by Soraya Naomi
She goes to platform two, and I read the departure information on the screen – destination is Lake Forest. She better be visiting her parents and not going where I’m afraid she’s heading. But I know Fallon, and since she’s dressed in all black, my guess is that she’s probably going to Danny’s funeral.
I clutch my hands in my hair and give a wild tug as the train departs, and then I return to my car to drive to the train station in Lake Forest.
***
I’m standing right outside the exit doors of the Lake Forest station, waiting for Fallon. The train has arrived because people are starting to come out. She’s one of the last people to walk out, and I step in behind her, inhaling her familiar perfume before speaking, “Hey.”
She spins around so rapidly that I immediately steady her, but she brushes me off roughly.
“What are you doing here?” Her eyes dart around, making sure we’re not alone.
Is she seriously that afraid of me?
This is starting to annoy me. I edge closer to her as she inches back, and I keep moving forward while she’s retreating.
“What are you doing here is the more important question,” I counter evenly as I grip her upper arm and steer her in the direction of my car. “Where are you going?”
She draws in a deep breath, and her eyes drop to my lips and quickly back up. I still have the same effect on her as she has on me. However, she stops suddenly, and I make sure to stand as close to her as possible.
“I’m sure you already know.” She keeps her back straight.
I look past her and lean in to whisper in her ear, “Then you must also know that I’m here to take you back.” And I circle my arm around her waist, hugging her to me while scanning the area around us.
Her sweet perfume wafts around me. She smells so good. My home.
I palm the back of her head when she drapes her arms around my neck and actually returns my embrace. I nuzzle her hair and breathe her in.
“I want to say goodbye to Danny, Luca,” she mutters.
“I get that, but it’s not safe. We have to leave.”
“No. Don’t take this away from me too.”
When her soft lips connect with my cheek, a shiver runs up my spine.
“Please,” she adds softly.
She’s trying to be sly!
I sigh and temper my outrage at how she’s willing to play me. “No. Don’t play games with me, Fallon. You will lose.” Pulling back, I place my hands on her shoulders. “Get in the car. You can’t go to the funeral. You can’t take a chance on being linked to anything that might be deemed suspicious right now.”
Her eyes narrow, but she covers her stunned reaction.
“What’s wrong?” I ask.
“You are,” she snaps. “Here you are, still trying to control everything in my life.”
“No...I think there’s something else. Is there something you need to tell me?” I crowd her again, backing her up against my vehicle.
“I thought you knew everything?!” Her tone is filled with acrimony.
So there is something else. I’ll find out anyway, but it pisses me off that she’s still withholding from me. “Last time, get in the car, Fallon.”
She rounds the vehicle and gets inside, loudly slamming the door closed.
“Don’t vent on my car, please,” I say dryly and gesture to her to buckle up.
The entire drive back, she refuses to even look my way, but I still attempt to spark up a conversation.
“How have you been doing?” I ask.
In return, I get silence.
Gripping the steering wheel, I decide to lay it out there and make myself vulnerable this once. “Talk to me, dolcezza. Mi manchi così tanto. I miss you so much. It feels like I haven’t spoken to you in weeks.”
She sighs and blinks a few times but continues to stare stoically at the scenery outside, completely ignoring me for the entire hour it takes for us to reach her apartment.
As we park in front of her building, she confesses in a soft voice, “I can’t do this, Luca.” And she opens the door to step out, then closes it quietly.
I’m forced to watch her walk away from me again.
CHAPTER 4
Luca
I sit on my terrace in only my sweatpants and turn my attention away from Chicago’s skyline to the almost empty bottle on the table while rubbing my sweaty hand down my face. I feel miserable because I haven’t spoken to Fallon since Tuesday. The sky is darkening on this depressing Sunday, and when the wind whips across my face, I swear I hear her voice. I take another swig straight from the bottle and let the whiskey numb my battered heart. My head falls back against the chair, too heavy for my neck to support. She doesn’t leave my thoughts for a second, not even in my drunken, nearly-passed-out state.
Fallon, what are you doing?
Placing the bottle back on the table, I check my phone to see if she’s messaged me back. I’ve texted and called her several times to make sure she’s okay because not knowing what or how she’s doing is fucking killing me, but she’s ignored every one of them. My vision doubles, and the haziness of being excessively drunk is working its way through my body. However, I don’t pass out – which is the one thing I desperately want. The phone, which has fallen into my lap, vibrates, and I hurriedly grab it, hoping to see her name flash across the screen. Sadly, it’s not Fallon.
I release a ragged breath and answer.
“What the fuck happened to Camilla?” Adriano barks angrily.
“What?”
“Where’s Cam, Luca? Did you do something to her?”
Completely confused, I rake my hair back with one hand. “What are you talking about?”
“I can’t reach Cam. Her phone has been disconnected, and I just went by her apartment – it’s been vacated,” he explains.
“Adriano, we didn’t do anything. You know I wouldn’t do that, and James has nothing to do with Cam. If she’s gone, it’s because she wants to be gone.”
“Merda! Farò di tutto per trovarla.” Shit! I’ll do anything to find her. “You need to come back to work because I can’t cover for you anymore. You have a meeting with James tomorrow at the warehouse that you can’t forget. We need you, Luca, and I can tell you’ve been drinking.” He sighs tiredly.
“I’m coming in tomorrow. Don’t bother me again tonight.” I press end and decide to make one last call before retiring to my bedroom.
“Follow Fallon Michaels. Day and night. You report directly to me, and only me, every day,” I quickly instruct David and get up, sliding the door open to head to my bedroom.
Sleep eludes me as I lie in bed. When Fallon was in my bed, my favorite position was spooning her. When I felt her soft body tucked against mine, I was content because she was under the protection of my body. Even when our spirits were separated while dreaming, we were still connected physically. But now, she’s completely out of reach, and I don’t know how to protect her anymore. How do I protect someone who doesn’t even want it?
***
I pull the key out of the ignition and enter the warehouse where I’m meeting James. I’ve sobered up this morning, ensuring that my mind is clear and focused. Pushing through the door, I’m greeted by James and Salvatore, who are standing in the middle of the otherwise empty space.
“Luca,” they both welcome as the door bangs shut, and I close the distance.
Why is Salvatore here? Nervous prickles run down my arm, and I realize that I left my gun in the glove compartment and am unarmed. After forcing a stiff nod, I stop in front of James.
“Where have you been all week, Luca?” James takes one step toward me.
“Home.”
“Were you with Fallon?”
“No,” I assure him with a frown.
“Son, what’s happening to you? She’s either in or out, and if she’s out, you need to distance yourself from her. Ti sta distruggendo; non te ne rendi conto?” She’s destroying you; can’t you see that?
Salvatore decides to give h
is opinion. “Adriano is good at handling our business, but we need the underboss, Luca. Pull yourself together and stop drinking. You know where that will lead you.”
Then James braces a hand around my neck forcefully and looks me straight in the eye. “I need the underboss in control of his emotions. I’ve given you free rein with her, but that time is over. Don’t force me to do something I don’t want to do. I gave you a second chance – now get your shit together.”
This is a clear threat. This is how the Syndicate works. The moment you become a liability, they’ll eliminate you. And James is the only one who can make me disappear without a trace.
In a harsh tone that’s unlike him, James adds, “Ti è chiaro?” Am I getting through to you? “Check your phone, Luca. We’ve left you dozens of messages. Your Fallon is unemployed and under investigation. Did she tell you that? Did she give you a heads-up? Does she think of your safety?”
That’s what she was hiding last Tuesday. I’m not even shocked to find out it’s something this important, but I am furious that she continues to distrust me.
I shake James off and hold up my palm, indicating that I’m calm. “What kind of investigation?”
“Alex left a note in his safe, mentioning to contact Fallon Michaels if anything happened to him,” Salvatore replies.
Now shock is registering. She’s under investigation for Alex’s death? “How did we miss that? Why wasn’t that note destroyed before it became part of the official police investigation?”
How did I miss that? I was following her for days – no police officers paid her a visit, and she never set foot inside a precinct.
“For one – because you’ve been drunk for an entire week, and second, because your dear friend, Collopy, is on the case,” James answers and sends me a dissatisfied look.
The tension in this huge space has diminished, and I come to terms with the fact that she’s not mine to help anymore. She doesn’t want it.
Yet my boss does need me. I see the glint of hope he has for me. I’m like a son to him, but while it might hurt him to end me, he would do it for the good of the Syndicate. Fortunately, he has a weak spot for me, and I take full advantage of that.
“James, avevo proprio bisogno di questo tempo. Chiedo scusa. Lei è una debolezza che non posso permettermi, ti ho sentito.” I needed this time. I apologize. She’s a weakness I can’t afford; I heard you.
“We need you on top of things,” James reminds me sternly.
From now on, I’m done following Fallon. She can come to me if she wants my help. “Give me an update on everything.”
This was the wake-up call I needed.
CHAPTER 5
Luca
The entire week, I throw myself back into business. Fallon has no clue how foolish she is by not confiding in me. She’s putting the only person who could possibly help her in danger; what if the cops caught me following her? I can’t be associated with this case, or with any case for that matter. She’s off limits now; at least the investigation forces me to stay away. My life depends on it. My anger toward her prevails, and I’m starting to push her to the back of my mind. But as the days pass, I find that it’s easier said than done.
On Tuesday, I meet with my accountant to transfer money. Alex’s brother apparently shut down Charity Events, and I know Fallon must be looking for a new job.
On Wednesday, Adriano and I meet up in The Blackhall’s gym for a light workout since we’re both still experiencing minor pains from the explosion, and I share my concerns about the incident at the house.
“Adriano, you’re not going to like what I have to say, but hear me out, okay?”
He nods, full of curiosity.
“I remember Fallon saying that she and Cam escaped the house that night via the back entrance, which means they rounded the house and walked past the hedges.”
Adriano’s face falls when he realizes where my train of thought is leading.
“The explosion ignited precisely by those hedges, and now Cam’s suddenly missing, without a trace.”
“What exactly are you getting at, Luca? That Cam planted it?”
“Well, it wasn’t Fallon; I’m positive of that. Biagio was quite adamant that it wasn’t Leggia’s doing either. We have to look into this. It’s pretty suspicious that her phone is disconnected and she’s become untraceable right after she’s left our employment and a bomb exploded!”
“No, she’s terrified because we fired her after her botched escape attempt with Fallon, and that’s why she’s disappeared.” He plows his hand through his hair. “I’m still looking for Cam, but I’m getting dead ends everywhere.”
“While I initially also thought she left because of her fear, it is possible that we missed something. I, for one, haven’t been in control of all our dealings lately, if you haven’t noticed. These kinds of coincidences don’t just happen.”
“Where the hell would she get a bomb? Not at Walmart,” Adriano disputes.
“You have to stop seeing her as Cam and start accepting that it could be a possibility. It’s time I talk to Fallon because we’re in the dark here. We don’t know what they discussed together in the house, and since I’m not following Fallon anymore, I don’t know if she’s been in contact with Cam. But I had David trailing her, and I never ended his assignment. I’ll give him a picture of Cam so that he can keep an eye out for her, and I’ll check Fallon’s phone records and stop by to see her.” Although I’m not looking forward to speaking with her because I’m still filled with a dangerous mix of anger, hurt, unanswered passion and love for her.
“Are you sure? I could go,” he offers.
It would be wiser to have Adriano talk to Fallon, but I know her better. If she tries to deceive me, I’ll know, and I won’t let her play me for a fool again. “No, I will talk to her this weekend.” A huge part of me comes alive again with the prospect of seeing Fallon. The part I’m trying to suppress with all my power.
***
Two days later, I decide to pay Collopy a visit. It’s time I take back the upper hand.
I watch her leave the precinct and get take-out at a Chinese restaurant on the way to her house. As Kelli Ann leaves the restaurant with her order, I wait for her outside.
“Isn’t this a nice surprise, DeMiliano,” she utters as she brushes past me.
I stay right behind her until she rounds the corner onto a less crowded street.
“What’s up, Luca?” she taunts without facing me.
“We need to talk.”
“Oh, so I have your attention, finally.” Kelli Ann stops and turns. Her eyes meet mine, and the corner of her lip twitches up.
Clasping my fingers around her arm, I steer us in the direction of the closest deserted alley. She gasps when I shove her against the wall, and an eager grin spreads across her face.
Calmly, I take her bag of food and set it on the ground, then I block her with both my arms and my body before she can reach for her gun under her blazer and say, “Alex Gentry?”
“I knew that case would interest you. Or better yet, the woman tied to that case. What’s her name again?”
She rubs herself against me, forcing me to step back quickly, but I keep my palms planted against the wall beside her ears.
“Why isn’t that case closed, Kelli Ann?” I demand in a low voice.
She straightens and moves in close to whisper in my ear, “Because you leave me no choice, Luca.”
What the fuck does that mean?
And she tries to kiss me, but I stop her by her shoulders. “What. Do. You. Want.”
“You. I can make the—”
“Did you write that note about her and plant it in Alex’s safe?”
“Her? Can’t you say her name? Who is Fallon Michaels to you?” she spits and continues in a vindictive tone when I remain quiet. “What, you think Alex wrote it? No, he wasn’t that smart. You need me to help you now. Usually it’s the other way around. I kind of dig it. I’ve been very lenient toward Miss Michaels, but
I can make her an official suspect, DeMiliano.”
I’ve had enough of this woman, so I spin her around roughly, snatch her handgun from the holster underneath her blazer, and press her body between mine and the wall while pointing her piece at her temple. “Do not threaten Fallon.” With my free hand, I push the side of her face against the wall and slide my thumb down the butt of the gun while exhaling a ragged breath to control my rage. “You have one week to clean up your mess, Collopy, or I will end you.” Too bad it’s an idle threat since she’s law enforcement, which would stir up too much trouble. Trouble James won’t accept.
I push against her when she ignores me.
“Okay,” she mutters with a gasp.
Wiping my fingerprints from her handgun with my sleeve, I throw it next to her food and leave the alley to drive directly home.
By the time I arrive at my penthouse, I’m absolutely furious. I can’t believe I’m still doing damage control for Fallon; she should’ve told me about the investigation.
***
Saturday night rolls around quickly, and I find myself across the street from Fallon’s apartment in my car. I’ve been preparing myself to talk to her, and I hoped that I was ready to face her without needing an excessive amount of alcohol afterward to wipe her from my thoughts. However, I wasn’t ready to face what I’m witnessing now. She’s exquisite in a black lace dress as she emerges from her apartment. A few people moving past her check her out, and as always, she’s oblivious to their attention. But then a guy walks out behind her, also exiting her apartment.
My knuckles turn white from gripping the steering wheel while sweat moistens my palms.
He places his hand on the small of her back, and a red haze sweeps through my vision. I blink a few times to ensure my eyes aren’t deceiving me.
She’s on a fucking date!
I release my death grip and lean back, then I lean forward and rest my forehead on the steering wheel. The pure rage coursing through me practically incapacitates me. Rearing back again, I clutch my hair with one hand and watch her leave with another man.
Then I contact Adriano. “She’s on a date.”