Defend

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by Lindsay Paige


  “I think you need to come have dinner or something with us.”

  “Like how you secretly got me to have breakfast with y’all?” she asks with a bit of a snap in her tone.

  “You have to get to know her at one point or another, Kayla.” I lean back in my chair, not particularly interested in my food right now, and rest my hands over my stomach.

  “Why? She’ll probably disappear after the cruise.”

  My jaw clenches. When did my daughter become so hard-headed and stubborn? “She won’t be going anywhere, Kayla, and you might as well start acting like the daughter your mother and I raised. I want you on your best behavior, especially on the cruise. I’ve been patient and I’ve held in my anger, but enough is enough. I’m tired of defending my decisions and defending Jamie to you when you haven’t even tried to give her or us a chance. I will not tolerate it any longer. Understand?”

  “But Daddy—”

  “Don’t Daddy me. It won’t work. Not this time. Find a way to get over it, Kayla.”

  She stares down at her lap for the longest time. I resume eating, and so does she, but not another word is spoken until she stands to leave. Kayla walks behind my desk. I stand and give her a hug.

  “I love you,” I tell her.

  “I love you too,” she whispers.

  If I can get her to accept Jamie, then life will be a little brighter. I need Kayla to do her part because I’ve done all I can do.

  “I hope you’re happy.”

  I turn around to face Kayla. “What?” Seeing her unexpectedly raises my defenses and makes me suspicious. There has to be a confrontation coming, especially with what she just said.

  “Because of you, my relationship with my dad is strained. He told me yesterday I had to deal with being uncomfortable with your relationship, and he refused to listen to my side.”

  “You don’t have a side, Kayla!” I argue. “Feeling awkward about it isn’t a reason for us to break up. I’m sorry if you feel like your relationship is strained, but that has absolutely nothing to do with me and everything to do with you. And if you ask Brent, I’m sure he’d say the exact same thing.” She opens her mouth to argue, but I’m pissed that everyone wants to be pissed at me for Brent dating me and my anger gets the best of me.

  “I’ve done everything I can not to interfere with your relationship with Brent, so if it’s strained, that’s between you and him. Don’t ever confront me again and blame me for something I haven’t done. I’ve been as nice as I can possibly be to you and I’m done. You want to see my bad side, keep on and that’s all you’ll see.” I turn on my heels and walk away before she can utter another word.

  What’s crazy is that I find myself pissed at Brent, too. So much so that I decide to skip my next class to drive to the shop. Brent is talking to a customer in his office. I patiently wait outside until they leave. Brent smiles as he walks to the door of his office and sees me.

  “Hey, what are you doing here?” He leans in to kiss me, but I turn my head so the kiss lands on my cheek.

  “I know you’re working and I’m sorry to come here mad.”

  “Mad?” he echoes with surprise.

  “But I have to work tonight and I didn’t think I could wait that long.” I take a quick breath. “So, can I speak to you?”

  “Sure.” He grabs my hand, pulls me into the office, and closes his door. “Why are you mad?”

  “Did you talk to Kayla yesterday?”

  Brent runs a hand through his hair. “What’d she do now?”

  “Why do you have to keep talking to her and trying to make her let it go, Brent? All that does is make her angry with me! You do your best and talk to her, but then she confronts me and I have to deal with her. I’m tired of it. Please, stop talking to her about me or us. It’s not helping!”

  “What did she say?” he asks.

  “I’m not telling you for you to talk to her again!”

  “I won’t,” he tries.

  “Oh, really? This is your daughter we’re talking about, Brent. You aren’t seriously about to tell me that you won’t try to smooth things over with her again?”

  He hesitates and that’s enough of an answer for me. He would definitely talk to her about what happened today if I give him more details. I won’t do it.

  “Just keep me out of conversations with Kayla because I can’t promise I’ll continue to play nice with her anymore.” I’ve officially reached my limit with all of this bullshit.

  Brent sighs. “I’m sorry, Jamie.” He closes the distance between us to wrap his arms around me. “I’m by no means making excuses for her, but once she’s stuck on an issue, it can take her a while to get over it. Pretty sure it took her finding out about her mom dating Glenn for her to give up on the idea of us getting back together. And she didn’t like one of Logan’s friends, a girl, for some time when they first met. It’s one of her flaws to get hung up on something and take some time to move on from it.”

  “I understand her hesitation, but she’s had time to get used to the idea of us. And I don’t understand why she has to come after me instead of you.”

  “Because she’s daddy’s little girl and it’s probably easier to confront you than me.” He kisses the top of my head. “I’m sorry, hon.”

  “I know.” He’s already said so. A laugh suddenly bursts free and I look up at Brent. “She’d probably have a panic attack if she overheard you joking about marrying me on the cruise. We’d have to have a dinner like Glenn, except I would say that I definitely wouldn’t be their stepmom, just their dad’s wife.”

  Brent grins. “You’ve been thinking about this a lot, huh?”

  “No. Don’t get any ideas. It hit me just now is all.”

  He quickly kisses the corner of my mouth. “Glad you’re smiling again. You have my word to do as you asked.”

  “Thank you. I know you’re only trying to help, but it’s not helping.”

  “Apparently not, when you storm into my work wanting to yell at me.” He gives me a quick smile before kissing me with all the care and love in the world. “I need to work and you need to get back to campus, but you should come home tonight so we can make up properly.”

  “I can do that, and it’ll be like a farewell night too.”

  Brent tenses and narrows his eyes at me. “What are you talking about, Jamie?”

  “Finals will be here soon, Brent. I need to pass them so I can graduate this semester. I don’t need my hot and sweet boyfriend distracting me when I need to spend all my time outside of class and work studying.”

  “For the next two and a half weeks?” he asks skeptically and with a touch of disappointment. Before I can answer, he says, “Wouldn’t my house be a more ideal place to study than a noisy dorm on campus? I can leave you alone.” I raise an eyebrow, not sure if I believe him. “I wouldn’t fuck with your school. Two and a half weeks is a hell of a long time and I’m protesting.”

  I smile simply because he’s switched over to his don’t-argue-with-me tone. “I’ll think about it.”

  “Don’t think. Just bring your butt over to my house tonight and every night after that.”

  “I’ll think about it,” I repeat, lifting up to kiss him on the cheek. “I’ll see you tonight. I love you.” The thrill I get from saying those words and seeing Brent’s face light up, to see him smile as if I gave him whatever it is he’s been asking the world to give him, is absolutely crazy, but I love it.

  “I love you, hon.”

  A knock on his door ends the magical moment that seems to come every time we say those words to one another. The timing is good, though, because I do have to leave and Brent should get back to work. Regardless of whether I do my studying at his house or on campus, the time between here and finals are going to be the longest of my life.

  I spent my time at Brent’s studying. He’s very persuasive when he wants to be. The problem is I didn’t take any time to look for an apartment. Brent, always one with a solution, told me to bring my stuff to h
is house for the time being. I’m sure that will go over well with Kayla when she finds out, even though I’m not moving in.

  “Will you quit pacing? I’m sure you did great,” Brent says.

  “We’re sure you did too,” Ronnie agrees from the next bay over.

  I’m hanging out at the shop while I wait for final grades to be posted; that’s the only for sure way I know if I’ll graduate this Saturday. “Thanks,” I say more to Ronnie and Peter than to Brent, but only because their support is more unexpected.

  “Are you walking?” Brent asks, referring to the graduation ceremony.

  “My parents would kill me if I didn’t. I don’t care either way. And you know, I’m feeling a little sick.” I try refreshing my browser on my phone again, but I’m still missing grades from all but one class.

  Brent laughs. “That’s because you’re nervous about your grades. Give me your phone and go in my office. Lay down and take a nap.”

  “A nap?” I exclaim. He can’t be serious.

  “Yes, a nap. You’ve worked yourself to death the past couple of weeks. Go rest. I’ll let you know when they’ve been posted.”

  I am thoroughly exhausted, but I’m also so anxious, I don’t know if I could sleep. Brent holds his hand out expectantly. With a sigh, I hand over my phone and disappear into his office. I hope I pass all my classes. The thought of having to stay one more semester makes me sick to my stomach. But as I rest my head on the pillow, my eyes droop closed and my worries disappear.

  Kisses on my neck and cheek and forehead rouse me awake. “Honey, time to wake up and go celebrate.”

  “Time to go home?” I mumble, not ready to wake up yet. “What time is it?”

  “Almost six. We’re the only ones here. For someone who wasn’t tired, you sure did sleep a long time. Come on. I’m buying you supper.”

  I sit up and run my fingers through my hair. “We’re going out to eat?”

  “Didn’t you hear me? We have to celebrate.”

  My eyes widen as it hits me. “I passed?”

  “Every single one.”

  I throw my arms around him. “I can’t believe it! I’m done! It’s over!” My mouth finds his and I kiss him as if he gave me the good grades himself. This is surreal. I can’t believe I’m finished with college. All the suffering and schoolwork is over and now I can forever relax. “Where are we going?”

  “Wherever you want as long as I get to shower first.”

  “Then let’s go.”

  I’m glad we stop at home because that gives me a chance to change and freshen up. While I’m waiting on Brent, I also text my parents the good news. Brent walks out of his bathroom with only a towel wrapped around his waist.

  “Hey, come here.”

  “If I walk over there, you’ll seduce me. I know that look on your face.”

  “What’s wrong with being seduced? We’re supposed to be celebrating, aren’t we?” I ask innocently.

  “By going to eat first. I’m starved.”

  “Well, order something and then get over here,” I demand.

  He frowns as he walks over to me. “You really don’t want to go out? What kind of celebration would it be if we didn’t go to some nice restaurant?”

  “The kind where we enjoy ourselves first and foremost. Let’s order something and eat in. Please?” My fingers tease with the top of his towel. “It is my celebration, after all,” I remind him. “You pick what to eat and I get you.”

  “All right.”

  We spend a few minutes placing a takeout order with an Italian restaurant. Okay, so we don’t do it. Brent places the order while I strip down, enjoying the way his eyes watch my every move. He hangs up just as I remove his towel.

  “It’ll be ready in twenty minutes. I’ll need to leave before then.”

  “Yes, boss. I’ll only use nineteen minutes of your time, I promise.”

  Brent laughs. He shakes his head with a smile before dipping his head to kiss me. Our hands roam over one another, mine soft and eager and Brent’s callused and teasing. Being with Brent never ceases to amaze me. The longer we’re together, the better it feels, the higher the rush, the more connected I feel to him.

  He whispers sweet nothings to me. Some are simply sweet, some are deliciously dirty, and some are three short words that ultimately mean the most. Ever since he told me how he felt, I’ve realized that even if he didn’t say those words, I’m certain I would know. He shows me so often. From how he touches me, to how he treats me, to the things he says to me, he shows his love in various ways.

  “Satisfied?” he asks, kissing me on the cheek before sliding out of the bed to get dressed.

  “More than you know,” I reply with a happy sigh. “Throw me my clothes.”

  “You can stay.”

  “But I want to ride with you.”

  He picks up my clothes and tosses them onto the bed as he says, “You mean you don’t want to stay here, naked in my bed, and wait for me to come back?”

  That sounds nice too. “What do you want?”

  Brent grins. “I want you naked in my bed, waiting for me.”

  I fall back to let my head hit the pillow. “Then go and I’ll be here when you get back. Just drive my car since I parked behind you.”

  He kisses me one more time and then he’s gone. I lie in bed for all of two minutes before getting up for the bathroom and to see if Brent has any sweet tea. Before I leave his room, I do find a T-shirt of Brent’s and slip it on. He doesn’t have any tea made, but I do find everything I need to make it, so I do that.

  Just as I turn off the burner, I hear the front door open. “Back already?”

  “Why are you here?” Swiveling around, I find Kayla walking into the kitchen. “God, can’t you be dressed? Where’s my dad?”

  “He left to pick up dinner. What happened to knocking before you walked into his house?”

  She folds her arms over her chest. “I didn’t think you were here. Your car wasn’t here and school is over for the semester. I was hoping you went back to wherever you came from.”

  “Sorry to burst your bubble. Is there a reason you’re here?”

  Instead of answering me, she walks out of the room and I can hear her feet practically stomping upstairs. A minute or so later when I’m pouring myself a glass of my now-finished tea, she returns to the kitchen with bag full of clothes.

  “Are you moving in?” she asks.

  If she can ignore my questions, I can ignore hers as well. Childish, most likely, but being civil hasn’t gotten me anywhere.

  Kayla narrows her eyes at me. “Are you going to put some clothes on?”

  “You’re lucky I’m dressed at all. I’m supposed to be naked when Brent gets back.”

  I swear, she almost gags and that only makes me smile behind my glass. The front door opens again. Brent finds us in the kitchen with our standoff going on. He kisses Kayla’s temple with a hello before walking over to me for a kiss on the mouth.

  “I didn’t know you were coming over,” he says to her as he sets our food on the counter.

  “I couldn’t find one of my dresses. It wasn’t at Mom’s and it turns out it was here.”

  “If you keep having to go to your mom’s to find clothes, Logan might think you aren’t fully moved in and committed to living with him,” Brent says.

  “Well, I have more clothes than I thought and I somehow keep finding that I don’t have them all. Is she moving in?”

  Brent glances at me as if I might know why she’s asking this question. I shrug, and he focuses on Kayla. “Why?”

  “She has stuff in my room!”

  “You’re an adult who lives with her boyfriend; that’s not really your room anymore, though it’s always there for you to use if you need it. But no, she’s not moving in. However, if I decide to ask her and she agrees to move in, I expect not to hear shit about it from my kids.” He returns his gaze to me. “Have you two been getting along while I was gone?”

  “Perfectly,” I a
nswer.

  “Good,” his focus is on Kayla again, “because I’m tired of a certain little girl forgetting who’s the parent and who’s the child, who shouldn’t question my decisions.” He takes a deep breath. “Did you pass all your classes?”

  “Yes, of course,” she answers as if it should be obvious. Maybe it should be. “Well, I’m going to go.” She walks over to hug him, tell him she loves him, and she says goodbye to him. She doesn’t say another word to me, which is fine.

  The moment she’s out the front door, Brent turns to me. “Perfectly, huh?”

  “You don’t believe me?” I drag a plate of food over and grab one of the plastic forks.

  “Nope. Not even a little, hon.”

  “Well, you should. I’m still in a good mood, aren’t I?”

  He seems to consider this as we eat. “I guess I’ll take one out of two for the time being.”

  If I can fight fire with fire like I did tonight, I think I’ll enjoy myself just fine on the cruise. At this point, Brent’s and my enjoyment is the only thing I care about anyway.

  Finally, we’re on a plane to Seattle. I’m more excited about being back with Jamie than how we’re about to go on a cruise. After she graduated, she went back to Charlotte to carry some of her things to her parents’ house because she felt bad about them taking up space in my house, even though I told her it didn’t bother me. She also had to pack for the cruise. Based on some of the phone calls we had, things were better with her parents, so she didn’t want to be in too much of a rush to leave.

  Jamie has the window seat, I have the middle, and Gregory has the aisle seat. Kayla and Logan are in the row behind us. Gregory has his headphones on, listening to music with his eyes closed. Jamie has nodded off with her head on my shoulder, and the two behind me are whispering, but I can still hear them.

  “Do you think you’ll finally get along with her?” Logan asks quietly.

  “I don’t know. There’s something about her I just don’t like. Dad told me I have to behave.” Things are quiet for a moment and then I hear Kayla ask, “Do you think I’m judgmental?”

 

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