by John Hook
The Shade yanked me painfully toward the doors of the tower.
‘What are you doing?” The Manitor spoke evenly.
“I’m going to show our guest why his cause is hopeless.”
“I don’t think that is a good idea.”
“What do you care?” the Baron snapped, frustrated at being interrupted.
“She was very clear. He is not to enter the tower.”
“The bloody angel.” The contempt in the Baron’s voice was clear. He threw me back against the wall and kicked me hard, breaking ribs. The pain blinded me. He pressed me up against the wall. His face, though truly an inhuman mask of metallic sand, was filled with fury.
“I guess I’m going to have to find other ways to convince you of how hopeless your situation is unless you hand over your power.”
“I’m going to find a way to kill you,” I said and winked. It came out more like “M go fin why ki ya,” but I think the Shade understood. My shattered jaw wasn’t up to well-formed speech.
“Why? You don’t even want the power. You could save all of your friends. I will give you Philip and as long as you go and never leave Rockvale, no one needs to get hurt again.”
I glared at him. The message was clear.
“Eventually, you will break.” Baron Steel formed a small needle in his hand. “I can go very long without ever hitting anything vital enough to turn you into a proto.”
The baron wasn’t as impatient as Janovic. I was likely about to find out how much a glamour body could endure and for how long. I wasn’t going to like the answer. I was just hoping Izzy and Blaise wouldn’t return because they would not be able to handle the Manitor, but they would most certainly try.
Unexpectedly, there was a change in the quality of light. At first I thought it was a hallucination from the pain. Then I saw the baron reacting to it too.
“Stop! What are you doing?”
The voice appeared in my mind, but it wasn’t a demon voice. It was a strangely sweet yet commanding voice. The Shade turned, startled. So did the Manitor. A light appeared and there in the middle of it floated the angel. She was a beautiful blonde woman with almost transparent golden veils over a perfectly formed body. She seemed to be the embodiment of beauty and grace. However, in my peripheral vision, if I didn’t look directly at her, I sensed something else. What that something else was I couldn’t fathom and I couldn’t even get my mind to create an image for it. Whatever she was or wasn’t, she or it was dangerous.
The Shade was clearly unhappy as he wrenched me from the wall and threw me in the angel’s path. I almost fell but managed to catch myself and painfully stood my ground. I looked into her eyes. They were alien eyes. There was no humanity in them for all the beauty she exhibited, real or not. The angel floated up to me. The strange contrast of the chaos of my nervous system and this heavenly vision left me almost unable to think. She stepped close and touched my face. I could smell a sweet scent, but it didn’t feel right.
“You can’t break me,” I managed to mutter unintelligibly, and then immediately realized that it was an unfortunate choice of words for a literal-minded magical being. I could hear the snaps as the jagged ends of my bones tore through the flesh of my arms and legs. I didn’t fall and I realized I was being held by a claw that was sunk into my chest. The world was becoming less brightly lit and there were others there, but I couldn’t see them. And then I was flying through the air with the angel. Or was it her? She looked different. Fierce. Her wings spread, her face distorted as I sailed over wooded mountains.
“You are right.” I heard in my head “You will never stop. You are too dangerous to leave.”
I remember thinking that I couldn’t figure out why I was so dangerous.
However it was too late for an answer. I was watching her hold my heart in her claw as I raced toward the ground. She crushed it, blood and flesh splashing the sky above me. Then everything dissolved and I was swallowed up.
13.
Screaming.
That’s the first thing I recall. Screaming and painful flashes of light. And a rushing sound that spun around and around me. It was like I was surrounded in a bubble and all the sound was somewhere out there in the distance. In here it was quiet, but there was visual chaos.
It was hard to tell what I was experiencing. There were light areas and dark areas. There were edges and shadows. There were blooms of color: green, brown, yellow and purple. There were damp smells. There were sweet smells. There were deeply sour smells. However, none of these had any connection among them.
I tried to focus on more than one element, but it made my head hurt. The rushing sound was getting louder, even though it still seemed somewhere far away. Light and edges and color began to go into motion, rotating, some elements in parallel and some in their own random orbits. They began spinning, round and round, faster and faster, the light hurting me. Or maybe it was me spinning and the great, chaotic, unformed world was still, like stars in the night.
The swirl started to congeal at my feet into a whirlpool. At first I thought I was going to be sucked down into it, into an abyss. Instead, as the swirling rose, it left in its wake solidified and more stable perceptions, like water filling a basin. The world at the ground began to stop spinning and take shape, and then form, and then texture and then color. There was dirt and rock, and there were my feet.
The great whirlpool rose and there were grasses and bushes and my legs. It rose more and there were bigger shrubs and bigger rocks and my hips and waist. Then bushes and tree trunks and a cliff wall beginning to form and my chest. Then the sky and my head and all of my senses were flooded with a new and congealed world and I was running. Now the screaming came louder and louder and I realized it was me. I was running and screaming.
I didn’t know why. I felt strong. I didn’t know who I was. In fact, in the moment, I didn’t feel like I knew anything, but that wasn’t true because I knew what things in the world were. I was filled with almost boundless energy and it was surging. I think that’s why I was running. That may have been why I was screaming.
Then there was an answering scream. It was very different from my scream. There was something threatening, something aggressive in that sound. I had no idea where it came from. I was perceiving the world now, but was still having trouble orienting. Then, in front of me, was a huge lumbering beast. It stood on hind legs with fur-covered arms spread wide, long, sharp talons extended from each finger. It towered over me. It had a long snout and its mouth was wide, exposing three rows of jagged teeth. It blocked my path so completely I barely saw the sky. All of its fur, everywhere on its massive body, stood up and flared like needles. Its eyes were red and hungry.
I wasn’t afraid, although I think it later occurred to me I should have been. There was at the time very little in the way of thought in my head. The world just was. I understood that this was danger, but I just reacted. I didn’t question whether or not this was something I could overcome. I also didn’t turn and run away. Instead my wild energy surged even more and without even knowing what I was planning to do, I poured all that energy into snapping off the trunk of a small tree. It splintered off, leaving a small jagged stump. It was solid and it was heavy. Had I been thinking I might have seen that I could have used the jagged end of the trunk as a weapon, but there was no thought. There was only reaction.
I hefted the tree trunk and launched it in a high arc. I bellowed, not because it hurt or even out of a matching aggressiveness, but as a way of directing energy. Muscles tightened and rippled across my body. The heavy trunk flew. The beast was startled and its eyes flicked up away from me. In its attack posture, it wasn’t agile. The trunk hit squarely at the intersection of its snout and forehead. Something made a sickening cracking sound.
The trunk bounced off to the ground. The beast howled in pain and snatched at its snout. Blood spurted everywhere. I realized I was still running at it, keeping on my path, but it was now going down on all fours, turning it aside, away from the pat
h as it did. As I saw it lumber off, shrieking in rage and pain, I sensed the full mass of the beast. Had I made contact, it would have been a very short fight. I ran.
I’m not sure how long I ran and I certainly didn’t have a destination. It was the energy. It couldn’t be held back. It coursed through me like a white, humming fire. It couldn’t be contained or tamped down. It had to be consumed. I ran through the forested mountains. Occasionally I would trip on something, but I wouldn’t entirely crash to the ground. I would catch myself halfway down, pull my feet back under me and bounce back up, already running again. I ran and I ran. And then I collapsed.
I became conscious again, wedged between a rock and a tree. I must have crawled there for protection. Instinct. I hadn’t really slept, but I had lain quietly for hours, letting my energy return and this time become more balanced. I had drifted in and out of dreams, but they had no meaning to me. I remembered a winged woman but she had turned into something black, like she had been burned, her eyes red. She was shrieking. Even now the image was unsettling, although my memory of it was vague and without detail. I also had seen a pretty woman with white hair. Her eyes were comforting and she was gone, but I could still hear her calling. I thought of answering, but after the beast and the burned winged woman, I was afraid. Now, as I stirred, even those memories seemed to fade.
I stood and looked around. I was in a mountain forest somewhere. I still had no idea who I was. I’m not sure why, but that bothered me. I felt like I should have a name, but when I tried nothing came to me. I didn’t know where I was or how I got here, but that didn’t bother me so much. I still felt strong, but I no longer had that crazy energy surging through me. I could think now in ways I couldn’t before. I noticed I was wearing clothes now. I was pretty sure I was naked when I met the beast and was running. Somehow, I think the touch of cloth on my skin while I was in that state would have caused me to tear it away. I was wearing a yellow shirt and tan pants. I didn’t think much about it.
I wasn’t hungry or thirsty. I thought that was odd, but didn’t care. My mouth was dry. I found a thick, moist plant stalk and tore it off and sucked on the moisture. It made my mouth feel better. I stood still for a moment and took in the fresh smell of the trees. I listened for sounds but there was only the wind blowing gently through the branches overhead. The canopy was thick, but fingers of sunlight touched the ground here and there and I could see blue between the leaves above. For a moment I just absorbed the beauty and the stillness of where I was. I felt both at peace and alone. The alone part bothered me. I kept thinking there were others, but they were just out of reach of any shimmer of memory. However, I knew being alone was a dangerous illusion. There were dangerous creatures here, like the beast I had met. They had claws. I had strength, but only unprotected skin. I ran my tongue over teeth too flat too be useful in a fight. My nails on my hands were short and likely to be useless.
I looked around. I found some heavy rocks that were comfortable to heft, but it would be too hard to carry them around with me. I wandered for quite a ways examining and rejecting rocks and chunks of wood. Most of the wood was lying on the ground because it was half rotting and had broken off. They would just shatter ineffectively in a fight.
After about an hour I came to a tree that had only recently toppled. Some of the trunk was burned, maybe the result of a lightning strike. I tested its branches. It was a very hard, unyielding wood. I tried to tear away one long branch, but the very strength of the wood that made it attractive for a weapon meant I couldn’t use brute strength alone to dislodge it. I searched around until I found a rock that had been eroded into a flattened shape on one edge. I felt the edge and it had a sharpness to it. I held it by the rounded end and hacked away at the tree branch. Even with the stone to cut it, it took a little effort. I was helped by the fact that the branch had been partially separated from the trunk by the impact of hitting the ground.
I set out to use the flat edge of the stone to clean the main shaft of the branch. Removing the smaller offshoots was easier. Taking off the leafy top was a bit harder, but finally got it. Then I used the stone more precisely to sharpen the end of the branch into as close to a point as possible. I had to shape it slowly so that I ended up with something like a cone that funneled down to a point. That way, it had strength still. If I had just tried to make it a jagged break, it would have easily broken off.
When I was done I hefted it and held it with both hands. I jabbed a few times, thrusting up. I hauled it back with one arm and let it fly. It sailed in a graceful arc and plunged into the ground easily. I ran up and pulled it out. I liked it. It felt good, had good balance. It was longer than I would have liked for carrying it around easily, but the part of the wood I could split easily would make it far too short. Remembering the large beast I had faced, I knew I needed the advantage of distance.
I searched a few trees and found a ropey vine growing up one. Tearing a length of it down, I cut it with the stone and then tied both ends to the shaft of my spear. It allowed me to sling it over my back for carrying it.
I kept moving, having no idea what I should be doing. I was alone in a world that I didn’t know much about. I had no real purpose other than staying alive. In the distance I heard a roar. It made my pulse quicken as I sniffed the air and stood stock still listening. I didn’t get a sense that what I had heard was in the immediate vicinity.
To my right was a tall tree with more of those ropey vines. I decided I might be better off in the trees. I didn’t necessarily have a good basis for thinking that, but I figured that larger, heavier enemies would be on the ground and from up high, I might see them first.
I grabbed the vine and shimmied up as far as I could go and have the branches easily support my weight without bowing. Even with the thick growth, it gave me a good wide perspective to see what was coming before it saw me. Now what? I thought. I had no idea what to do or where to go. I was primitive. I simply lived. At the same time I had this feeling that prodded me that there was something important I had to do. When I really let myself think about that feeling, I felt something like anger in the pit of my stomach, but I just assumed that was frustration at not being able to… What? Remember? Why did I think there was anything to remember? There must be. I didn’t know why, but I felt like it wasn’t right for everything to be a blank. I must be someone. I must have something I am called. As hard as I tried nothing came. Finally, in frustration, I took off through the canopy.
It turned out to be a fairly efficient way to travel. The branches were thick and it was easy to avoid the thicker leaf clusters. I could actually run along and leap over smaller branches. Occasionally, when there was a gap between trees that was too big, I could find one of those thick vines and swing on them. I noticed there wasn’t much living in the trees. I started to relax and stopped looking for danger up in the trees.
The forest seemed without end, although I could see a lighter area in the distance that might mean the canopy opened up. The sun had dropped below the mountain line and the sky was now getting silvery. Some kind of large cat with horns and sharp tusks passed below me. I stayed very still until long after it passed. It was getting very dark. I didn’t need sleep, but I realized that without a way to make light, it would be very dangerous to keep going. I wouldn’t be able to defend myself very well if I couldn’t see. Or I might stumble and break a leg.
In the far distance I saw now that where there had been an opening up of the canopy, there was a strange glow of light, coming from a source on the ground. It was an orange glow. I had no idea what it was. It occurred to me to see what it was, but I decided it could wait for daylight. While I could still see a little, I crawled up as high as I could go and lay myself in a cluster of branches that supported me like a slightly uncomfortable hammock. I didn’t sleep. However, I lay still and drifted in and out of awareness. During the hours of darkness there were many strange and haunting sounds, but I felt safe in my leafy burrow.
When it was light enough to see
, I pulled myself out of the branches and stretched. I rearranged the spear on my back so it was more comfortable. I had dreamed of the woman with white hair calling me again. I wanted to know who she was. There was wisdom in her eyes. I knew if she were here she would know what I was supposed to do. I also dreamed, briefly, of a darker woman. Not the burned angel. I felt something deep inside me even as the memory of the face faded.
I noticed that it was a little harder to lower myself gracefully to the stronger branches from up where I was than when I had shimmied up the night before. I reached up to grab a thick branch just above my head so I could swing out and drop down. My mind was still a little foggy from lying still all night, but then a thought popped into my head. I hadn’t noticed a thick branch up here before. Then again, it had been getting dark.
My fingers locked on the branch. The texture was all wrong. It was leathery, almost oily feeling. In fact, my fingers were having trouble getting a firm hold. Then it started undulating.
I heard something just above me. My head snapped around and rotated up. A snake whose head was almost as large as my whole body was dropping down toward me. Its jaws opened wide, exposing two long fangs and a contracting pink tunnel it was planning on drawing me into. I realized in that split second that this serpent of enormous size was threaded through and supported by all the surrounding trees.
My senses all became hyper-focused. All thought stopped. Instinct took over. My foot pushed off the branch, allowing my hand to get a temporary grip. I swung my body out into space in an arc over the forest floor. As I rose up in the air; the serpent’s head whizzed by me, barely missing me. With surprising grace and speed, the serpent changed direction, turning its head to come back up and get me. As I rose, I twisted my body around, pulling my spear off my back in the same motion. Just at the apex of my upward arc, as I began falling and the snake started rising, I raised the spear over my head and thrust it down with all my strength.