‘I’m off then. Will you be here when I get back?’ she asked, trying to make the question sound casual.
He looked at her for a long moment with those dark eyes before countering, ‘Do you want me to be here?’
Kate swallowed hard and replied, ‘I’ve learned a lot these last few days, most of it about myself. Not much of it good. And what I’ve learned most of all is that I’m a damaged person. I thought I had my past in control, that I could handle it, but that was just arrogance, and denial. Now I know that my childhood has ruined my life as surely as Grainne’s childhood damaged her. Instead of fleeing from my abusive past the way she did I built a wall around my heart, around my emotions. It protected me but it made me hard too, and selfish. All my life I’ve only been able to empathise with my patients, with other damaged souls. I’ve saved the best of me, all the love and tenderness and giving I’m capable of, for them. And I’ve largely just used the other people in my life, taking without giving much back. I’m going to start therapy myself, to try to change, to free myself of my past. To free myself of what my father did to me. I want to be a warmer, more rounded person but it won’t be easy. And there’s no guarantee of success. So I can’t ask you to stick around on the off-chance that I might succeed.’ She managed a wan smile and lowered her gaze to the floor, ‘The old Kate might but if I want to change I can’t.’
Peter took a step closer and softly repeated, ‘Do you want me to be here?’
Kate looked up at him, vulnerability and naked need in her swimming eyes. And she replied softly, painfully, ‘Yes, I want you here. Always.’
He enveloped her in the vast embrace that always threatened to crush her but somehow never did, and gently kissed her cheek before whispering simply, ‘I’ll be here then. Always.’
The End
Table of Contents
Copyright
Dedication
Chapter One
Chapter Two
Chapter Three
Chapter Four
Chapter Five
Chapter Six
Chapter Seven
Chapter Eight
Chapter Nine
Chapter Ten
Chapter Eleven
Chapter Twelve
Chapter Thirteen
Chapter Fourteen
Chapter Fifteen
Chapter Six teen
Chapter Seven teen
Chapter Eighteen
Chapter Nine teen
Chapter Twenty
Chapter Twenty-One
Chapter Twenty-Two
Chapter Twenty-Three
Chapter Twenty-Four
Chapter Twenty-Five
Chapter Twenty-Six
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Epilogue
Hidden Page 36