by Ava May
When I pulled back my lips were swollen and I licked them. His eyes were dark, and he was flushed.
“Darlin’, you have no idea how long I’ve longed to do that.” His fingers gripped my sides as if he was afraid I’d disappear. But I wasn’t going anywhere. I had a feeling Evan was it; he wasn’t going to let me go.
I’d never been so thoroughly kissed. It wasn’t just a kiss either, there was so much more behind the motion. He conveyed his feelings in the best of ways.
Without a word he stripped the dress off, sliding it slowly down my stomach and over my wide hips. When his fingers grazed my panties, he let go of the fabric and it fell to the floor, pooling around my feet. I stepped out of the dress, and then I was standing there in just a bra and panties. Evan’s eyes scanned my bare skin, and I heard his groan before he slid a finger down my chest all the way to the dampness between my legs. They wobbled and I gripped his arm for balance. I’d never felt so aroused in my life. No one had ever desired me like this before. It was addictive.
Instead of letting him undress me anymore I reached for her shirt and peeled it off. He helped pulling it over his head and tossed it on top on my dress. I gripped the button to his shorts and quickly unsnapped them and pulled the zipper. When I went to slide them off he pushed him down his muscular thighs and then he stood naked. Apparently, Evan didn’t wear boxers. He was hard and ready.
Chapter 4
Seeing Evan stand in front of me completely naked was something I never thought would happen, but there he was, and even as my body throbbed with need, I worried. He was older, way more experienced, and I was insecure. Wes had complained about how I was in bed, and I was worried I wouldn’t measure up.
“Look at me, darlin’.”
I blushed and tilted my head to the side and kept my eyes locked on him.
“You’re shakin’. We don’t have to do anything other than what we’ve done. But let’s get you in the tub to warm up.”
I nodded, because at that moment I was too nervous. I reached behind my back and unclasped my bra. He watched as it fell to the ground and my breasts were free. They were large and the nipples were a dusky pink. They hardened under his stare, and I gasped when he ran the tip of his finger around them.
“They’re beautiful. Everything about you is beautiful, Zoe.”
“Thank you.”
I couldn’t stand it. I hated the way I felt. A part of me felt ready to climb him like a tree and fuck him until I couldn’t move, but the other docile and shy side wanted to wait. I was afraid of rushing in and getting my heart broken again. I wasn’t a one-night stand kind of woman. I might have been young, but I knew what I didn’t want. I was the type of woman who wanted it all.
Sliding my panties down my shapely thighs I couldn’t ignore the burn of his stare. He looked at me like I was the best thing in the world. His eyes devoured my body and his cock jumped when I stood bare before him.
“Perfect. You are all woman, Zoe Moore.” The reverence in his tone startled me.
Evan held out his hand and I took it. He led me up the two small stone steps, and I climbed into the hot water. As soon as I sunk into the water all the fear went away. I leaned my head back and sighed as my body relaxed for the first time. The scent of lavender filled my senses, and I became weightless.
Evan climbed in next to me and sat back. He let out a breath when he leaned back. I cracked my eye open and looked at him. His relaxation seemed to resemble mine. It was as a weight had been lifted off his shoulders.
I laid my head on his shoulder and I felt his lips on my hair. “This is nice,” he said, and I nodded.
“Haven’t you used the services you provide?”
“Nah, never thought I would, but I’m glad I brought you.” He tipped my head back and kissed me softly. “I love you, Zoe. I know you just broke up with your boyfriend, and I know I’m much older, but I was hoping you would consider me. I’d treat you the way you deserve.”
I brought one hand to his cheek and smiled. “I know you would, and I don’t care about how old you are. To me you’re not even old. What about my dad though?”
He chuckled. “Your dad probably knows, darlin’. I haven’t done anything to hide how I feel for you. Over the last couple of years he has noticed how I stare a little too much, or that I ask about you frequently. I’m not ashamed. You’re an adult.”
“I didn’t know that. Dad never really said anything to me. He isn’t around much, and he certainly doesn’t like to chat on the phone. Sometimes I think he loves those damn dogs more than me.”
“I don’t think he knows how to deal with you. But let’s not talk about him now. I want you to think about it though. Be with me.”
“I will.” I knew I wanted him, but it sounded too good to be true. I know he’d treat me like a princess. I wouldn’t have to worry about him hurting me. There was something so honest about Evan. He had a heart of gold. I was more worried that I’d end up hurting him, and I wouldn’t even do it on purpose. As much as I didn’t care how old he was, there was still a good difference in our ages.
I felt his hand on my breast and sucked in a breath. He moved his hands experimentally on my body, as if testing to see how far I’d allow him to go. When he slid his hand down further, I spread my legs. He ran his finger over my clit and I shuddered. In the water he couldn’t tell how wet I was, but then he pushed my legs even further apart and rubbed circles along my flesh. I bit my lip and let my head fall back. Then he kissed my neck and turned my head towards him. I kept my eyes shut and when he kissed me I cried out into his mouth. His finger slid inside of my tightness and I clenched around him. I convulsed and shook as he thrust his finger gently in and out, working me up towards my release. He didn’t stop even when I ripped my mouth from his and let out a gusty groan. My hips jerked and rose to meet each thrust wishing it was him inside of me. When my climax hit, I would have screamed, but Evan covered my mouth with his lips, eating the sounds, and held me close as I withered.
“It’s all right, Zoe. Let it out.” He pulled his finger out and then something inside of me snapped.
I climbed on his lap and ground against his erection. I grabbed his face and kissed him as I rocked against him, begging him to enter me. He covered my hands with his own and pulled them back. When I pulled away from him his eyes shined with a lust so deep. “I don’t want you to regret anything, darlin’.”
I shook my head. “I wouldn’t ever regret being with you, Evan.”
“If you’re sure.”
“I am. Please.” Then to make sure he knew I was serious I swiveled my hips and he could feel how much I wanted him, even in the water.
I lifted on my knees, and then I slid slowly down his shaft. He was wide and big and my eyes widened as I took him all the way. When I felt him hit the back I gulped. He stretched me to the point of pain, and as he held still, waiting for me to take the lead, I adjusted my tightness to him. Once I could move and not grimace, I rode him slowly. I rocked against him and he thrust up deeply into me. The sounds coming from my lips were unrecognizable. Evan’s arms wrapped around me, pulling me close.
I felt the build-up of pressure and sped up, going nearly all the way off of him before slamming back down. He grunted and I moaned. I’d never been given control before and I found I liked it. It wasn’t much longer until I came, bringing him with me. I felt his body stiffen and his grip tightened. I kissed him and slowed my pace. He thrust hard and drove into me. Water sloshed over the side of the tub and I giggled. His brows creased together in concertation and then I bit his neck and he nearly growled.
When he slowed his movements to a stopped his breathing was ragged. “Dammit, darlin’.”
That’s all I needed to hear. I felt it too.
Chapter 5
Evan got out of the tub first and grabbed towels to clean up the water, and when I got out he held my hand to make sure I didn’t fall. My legs felt like jelly and I wobbled, but I wore a smile. I’d always known Evan was spe
cial. What happened was more than sex, and even though I worried, I had a feeling things would only continue to heat up more.
He patted me dry with a warm towel, and then I got dressed. I blushed, knowing that someone would know what had gone on in that tub.
“Stop, it happens all the time. It’s why there are only so many slots for this particular package. Everything gets cleaned properly.”
I nodded but still blushed. “What’s next?”
“We’ll have a nice lunch and then a massage.”
The day just kept getting better and better. This place was a hidden-away heaven, and I wondered if he did it on purpose. It seemed high-end and exclusive, even as it had a country feel. It was a mix of both worlds.
****
The massage had to have been the best part of the day. Evan took over and we made love on the table. Now I wondered what he had planned. He smiled at me and put my hand on his thigh and covered it with his own as he drove. I was more relaxed than I had been in a long time—if ever. Evan ran his thumb on top of my hand and I glanced at him. “Thank you for today. It’s been amazing.”
“You deserve it, darlin’, and I’m glad you enjoyed yourself. I did too. It’s been a long time since I’ve felt like this.”
“Now home?”
“Yeah, I have to take care of the dogs still, and I want to make sure I’m there when your dad calls. I’m going to come clean with him—”
I gasped. “It’s too soon, don’t you think?”
He tensed. “Do you? I don’t feel right lying to my friend, and I see this going somewhere.”
“I just don’t think you should tell my dad right now. We’ve had a great day and you know he’s going to flip shit and probably come home. I’d like a little more alone time with you before we have to face it is all.”
He sighed. “I guess you’re right, I’m just happy and I don’t want the guilt of keeping it a secret to cloud anything. I want you, Zoe, for as long as you’ll have me.”
“You’re serious? You want this to be something more even though I just basically got dumped?”
“You didn’t get dumped. You left him for cheating. I understand if you’re not ready, and I’ll wait as long as you want.”
I nodded. I knew what I wanted but I was afraid. “I just don’t want to rush, Evan. As much as I don’t want to admit it, Wes hurt me badly.”
“I know, darlin’. We can drop the subject for now, and I won’t talk to your dad then.” He smiled, but I could tell he was hurt. I wasn’t sure how a man’s mind worked, but I was pretty sure Evan wasn’t your typical guy. We’d had sex, twice, and most men would be happy with that, but apparently Evan was not. He wanted it all, and I wasn’t sure if I was ready. I’d only been home for a little over a day.
The rest of the drive was awkward and silent. He seemed to be mulling over my hesitance, and I didn’t know what to say. The relaxation was gone, and now I felt guilty. I hated hurting people’s feelings, but I also wouldn’t give into something if I wasn’t sure about it—never again. I did it before with Wes, and look how that turned out. It wasn’t Evan who I didn’t trust, it was me. I didn’t want to jump in too soon.
When we pulled into the driveway, there was a truck parked in front of the house and I gasped.
“Wes,” I said and my lip quivered. What the hell was he doing here? I unbuckled and sat frozen.
“He’s here to get you back, I’m sure. No man will drive across that far to have a chat.”
I looked at Evan and gave him sad smile. “I don’t think I’m ready to face him. There is so much—so much built up.”
“Darlin’, you should talk to him. If anything for closure.” He seemed to want to say more but shook his head.
“I’m not going to take him back if that’s what you’re worried about. I can’t get over him cheating, especially with who he cheated with.”
He let out a breath. “Sometimes people deserve a second chance, and as much as I want to be selfish, I can’t keep you from something you might want.”
I leaned in and kissed his cheek. “Be selfish,” I whispered, and then I opened the door and got out of his car. It was time to confront Wes, already. I was hoping for a few days before he came barging in on me. He hadn’t called or messaged so I thought maybe he’d stay away. I guess I was wrong.
I shut the door, took a deep breath, and stormed over to where Wes was leaning against his truck. The sun was close to setting and the light on the property illuminated his features. He pushed off his truck as if he was going to come to me. I held up my hand. I didn’t want him close.
“What do you want, Wes?”
He didn’t speak for a second. I don’t know if it was because of my tone, or because of what I was wearing.
“To talk to you, baby. I—I miss you.”
I laughed. “Oh really? Did you miss me when you were fucking Alicia?” I was vulgar on purpose.
“Zoe, damn, it wasn’t like that.”
This was going to be good. “Then how was it like, Wes? Looked pretty dirty from where I saw it.”
He shook his head, and I ignored the tear sliding down his cheek. He wasn’t a crier, so I knew it wasn’t some ploy. He was upset, but dammit, so was I.
Chapter 6
“Can we talk, please? Let me explain.”
“There’s not much to explain. You and Alicia were together in ‘our’ house, Wesley. There isn’t much more to explain now, is there?”
“I freaked out.”
“About what?”
“Living together.”
My arms crossed in defense. “You asked me to move in with you. Not the other way around. If you recall, I wasn’t ready to take that step but you convinced me.”
He pushed off and grabbed my hands tightly. “I know. I’m so sorry.”
I yanked my hand back angrily. “Sorry won’t fix this, Wes.”
“What will?”
I shook my head. “Nothing.”
“There has to be something I can do. Come on, Zoe, five years can’t be over because of one mistake.”
My emotions got the better of me and I sobbed. I was hurt and upset. I’d spent all of my life with Wes, even before he became my boyfriend. It wasn’t just a small romance. We were friends first and I wasn’t even actually sure when it turned to more. One day we just were. “You destroyed me, Wes. I can’t ever forget it, and I won’t do it. I won’t sit back and worry that things won’t fall apart again. I’m not my father. You know what it was like with my mother. I watched him suffer because of his love for her. I won’t do the same.”
“Baby, this isn’t the same.”
I wiped the tear away and hugged myself. “But it is.”
He choked back a sob and my knees nearly gave out. I didn’t think it would be so hard. I’d probably always love Wes. He was my first everything, but sometimes things fell apart for a reason. I glanced back at Evan’s car. He was still there watching, but I couldn’t see him.
Wes noticed my attention and he laughed. “Really, Z? This is why you won’t give me a second chance?” I turned back toward him. “Already fucking the old man who’s had his eye on you forever? He’s a fuckin’ perv.”
I fisted my hands. “No he’s not. He cares for me, and no, he isn’t the reason I won’t give you a second chance. Do you hear yourself right now? The Wes I remember wouldn’t talk about Evan like that. And you can’t expect me to get over the fact that you AND Alicia betrayed me. How long has it been going on? Be honest now.”
He blanched and stepped back, relaxing against his truck again. I tapped my foot, waiting. “See, apparently, you’ve been messing around for longer than when I walked in on you. If I didn’t catch you it would have kept going… am I right?”
“I—” he shook his head. “I don’t know… it happened. and then…. I don’t know. It was different. She’s different, but she isn’t you.”
“Yeah of course she’s different, she certainly isn’t me. I’m nothing like her.”
&
nbsp; “I know, that’s why—her offer was so appealing. You can’t say that sex is very enjoyable between us.”
“I could have!”
“Well, it wasn’t for me. I needed something more and she gave it to me. But she doesn’t love me, and I don’t love her.”
That was it. “Go. I don’t want you here anymore. I gave you the chance to talk and all you managed to do was make me feel worse than I already do. You can take your fucked up apology and go home.” I pointed my finger in his chest and I hadn’t even realized I had moved. “Don’t come back. You had your chance, and you lost me. I am done.” I jabbed my finger hard to make my point.
He didn’t move at first and then the next thing I knew he gripped my cheeks and was kissing me. I tightened my lips and kneed him, lightly, as a warning. He let go immediately, knowing I could hurt him.
“Don’t ever do that again.” My voice was calm and my eyes were full of fiery rage. I couldn’t stand the thought of him touching me.
He nodded and shoved a hand in his pocket and opened his truck with the other. He glanced back at me, and I shook my head. I held back my tears, barely. I wondered how he thought telling me she gave him something I didn’t would win me over. I mean, what woman wants to hear her ex-lover say he cheated because she was lacking for him? I stood back and watched the taillights until they disappeared out of the drive. I’d just shut the door on my past—so how come I felt like it wasn’t over yet? Surely, Wes knew it was over and wouldn’t come back. I really didn’t think I could handle seeing him again. It was too raw.
It wasn’t long before I felt Evan’s strong hands on my shoulders. I turned into his chest and sobbed. He didn’t say anything other than sweet nothings I couldn’t understand over my sobbing. He kissed my hair and held me. I think my heart broke all over again. It wasn’t his job to make me feel better. That night that should have been memorable because I’d made love to Evan but it turned into something more. I didn’t want to hurt over Wes, but I couldn’t help it. Then I felt bad because hurting over Wes hurt Evan. I was torn. I knew I’d never go back to Wes, but I couldn’t let Evan be the one to take over and heal me. It wasn’t his job.