by Liz Fielding
The rest of the day was taken up with settling her into her room and arranging the evening meal to her liking. Holly withdrew, not wanting to intrude on the family, and didn’t see them again until she went downstairs for supper.
Berta was there too, and Galina greeted her as an old acquaintance. Holly said little but her mind was working furiously. Instinct told her that she was under inspection.
At any other time she would have been amused at Matteo’s demeanour towards his mother, which was respectful. He might be a man of authority to the rest of the world, but he was nervous of his mamma. Now and then his eyes darted to Holly, as though checking whether she was making a good impression.
At last the meal was over. With relief, Holly suggested that it was time for Liza’s day to end.
‘Berta and I will bring her up later,’ Galina said. ‘Why don’t you go off duty?’
It was a dismissal and she had no choice but to accept it.
Perhaps the decision had gone against her, she thought. Hence the choice of Berta. This might even be her last night in the house. It wasn’t so very long ago that she had longed for the means to escape. Now she would have given anything to stay.
Just why she longed to stay was something she wasn’t quite sure about yet, but it was no matter. The decision was being taken out of her hands.
At last Galina arrived with Liza, already half-asleep. Together they put the child to bed and saw her nod off at once.
‘We did not mean to be so late,’ Galina said softly, ‘but Liza had a criminal matter she wished to discuss with her father.’
‘A criminal matter?’
‘Something to do with a book they were enjoying together.’ Her eyes twinkled. ‘Your doing, I fancy.’
‘Oh, I see. Yes, it’s a thriller.’
‘Then it’s definitely your doing. When I see my son deep in a thriller I know he’s come under a new influence. Of course, I already knew that.’
‘I don’t understand. How could you know?’
‘Because he talks of you so much. We telephone each other many times, and always he talks about you. Of course, he is very discreet, very proper. He tells me how good you are being to Liza, and how the child benefits from your care. And so I find myself curious about this wonderful person, and I decide I must meet her for myself. And now that we have met, I think I am starting to understand. I see how Liza loves you, how much good you’re doing her.’
‘But I wonder exactly what Matteo has told you.’
‘He has told me all I need to know. If there is more-he will tell me that too in his own good time. Let us leave it for now. I am pleased with what I find here. My son begins to look alive again and that is all I want after the way he has suffered.’ She added calmly, ‘Perhaps he is falling in love with you.’
‘Oh, no,’ Holly said quickly. ‘It’s much too soon for that.’
‘Too soon? Why?’
‘After the way he felt about her-’
‘You think he still has a rose-tinted view of his wife? I don’t think so.’
‘Even so, it was all so terrible-he has to get over the shock,’ Holly persisted.
‘You’re a wise woman. You will help him recover. And then-well…’
But Holly shook her head as caution swept her again.
‘There’s no question of it.’
‘So positive? He’s an attractive man with a good position in life, and you seem fond of his child. It wouldn’t be impossible that you might grow to love him.’
‘Yes, it would,’ Holly said firmly. ‘There are too many things in the way.’
‘You love someone else?’
‘I did once. Never again.’
‘I see. Well, I’m a nosy old woman, but I won’t pry any further.’
She was shrewd enough to leave it there, and over the next few days the house became a more cheerful place as her influence was felt. Emboldened, Berta gave in her notice, and departed, with a generous bonus, into Alfio’s arms.
There was a small dinner party in Galina’s honour, at which she kept Holly close to her, smiling contentedly in a way that made her wishes plain.
Holly tried not to spend too much time watching Matteo, unwilling to give substance to Galina’s suspicions. But her eyes strayed towards him too often for comfort, delighting not only in his looks but in his air of poise and authority, his calm detachment. He would speak to a guest, smiling enough to be polite, but the next moment he would retreat into the gentle melancholy that only she completely understood. Holly found a strange, disturbing pleasure in the thought that she knew the depths of him that were hidden from everyone else.
Yet she had no thought of marriage. Their closeness, half-sweet, half-bitter, was enough for the moment. She did not know if she should call it love. She no longer trusted herself on that subject. There was still an antagonism between them, as much on his side, she suspected, as on hers. It was nothing like the unsuspicious, uncritical joy she’d known with Bruno, but then, that hadn’t been love, and she never wanted to feel it again.
Could you be in love with a man whose kisses had thrilled you to the depths one minute, and whose harshness made you want to rage at him the next?
She came out of her reverie to realise that she’d heard a faint, unfamiliar noise. One of the other men put a hand in his pocket and took out his cell phone. She saw the change come over his expression as he stared at it, evidently reading a text.
‘Put the television on,’ he said quickly. ‘Get the news.’
In a moment they were indoors, crowded around the set, where an announcer was saying, ‘Nobody knows how Fortese acquired a gun, but he used it to great effect, shooting dead two prison guards before making his escape…’
‘Fortese,’ Holly whispered. ‘Isn’t he-?’
‘Yes,’ Galina said, beside her. ‘I have always been afraid that this would happen.’ Then she forced a smile. ‘But they will recapture him before he can-that is-’
‘Before he can come after Matteo,’ Holly said. ‘Of course they’ll recapture him. They must.’
‘They must,’ Galina agreed.
In silent dread they looked at each other.
CHAPTER TEN
EVERYTHING changed.
One moment they were enjoying a happy dinner party. The next the guests were saying goodbye, wishing Matteo good luck, but eager to get away.
Within half an hour a posse of police on motorcycles had arrived, ready to take up their positions in the judge’s defence. Matteo greeted them quietly. He had shown almost no reaction to the news, merely nodding calmly as though this were a normal part of life.
And for him it was, Holly realised.
She could barely take in the way life had changed out of all recognition. It might all have been a dream, except that the swarm of armed police made it horribly real. A man who already had several murders against him had set himself to kill Matteo, and was now on the loose, with a gun.
He could be anywhere. The only certain thing was that he wanted revenge and wouldn’t rest until he got it.
She went straight up to Liza’s room, relieved to find her asleep. She longed to talk to Matteo, just to look at him and see him standing there alive. But protecting the child from the knowledge of what was happening had to come first.
She did not even see Matteo again that night, but the next morning he spoke to her quietly before leaving.
‘Two of the police will be staying here, just in case Fortese gets ideas. All of you remain in the house and you’ll be quite safe.’
He departed with barely a nod, and her last sight of him was driving away, accompanied by four police outriders.
Between them she and Galina kept Liza occupied that day, so that she should notice as little as possible out of the ordinary. It took a lot of ingenuity, especially when Matteo returned in the evening, with a change of guard. But they managed.
Galina went to his study and stayed for an hour. When she came out she said to Holly in a strangely urgent
voice, ‘He wants to see you.’
She found him looking pale and strained. When he spoke his voice seemed to come from a distance, which contrasted strangely with his words.
‘I have to ask you a favour,’ he said sharply. ‘Not for myself, but for Liza.’
‘Of course.’
He looked uneasy, and seemed unable to look at her as he added, ‘It’s something only you can do for her.’
‘You know I’ll do anything she needs. Name it.’
‘Marry me.’ It came out almost as a bark.
She frowned. She’d heard the words, but didn’t divine their meaning.
‘What did you say?’
‘I want you to become my wife. For Liza’s sake.’
Light dawned. ‘Yes, I see. But there’s no need-I’m not going anywhere. I’ve promised you I’ll be here for her.’
At last he rose and faced her.
‘That’s not enough,’ he said urgently. ‘You need to be her mother-legally-so that nobody else can interfere.’
‘Matteo, what are you talking about? Why should anyone interfere?’
‘I mean-if I weren’t here…’
Like a thunderclap his meaning burst on her.
‘You mean Fortese-you actually think-?’
‘If he manages to kill me Liza will need you as never before. Holly, we have to be married, so that she can’t lose you as well. You’re her only hope if anything happens to me.’
‘Then don’t take the risk,’ she cried. ‘Go into hiding until they catch him.’
She thought she’d never seen so much passionate outrage in one human face.
‘Back off?’ he said in a voice whose softness didn’t disguise its vehemence. ‘Let the villains win? Can’t you understand that the only hope of defeating them is for people like me to face them, no matter what?’
‘But you have a child-’
‘We all have families, we’re all afraid, but if we run away then they’ve won. They take over, and what happens then to all the promises we made about protecting the world from them? What happens to our children in the world that we’ll bequeath them then? Holly, for the love of heaven, tell me that you understand!’
She nodded bleakly. ‘I do understand.’
‘If he comes after me, I’m ready for it. But what I won’t do-can’t do-is run away.’ He added with an icy bleakness that matched her own, ‘No matter what the cost.’
Holly tried to get away, but his hand on her arm was merciless.
‘It’s not like you to duck out,’ he said. ‘You’re stronger than that.’
‘I thought I was, but you’re asking me to jump off a great height into the unknown. I don’t know you. Much of the time I don’t even like you.’
‘You haven’t made a secret of that. But this isn’t about how we feel. It’s about Liza.’
‘So you said. You’ll get me to do for her what you should do, the way you always have. It’s all for Liza, because you know that’s the one argument that will move me. Just like a lawyer.’
‘I can’t help that. I am a lawyer-’
‘And like any good lawyer you know how to go for the jugular.’
‘All right, do it for me,’ he shouted. ‘Do it so that I can sleep at night knowing I’ve protected her future. Do it so that I don’t have nightmares thinking of her alone. That little girl has lost so much…first her mother, then her father-yes, she’s lost her father. I don’t mean the other one, I mean me. I try to do my duty by her, I know she’s innocent, but it isn’t here.’ He thumped his chest with his fist. ‘With your help I’m putting up a good pretence, but I can’t recreate the feeling-the joy I felt at just being with her, gazing at her, knowing that she was mine. I can’t give her the look she once saw in my eyes. I see her searching for it, puzzled that it’s missing, but there’s nothing I can do. Hate me for it. You can’t hate me as much as I hate myself. Think as badly of me as you like, but do this for her, and for me.’
‘Matteo, please-let me think, I need time-’
‘There isn’t any. I know it’s not fair to dump this on you. What a choice to face you with!’ His voice took on a note of grim humour. ‘You could be a rich widow in a very short time. Or, if you get really unlucky, you might be stuck with me for years.’
‘Stop it,’ she said fiercely.
‘I’m just trying to see it from your point of view.’
‘Do you think I want to make light of it?’ she demanded, beginning to be angry again. ‘Is that what you think of me?’
‘I’m trying to confront this the best way I can,’ he said, his voice rising again in its turn, ‘and you needn’t tell me I’m making a mess of it, because I know that. What is the right way? Shall I go down on one knee?’
‘Don’t you dare!’ she cried in horror. ‘I’d never forgive you.’
‘Then tell me how to persuade you.’
‘You can’t!’
‘I must. You’re the one person in the world that I can turn to, the only one I can rely on. You’re stronger than anyone I know. In some ways you’re stronger than me.’
‘But to suggest that we…Why me?’
‘Because there’s nobody else I can trust to protect Liza.’
‘Your mother-’
‘She’s an old lady, with a sick husband to care for. Apart from her my only family is a cousin that I can’t stand. She’s grim and hard, and hell will freeze over before I let Liza fall into her hands. Once you’re my wife I can make sure you’re her legal guardian if I’m killed.
‘Do this for me, Holly, I beg you. It doesn’t have to be a real marriage, just the legal formality, and I won’t ask more than that.’
‘Are you saying-?’
‘I’ll keep my distance, I swear it.’
Holly stood still, feeling herself trapped in the circle of his arms that had wound fiercely around her, almost like a steel cage. There was no escape, yet something perverse inside her persisted in fighting until the end.
‘I can’t-I can’t-’
‘You must, you must. I won’t let you go until you say yes. Holly, you have got to do this.’
She stared fixedly into his eyes, trying to read there something that would help her. But all she could see was a terrified determination to have his own way, and she was sure of it when he played his last and most unarguable card.
‘If it weren’t for Liza, think where you could be now. It wasn’t me who saved you. It was her, in those first few minutes on the train, telling them your name was Holly, screaming at them to go. You owe her.’
‘That’s a cheap shot,’ she flashed.
He shrugged, half releasing her. ‘Sure it is. I’ll be as cheap as I have to if it makes you say yes. I warned you I’m not a nice man when I want something. Cross me and I’ll fight until you give in. No holds barred.’
It was true. All his least likeable characteristics were on display because he reckoned they were his best weapons. At this moment, when he was asking her to be his wife, tossing his wealth and status into her lap, part of her disliked him as never before. The other part pitied him so that her heart ached.
And it was true. She owed the little girl everything.
‘All right,’ she murmured. ‘For Liza.’
As soon as the words were out she was filled with misgiving. But she was committed now.
He dropped his hands, but still looked at her intently. ‘You mean it? You won’t go back on that?’
‘I’ve given my word.’
Suddenly neither of them could think of anything more to say. They could only look at each other helplessly for a long moment, before opening the door, to find Galina, who’d been shamelessly listening. She was weeping with relief.
The whole household, down to the last gardener, entered into a conspiracy to prevent Liza learning about the situation. Radio and television sets were kept switched off and no newspapers entered the house.
‘All fear must be kept from her,’ Galina said heavily. ‘She must never know that her
father’s life is in danger.’
Like Matteo, Galina had accepted without question that it was her duty to carry on as normal. Holly marvelled at her courage. She wasn’t so sure of her own. Already she was a part of what was happening here, caught up in a fearful dream, with no end that she could see.
‘With all my heart I thank you for agreeing to become my son’s wife,’ Galina said to her. ‘Soon I must go home to my husband. I shall feel easier in my mind, knowing that you are here to take care of Matteo.’
‘I’m chiefly here to take care of Liza,’ Holly said quickly.
‘Yes, of course. He has explained that to me.’
‘I only hope that I can do all that Matteo expects of me.’
‘That depends whether you ever come to love him. You once implied that it was impossible.’
Galina’s tone contained a question, but Holly had no answer to give her.
‘I don’t know any more now than I did then,’ she sighed.
‘But you said you’d marry him.’
‘I had to. He wasn’t going to take no for an answer.’
‘That’s his way,’ Galina agreed. ‘You will have to be strong to stand up to him.’
‘He says that I am. He says in some ways I’m stronger than he is.’
‘I agree. I’m glad he understands himself, and you, so well. But strength isn’t enough, Holly. He will need your love. Please try to give it to him.’
She didn’t wait for a reply, but plunged deep into arrangements for the wedding. One of them was overseeing the preparation of the room that had once belonged to Carol, and which had been locked ever since. In no time Galina had an army of servants cleaning it out.
Holly felt slightly uncomfortable about this, but Galina said firmly, ‘You are the mistress now. You. Nobody else.’
‘But Galina-’
‘No ghosts,’ said her future mother-in-law. ‘Not in this house.’
Which left Holly wondering just how much Galina had guessed.
Matteo showed no emotion when he walked into the room and heard his mother’s plans. He merely nodded, thanked her and departed.
She had feared Liza’s reaction to the wedding. While part of her loved Holly, part of her still grieved for her mother, and Holly half expected her to be upset at seeing that mother supplanted. But Liza had smiled and hugged her, and Holly understood that the child had explained it all to herself in a way that satisfied her.