by Martina Cole
Even Jackie’s screaming and swearing didn’t affect them, as they had decided to pretend they didn’t know her until the child was delivered.
They wouldn’t do that, of course, but for now they were both enjoying the respite.
Chapter Six
Tommy Halpin was nervous, and this was a completely new concept to him.
He had always felt in charge of his life. Every decision he had ever made was for a reason, either to further his career, or to squeeze as much money as he could out of the low lifes he used for his own ends.
Until now, even though he had mixed with these people on a regular basis, he had always felt that as he was the major contributor to their little arrangements, he was safe. They needed him far more than he needed them.
He had felt important enough never to consider the way he treated them. Unlike his governor, who had a rapport with those he dealt with, Halpin had always felt that he was letting himself down by associating with these people, let alone making out they were friends. Even though these were the men who, after all, were paying his real wages. The wages that provided his family with all the little extras they had come to expect from him.
But tonight the atmosphere was different, it was charged somehow. From the minute Freddie had sat down opposite him Halpin had sensed something was off kilter. Suddenly he felt like an outsider, like the kid at school who tried to be in with the main crowd and could only achieve it by selling out his friends and ultimately himself.
This was not a good feeling for him, it was too close to home. Plus he had drunk a lot of Scotch while he had been waiting, so he was also worried that mentally he was not the full ten shillings. He felt unable to control the situation, something that had rarely happened to him in his life. He was, as his wife said in private, a control freak.
The sad thing was that he was disliked by most of the people in his orbit. Police colleagues and the criminals he dealt with all had that in common. Tommy Halpin was an arrogant bully who had never listened to anyone’s advice and had always considered himself far too clever by half to listen to anyone else’s opinions.
When his governor had shown him the ropes, he had always stressed the main rules: never get pissed on the job, no matter how comfortable you felt with the people you were with; never forget you were dealing with criminals and that they lived by a different set of rules to everyone else; and no matter how nice they were to your face, you could never really be a part of their circle by the very nature of the job you did. To them you would always be a filth, and a bought filth at that.
He knew what he had said was true and he had listened accordingly, all the time thinking that his boss was stating the obvious. He wished he had listened to him properly. He had also told him, watch your back, and never put moody money in the bank, it was too easy to trace. Never leave cash in the house and never buy a car that was under two years old. His main chant, though, had been, never relax, remember who you are dealing with and treat them like you would a rabid dog. You are only useful to them while you can provide a service that they need. His governor had made a big deal about it all, because if he had a capture he would automatically take all his work mates down with him.
The enormity of this was only just seeping into Halpin’s consciousness, the extent of his treachery was finally sinking in. If he had a capture, no one he associated with would ever be trusted again. It was this one fact that made his governor so paranoid. Every honest collar they had felt would automatically be suspect, if they were proved to be on the take. Now, he finally understood his governor’s paranoia about what they were doing and his constant reminders of the seriousness of their situation.
He had forgotten the golden rule, that he was only a means to an end for these people. That there were plenty more where he came from.
Maggie had arrived at the hospital and had automatically taken over from Lena and Maddie. Maggie could handle Jackie and her sympathy was in place, it had not been worn out yet by her sister’s constant swearing.
‘Where is that fucking bastard!’
Maggie didn’t answer her, instead she folded up the bedding from the floor and placed it on a chair.
When a doctor came in another volley of abuse was spewed at him and he retreated without saying a word.
Maggie sighed. ‘You have to be the stupidest cunt on the planet, Jackie, do you know that?’
Jackie’s head snapped towards her little sister in shock. ‘What did you call me?’
Maggie sat on the chair. The bedding was more comfortable than the plastic seat and she appreciated that. She had been on her feet all day at the salon and she was tired out.
‘Oh, don’t give me the shocked looks, it’s your favourite word, you’ve called all the nurses and the doctor it. When are you going to grow up, Jack?’
She pointed at the dishevelled woman angrily. ‘That baby is in distress. If it’s breech then they need to sort it out and if anything happens to it because of your antics, Freddie will go mad.’
She waited while her sister digested this bit of logic before she carried on. ‘We are trying to track him down, but whether he arrives or not, that child has got to be born so why don’t you shut up, stop all this showing off and let the people here get on with the jobs they are paid to do?’
She was calmer now, and Jackie was listening. Maggie knew that the mention of her husband would bring her round.
‘But it hurts, Maggie.’
Maggie smiled sadly. ‘’Course it hurts, it hurt the other three times and all, remember? So let them help and for fuck’s sake act your age, not your bloody shoe size!’
It was a silly saying of Maggie’s and they both smiled then.
‘There’s a young girl in the room next door, and she is only seventeen and your screaming is terrifying her.’
Jackie wiped her running nose with the back of her hand. She felt bad, she was hurting and she needed a drink. Not that she would say that out loud of course. She knew Maggie had a bottle of champagne in her bag and she wished it was all over so she could neck it and settle her nerves.
She wished that just once Freddie would be there for her, see the child born. She had read somewhere that it gave the man a better bond with his children. She couldn’t see it herself, she had been at her children’s births and it had not made any difference at all. They still got on her wick.
‘You have been out of order and if you ain’t careful they will refuse to treat you, Jackie, and your threats will end up with Lily Law at the end of the bed. Now just once in your life, Jackie, stop thinking about yourself, think about someone else.’
The fact that Jackie took it from Maggie told her she was nearly home and dry. But Jackie always caused ructions when she was in labour and she had always got away with it before. This time the staff were not willing to swallow it and Maggie didn’t blame them one iota. She wouldn’t have taken it either. They were threatening to call Old Bill in, and that automatically brought social services. Jackie was such a mess, and if she wasn’t careful she would end up with social workers breathing down her neck again. Maggie loved her sister but at times she really didn’t like her.
‘You are going to let the doctor examine you now, because if the baby’s breech they have to get it sorted.’
Jackie nodded then, digesting her sister’s words. Even she knew she had gone over the top, but it was in her nature. Everything with Jackie had to be a fight, had to be a drama, she couldn’t help it. She had to have the spotlight on her, and her bad behaviour had always guaranteed that she got it.
Now, though, Maggie’s sensible words had made her think about what she was doing. She had threatened one of the nurses with her water glass and she knew that, unlike years before, that could now get her a court appearance and Freddie would not be impressed if that happened.
‘Bring them in.’
Freddie was watching the different expressions on the man’s face and he knew they had him by the short and curlies. He had seen it before so many times
with the tame filth and he loved the feeling it gave him.
People like Halpin had to be brought down gradually, it was a psychological thing. For a while you had to make them feel that even though they were the takers, they were the ones who were actually in control of the situation.
It was easy to do, you just pandered to their natural vanity. Halpin had been under the illusion he was in some way the aggressor in the partnership forged by his old boss, who had in effect served him up to Freddie Jackson as a favour. This manipulation of anyone weaker than yourself was something the likes of Freddie Jackson learned very early in life. Where he had come from you had to learn what his father had jokingly called psychological warfare.
From a kid, Freddie had understood that if you weren’t clever enough, or strong enough, to beat people at their own game, you made sure you either cultivated an innate cunning or learned to use a weapon and developed a good rep as a nutcase, otherwise you became someone else’s gofer.
Halpin was his gofer now and he was going to enjoy explaining that to him. Halpin, like most of the police who were on the take, had been on the receiving end of people like Freddie all their life. It was the main reason he had turned to crime fighting. The natural respect for the uniform, the very nature of the job, it was an automatic choice for a lot of people, because it was the only way they could ever be in a position of authority. But the Halpins of this world didn’t just want the respect from Joe Public, they also wanted inside the wallets of the criminals.
They were so easy to bring into the fold, they were like lambs to the slaughter, and they were also what made Britain so great.
There was a fine line between the robber and the filth, and in most cases the robber would rather have a capture off a decent Old Bill. Not off a taker like Halpin. In its own way that was an insult to them and their craft. It was hard to get to the real strong policemen, they were decent men who were quite happy to live their lives on the right side of the law and they did not see the dealers’ or the bank robbers’ lifestyles as something to emulate. They saw it as something to destroy.
Now Halpin, who could sense the change in Freddie and young Jimmy, was just beginning to understand that the people he thought he controlled, actually controlled him.
Freddie loved this bit, it was what he lived for. Freddie Jackson loved to bully, it was instinctive and it was what got him out of bed every morning.
Jackie was in agony, real agony and Jackie being Jackie was letting everyone know that once more. At least now she had good reason, as she was well on for the birth itself.
‘Oh, keep your noise down, you silly mare.’
Her mother’s voice was not as sympathetic as she expected. It was upsetting for Jackie to hear her mother talk to her like that, considering her mother-in-law was also in the room with them. Maddie was not impressed and Jackie could see that, but Jackie was the one having the baby and she was determined to make the most of her time in the limelight whatever her mother thought.
Maggie had shot off somewhere and Jackie’s good intentions had flown out the window again. It was late and no one seemed able to track Freddie down. She was convinced he was with a prostitute. The picture of him with some young girl with tight skin and no stretchmarks was becoming larger in her mind by the second.
A young Chinese nurse was trying to get her to sip at a glass of water, and Jackie was abusing her loudly, trying to knock the glass from her hand. Lena was ashamed of her daughter and the way she was acting. From her bad language to her racist comments to the nurses, she was a disgrace.
The young nurse, who had been brought up in Upney above her parents’ chip shop, was losing her patience.
‘Fuck off, and leave me alone, you fucking Chinky bastard!’ Jackie’s voice was loud, determined and full of hate.
The girl, a superb nurse who was already sick and tired of her job and the abuse she had to take on a daily basis, said angrily, ‘Sod you, too. You want to make it harder then you go for it.’
As she left the room in a huff, Lena smiled at her apologetically. At least the girl had a bit of spunk, which is more than could be said for her daughter.
She walked over to the bed, where Jackie was kicking the bedding on to the floor for the umpteenth time, and writhing around as if she was possessed. Anyone would think this was the first child ever to be born. She knew the child was OK, the doctor had already assured them it was a normal delivery, so now Jackie was back to her normal obnoxious self. She had alienated all the nurses and all the doctors again, so even a cup of tea was now out of the question.
Lena felt she was just about ready to blow herself. ‘You have to stop this, Jackie, you are making a fool of yourself. It ain’t like it’s your first, is it?’
Jackie was clenching her fists once more, in temper, but her mother’s voice was telling her she had pushed them all to the limit and she knew when to let things go. Freddie’s mother was looking at her like she was nothing as usual, and it was hurting her. But Freddie loved his mother and if it took Maddie Jackson to get him here then she would do whatever it took.
‘Has anyone tracked him down yet?’
Lena shook her head and said in exasperation, ‘What do you think? What do you want him here for, anyway? He would only get in the way.’
Jackie was not listening, she was at the end of her tether with the thought of her husband out enjoying himself while she was in agony giving birth to his child.
‘He would rather be with those whores in that brothel than with his wife. Has anyone rung the place in Ilford?’
They had rung everywhere, Freddie knew where she was, there was no way he had not heard about the situation. Liselle at the pub had indicated that he was there, and that he had already been appraised of the situation regarding his wife.
Freddie could not give a flying fuck and they all knew it. Why didn’t Jackie just accept that he would not come until the child was delivered? Maggie had just left to cab it over to the pub, so hopefully he might deign to make an appearance, but no one was holding their breath.
Maddie sighed heavily, and Lena followed suit. For once the two women were united, and it was this sudden friendliness that made Jackie take notice of what they were saying.
Lena started in first. ‘That fucking child has got to come out, right? So stop fucking about and get on with it. If the baby is born Freddie might be more inclined to get his arse over here.’
Jackie was crying. Her big moon face was red, covered in a heat rash, and shiny with her tears. Maddie stared at her for long moments. She looked awful, and the way she was lying with her legs open, the purple stretchmarks on show, and her toenails ingrained with dirt did not help her one little bit. In her heart Maddie didn’t blame her son for wanting to keep away, she was more amazed that he had impregnated the dirty bitch in the first place.
Jackie’s crying was getting louder now. She wanted her husband and the fact he would not be coming made her want him all the more. She sounded like an animal, but not a nice animal like a cat, mewling gently as it gave birth. She sounded like one of the animals where Maddie had grown up. And the worst of it all was she looked like one of them. From her bloated face to her dirty feet. Her mother had always referred to the dirty women around their estate as animals, it was an Irish thing. Maddie’s mother judged people by the way their children were turned out and how well they managed their money. She had followed suit, and still felt that a woman’s kids said more about her than anything else. If the children were clean and cared for, fed and watered, the woman was classed as decent. Jackie’s whole way of life disturbed her. Her son’s wife should be a reflection on him, and she had a terrible feeling that this girl was.
Jackie was groaning once more, and her face was screwed up in pain. She was only having a baby, anyone would think she was dying of cancer or something the way she was carrying on. How her son had ever seen fit to mate with her was beyond Maddie’s comprehension. Yet she loved his girls, and they in their own way loved her. But she fou
nd it difficult to go to the house, because Jackie made it all so hard. Jackie was jealous of her, his mother. She had never tried to make a friend of her, even when Freddie had been banged up she had not attempted a modicum of friendship. The prison visits had been timed so they would not meet.
It grieved her that her favourite son had married this baggage, who, even now, could not keep herself clean and tidy for the hospital. To Maddie, appearances were everything, and how the world perceived you and your wifely skills was of tantamount importance. Yet all she ever heard about Jackie was how she was making a show of herself. When her Freddie had been put away, she had had to step in when Jackie had overspent on catalogues and then not even attempted to pay, and deal with the embarrassment of finding out that Jackie had gone all over the place ordering stuff and then threatening women with her husband’s family if they tried to get what they were owed. To top it all, she’d had her own husband telling her that she had better sort it all out because the embarrassment was killing him. Then, after all she had done for her, she had to contend with Jackie looking at her in that disrespectful way she had, the girls sitting there all scruffy, with their pretty faces stained with sweets.
She remembered Jackie telling her that she needed help now Freddie was gone, that she needed clothes for the kids and food on the table, when everyone knew any money she laid her hands on went on drink and drugs. Expensive hobbies that once more put her daughter-in-law in debt.
Another one of Maddie’s foibles was debt. She could not understand spending what you didn’t have. When she had found herself paying off her daughter-in-law’s debts it had been the final straw. Hundreds of pounds on clothes for her and the girls, clothes she wasn’t even going to look after, that ended up in a washing pile and stayed there. It was all wrong, everything had gone all wrong.