more so, for he knows how close he came to losing his life. I think happiness comes from serving others. I don’t think it comes from having the things we think we want.”
Fannie glanced to where Noah was playing ball with his brothers. He seemed content today, but she knew questions about his place in the world troubled him. If she hadn’t involved him in her courtship ploy, he would have had to end his rumspringa and make his decision. Would he have accepted his place among the Amish as God’s will without testing his skill as a pitcher? As much as she hated to think of him going out into
the world, she knew he needed to find out for himself.
Rebecca came out the school door and stood on the step. “Margret, can you give us a hand? Let Fannie hold Benjamin. It will only take a few minutes. You don’t mind, do you, Fannie?”
Before Fannie could form a reply, the drooling baby was thrust into her arms. She sat him upright in her lap, but his head wobbled so much she thought he might hurt his neck. She pulled him close against her chest and cradled him in her arms. He stared at her with wide blue eyes that soon grew worried.
“Don’t cry.” Fannie searched for something to distract him. She used her bonnet ribbon to dangle in front of him, touching his nose and then pulling it away.
His frown disappeared. He grinned a wide toothless smile when his chubby fingers closed over the ribbon and he promptly stuffed it into his mouth. In a matter of seconds it was wet with drool.
Fannie smiled at him. “At least it’s not my neck.”
When Margret returned a few minutes later, Fannie reluctantly gave him back. Babies weren’t so bad, after all.
* * *
“This is the first time in ten years that the grown men have lost to the schoolboy team in their annual game.” Noah knew he’d be teased mercilessly when his ball team learned of it.
He sat down on the quilt beside Fannie. Most of the people who had come to the frolic were packing up and heading home. The new wing of the school was finished, except for the siding that needed to be painted, but that would be done by the schoolchildren after the start of the school year. “Timothy and Lillian are tickled with the amount of work that was done today.”
When Fannie didn’t reply, he glanced her way. She was staring off into the distance. He looked in that direction and saw the bishop helping his wife and nieces into his buggy.
“Margret is a very sweet woman,” Fannie said without looking at Noah. “Have you taken the time to visit with her?”
“I’m too busy spending time with you.”
“If we weren’t dating, would you be interested in her?”
He leaned back on his arms and crossed his legs at the ankles. “If we weren’t dating, you’d be in Florida, and I’d be hiding in the barn to avoid all the single women my mother had lined up for me to meet.”
“I’m serious.”
“Fannie, it’s too late now to wonder what would have happened if we had made a different choice. If Gott has chosen Margret Stolfus to be my wife, it will come to pass.”
“I reckon.” She swiveled to face him. “What kind of wife are you looking for?”
“I haven’t been looking for a wife, Fannie.”
“If you were, what kind of woman would she be?”
“Funny, caring, loyal.” Everything you are. Only he didn’t have the right to say that to her. “What kind of husband are you looking for?”
“If I ever choose to marry, it will be to a man who accepts me as I am. He won’t want to change me. I’ll want him to be kind, hardworking and not afraid to say he needs me. I hope that the things I value are important to him, as well.”
Noah wasn’t sure where this conversation had come from, but he saw Fannie was serious about it. “I reckon I want a woman like my mother. She laughs a lot and she is always trying to feed us. No matter what troubles arise in our home, she has food to make it better. In my opinion, her cinnamon rolls do the most good.”
That coaxed a smile from Fannie. “Oatmeal-raisin cookies are my mother’s treatment for what ails us.”
“I suspect it’s the love that goes in more than the ingredients.”
“I’m sure you’re right.”
Paul came up to them, grinning from ear to ear. “I’ve just been hired for my first auction.”
Noah looked around. “Who would hire you?”
“The Englisch nurse. Her brother’s charity is holding an auction at the university where he teaches, and their auctioneer just canceled. I’ve got a job.”
“That’s wunderbar,” Fannie said, enjoying his eagerness. “What are they auctioning off and when is it?”
“I don’t know. I forgot to ask.” He dashed away, leaving Fannie and Noah grinning at each other.
“Are you ready to go home?” Noah held out his hand.
Fannie nodded and allowed him to help her to her feet. Together they folded the quilt and he tucked it under his arm. Side by side, they started toward the road that curved around the school.
His brother Samuel drove by, nodding to them with a knowing smile, but he didn’t offer them a lift. Noah tossed the quilt in the back of Samuel’s wagon as he went past. He was glad his brother hadn’t offered them a ride. Noah wanted to draw out this day with Fannie. He didn’t want to hurry it along in the least. She walked as slowly as he did.
“Don’t you have ball practice tonight?” She slanted a glance his way.
“It won’t hurt me to miss one practice.”
“It won’t?”
He smiled at her. “Not a bit.”
It was twilight by the time they reached the covered bridge. Inside the dark arch, he stopped. Fannie turned toward him. He took her face between his hands. “I’m thinking this might be the right time and the right place, Fannie Erb. Are you busy?”
“Not at all.” She closed her eyes and leaned toward him.
He pulled her close and kissed her. Gently at first, but with greater urgency when she responded in kind. The babbling of the river running beneath him, the sounds of the wind and the insects in the reeds all faded away until she was the only thing in his universe.
* * *
Any doubts Fannie had about her feelings for Noah vanished at the soft caress of his lips against hers. All she wanted was to move closer and closer still. She slipped her arms around his neck. He pulled her tight against him and held her in a powerful embrace. This wasn’t at all like their kiss in the garden. That had been the kiss of a brash boy. This was the kiss of a man.
Her heart was pounding and her head was spinning by the time he drew away, ending the sweetest moment of her life. He didn’t release her. He simply tucked her head beneath his chin and held her until his breathing slowed. “You are a remarkable woman, Fannie.”
“I’m happy you think so.”
“I’d better get you home.”
She looked up at him. “Do we have to go?”
“Ja, we have to.” He laid his arm across her shoulders and started walking with her tucked against his side.
“I’m not going to be busy all weekend,” she offered.
He chuckled. “I’ll keep that in mind.”
Fannie walked in silence beside him, unsure what to say. Did this mean anything? Was he ready to remain Amish? Was she? Where did they go from here?
As they reached her lane, a buggy came flying past them.
“Was that Hiram?” Fannie asked, catching a glimpse of the stern-faced young man as he pulled out without acknowledging them.
“I think it was,” Noah said.
“I wonder what he was doing at our place?”
“Maybe he’s selling your daed some pigs.”
She chuckled. “Let’s go find out.”
Before they reached the front door, Fannie saw her mother on the porch, weeping loudly as Fannie’s father tried to console her.
“Mamm, what’s wrong?” Fannie rushed to her side.
“I don’t know how I’ll ever be able to hold my head up in front of Hiram’s family again. I can’t believe she would do this to us.”
“What are you talking about?” Fannie couldn’t make sense of it.
Her father shook his head sadly. “Your sister has broken her engagement to Hiram. He had a letter from her today. She has met someone else in Florida.”
Fannie’s mother buried her face in her husband’s shirtfront. “
I never should have sent her to that place.”
Chapter Twelve
“I feel terrible. I don’t know what to do.” The next morning Fannie sat beside Noah on the bench in his mother’s flower garden overlooking the river behind his house. She wasn’t sure why she had gone to seek him out, but she needed to talk to someone.
“You couldn’t know this would happen.”
“It was all my idea. Now my sister’s life is ruined. Poor Hiram. I can’t imagine he will take her back. He must be humiliated. I was always making fun of him the way people made fun of me. How could I be so cruel?”
“I was as cruel in my comments as you were. The saving grace is that Hiram never heard our jests at his expense.”
“That doesn’t make them right.”
“I agree, but all we can do is move forward and behave better in the future. And your sister’s life is not ruined. It has taken an unexpected turn, that’s all.”
“I guess you’re right.”
“What are your parents going to do about Betsy? Are they sending you to take her place?”
“Mamm has gone to the phone shack to put a call through to my grandparents. Their landlady has a phone she lets them use. Once Mamm has had a chance to talk to them and to Betsy, she and Daed will decide what to do. If they want me to take her place, I will go. I’ve caused enough trouble for them.”
She jumped to her feet and pulled the head off a sunflower. “This was such a simple plan. We both said we weren’t hurting anyone. Why did it have to go so wrong? All I was trying to do was help my friend and look what happened.”
“I know you’re upset, Fannie, but I’d like to talk to you about last night.”
He meant the kiss. Was he going to say he was sorry and it never should have happened? She couldn’t bear to hear that from him. “I can’t, Noah. I can’t deal with one more thing.” Throwing the crushed yellow petals to the ground, she ran out of the garden and across the field toward home.
At the house, she paused to catch her breath before she went in. Opening the door, she found her mother in the kitchen. Her face was blotchy, but she wasn’t crying. Fannie sat in the chair beside her. “What did Grossmammi say? Did you speak to Betsy?”
Their Pretend Amish Courtship Page 14