“And whoever I do it with is my mate?” This seemed like the most unfair part of the whole deal, that I’d be driven by biological urges to have sex and tied for life to whoever I had it with. Maybe I could avoid that by getting relief from nonintercourse sexual contact.
“You may accept more than one partner,” Zach said, his voice carefully neutral. “But after the first full moon, you’d be expected to name your choice.”
Talk about a lot to come to terms with, and very little time to do it in. I drew a shaky breath in and let it out slowly. “And whoever I choose is the new wolf king.”
“I’ll abide by your choice, whatever it is.” Zach seemed to miss my meaning, but he brought up something I hadn’t considered. That I might choose somebody else, and he’d oppose it.
So, I had Zach’s word that he wouldn’t force me into any particular choice and wouldn’t fight it if I chose somebody other than him. That still left me with ten men who would be king competing for my body. Given what I could see of the palace, there was considerable incentive. I didn’t kid myself that my heart would rank in equal importance. And my body was turning against me.
I turned to David. “Are you still up for a run?”
David looked to Zach before he answered me. “Sure. I’ll take you.”
CHAPTER SIX
ONCE OUTSIDE, I FELT A LITTLE LESS TRAPPED. BUT I DIDN’T REALLY think I had the energy to run. Dread of the unknown future sapped my strength. “Can we just walk?” I asked David, waving toward the hedge maze. “Maybe in there. As long as we don’t get lost.”
“Sure.”
“A wolf of few words.” I headed toward the entrance and he kept pace with me, shortening his stride to match it to mine.
“Didn’t think you wanted to come out here for small talk.”
We entered the maze, and I stopped to inhale the fragrance of living things. Even in winter, the garden held the promise of green springtime. David paused beside me, waiting and watchful.
“No,” I agreed. “I wanted to come out here because I wanted to think and I’d like a military perspective. Unless I’m very wrong, you have one.”
He nodded, confirming my guess. I wasn’t surprised. It was in his bearing, his manner. He had a disciplined watchfulness that said “noncivilian.”
“Army? Navy? Air Force?”
“Marines.”
“Figures. Marines, first to fight.” I forged ahead with my feet and my words. “I’m missing pieces of the big picture. For instance, those panthers I met at the mall. Am I right in guessing that they are actual panthers? Cat people?”
“Yes.”
With that one word my world expanded even further past the borders of the mental map I’d always known. I’d voyaged well off the charts and into dragon territory. Not just werewolves but other shape-shifters existed.
“Are they a problem?”
“They’ve been increasingly aggressive,” David said. “More incidents of individual and small-group conflicts. Maneuvering against our territory. I think they’re positioned to challenge us in an organized attack if they perceive a weakness.”
“As in, a change of leadership.” I kicked at the ground, hating the feeling of being pushed into a corner. Not that I had anything against Zach. Just the opposite, the more I saw of him the more he impressed me. His pack trusted him and respected him. That alone spoke volumes. Then there was the state of the estate we were on. If Zach was in charge of the money, appearances said he was very smart about managing it.
David gave a noncommittal grunt but didn’t disagree.
“Do you think Zach is the best leader?” I asked for his opinion not sure he’d give it.
“Yes.”
“Why?”
“He thinks first, acts second. Looks at the big picture. Acts for the good of the pack.” We walked on in silence before David added, “That’s not an endorsement of him as a mate. I’m not qualified to judge.”
“Didn’t ask you to.” We wound through the maze, and David took a subtle lead, directing us along the right route. We took a final turn and then we were in the center, a circle inside the hedges with a bench under a rose arbor facing a small fountain. The fountain had two levels, an upper level filled by a figure of a maiden pouring water from a pitcher, and the lower filled from a wolf’s head with an open mouth. How appropriate.
Between the height of the hedges and the arbor, this spot would provide an oasis of shade in the summer, when the humidity pressed down and turned the air into hot molasses. “Pretty,” I said out loud.
I contemplated the peaceful scene while I digested David’s statements. If I chose Zach, the general order of things in the pack would be sustained. That was probably best for all concerned, no matter how I might feel about it personally. And how I felt about it wasn’t really possible to gauge just now. Too many shocks, too many revelations, too much to process.
“Will I be expected to live here?” I crossed over and took a seat on the bench, drew my feet up on the stone platform, and rested my chin on my knees.
“Do you have to be told it’s the safest option?” David sat beside me, his gaze level and his face serious.
“No. I get that.” Not that I expected waking up to coffee in the solarium to be a hardship. And given my intense reaction to perfumes and colognes and chemical smells, life on an estate with extensive private grounds inhabited by people who wouldn’t assault my airways was a real bonus.
Luxury aside, safety came first. If I was the lone female werewolf in the area, I wasn’t just a target to prospective mates. I was also a target for pack enemies, and that included the rogue wolves who’d split off. Even if I knew how to handle the transition of shifting from human to wolf form and mastered the instincts and abilities that went along with that, even if I could trust myself not to hurt somebody, it would be dumb to rob myself of twelve devoted bodyguards.
My life as I’d known it was well and truly over. My plans for the future, well, at least I’d achieved one goal. I knew who my real parents were.
I absorbed that while my stomach sank and my head went light. “You know, I had that whole secret-princess fantasy as a kid,” I told David. “That someday my real family would show up and I’d be some sort of princess. My fantasy did not include growing fangs and fur under the full moon.”
I hadn’t dreamed of a prince who howled, either. Orgies had also not made the list. My imagination seemed woefully inadequate.
He didn’t answer. Probably he guessed, correctly, that there was no good response. After a while, my butt started to notice how cold and hard stone could feel. I got stiffly to my feet. I waited for my babysitter to take the lead, and I followed him out of the maze in silence.
When we returned to open ground, I took a good look at the house. It was a sprawling brick structure, more than adequate housing for twelve. It could probably hold twice that number without anybody feeling crowded. I made a silent bet with myself that whatever bedroom I was assigned to could hold my apartment two times over.
The lines of the building were graceful, classic. Whoever had designed the place had an eye for beauty and the skill to execute his or her vision. It had a sense of stability, and I guessed it was over a hundred years old.
This house had stood the test of time. The pack had endured since very early history, if my Internet search results could be believed. Slavic mythology went back to Neolithic times, possibly earlier. Which made sense, if humans and shape-shifters had evolved together.
I’d wanted to discover my roots, I reminded myself. Too late now to whine that ignorance was bliss. Besides, in my case ignorance was dangerous.
“David.” He stopped when I spoke, and turned back toward me. “Do you want to be the pack leader?”
“Not particularly.” His voice and face were neutral, giving nothing away, but I thought I detected tension in his body.
“Then why did you kiss me?”
His gray eyes took on heat. “I didn’t say I don’t want you.”<
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Oh. I tried not to trip over my own feet while I absorbed that one, and told myself not to make too much of it. Of course he wanted me. He was a male werewolf and I was a female approaching heat. Naturally he’d be willing to take advantage of proximity, and the upcoming sexual competition allowed a certain freedom to indulge.
Still, it was nice to hear that he just wanted me, no strings.
We went back inside without another word exchanged. My head buzzed with facts and speculation. Overload. I found myself longing for a bath and a nap. My stomach growled and I added a meal to the list, preferably one loaded with nutrients and something, anything, that would stabilize my metabolism.
The red-haired werewolf, Jack, met us in the solarium and fell in behind me as David led the way into the house. Jack was a little taller than me, but not so much that he loomed. His lean muscled frame made him seem less physically imposing than his broad-shouldered brother. “Where’s Zach?” I asked Jack.
“He has a meeting. Videoconference. The rest of the team is on a tight project delivery schedule, so you get me for company.” Jack grinned at me, obviously pleased with the arrangement, and I found myself relaxing in the face of his good humor.
“Project?”
“Yep.” Between them, they walked me through hallways and into a large, sunny kitchen. “This is the main campus of Neuri Enterprises, a web programming, design, and implementation collaborative.”
Werewolves with day jobs. I wanted to laugh, but really, they had to earn a living like everybody else. The taxes and upkeep on this place probably didn’t come cheap, either. “I guess you guys aren’t cut out for office life, what with your night hours and the inability to work around the full moon.”
“Corporate America is a bit too rigid to suit our lifestyle,” Jack said with a wink. “Most of our clients are at a distance, in New York, California, or at international locations. With phone-and videoconferencing, there’s not much need for travel or face-to-face meetings.”
Huh. The kind of business that could use a technical writer. “Maybe I should give Zach a copy of my résumé.”
“He has it. You’re hired.” Jack didn’t miss a beat as he pulled out a chair for me.
I blinked. “Do I get medical and dental?”
“With your natural ability to heal and resistance to disease, you won’t need them. We’re all disgustingly healthy.”
Jack put a plate of something unidentifiable in front of me, and David poured a glass that probably contained more wolfsbane. He gave me a look I took as silent warning not to screw around with my changing body’s needs. Like I needed to be told. I picked up the glass and waved it at him in a mock salute before I drank. I was starting to get used to the stuff. It wasn’t so bad once I got past the horrible taste and the acid way it burned my throat.
“You won’t be expected to start immediately,” Jack went on. “After your first change, you’ll need about three days to adjust.” He waited until I’d put my glass down before he named my salary, adding, “Room, board, and company car included.”
Good thing he waited. I might’ve dropped my drink again, and he’d already cleaned up after me once.
“I have a car,” I said, because I didn’t know what else to say. I’d just been offered twice my best hope for starting salary, with the added bonus of flexibility for my special needs. Plus housing. Of course, the catch was that I shared the job and house with eleven men who could tear my throat out, but everything had its downside.
“Yes, but we would all feel better if you drove a Volvo,” Jack returned deadpan.
The safest car on the market. Message received, I thought. I started eating my glop. It was as tasteless as it looked. “Do I want to know what I’m eating?”
“No,” David and Jack answered together.
Great. I tried not to think about the possibilities as I swallowed. I was tired of feeling like crap and still frightened by my blackout, so I did what the experienced wolves thought was good for me. The stuff was easy to get down, at least.
Jack and David had a quiet conversation about some deliverable schedule while I ate, and it was nice to hear something so normal. So human.
Something none of us would be tomorrow night. We’d be driven by animal needs, animal instincts, and revealed for what we were in animal form.
I put my fork down and stared at my plate. “Will it hurt?” My quiet question came during a lull in the business talk. David was the one who answered, and he didn’t have to ask what I meant.
“Some. It’s uncomfortable when your body shifts from one form to another. Like growing pains.”
I nodded, then pushed my chair back. “Do I have a room?” I wanted quiet, space, and maybe a pillow to vent my emotions on.
“You do.” The two of them shepherded me up two flights of stairs to the top floor and around a hall to my doorway. I turned the knob and walked in, wondering what my chamber in Wolf Manor would hold.
The door opened into a big sitting room, with a bedroom off to one side and a smaller room that held a desk on the other. My first impression was one of space and light. I was right about the size. My postage stamp apartment would be lost in here.
Hardwood floors throughout gleamed as if newly polished and gauzy drapes softened the windows. The sitting room had a brown leather couch and matching high-backed chair, convenient end tables, and a colorful Persian rug I knew my toes would sink deep into.
It was a comfortable room, not girly or frilly, just beautiful and elegant. A vase with a subtle arrangement of greenery and blossoms on one table lent a light fragrance to the air. I wondered who had put fresh flowers in here when I’d just arrived and if they’d come from the solarium.
I wandered into the bedroom and discovered it had a cedar walk-in closet with skylight, a tiled bathroom with a jetted tub to soak in, and French doors that opened onto a small balcony that looked out over the garden and hedge maze below. Two chairs with a bistro table nestled between them, and a potted tree made the balcony a temptation even in cold weather.
The bedroom also held a wrought-iron king-sized bed that loomed overly large in my imagination even though it suited the room’s proportions. Matching tables with little brass lamps went on either side, and deep white rugs that looked like sheepskin lay on the floor. No matter which side of the bed I got up on, my feet wouldn’t get cold.
A thick satin comforter in a shade somewhere between purple and midnight blue covered the bed. It would feel cool and smooth against bare skin. I tried not to think about who or what else would be touching me on that bed.
“Is it okay?”
I turned around and caught Jack’s worried look. I’d stared at the bed a beat too long, and I’d already bolted once. Try not to make the nice werewolf nervous. “Fine. Everything is fine.”
With the room, at least. It was beautiful and the furniture alone probably cost more than my last year’s tuition. My life was in shambles, but my private suite was gorgeous. I tried to smile at Jack. It didn’t quite form.
“I’ll get her settled,” David said. Jack took the hint and left, closing the door behind him.
David closed the distance between us and slid an arm around my waist, guiding me toward the couch. We sat and I didn’t resist when he drew me onto his lap crosswise, my legs resting on the cushions, his arms bracing me, his shoulder providing a convenient resting place for my head.
“Zach won’t be long,” he said, his voice a soothing rumble in my ear. “I’ll stay with you until he’s free, if you want.”
I nodded in silence. I did want. I’d thought I wanted privacy and solitude to come to grips with things, but now I realized I wanted exactly what he’d given me. I wanted to be held.
“I’m scared,” I said in a voice just above a whisper.
“Of us?”
I gave a slight shake of negation. “Not exactly. Of me. Of what I might do. Of what I am.”
He didn’t tell me I was dumb to be scared. Instead, he gave me a slight sque
eze. “You’ll get through it.”
I liked his confidence, even if I didn’t share it. I tried to absorb it into my pores along with the warmth of his body. He was still bare from the waist up but didn’t seem cold. “Do you run a higher temperature than normal?” I asked, curious. “And are you leaving your shirt off because it’s more comfortable, or because you want me to admire your manly chest?”
“Yes, yes, and if you do, it’s a fringe benefit.” He answered my questions in order, then lifted my hand and placed my palm against the wall of his chest. I liked the feel of his skin and couldn’t help contrasting it with the touch of fur.
“This is weird,” I said, but I didn’t let that stop me from running my hand down to his belly, exploring the muscle and sinew. David was a mouthwatering specimen of male flesh, to all appearances no different from any other man. The differences were under the skin, I thought, and shivered.
“That I’m not wearing a shirt?”
I smiled and shook my head. “No. Weird is sitting in a werewolf’s lap. Weird is knowing I petted you on the head in one form and had your tongue in my mouth in another. If I hadn’t seen you change, I wouldn’t believe it.”
I let my hand glide back up to explore the slope of his shoulder and the heavy muscle of his upper arm. He didn’t stop me, so I took silence as permission. Touching him made me feel safer in some odd way. As if I was taking control. Would I have any tomorrow night? Or would I be reduced to blind need?
“I wish it didn’t have to be like this,” I whispered. My throat felt tight and I swallowed convulsively against the pressure. “If I touch you tomorrow, I won’t know if it’s what I want or if it’s just what the wolf inside me wants.”
“You are the wolf.” The assurance in his voice made me raise my head and search out his eyes with mine. “You want what you need.”
“You make it sound so simple.”
“It is.” David’s head bent toward mine in a slow descent, allowing me plenty of time to decide if I wanted to accept the kiss or reject it. I moved into it, meeting him halfway.
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