“You taste delicious when you come, baby.”
I don’t even have the energy to smile at his sexy words.
A loud knock at the door re-focuses my hazy mind. Neither of us acknowledges it until it sounds again.
“Ignore it,” I complain.
“Don’t worry. I will,” Seb purrs in my ear. His fingers release my wrists and the blindfold.
The knocking echoes through the house again, louder this time, and I can hear my phone ringing from downstairs. Clearly, someone wants our attention.
The look on Seb’s face promises death. I pity whoever might be at the door. I hide my giggle as he moves to deal with the untimely interruption.
“Please don’t go. We’re not finished here.”
“I’ll be right back.They really aren’t getting the message.”
I watch Seb stalk out of the room and listen for the commotion that is sure to follow. Instead of the prompt slamming of the door all I hear is a few faint voices. The endorphins rushing around my blood soothe the annoyance I’d normally feel.
A few moments later, Seb appears at the bedroom door, looking decidedly put out.
“Your parents have decided to visit early,” he grinds out.
“They’re here?” I bolt upright in shock.
“Yes.”
“Downstairs?”
“Yes, Izzy. I told them you were in the shower, so you better get your arse downstairs.”
“Why did you let them in?”
“I couldn’t turn them away, could I?”
I rush to the bathroom and grab my robe.
“Mum, I’ll be down in a few minutes,” I shout from the top of the stairs, mortified that they have turned up early and unannounced.
I turn back to Seb. “I’m so sorry.” I gush at Seb.
“You know, next year we’re going away. I want you to myself with no interruptions.” Seb’s usually the definition of control. I can see he’s about to lose it.
“Mum, Dad, what are you doing here?” I ask as I enter the living room to greet them.
“We wanted to beat the holiday traffic tomorrow. We thought it would be a surprise.”
“Well, it was certainly a surprise. Let me get you a cup of tea, and I’ll go and get dressed. Seb will be down in a minute.”
I make tea before heading back upstairs.
I can hear the shower running and slip into the bathroom. I open the door to see if I can try and relieve Seb but snatch my hand back as the icy water splashes on my arm.
“It’s cold!”
“How else do you propose I calm myself down.”
I lick my lips, feeling decidedly naughty and beckon Seb out of the shower.
“I warn you, Izzy. I’m not in a particularly pleased mood. If you get down on your knees, I’m going to fuck your mouth hard and fast.”
I don’t need to answer. Instead, I lower to my knees and wait for him to take what he needs. He turns the water off and steps from the shower.
He strokes his solid cock and holds it out for me. I wrap my lips around the tip and pull him deeper into my heat. His fingers tangle in my hair to hold me in place and prevent my withdrawal before he rolls his hips, pushing his shaft all the way to the back of my throat. I relax my jaw and let my tongue go to work, licking around the underside and the enflamed head as he pulls out before ramming back into my mouth.
He groans loudly as he drops his head back and finds a punishing pace that I struggle to keep up with. Saliva seeps from my mouth, aiding his strokes. He punches his way down my throat until I nearly gag as hot streams of come pour into my mouth.
“Fuck. I needed that. Thank you,” Seb breaths out. I give him my best sexy smile.
“Come on. We need to look presentable for my parents.”
“I might need to get back in the cold shower.”
“Be my guest. I’ll just admire the view.”
Ten minutes later we both make it downstairs in a fit state to welcome my Mum and Dad. Seb makes tea while I give Mum a quick tour of the house.
“We’re still renting until we find something that we fall in love with.”
“This is quite some house, though, Izzy. Very nice.”
I wait to see if she says anything further, but she doesn’t.
The sudden urge to hear her question me about a family and children grates at my heart. I would never have wanted that in the past, hell, even last week. My thoughts are scattered all over the place.
We’d only moved here temporarily. I didn’t want Seb to buy a house simply because he could. Perhaps now was the right time to reconvene our search?
“Izzy?” Mum looks at me expectantly.
“Sorry, yes?”
“Are we done?”
“Oh, yes. I’ll get Seb to bring up your bags.” I lead Mum back into the kitchen where, by the sounds of things, Seb and my father are talking sports.
“So, now that we’re here do you have any plans for tomorrow?” Mum looks expectantly at me.
“Not really, sorry Mum. I was going to give the house a once-over before you arrived. Seb has to work in the morning.”
“That’s fine. We can certainly look after ourselves. Perhaps we could pop into Bath for some last minute shopping?”
“Really, Diane? On Christmas Eve?” Dad detests shopping at the best of times, let alone on one of the busiest shopping days of the year. I catch the frosty glare she throws his way and hide my smirk with my cup of tea.
“Perhaps we can discuss it at breakfast. If you don’t mind, I’m going to get an early night. I want to make the most of tomorrow now that we’re here.”
“I’ll bring your bags up, Diane.” Seb leaves the kitchen with Mum.
“It’s good to see you happy again, kiddo.” Dad puts his arm around me and pulls me to his side. He’s not the most affectionate, but these small gestures, when they do come, mean the world.
“Thanks, Dad. I am.”
“Sorry about the early arrival. Your mother can be… insistent.”
“It’s fine. Although a little warning would have been nice.”
“Right. I better be going to bed as well. Seems like there will be shopping on the agenda tomorrow. Night, kiddo.”
“Night, Dad.”
“I can’t believe our luck. I’m sorry about this evening.” I pull back the duvet and climb into bed.
“I’m trying to see the funny side. I suppose it’s not every day you're interrupted in the middle of sex.”
“By your in-laws.” Laughter erupts from my chest, and I slam a hand over my mouth before rolling into Seb’s warm body. He pulls me against him and holds me tight.
My giggling ceases when my mind skips forward nine months and the thought of a baby in our lives. We’d constantly be interrupted. We’d have another person to put first and prioritise over anything that we wanted. This is our first Christmas as husband and wife, and we’ve not even managed to celebrate together. There won’t be any other opportunities if I’m pregnant.
“Are you going to go shopping with your Mum tomorrow?”
“Maybe.”
“Hey, what’s wrong?”
“I just wish we’d been able to have some time for us. It seems that whenever we try, life gets in the way.”
“There’s going to be plenty of time for us. We might have been on a clock in the past, but that’s not how things are now, and they haven’t been for a while. What’s brought all of this on?”
“Christmas, maybe. Getting back to a normal life?”
“But that’s what I want with you. I’ve waited a long time for this. For you. I love you, and I love our life together. The D/s as well as the normal day-to-day and mundane.”
“And I love you.” I look up to see worry etched on Seb’s handsome face.
“You need to tell me what’s got you so out of sorts.”
“What do you want in the future? We’re still in this house. We haven’t talked about family or anything like that. I suppose I’ve got some questio
ns that’s all.” I brace for the conversation I never wanted to initiate, but can’t help but need to know.
“I wanted to have you in our own home a long time ago. Renting was a compromise. I learnt that I couldn’t push you too hard or too fast. It worked because you’re now my wife.” He places a loving kiss on the top of my head as I snuggle in closer to his body. “We can look for a house in the new year. I know you wanted to contribute, and you have the money to do it. Maybe now’s the right time. As for a family, I’ve never given it much consideration.”
“Okay. That sounds like a plan.”
I lie in silence, calmed by the steady rise and fall of Seb’s chest.
“Good night,” I whisper.
“Night, baby.”
My eyes may have closed, but sleep evades me. A hundred things are racing through my mind. I know I was vague about what was on my mind, and Seb will no doubt be disappointed that I didn’t tell him the full truth about what worried me. Some couples would give anything to be parents. Shouldn't I be excited about this possibility?
I’m restless for what feels like the rest of the night. However, I’m asleep when Seb wakes me in the morning to say goodbye.
“I’ll be back by one, I promise.”
“See you later. Love you.”
“I love you.”
I think I made the decision before I drifted to sleep last night. I need to find out if I am pregnant or not. I can’t keep wondering and make plans or decisions that may never be warranted.
The electronic bell surprises me as I push open the door to the local pharmacy. Christmas displays greet me as I take a quick look around to find the family planning section. I take in the assortment of choices that exist to find out if I’m pregnant. Early response, digital test, single or double, ovulation kits. I grab what looks like a fail-safe test and take it to the till.
“That certainly will be a special Christmas present,” the older lady comments as she rings up the sale.
“Pardon?”
“Your test. I hope it goes the way you want.”
I hand her the money with what I’m sure is a grimace covering my face.
“Merry Christmas.”
“Yes, Merry Christmas.” I stuff the test back in my bag and rush out of the store.
Mum and Dad have braved the Christmas shoppers, so I have the house to myself when I arrive home. I head to the kitchen and pour a large glass of water before downing it all at once.
A sick ball of nerves poisons my stomach and turns me into a juddering wreck. Christmas was meant to be my happy time, not something I dreaded. God, how was I going to tell Seb if I was pregnant? Would he resent me for burdening him with a baby so soon after marrying me?
I snatch up the test and go upstairs to the bedroom. My fingers dig through the cardboard packaging for the white and blue test. I follow the instructions and then set the timer on my phone for three minutes and wait.
It is amazing how long three minutes can be when the result will change your life forever. I pace the bedroom unable to keep still. My heart stampedes in my chest as the nerves get the better of me.
After an age, the alarm sounds in the bathroom, ringing pleasantly as if it has good news. I grab the plastic stick and turn it over, my eyes honing in on the little box with the result.
The blue line runs horizontally through the window. No plus sign. Not pregnant.
A sob bursts from my chest and echoes in the bathroom. I drop the test and seal my mouth with my hand to stop any more outbursts, but it is all in vain. Tears stream from my eyes as I collapse onto our bed. I weep hard, body-wrenching tears.
I should be happy. I didn’t want to be pregnant. I didn’t want my life with Seb to change so soon.
“Izzy? Are you home?” I hear Mum call from the hall. I can’t control my cries enough to answer her and just continue to blub.
“Izzy? Darling, what’s wrong?” Mum’s at the door to our room and takes one look at me before opening her arms to me.
“Shh shh shh. What’s the matter? I’m sure it can be fixed.”
“I’m… not… pregnant,” I stutter out.
“Oh, dear. You don’t need to start worrying yet. I’m sure you can’t have been trying for long.” She strokes down my back trying to soothe my hysterics.
“No. I didn’t… want to be pregnant.”
“And now you’re sad?”
“Yes! How can I be upset… over something I didn’t want?” I sniff as more tears trail down my face. Mum gently sways us as we sit on the edge of the bed, our arms wrapped around one another.
I cling to my mum as I’ve never done in the past. Confusion plagues my mind as my emotions cascade through me.
“Have you talked to Seb?”
“No. He doesn’t even know I took a test.”
“Why would you keep this from him?”
“Because I don’t know how he feels about children. I didn’t want kids. I didn’t want to be pregnant. What was the point of telling him until I knew?”
“And now you don’t know what to do or how you feel?”
“Yes.” Another wave of sobs tumble from me at my confession. I don’t know how I feel about any of this.
“Tuck yourself up into bed. I’ll go and bring you a cup of tea and send Seb up when he gets back. You need to talk to him about all of this.”
“Thanks, Mum.” I gingerly unlock my hold of her and crawl into bed. She gently smoothes the hair from my face as my eyes close in emotional exhaustion. I focus on her touch and will my mind to shut off until I can talk through all of this with Seb.
I don’t notice when she leaves, but I do notice when Seb takes her place.
“Iz, your Mum said you needed to talk to me.” I peel my eyes open and see Seb lying on his side next to me. His eyes are more blue than green in this light, and I wonder if our children would have my eyes or his?
My throat feels itchy and dry, and my eyes are sore from the tears, but I feel calmer than I did earlier.
“What’s the time?” I ask.
“Just past one. Want to tell me what’s going on? And I’d appreciate the full story now.” I don’t miss the undercurrent of annoyance from Seb. I can’t blame him.
I pull myself up and throw myself around Seb, squeezing him so there're only the layers of our clothes between us.
“I thought I was pregnant,” I mumble against his neck.
“Okay. And?”
“I’m not.” Tears creep back into my eyes and burn my throat as I struggle to keep the emotion inside.
“Did you want us to be?”
“No. But then I took the test, and it was negative, and I was sad.”
“So you did want us to be.”
“I’m not sure. All I know is that I’m feeling teary and mixed up right now, and we’ve not even talked about kids, and I’ve landed all of this on you.”
“Baby,” Seb pulls my face from hiding, and he tilts my head up with gentle thumbs, so I’m looking into his eyes. “No, we’ve not discussed children. Would I have a baby with you? Absolutely. Would I be happy if you were pregnant now? Yes. Am I happy that you’ve kept this from me and skirted around the truth for the last week or so? No. I’m already looking forward to your punishment.”
“I didn’t even know how I felt about all of this. I didn’t know what to say.” My defence is feeble.
“We communicate with each other. That’s always been our rule, and when we stop following it, things get messed up. Now, want to tell me why you’re so upset?”
Safely wrapped in Seb’s arms, and with the initial shock and questions out the way, I relax and open up about my worries and fears. I don’t leave anything out and confess how selfish I felt about having to share our time with a baby.
“I don’t think it's selfish that you want time for us. I want that too. And lately, it’s been more difficult than it has been in the past. Life can get in the way sometimes, but we always need to make time for each other. We can work on that.”
> “So, you wouldn’t mind if we had a baby and turned our worlds upside down?”
“I’d say that I’d rather plan for a baby and agree when we both thought the time was right for us, rather than have a surprise pregnancy. Although there is something amazingly sexy about the thought of you pregnant with my child.” Seb’s stubble grazes my cheek as he kisses my throat and neck, moving towards my lips to kiss me.
“Do you want to have a baby, Izzy?”
“Not in nine months, but yes. I think I do.” I smile. A sense of relief warms my heart. Seb’s answering smile has my heart bursting with love.
“Okay then. Do you feel better now that we’ve talked?”
“Yes. Part of me knew I should have mentioned something. But I was so unsure of how I felt. I didn’t want to say anything until I knew for sure. I didn’t expect to be this upset.” I can’t help but feel foolish for all the drama I’ve caused. Seb just keeps me cuddled to him.
“I know it’s only Christmas Eve, but perhaps we could start our own tradition.” Seb releases me and rolls to his side of the bed and opens the top drawer. He hands me an envelope wrapped in a red satin ribbon.
“What’s this?” I sit up and wipe the remaining tears from my face.
“Your Christmas gift.”
“Are we doing gifts on Christmas Eve now, because I think I’d love you even more than I already do if we can.” My excitement bubbles over as I look between Seb and the envelope that’s burning a hole in my hands.
“Yes, we can.” At his words, I prise the thick envelope open and pull out a glossy card with a photo of an impressive sail-shaped hotel perched on the edge of a beach. I pull the remaining folded sheets of paper from the envelope and scan the words.
Confirmation… hotel stay… Barcelona… April…
“We’re going to Barcelona?”
“Yes. I thought a short break would be just what we’d want.”
“We’ve only just come back from New York?”
“And?”
“I don’t know. I suppose,” my words fade on my lips. “Thank you. It looks amazing, and I can’t wait. Thank you.” I had to start accepting that Seb treated me like a princess at times and there didn’t need to be an ulterior motive.
The Izzy and Seb Collection: The Evermore Series Books 1, 2 and 2.5 Page 56