by Joan Davis
Honor leaned forward and took one of Lela’s hands. “I hear your Uncle Gabriel is coming back today. That’s a good thing, right?”
Sighing, Lela said. “He’s been gone a long time. I miss him.”
“But he calls you on the phone, I bet. I know he probably misses you a whole lot too,” Honor said coaxingly.
“Yeah, but it’s not the same as him being here,” Lela said, plucking at one of the strings of the guitar.
Looking for anything that might distract Lela, Honor asked, “Where is Marisol?” The doll seemed to be a favorite of Lela’s when they met.
Still looking down, Lela shrugged. “I didn’t feel like playing with her.”
Honor couldn’t stand to see the little girl so unhappy. “Well, while we wait for your uncle to get back, I could teach you a few things on the guitar. How does that sound to you?” Honor asked, hoping to distract Lela, if only for a little while.
Lela’s eyes got really big. “You know how to play it?”
“I sure do, and I can teach you, too, if you want.”
“That would be so cool. How did you learn?” Lela asked, sitting up straighter and staring at Honor with curiosity.
“Well, do you remember I told you I lived with a very nice lady after my mom passed away?” At Lela’s nod, Honor said, “I considered her sort of like my second mom, and she thought I needed to learn how to play an instrument. She said it made a person’s heart lighter if they could make music in some way,” Honor said, smiling at Lela. “I chose the guitar because I loved listening to a singer named Eva Cassidy. She played the guitar and had the most beautiful voice. I wanted to be like her, so I practiced and practiced until I got pretty good.”
“Do you sound like that lady, Eva?” Lela asked.
“Oh I don’t think anyone could sing as well as her. You know, she never became famous. Only a few people ever heard of her, but every time someone hears her music, they tell other people, and those people start listening to her, and then they tell other people. Isn’t that amazing that all these people listen to her music, but she was never on TV, the radio or even the internet until after she died?”
“Wow, can you play me one of her songs?” Lela asked.
Honor pretended to look unsure and said, “Well since it’s just the two of us I guess I can.” Gently taking the guitar from Lela, Honor strummed it and found it tuned perfectly. “Do you know ‘Over the Rainbow’ from the Wizard of Oz?” Honor asked.
Nodding eagerly, Lela said, “I love that movie.”
“Good, I do too,” Honor said and starting playing the opening cords and singing to Lela. This song was one of the first songs Honor had ever learned after becoming proficient on the guitar. She would play it over and over to sooth herself after a particularly bad day. The words were so hopeful for a child who felt hopeless most of the time.
Honor smiled as she watched Lela lay back on the bench and raised her hands up and down with the ebb and flow of music. She was such a sweet-natured child. Honor was glad she could make her feel good for a little while. As the last strains of the music faded there was a moment of silence, and then an explosion of applause and whistles came from behind Honor and Lela.
Honor started and looked at Lela who was grinning mischievously. Slowing turning, Honor saw what looked like a sea of people, including Risa, Sam, Mik and Conner, smiling and clapping in appreciation. Looking back at Lela, Honor put the guitar aside and squinted at her mock suspicion, “You knew they were all standing behind us the whole time didn’t you?”
Giggling Lela said, “Yes,” And then put her hands over her mouth trying to hide her grin.
Honor grabbed Lela and set her in her lap and starting tickling her. “You little ragamuffin . . .” Honor said playfully making the little girl laugh with glee. God, it felt so good to be here. It felt so normal. It felt like everything she had always craved.
Suddenly, Lela’s eyes grew round with surprise and happiness. “Uncle Gabriel!” she said, and leaped off Honors lap and into the arms of her Uncle. She put her face into his neck and held on to him tight.
Gabriel hugged her back and spoke to her soothingly, but his eyes met and held Honor’s.
Honor couldn’t look away until Risa grabbed her arm. “Wow, I didn’t know you could sing like that. You’re really good. I’m going to have to hire you for all my parties,” Risa teased.
Honor shrugged, but smiled. “I wasn’t expecting the population of China for an audience,” Honor said quietly looking at all the people wandering all over the place in awe. “Wow, you weren’t kidding before were you? You mean all of these people are Sam’s family? No wonder you were freaking out earlier,” Honor said. The crowd was a little overwhelming.
Risa shook her head. “They are all really great. It took me a while but now I enjoy these get-togethers. They make me feel a sense of family that I’ve missed since I lost my mom. Sam’s entire family has been so great to me and my dad. They just bombard you with so much love and acceptance that it’s hard to feel anything but great about it,” Risa said. “She isn’t here today, but I can’t wait for you to meet Samson’s grandmother, Selena. She is so amazing,” Risa said, her love for the older woman clearly evident.
Honor smiled with a raised eyebrow. “I can’t wait for her to get a load of me.”
Risa just smiled knowingly. “She’ll love you. Anyway, I am just about to start screaming. Want to help me wade through to the kitchen and help us get everything set up?”
“Lead the way, I’m right behind you.” Honor said. She could still feel Gabriel nearby and needed to get away from the pull he had on her senses. Her emotions weren’t under her control any longer. Cracks in her armor were growing larger and she wasn’t sure she could stop them.
Two hours later everyone had eaten and lazed around a bit before heading down to the lake. Honor watched with humor as Sam, Mik and Conner got into a mock fight on the deck’s platform and all of them ended up in the water. Risa jumped into Sam’s arms, wild hair and all, and they both got on a giant air mattress and paddled around the lake.
Honor didn’t try to brave the dock since the kids were all taking turns jumping and diving off, one after the other. Instead, she got a large beach towel from a huge stack on the deck and spread it out on the bank of the lake. She took off her Capri’s and top until her chocolate brown bikini was all that covered her body. She made her way down the bank of the lake and entered the cool water. It was heaven, just the right temperature, cool enough to be refreshing without being too chilly. She swam for a while and then was trying to decide whether to take a break when Gabriel spoke behind her in the water.
“You have a beautiful singing voice. Thanks for being so kind to Lela. Risa said she’s really taken with you,” Gabriel said quietly, but his gaze was serious and intense.
Honor swung around and she was angry at herself when her insides clenched in awareness at his nearness. “What did you expect, Gabriel, that I would treat her badly just because she’s your niece?” Honor asked mockingly and started to turn away when Gabriel caught her arm.
“I didn’t mean it that way, Honor. I . . . we need to talk,” Gabriel said.
“Oh, I don’t think so. I think you’ve said more than enough for me,” Honor said and yanked her arm away from him and left the water. She dropped down onto her towel and stared somberly out at Gabriel who had remained in the water. The promise in his eyes was unmistakable and Honor quivered in response. Why does he have to be so freaking good looking? Honor thought and dropped back and lay on the towel, allowing the sun to dry her off.
Painfully aroused, Gabriel remembered watching as Honor had undressed by the lake, until all she had on was her bikini. Her body was like every boy’s female warrior fantasy. Her long arms and legs were well toned with long, defined and fluid muscles. Gabriel had taken in Honor’s lusciously full breasts that stood high and proud on her chest, and his eyes had dropped to her flat, tight abdomen. Her curvy hips flared gently into a firm roun
ded ass that just beg to be held in a man’s grasp, his grasp. God I’m like a kid with his first Playboy. Gabriel thought in disgust.
His emotions conflicted, he watched as she stretched out on her towel. He had so many questions, but watching her sing to his niece had made his heart swell. At the same time he was suspicious about her presence in their lives. It was sheer torture and he had to find out the truth soon. His control was growing thin.
“You know if you stare at her any harder, she’ll catch fire,” Conner said mockingly as he floated next to Gabriel on one of the large black inner- tubes.
“Fuck you, Conner,” Gabriel said. He turned and watched his long-time friend grin at him knowingly.
“Have you talked to her yet? About what you found out, I mean.”
Shaking his head, Gabriel continued to watch as Honor as she lay in the sun. Despite his concerns, he still felt his body tighten with arousal.
“Well, telling her that you had her investigated isn’t going to endear you to her. You look as if you’re already in the dog house. Whatever you did to piss her off, you’d better figure out how to fix it soon,” Conner said.
“Since when did you become an expert on relationships? You barely go on a date with the same woman twice, much less have a serious relationship with any of them,” Gabriel challenged his friend.
“Can I help it if all women love me?” Conner asked innocently, but ruined it with a wicked full toothed grin.
“Not all women, brother,” Gabriel said arching a brow. “What about Ellie Lassiter? She is definitely not your biggest fan.” Gabriel laughed when Conner’s smile turned into a scowl.
“That woman’s not normal. What did I ever do to her? She treats me like a leper every time I get near her,” Conner said morosely, thinking of the tiny redheaded woman who worked at Dalton Elementary School as a second grade teacher.
Shaking his head in disbelief, Gabriel said, “Maybe it’s because you torment her every chance you get. You catch sight of her and you can’t resist getting in her face until she either tells you off or just walks away.”
Conner couldn’t help smiling devilishly. “I just can’t stand how self-righteous she is. She dresses like a house frau and scrapes her hair back in that stupid bun, and then looks at me like I’m a piece of crap on the bottom of her shoe. She called me a man-slut! Can you believe that shit? Like I said, what the hell did I ever do to her?” Conner said almost furiously, and then caught himself when he saw Gabriel’s knowing look. “Asshole,” Conner grumbled.
Gabriel said, “No problem,” and suddenly flipped Conner off the inner-tube and into the water. “I thought you could use some cooling off,” Gabriel said helpfully, but grinning evilly as he swam away from his drenched friend.
A few hours later, it was just starting to get dark as Honor made her way inside Sam and Risa’s house to say her goodbyes. She realized that she had spent the whole day without one person making any comment about her face. She hadn’t felt self-conscious or defensive all day. It was a strange feeling, one she wasn’t very familiar with. It was kind of hard to know how to feel about it.
She found Risa on the big leather sofa with Sam’s arm around her. “Hey, you guys, I had a great time but I’m going to head out.”
Risa got up and hugged Honor. “Thanks for all your help today,” Risa said meaningfully.
Surprised, Honor hugged Risa’s little body back and said, “No problem, I really enjoyed myself.” She meant it.
Biting her lip, Risa hugged Honor again and whispered, “It feels really good to have a friend. Thanks.”
“Same here,” Honor said, feeling a little choked up. Clearing her throat she asked, “I didn’t see Lela as I was coming in. Could you tell her I said good night and it was great seeing her again?”
“Yeah, no problem. When she found out some of the kids were going to have a slumber party downstairs she talked Gabriel into letting her stay one more night before picking her up in the morning,” Sam said.
“Oh, I would have thought she would have gone home with him since she missed him so much when he was out of town,” Honor said confused.
Risa shrugged acceptingly. “Now that she knows he is just a few minutes away she’s just fine, I guess.”
“Okay, well I won’t interrupt her fun. Just tell her I’ll see her later sometime,” Honor said, and left after a few more goodbyes.
As Honor drove home she thought about the day. It was the first time since she was thirteen that she felt like just one of the crowd, that there wasn’t something odd or different about her. Sam and Risa’s family and friends had embraced her company and gave her a feeling of community that had always been lacking in her life.
Gabriel had been the only part of her day that had bothered her. She was still attracted to him. She couldn’t avoid the truth any longer. Honor knew that having a relationship with Gabriel would never work. He would never look behind the mask. Honor felt a lump in her throat. It hurt, she admitted to herself. She still wanted him. She wanted the passion, the teasing, and the conversation. I want it all. He was the first man whom she ever felt she could let go and grasp what she wanted. Honor shivered with pleasure as the memories of their night together replayed in her mind. She had felt his pull all day long and wanted so badly to give in to it and seek him out.
Sighing, Honor mentally shook herself. What are you thinking? The two of you will implode on impact. Just keep your distance and everything will be okay. Honor kept chanting this chain of thought right up until she pulled up into her driveway, right next to Gabriel’s truck. Now what, you stupid inner voice, got any good affirmations for this? Honor groaned inside and tried to calm her racing heart as she saw Gabriel sitting on her porch steps waiting.
Getting out of her truck Honor said, “I have nothing to say to you Gabriel, so just leave.” Honor kept walking and started to pass him by on the porch steps until Gabriel gently caught her hand and tugged her until she stood before him. He didn’t say anything. He just pulled her closer and laid his head gently against her abdomen.
“I can’t leave until we talk, Honor. I’m hanging on by a thread here, don’t ask me to leave,” Gabriel said.
Honor closed her eyes and took a deep calming breath. She needed to tell him to leave. Instead she gripped his hand and slowly led him up to her front door and inside her home. Once inside, Honor turned to face Gabriel. “I don’t know what there is left to say between us. It’s done,” Honor said, but what she really wanted was to move into his arms.
Gabriel sat tiredly on the comfortable sofa and watched as Honor kept her distance from him by sitting in one of the side chairs. He pulled a large manila envelope from inside his jacket. “A few years back Lela was stolen away from her mother, my sister Diana, by a man my sister thought she was in love with,” Gabriel said, and stopped. After a moment of strained silence he continued. “When this man took Lela, he left my sister with his men and they raped her so viciously that she bled to death before I could get her to a hospital.”
Honor gasped and said, “Gabriel, I am so sorry. How did you find Lela?” she asked anxiously.
Gabriel blanched at the memory. “As we were taking my sister to the hospital, I held her in my arms and she told me everything she had overheard before they found out she was listening. With the information she gave me, I was able to track the man to San Francisco and stop him from sending Lela and four other little girls off to some foreign country to be sold to the highest bidder,” Gabriel said and watched as Honor froze at the mention of San Francisco and the selling of children.
“The man’s name is Maximus Dunn. He seduced my sister not long after her husband lost his life in Afghanistan during the war. She was grieving and vulnerable and Dunn took full advantage of the situation to get close to her and Lela, who was only five at the time. He promised her the moon. Home, family, security. Diana even warned me to stay out of her relationship when I questioned her about him. She made me promise not to have him investigated and threatened
not to speak to me anymore if I did. To her, he was her knight in shining armor. If I had ignored her, maybe she’d still be alive,” Gabriel said painful frustration.
Honor didn’t say anything. She was staring at Gabriel, intently waiting.
Gabriel ran an agitated hand through his hair. “It all lasted about two weeks, until I got a frantic call from my sister. She, Dunn and Lela had been out shopping when his limousine took them to a warehouse district in Charleston, North Carolina. They pulled up to this old abandoned warehouse and Dunn and the driver got out and Dunn told Diana to stay in the car with Lela, that they would be right out.”
“She didn’t stay in the car did she?” Honor asked.
Blowing out a choked breath, Gabriel said, “No, after about fifteen minutes Diana became impatient. Lela had gone to sleep on the limo seat so Diana got out and walked up to the door that she had seen Dunn go through. She overheard him telling his men to be prepared to take Lela during a trip to the park he had planned for the next day. He said he would distract Diana long enough to have his men take her and then disappear himself. Diana then overheard one of Dunn’s men talking about potential buyers for all the kids they had so far and that Lela should bring in top dollar. It was enough for Diana. She called me to say Dunn was going to try to take Lela and sell her, and then she told me where they were,” Gabriel said hoarsely.
“I was telling her to get back into the car and act like she didn’t know anything when I heard her scream and then the phone went dead. It took over an hour to reach the warehouse,” Gabriel said in a choked voice. “Conner had been able to get a helicopter up in the air in minutes, but it was too late. Dunn had taken Lela and fled, and the bastard left three of his men behind with my sister. I found them beating and raping Diana to death. I killed them all. Every man in that room with my sister is now dead,” Gabriel said stoically. “Conner called ahead to the nearest hospital and told them he was landing with a critically hemorrhaging patient.”
“Diana just lay in my arms dying and making me promise to find Lela and bring her back home to her. She told me about a warehouse in San Francisco that Dunn used for his import/export business. She said he mentioned it as a possible shipping sight for the little girls. She gave me a date and even a number for the warehouse crate. I kept telling her to hold on, but she died right before we landed,” Gabriel said and looked up to find tears streaming down Honor’s face, but not a sound came from her. She just continued to stare at him as she listened.