by Shouji Gatou
“And you’re very capable of sarcasm,” Tessa responded.
Takuma smiled and gazed down at the giant machine. “What do you think? They call it the Behemoth.” His voice had a monotone quality, as if his interest was only passing.
“You’re all mad,” Tessa retorted. “This thing has no purpose but destruction. There can’t be a strategic objective. It can only spread terror, like nuclear or chemical weapons.”
“Terror is our objective, Testarossa-san.”
She held her tongue.
“Personally, I’m not trying to get anything material out of this... It’s an act of expression,” Takuma explained. “Very minor self-expression. Within a year, most people will forget about it.”
“Like Takechi Seiji?” Kalinin said, and Takuma and the other men looked slightly surprised.
“That’s right,” Takuma replied after a moment’s silence. “That man was like a father to us, and the world needs to pay for rejecting him. That’s part of it. But that’s not the only reason... You don’t understand how we feel at all, do you?”
“Of course I don’t,” Kalinin retorted. “Besides, I would never even try to use something like that thing. It isn’t remotely practical.”
“That’s where you’re wrong. It’s invincible, when piloted by a chosen warrior like me. I’ll spread destruction and death and make Big Sister happy. And then I’ll be happy, too.” Takuma leaned over the railing with a bright smile. There was no particular malice in his expression, which just made it more unsettling. “Anyway, I’d better hurry up and get things ready. I’ve heard the police are on the way, with a squad of JSDF ASes. We can be sure now that they’ve taken no measures to fight our Behemoth, so we have no further need to question you.”
“Stop this, Takuma,” Tessa begged. “It’s not too late.”
“But it is too late, Testarossa-san. I really did like you. But it’s time to say goodbye.” Takuma didn’t give an order, exactly, but the men used that moment to take aim with their guns.
They’re going to shoot us, Kaname realized. The moment that thought entered Kaname’s mind, a roar filled the cargo hold.
It was the shockwave from an explosion. The entire ship shook. It had come from somewhere on the ship—perhaps beneath it. It felt like a hit from a torpedo.
The floor tilted hard to the left. Various things inside the room slid, rolled, and toppled toward the port side. The enemies on the catwalk lost their balance and had to cling to the handrail.
Kaname cried out as she fell and slammed her back against a mini-crane.
“Hide!” Kalinin shouted as he sprang into action, running at full tilt while practically carrying Tessa.
Kaname could see human figures on the catwalk readying their guns again. If I stay here, I’ll be shot, she realized, and in that instant, her body began to move on its own. Half-crawling, half-tumbling, she began to get her distance.
Bullets rained down, and sparks flew from every direction. She let out a series of panicked cries as she moved, then hid behind the closest thing she could find: a small compressor.
The sound of gunshots continued on the other side of the hold; Kalinin was probably trading fire with them. He and Tessa seemed to have retreated in the opposite direction, so there was no way for her to join back up with them.
She was isolated. The ship was rocking. Bullets were flying all around her. It was hell.
Kaname felt seized by terror, a sense of powerless, like an astronaut on a spacewalk whose lifeline had just been cut. She had no weapons, nowhere to run. What could she do all by herself? What can I do? Wh-Wh-What... do, dododo...
“Huh?” she breathed. She’d heard a strange voice in her ears. Her heart was pounding so hard she could feel the pulse in her neck. Beyond it, she could hear someone whispering to her. Fif-fine... fineineine, it’ll be fine. Inein. Coming.
“What?” she said. “Again?” The sound of a loud ricochet close to her caused the voice to vanish. Kaname let out a yelp. She couldn’t stay here.
Desperate and confused, she ran along the wall of the cargo hold. She tripped over a cable, banged into a steel pillar, and nearly fell. The rocking was awful. After managing not to get hit by any bullets, she hid behind a toolbox as large as a desk, took in a breath, and cried, “Why does everything happen to me?!” No answer came.
Instead, one of the enemies vaulted a piece of machinery and began heading in Kaname’s direction. He wore a combat uniform and a mask. He must have known that she was unarmed; maybe he thought it would be easier to finish her at close range than to keep shooting at her while she was on the run.
Kalinin and Tessa were on the other end of the cargo hold; there was no way they’d be able to help her. If she tried to run, she’d be shot in the back. Realizing that, Kaname reached into the toolbox beside her, pulled out a large wrench, and threw it as hard as she could, in desperation. The soldier was hit in the shoulder and cried out, reeling back in surprise from her unexpected reaction.
“Okay, you asked for it!” She picked up a crowbar as long as her arm and, while teetering under the weight, charged at him with it. For some reason, the man didn’t shoot her, but just waved a hand in panic. It was like he was saying “stop,” but...
“Take this!” She swung the crowbar at him. The masked man just barely managed to block the strike with his rifle, but the momentum carried and struck him in the neck. The man staggered, but kept his balance, tenaciously.
“Why, you...!” She hit him again. This time, the rifle warped. The man dropped it, fell backward, and slammed into an iron pillar behind him.
“W-Well? You want another whack?!” Kaname shouted, readying the crowbar for another strike. Her legs were trembling, and she was about to weep out of fear, but she ignored all of it.
The man shook his head and held up both hands in surrender. “You really are full of mysteries,” he said at last.
Kaname started. “What are you—”
“It’s me, Chidori.” The man took off his mask and slowly picked himself up.
As Kaname caught the face in the dim light, she let the crowbar clatter to the floor. “Sousuke?”
On the other side of the cargo hold, the firefight was still raging. The ship’s rocking wasn’t as violent as before, but now there was an eerie creaking sound moving through the hull. Her head was pounding from the sound of gunshots and ricochets echoing all around. She could be shot from any direction at any time, and it was much too soon to relax.
Nevertheless, she threw herself into his arms.
She wasn’t even thinking; it just happened. She had been so afraid, and she was so happy that he was okay. She couldn’t possibly be self-conscious in this moment; she’d just wanted something to cling to so badly.
“Chidori?” Sousuke said.
She could sense his confusion. Holding back sobs, Kaname explained herself, “I was so scared.”
“I’m sorry,” he apologized.
“I was worried, okay?”
“I’m sorry about that, too.”
“Idiot...” Kaname grumbled. “I almost died like a million times...”
Just then, Sousuke pulled out his pistol and fired two shots overhead. Two enemies, standing on the catwalk and aiming for them, screamed and fell; their bodies landed behind a distant compressor. Then, still holding Kaname, Sousuke said, “Please continue.”
Kaname’s jaw dropped. She released her hold on Sousuke, suddenly feeling vaguely silly. “I guess it’s really not the time for this, huh?”
“Hmm. I suppose not,” he answered. Amid the clamor and vibrations, the two quickly took shelter again.
“So,” Kaname asked, “how did you get here?”
“We located you right away,” Sousuke told her casually. “We infiltrated from the sea.”
“Oh. So what’s causing the rocking?” she asked. “And what was that big explosion earlier?”
“Ah,” he nodded simply. “That was the bomb we set. You seemed to be in trouble, so we de
tonated it immediately. The ship will likely sink soon.”
“Sheesh... you don’t do subtle, do you?”
“It was merely efficient,” Sousuke answered. “It will provide a distraction and take out the enemy equipment at the same time.”
Sensible indeed—assuming they could get off the ship themselves. “But... you said ‘we,’ right?” Kaname asked. “Who else is with you?”
“Mao and Kurz.”
“Aha.” Kaname knew them. They were Sousuke’s comrades, and quite capable.
“The enemy won’t be able to focus on us right now. Let’s get out of here.” Sousuke took Kaname’s hand and began to run.
The floor pitched abruptly, and Takuma went shoulder-first into the wall. He moaned as he banged his head, then stumbled, and clutched at the railing. Sporadic firefights were breaking out on the other end of the hold; his heart sank as he realized that the ship was going down.
I won’t be able to activate the Behemoth, he realized. I’ve lost my chance to climb inside, to move it, to show my power. What was the point of all of this, then? Big Sister... There was a pain in his temple. The impact before must have broken the skin. There was a little blood. Red blood. My blood. It hurts...
“Takuma.” Seina and one of their comrades came running toward him across the catwalk.
“Big Sister?” Takuma asked, bewildered.
“What are you doing?” she demanded. “Get in the cockpit! We’re going to activate the Behemoth.”
“But... it’s too late,” he protested. “And I just got hurt...”
“Don’t whine about a little bump on the head. It won’t stop you from piloting.”
“But it hurts...” Takuma whimpered.
Seina grabbed him by the collar and pulled him in close.
“Ah...”
“Get inside,” she ordered. “We’re going to activate it. Protect the Behemoth.”
“Big Sister. But I...”
I’m injured, Takuma thought. Aren’t you worried about me? Is the Behemoth more important to you than I am? I became its operator to make you happy... I endured all those awful things... I never really cared about old man Takechi, I just felt bad for you, because you were the person closest to him. Big Sister...
“Do you realize how many people have died to get you here?” Seina asked.
I don’t care.
“Don’t you realize you’re worth nothing unless you pilot it?”
Stop it. If you don’t—
“If you run away now,” she told him coldly, “I won’t need you anymore.”
The world around Takuma went black. I thought I was loved. I thought we didn’t need the Behemoth. And yet... I’m the one who’s not needed. Not needed. I...
I’m just the operator, he realized. I’m another of the Behemoth’s working parts. That’s all I am to her...
“Understand?” Seina demanded. “Then get in there. He’ll help you. I’ll get it powered up and ready to go. Hurry.” Ignoring the gaping hole she had just opened up inside Takuma, Seina slid down the ladder and ran over to the Behemoth’s far side.
The comrade who remained with him slapped Takuma on the shoulder. “Get it together, okay? And hurry! The ship’s going down!” At the man’s prodding, Takuma listlessly began to walk.
Sousuke and Kaname dashed to the cargo hold’s entrance, where they ran into Kalinin and Tessa. They must have just given the enemy the slip, as well.
“Sagara-san?” Tessa breathed in open surprise.
“I’m sorry our assistance came so late,” Sousuke apologized.
“Ah...” Tessa held her breath for a moment, then gave him a pretty smile—which she quickly restrained. She looked like she wanted to throw herself into his arms—but she seemed to hold herself back from that, too. She just straightened up, averted her eyes, and said, “I’m pleased that you’re safe. I’m no longer angry about the schoolyard incident.” Her tone was light and breezy.
Sousuke was dumbstruck for a moment. Then he said, “I... I’m grateful.”
“What did you do to her, Sergeant Sagara?” Kalinin asked. Each man had reason to think that the other was dead, but neither showed any sign of joy at the reunion; this was standard fare for them, after all.
“Er. I...” As Sousuke struggled over what to say, Kalinin just shook his head.
“You can explain later,” he told the younger man. “For now, take those two and escape.”
“Yes, sir. What about you, Major?”
Kalinin turned back to the hold’s cargo, his face pale and haggard. His wounds were serious, and they seemed to have taken a toll on his stamina. “There’s... something I need to do,” he replied. “Go on without me.”
“I’m happy to go instead, if you so order,” Sousuke offered.
“No... that’s all right.”
Showing no further concern, Sousuke did as he was told.
Kalinin turned back to Tessa. “Colonel, you should escape if you can. I intend to stop the Behemoth from activating.”
“It’s too dangerous,” Tessa protested. “Besides, the ship’s sinking should take care of it. You should—”
“It’s just a precaution,” Kalinin said, cutting her off. “Don’t worry about me. And if it does activate... you need to be as far away as possible.”
Tessa said nothing.
“I’ll catch up with you later.” Kalinin checked the remaining bullets in his gun, then turned back to the cargo hold.
“Let’s go, Colonel.” Sousuke readied his gun and broke into a run, leading Kaname and Tessa down the corridor.
The ship’s tilt was getting worse. The hold itself was beginning to take on water.
“I told you to hurry! What’s the matter with you?” Half dragged by the other man, Takuma climbed up the armor of the colossal Behemoth. When he reached the summit of the mountain-like machine, he swiveled the lever at his feet to open the cockpit. The complex hatch meshes slid open with a pressurized hiss: first the secondary armor, then the primary.
“Get to it, Takuma!” his comrade shouted, over the sound of mercury lamps and metal pipes raining down from above. “Moving this thing is all you’re good for, so make it count, okay?!”
Takuma said nothing.
“Well? I can’t hear you!” He gave him a light cuff on the head, and Takuma gave him a small nod in response. “Eesh. What a freak...” the man spat, then quickly moved to descend the machine. Takuma pulled a pistol from his belt, pointed it at the man’s back and fired.
The man started. As he turned around to look at him in shock, Takuma fired three more shots into him. The man lost his balance and plummeted down the machine, its dark red armor seeming to drink in the fresh blood.
“Don’t act like we’re friends, you incompetent,” Takuma spat, before taking out a disposable syringe. He knew very well where his veins were. Unceremoniously, he plunged the needle into his arm, and injected the liquid inside. The ritual was over.
I’m going to pilot it. I have no other choice, Takuma told himself. I’m a part of the Behemoth. This is the only place I belong. That cockpit is all there is in the world. I don’t care what happens after this. I’ll move that greedy devil however it wants me to... spreading destruction and flames...
“Hold it,” a voice behind him said. He turned to see a Caucasian man, done up in bandages, pointing a pistol at him. This was the man they had been holding on the ship, Testarossa’s comrade.
“I can’t let you get inside that thing. Step over to me, slowly.” The man held out a hand. His gun was still pointed right at Takuma. But... he could sense a deep exhaustion on the man’s bearded face. The strain of coming this far seemed to have reopened his wounds; he might die soon, just on his own.
“And if I say no?” Takuma asked.
“I’ll shoot you,” Kalinin told him flatly.
“But I don’t have a choice,” Takuma protested. “I have nowhere else to go.”
“I don’t show mercy,” Kalinin answered, “even to children.�
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If that were the case, you wouldn’t have given a warning, Takuma thought. Is he being sentimental? No, that attitude suggests—
“Throw the gun away.” Seina was standing on the catwalk just ten meters from the Behemoth. She had a submachine gun aimed at the man’s head.
But you’re not trying to save me, are you, Big Sister? You just want me to pilot the Behemoth. That’s all it is, isn’t it?
“You, eh?” the man said, without lowering his gun.
“I won’t let you stop him,” Seina answered.
“Activating this thing won’t change anything,” Kalinin said.
“We’ve been through this before,” she countered. “I’m not out to change things.”
“Then you sound like a spoiled child,” he accused.
“I don’t want to shoot you, either, you know.”
This exchange... Takuma felt that he’d heard something like it a long time ago. When was it?
“Then don’t,” Kalinin said simply. Perhaps the man’s exhaustion was reaching its limit. His right hand moved. Two gunshots rang out.
Takuma felt a dull impact in his side. It felt, at first, like a strike from a fist, but the sensation was followed a moment later by a sharper, burning pain. It occurred to him that he’d been shot. From a corner of his eye, he could see the man toppling over. A spray of blood had burst from his back. Big Sister had shot him.
Whimpering, Takuma crawled across the Behemoth’s armor, heading for the cockpit hatch. The fallen man was trying to use the last of his strength to shoot him again.
Just then, the ship rocked. The man bounced down the slope of armor, and fell onto the platform below. The ship creaked, and the catwalk broke in two. Seina lost her balance and gripped the railing, but she was struck by a falling ventilation duct. Crushed under the large pipe, she vanished from sight.
“Big Sister...?” I should go help her... Takuma thought, then realized how foolish he was being. She wouldn’t want that. Besides, he was injured. Even if he abandoned the Behemoth now, he couldn’t save her. The nihilism that had been gnawing away at his heart for years told him that she must be dead.