by D. M. Turner
“I don’t even remember killing Brimfield.”
“Based on scent traces, five.”
“I have memory of two.”
“Do you remember Sophia coming out here?”
He shook his head without looking at his friend and swallowed an instant lump of fear that lodged in his throat. “I could’ve killed her. As it was… I hurt her. I still taste her blood.” Lifting his hands out slightly to his sides, he glanced down at himself. “Some of the blood on me is hers.”
“You think you injured her?”
Ian nodded.
“Ian, she was already hurt after helping Tanya and Max. You didn’t do that to her. I saw her wounds when she came to our aid. Other than being bloodier when she came back with you, which I’m sure running caused, she wasn’t more seriously injured than she’d been when she got out here to begin with. Neither were you, for that matter.” Brett frowned. “Whatever she did to get you back in control of your wolf, it wasn’t a fight.”
Relief tempered lingering panic, and he closed his eyes and lowered his head. “I was so sure I’d been the one to hurt her.” He took a deep breath then opened his eyes and glanced at his friend. “It was worse than Germany this time. I remember all of that. Those deaths run together, but I was aware of what was going on, even if I rationalized myself into not stopping it. This was different.”
“I know.” Brett’s gaze skipped off toward the trees along the driveway. “The look in your eyes… it was like Brady.” He shook his head. “You weren’t like that in Germany. That was some serious anger then, along with grief and a need for justice. This….” He shrugged. “Savagery is the only way I can think to put it. Like a wild animal that’s totally out of its mind. Pure instinct and rage.”
He shivered. Yes. Just like Brady. The alpha before him that he’d had to kill. His friend. Let it go. “How did Sophia know I was in trouble?”
A short pause followed, then Brett turned and met his gaze with steady scrutiny. “I sent Colin for her.”
“You?”
“I hoped she could get you back. I knew I couldn’t, and I really didn’t want to kill you, if I could avoid it.” He grinned. “I don’t want your job.”
Despite himself, Ian barked a short, sharp laugh. Though Brett was serious about not wanting to be alpha, Ian had no doubt friendship had been the driving force behind his second’s decision to bring Sophia into the situation. He sobered. “I could’ve killed her.”
“But you didn’t.”
“I could have.”
“But you didn’t,” Brett repeated more emphatically. “Life is full of could-haves. They’re irrelevant in the grand scheme of things. All we’re left with is what we did. Good, bad, or indifferent.” He laid a hand on Ian’s shoulder. “In this case, it’s good. You’re back, and you didn’t kill her.”
As tempting as it was to dwell on the horrific possibilities, Ian had to concede to his friend’s point. Could-haves were more constructive when trying to learn from a bad decision so better decisions were made in the future, not so much for living in fear of what had not happened in the past.
He owed Sophia an apology for yelling at her.
“Can I ask how she got you back?”
“I have no idea.” Ian frowned. “I just woke up with her blood and fur in my mouth. She was holding very still in my teeth. I don’t know what happened.” He suppressed a shudder. Don’t think about it. She was already wounded. You didn’t do it, and you didn’t kill her when you had the chance. No reason to mention to his friend that he’d mounted her. At least it hadn’t gone beyond a simple dominance display. If he’d— Stop it. Just. Stop. You didn’t harm her. Keep at it, and you’ll prove the pack females are right about you. “Brett?”
“Yeah?”
“Are you aware the females in the pack think I’m like some tragic, classical fiction hero?”
Brett chuckled. “Yes. Dark, brooding, and mysterious.”
He sighed. “Great. I had hoped Colin was jesting.”
“Afraid not.” He cocked his head and turned a questioning look on Ian. “How do you feel?”
“A bit stiff, but that’s receding. As for the other… I’m still on edge and unsettled.” Though that might have more to do with the damage he may have done to his relationship with his mate than the fact he’d lost control.
“You probably need food and rest.” Brett grimaced. “I think we all could use both, but I’m not sure we’ll get the latter until clean-up is done. It would probably be a good idea to get all this blood taken care of before dawn. If a helicopter or low-flying plane passes over, we don’t need someone coming to investigate what appears to be the site of a massacre.”
“Appears?” Ian cocked a brow.
“You know what I mean.” Brett frowned. “Besides, they attacked us on our territory. I’d say this was a massacre attempt that turned out bad for the attackers.”
He nodded. “I’m not sure human law would necessarily see it that way these days, but true enough.”
“Ian!”
The panic in Jeremy’s voice sent a chill up Ian’s spine. Oh, no. Now what? He turned to face the house.
The doctor stood at the far corner.
Had that not-enemy wolf proven to be an enemy after all?
“Come quick! It’s Sophia!”
His breath caught.
Brett grabbed his arm when he would’ve broken into a run. “I’ll go through the house and make sure the door on the first floor is secure so she can’t get into the house.”
Ian nodded and rushed toward the outside basement entrance. When he rounded the landing at the bottom of the stairs and stopped in the open doorway, his heart pounded heavily in his throat.
Sophia was still in wolf form, standing in the middle of the room with her back to the outside door, head up, tail up and puffed out, a ridge of hair standing straight on end down her back. Blood still dripped from her coat, leaving spots on the concrete. Her wounds didn’t appear serious, but a wolf that wasn’t healing properly didn’t need injuries to be serious in order to bleed to death.
Her mouth was open in both pant and snarl. She stank of pain and anger. A growl emanated from her chest. Her eyes were locked on Kelly and Donna, who were in human form, kneeling on the concrete floor only a few feet in front of her.
Donna had her gaze firmly on the floor. Tension made her body quiver, as though she was braced to bolt at the slightest provocation.
Kelly wasn’t fully avoiding eye contact with the enraged wolf.
Tommy, in his half-grown wolf form, hugged the floor in the doorway of the vault containing the younger pups. His eyes were wide, and he trembled visibly.
“What happened?”
The wolf startled then swung her butt sideways and backed toward the work counter running along one wall. Amber eyes shifted from Kelly to Ian. That untamed look was back. Then her head turned to face the kennel and vaults on the far wall, presumably so she could keep an eye on threats from both sides. She took another couple of steps backwards. Three or four more feet would put her under the work counter.
“What triggered this?”
“I have no idea.” Kelly kept her voice soft and low, though it was tight enough to snap. “She came unglued all of a sudden. None of us did or said anything to cause it.”
Ian didn’t miss the defensive edge to that last statement. “Sophia.” He had little hope that she’d recognize the word, much less respond to him calling her name.
No response. Not so much as the flick of an ear in his direction.
One of the infants started to cry, drawing the wolf’s gaze toward the far vault beyond Kelly and Donna.
Ears pinned and her head lowered, she growled.
Kelly moved as though to get to her feet, and the wolf’s full attention instantly shifted to her.
The growl deepened, and more pearly white teeth showed.
The woman froze.
“Enough!” Ian moved into the room. He had to keep her focus
on him instead of the others.
To his satisfaction, she turned fully to face him.
He motioned with a slight flick of the fingers of one hand for Kelly and Donna to back toward the vault. Donna moved first, staying low and moving slowly and quietly.
“That’s it. Watch me.” They needed to secure her, so the others were safe, and then they’d see about bandaging those wounds and getting her to eat. He might have to pin her to the floor as he’d done when she’d gone after Brett days before. Injured as she was, that wouldn’t be pleasant. He might hurt her more than she already was. No choice though.
Her growl deepened, but she stood her ground and lowered her head further when he took a couple of slow steps toward her. The feral gleam in amber eyes intensified, if that was even possible.
Okay. So we’re not going to settle this without a physical confrontation again. He sighed.
“Jeremy?” He kept his gaze steady on hers, refusing to look away from the challenge in those wild eyes.
“Yes, sir?”
“Are you inside?”
“Yes, sir.”
“Close the outside door. I don’t want her getting out of here. The inner gate is open.” She’d have no trouble jumping the outer wall. They couldn’t risk her getting free and reaching Flagstaff.
The door banged shut.
Out of the corner of his eye, Ian saw Kelly use the slam of the outside door to cover up the sound of her pulling the vault door closed. Some of the tension left his body. The women and children were safe. Hopefully Brett had closed the upstairs access. If so, the only open door led straight into the kennel. Sophia couldn’t do any harm in there, except possibly to herself.
“Alright, my love. It’s just you and me now.” Ian trusted Jeremy to stay back. Then he realized what he’d said. My love. God help him. It was true. If something happened to her…. She’d pulled him back from the brink of destruction. He had to do the same for her. “I’m not giving up on you, but I won’t let you hurt anyone else.”
Another step closer, and she snapped her teeth in warning.
Ian crouched, keeping his head up but making his form smaller. If he could ease close enough…. “You know you can’t scare me or make me back down. We’ve had this discussion a couple of times already. You might as well hang it up now.” Though she wouldn’t understand the words, he hoped she’d recognize the firm but soft tone and respond to it.
Had the pain of her injuries pushed Sophia into mental retreat, or had it been something else? Something he’d said? She couldn’t be more seriously wounded than she appeared, or she’d have bled out already.
As the standoff continued, Ian inched closer and became aware of the fact the wolf was weakening.
Her legs trembled, as though finding it difficult to support her weight. Panting grew heavier, too.
Close enough to lunge for her. Perfect.
As though she read his thoughts or guessed his intentions, she gathered herself to launch, her whole body shaking.
He wasn’t sure how much strength she could put into an attack, but he had no desire to find out.
Ian grabbed for her, aiming for the fur on either side of her jowls so he’d have control of her head. One hand found its target. The other missed.
She didn’t. The wolf’s teeth closed on his wrist, drawing blood.
He ignored the pain and allowed his momentum to carry him forward and push her off her feet.
Her legs collapsed, unable to withstand the extra weight. She released his arm as she fell.
In moments, he’d pinned her body under his and grasped her muzzle to prevent another bite. His face hovering over her head, he stayed in her line of sight so she’d know who had her, hoping she’d submit and not get hurt further.
The wolf emitted a series of grunts followed by a soft, pained whine. Then she went still, breathing heavily. Muscles relaxed in surrender.
Ian shifted his weight so it wasn’t fully resting on her. No need to risk crushing her.
She flinched and groaned.
He winced, knowing he’d caused more pain. “Jeremy? Do you have an ACE bandage handy?”
“You bet.” The doctor approached slowly then knelt beside them with a leather bag. He opened the bag and pulled out a rolled bandage.
Sophia’s eye rolled to watch him, but she made no effort to break free. No sound either other than heavy breathing through her nose.
“Use it to make a muzzle. I don’t want to risk her biting while you bandage her wounds, and you can’t exactly do your job with me lying across her like this.”
With Ian’s help, Jeremy fashioned and applied a muzzle using the long bandage.
Other than a couple of soft growls, Sophia was still and quiet, submitting to it.
Certain she could no longer bite, Ian lifted his weight off of her completely, prepared to drop back down if she tried to run.
She only lay there.
It took both of them working together to find and bandage the wolf’s wounds.
“If she’d returned to human form, this would be so much simpler,” Jeremy grumbled softly, shaking his head. “Dealing with all that bloody fur sure makes things more difficult. There’s a reason I’m a doctor and not a vet. I prefer patients without fur.” He sat back on his heels. “Hopefully we haven’t missed anything.”
The heavy vault door behind Ian screeched faintly, warning him that it opened.
Donna’s gentle voice reached his ears next. “Is it safe to come out?”
Good question. The wolf had been subdued throughout medical care, but there was no guarantee she’d stay that way, especially after she’d eaten and healed some.
Ian glanced toward the kennel. “Give me a minute.” He gathered Sophia’s wolf into his arms, climbed to his feet, and carried her into the kennel. “Jeremy, close the gate behind me, and someone hand me a blanket or something so she doesn’t have to lay on the bare concrete.”
The gate slammed shut.
He laid her on the floor and stepped back. Her eyes were closed, but he couldn’t tell whether she’d fallen asleep or lost consciousness. Hopefully the former, but either was possible given exhaustion and blood loss in addition to her continued underweight state.
“Here, Ian.” Donna offered a thick blanket through the bars. “If you fold it a couple of times, it should give her decent protection from the cold, hard floor.”
He did as she’d suggested then picked up a limp wolf and laid her back down on the warm blanket. Sure of the safety of everyone else, he removed the makeshift muzzle and tossed it toward the front of the cage.
Donna knelt, reached through the bars, snagged the bandage, and pulled it out of the kennel.
“Are you coming out?”
“No.” Ian sat on a corner of the blanket and leaned his back against a cold steel wall. “I’m staying with her awhile. Someone bring her something to eat.”
“I’ll bring something for both of you.”
Good enough. He smiled faintly and leaned his head against the wall.
Chapter 32
Ouch! Sophia froze. Sharp pain, shoulder, neck. Dull ache, back, ribs, undercarriage. And her legs felt… numb. Warmth radiated through the fur and skin along her spine. What the heck?
Memory pushed through the lingering fog of unconsciousness. Oh, yeah. Fight. Two wolves had tried their best to kill her, but she’d won. All that running… Ian… no, he hadn’t bitten to cause injury. He’d grabbed her. Then he’d reverted to human form and yelled at her. Sent her away…. A pang touched her heart.
She opened her eyes.
A large bowl a couple of feet away came into focus first. Then solid metal bars filled her field of vision. Familiar… the kennel in the basement. How had she gotten in there?
A spike of adrenaline jacked up her heart rate. Oh, no. It happened again. Did I hurt anyone?
An attempt to lift her head sent agony from the wound in her neck and shoulder. She grunted and let her body go boneless, panting through the pain
. Even if she hadn’t hurt, trying to move had made her aware of how weak she was. Vulnerable… at the mercy of any threat. Panic threatened.
“Sophia?” Familiar voice. Ian.
The source of warmth at her back moved.
Every muscle tensed, inducing agony. Stars and lightning flashed through vision that tried to go dark again. Sophia forced her body to relax. Relax. Breathe. Don’t fight. The pain eased again but didn’t entirely go away.
Ian crawled into her range of sight and knelt with his upper body resting on his elbows on the floor. He wore only a pair of blue jeans. Dried blood smeared his skin in places, as though he’d tried only halfheartedly to wipe it away. His gray eyes focused on hers, he sighed softly, and a relieved smile canted the right side of his mouth. “Glad you’re back.”
Had she hurt anyone? She whined softly.
“I know it hurts. You need food so your body has the energy to heal.” He sat up and reached behind him. The big bowl. He set it at his side and pulled a piece of meat out of it, holding it in front of her nose.
Sophia tucked her nose slightly toward her chest.
“A ghràidh, you must eat.” He reached out with his free hand to stroke her head.
She growled. Now he wanted to be Mr. Nice Guy? He’d yelled at her, more than once, and sent her away. Did he think she’d forgotten?
Wait. What had he said before ordering her to eat? Were her ears not working right? Maybe she’d taken a blow to the head or something while the wolf was in control. His tone had been remarkably gentle, but the word made no sense.
Ian stilled and lowered his hand without touching her. Then his head fell forward, his chin almost resting on his chest. He sighed then met her gaze. “I don’t blame you for being angry. I shouldn’t have yelled at you.”
No, you shouldn’t. I didn’t do anything wrong. She glared at him, hoping to relay in a look what she was unable to vocalize.
“I know. You saved my life, and I acted like a real jerk.”
Close enough, and true.
“When I regained control, I—” He frowned. “Can we possibly have this discussion two-way?” The scowl deepened. “Then again, it might be a bad idea for you to Shift right now. The pain might overwhelm your already weak system.” His hand eased in front of her nose. “Please eat.”