My stomach swirled as I glanced at the door, but Saint wouldn't be back until ten on the dot. We had plenty of time. I opened his laptop, typing in the password, biting my lip in anticipation then it dinged and we were taken to the home screen. "Yes!"
Monroe shifted closer, his shoulder pressing against mine as he took over, hungrily rifling through Saint’s files. Everything was perfectly organised unsurprisingly, but that didn't make it easier to find something useful to use against his father. If he had anything at all on here that would be helpful, it was bound to be hidden deep.
We searched his emails, finding a couple from Troy talking about colleges. He'd listed the emails of board members for various Ivy League colleges and my gut clenched as I thought of Saint heading off across the country after graduation. Blake would no doubt head off to one with a great football team and Kyan? I had no idea what Kyan would do. But his family’s claws were so deep in him, I wasn’t sure he’d ever get away from them.
"What will you do after our graduation?" I blurted at Monroe and he frowned, keeping his gaze on the screen as he continued to work through folder after folder.
"I don't know, princess. It depends..."
"On what you do about Troy?" I guessed.
"Yeah...and other things." He glanced at me from the corner of his eyes and my neck blazed with heat. "What will you do?"
"Honestly...I have no idea. I never really saw myself going to college. Maybe I'll go back to California..." My stomach knotted at the thought of leaving the Night Keepers behind, but what else was really going to happen? They might have thought we were bound forever, but that wasn't true. Things would change after this school year was over. Blake, Kyan and Saint would realise they had lives waiting for them beyond Everlake whether it was college or otherwise. We weren’t walking the same paths.
"Hm," he grunted, evidently not pleased with my words. "Maybe I'll follow you there."
I elbowed him with a laugh. "If you're not on the run by then."
"Yeah," he said, his tone serious instead of joking and that made my gut clench tightly.
"Nash..."
"I'm taking on the governor of the whole state, Tatum, it's not without risks. I can't promise this won't end badly," he said, his eyes still on the screen. "So long as I take him down in the process, I don't care what happens to me."
"Don't say that," I hissed and he turned to me at last, his eyes blazing with a pain I knew too well.
The fight went out of me because how could I ask him not to take the risk when I would have done it myself a thousand times over? I'd spilled my enemy's blood to avenge my father without a thought for the consequences. If it wasn't for Kyan, I could be rotting in a prison cell right now. We all could be. And it was clear Nash saw that as a possible outcome for whatever way this went. But the idea of him throwing away his life, of him being ripped away from me too just made me hurt.
"Just be smart about it. Have an exit plan," I pushed.
He nodded firmly. "I will. Just as soon as I have an actual way to get to him."
“You’ve been careful up until now,” I agreed. “You’ve covered your tracks coming here, you changed your name, buried your own identity…I just can’t help but worry after everything Troy already did to your family. He’s clearly vindictive and ruthless enough to do whatever it takes to silence you and I just can’t bear the idea of something happening to you like that…”
I trailed off, biting my lip and Monroe gently caught my chin and turned my gaze up to meet his.
“Did I ever tell you what my name was, once upon a time?” he asked softly, a slight frown tugging at his brow.
I shook my head slowly, looking into his deep blue eyes and feeling all the hurt of that pain and grief which lived in him there. We were the same now, me and him, both orphans who had lost our siblings too. Both lost souls cut adrift with no one who remembered the children we once were or the love our families once felt.
“It was Jase,” he said as a little smile tugged at the corner of my lips. “Jase Harrington.”
“Jase,” I murmured and he released a soft groan, leaning forward to press his forehead to mine.
“A part of me loves the sound of that name on your lips,” he breathed. “But I’m not him anymore. I feel like he was this nice, honest, hard working kid and I’m little more than a shell holding his memories tightly like grains of sand in my fist, desperately trying to keep hold of them even while they continue to slip away. The things I’ve done…the things I plan to do and am willing to do in payment for the lives of my family, they don’t belong to him. He had everything to live for. And I just have this one thing.”
“Just the one?” I asked softly, trying to ignore the twist of pain in my gut at that statement.
“That was how it was for a hell of a long time, anyway,” he replied, pulling back and using his hold on my chin to get me to look up at him again. “But now I have you. Or at least, I hope I do. And I’m starting to think I’ve got a whole lot more to live for now.”
“You do have me,” I promised him and some of the darkness in his blue eyes lightened. “And I have you too.”
His lips found mine in a soft, sweet promise of that and some of the pain in my heart seemed to loosen its grip on me as I stole a moment in his strong arms. But we didn’t have any more time available to linger and I pushed him back gently with a light laugh.
“That said, we do still wanna take down Troy Memphis, so we should really be concentrating on finding some dirt on this laptop.”
Monroe smiled hungrily, releasing me as he turned his attention back to the hunt and I couldn’t help but smile to myself at the memory of his mouth on mine and the little piece of his soul he’d just offered up to me.
We fell quiet as we hunted through the laptop and I cast looks over at the door and the clock from time to time.
My phone buzzed after a while and my heart leapt a little as I checked it, finding a message on the group chat for all five of us. I swear I’d left this chat a hundred times, but Saint always managed to get me back into it somehow.
Kyan:
Message for Tatum: I'm going to *squid emoji* your *peach emoji* when I get back later.
I snorted a laugh, shooting him a reply quickly.
Tatum:
Not if I *octopus emoji* your *peacock emoji* first.
Blake:
I have an idea for later…*eggplant emoji* x2 + *winky face emoji* + *doughnut emoji*?
Saint:
Fuck you all.
I breathed a laugh and Monroe looked over at his phone, seeing the messages flash up there too. He grabbed it, tossing out his own reply to the conversation.
Nash:
Tatum just explained this conversation to me and frankly I'm disgusted.
Saint:
Did she tell you what the squid means?
Nash:
Everyone knows what that means.
Saint:
Tell. Me.
Nash:
*Squid emoji*
Kyan:
*Octopus emoji*
Saint:
Last warning or I'm closing this chat down.
I laughed, knocking my shoulder against Monroe’s and he turned and crushed his lips to mine, fisting his hand in my hair. "I'll never miss an opportunity to rile up Saint Memphis." He smirked and I grinned, glancing at the time and figuring we probably didn't have long enough for a quickie considering we'd gotten nowhere with the laptop so far. And we only had fifteen minutes before Saint would be back. Dammit.
Monroe clicked through folder after folder, finding nothing of interest. At five to ten, my stomach started to knot and I stood from my seat in exasperation. "We’d better leave it, Nash. There's nothing here."
"Just wait a second," he growled with urgency to his tone as he clicked on another folder marked MAF.
I glanced at the clock nervously as he clicked on the first file and he inhaled long and slow. "Well, look at that..."
"What is it?" I
leaned down to see, my pulse hammering in my ears.
"It's a copy of Troy Memphis’s bank statement. And it looks like there's more of them." He clicked on another file then another. "Some of the transactions are highlighted." He pointed one out and I frowned at the large sums of money.
"Did Saint highlight these?" I questioned and Monroe shrugged. “What are they for?”
A key twisted in the front door lock and I nearly leapt out of my skin. Monroe dove to his feet, closing down the folder and shutting the laptop firmly before racing across the room to throw himself on the couch.
I walked purposefully towards the kitchenette, not looking back as Saint entered and hoping I looked casual as I opened the fridge and took out the water filter. As I shut the fridge, I glanced over at Saint, finding him standing by his laptop, staring down at it, his entire body rigid. Oh shit.
My heart thrashed against my ribcage as I poured myself a glass of water and tried not to freak the fuck out. Is he smelling our lasting scent near the damn thing like a freaking vampire??
I sipped my water and his eyes flicked to me, full of a dark and writhing suspicion. "Go home, Monroe," he commanded in a deadly calm voice and I swear my spine turned to a pillar of ice.
Monroe’s head popped up from the couch, yawning like he'd just been taking a nap and he looked pretty damn convincing to me. I just hoped Saint bought it. "Thought I might crash here tonight."
"The answer is no. Leave," Saint hissed and Monroe tossed me a look, clearly not wanting to leave me alone with him. But better he got out of here and wasn't accused of anything. Because if Saint figured out Monroe was targeting him, I didn't know what kind of terrifying hell he'd rain down on him.
"Goodnight, Nash," I said to Monroe, trying to keep my voice light and when Saint gave the laptop another hard look, I shot Monroe an expression that encouraged him to get out.
“I’ll sleep easier without a phantom breathing down my neck anyway.” Monroe gave Saint a pointed look before backing up to the door and making a pretend phone with his thumb and little finger, holding it to his ear as he implored me with his eyes to call him if I needed him. I gave him a small nod and he stepped out the door, the tension in the air humming against my ears as he left me with Saint. He said nothing, his muscles still tight and his teeth grinding.
"I think I'll take a shower," I said airily, taking a step forward, but before I could go anywhere, Saint grabbed the chair in front of his laptop, ripped it off the floor and threw it at the wall. It smashed into three pieces with a heart-shuddering crack and I recoiled in alarm as he bared his teeth at me.
"Do you think I'm a fucking fool?!" he bellowed and fear consumed me. I'd never seen Saint angry like this. There was a deep betrayal in his eyes as he pointed at me then to the laptop. "Do you want to explain to me why my laptop has moved an inch to the left of where I put it?"
I stepped closer to him, knowing it was a dangerous move, but I needed to try and convince him of the lie I was about to tell. And if I ran away, I'd only prove my guilt. "Maybe I knocked it?" I said innocently. "I did some school work right beside it, maybe I-"
"Don't lie to me!" he roared, striding forward and I gasped as he got right in my face. I could taste his breath, could feel the burning, twisting inhuman creature inside him that he battled with every day. But I could feel more than that. Could see more in his eyes. It was the depth of this betrayal that he feared. That if I had touched his precious laptop, tried to get into it, then I wasn't trustworthy. The girl who he let sleep in his bed, who was so deep into his inner circle that she now had the power to unravel him.
"Don't shout at me," I bit back at him, his tone making my hackles rise. Instead of leaning away, I leaned toward him, tip-toeing up so we were nose to nose.
"What are you after?" he demanded, his voice dropping to a deadly hiss worthy of a viper. "You want my secrets, Tatum? Because you couldn't handle them. You'd cower in the face of my demons."
"I don't cower for anyone or anything," I snarled. "You should know that by now."
"Maybe I don't know you at all," he snapped, his eyes flashing with red hot anger. "Maybe I let a rat into my home and I need to crush its spine beneath my heel."
I slapped him, my fury bubbling over. How dare he speak to me like that?
He snarled furiously, grabbing my arms, wheeling me around and shoving me against the wall so my back impacted with it. My hair fell forward into my face as a breath huffed out of my lungs.
"Let go of me," I growled as he pinned me there, getting so close that my thoughts were harder to grasp. His crisp apple scent was enticing and made my anger blurry at the edges as it bled into lust. I tried to crush that desire away but it only grew sharper as he panted heavily and our breaths mixed.
"Maybe I'll put you down in the crypt and lock you up in one of those stone coffins for the night, maybe then you'll talk," he spat, his eyes a deep void of darkness.
I rested my head back against the wall as he leaned in even closer, a craziness in his gaze that made me want to keep pushing and pushing to find out what happened when he finally lost it completely.
"There's nothing to say. Why are you really angry at me, Saint?" I demanded, my heart all but stopping as he pressed his hard chest to mine and crushed me into the wall firmly enough to hurt. I felt his rock hard cock digging into my thigh and I gasped, unblinking as he glared down at me, a tortured soul staring right back into the depths of my being.
"I'm so fucking sick of you tormenting me," he snapped, rage spewing from him as his voice rose once again.
"You're not sick of it. You lap it up," I shot back at him, my features twisting. "You're always staring, always watching me with the others. Why don't you man up and own your feelings for once?"
He smacked his hand into the wall beside my head with a thump, making me flinch full bodily and a yelp of alarm escape me.
"As if I'd strike you anywhere but your peachy little ass," he laughed coldly and I shoved him, hating him, hating wanting him, hating caring for him. “And you can’t get enough of it.”
"You’re the one who can’t get enough. You spank me when I'm bad, and drool over me when I'm good. But you can’t just own what you really want and fuck me like a man. It's pathetic," I snarled, pushing his buttons, unsure why exactly I was goading the devil, but fuck him. I was so done with this game. This back and forth, this blazing fire between us which he always tried to dismiss as nothing. "Let me past." I shoved him back a step, slipping under his arm, but he caught my hair then shoved me back against the wall again, practically snarling in my face.
"I'm done with this!" I yelled, fury eating me alive as he caged me in. "You're just a cruel, heartless monster of a man and I'm done being your play thi-" His mouth landed on mine and suddenly he was kissing me ferociously, passionately, his tongue sinking between my lips, cool and furious against mine as he groaned headily.
I gasped as he caught my hips, lifting me up and driving me back against the wall once more as he consumed me. That was the only word for it. Saint Memphis was kissing me with the hunger of a warrior invading a kingdom. He was conquering each piece of my mouth and claiming me in a wholly new way. I had never been kissed like this. It was rich and intoxicating and almost blasphemous. It was entirely Saint.
He started tearing at my clothes and I moaned in encouragement, pulling at his shirt and dragging it over his head. As he ripped my cami off and his flesh pressed to mine, I gasped at the hardened kiss of his muscles against my soft curves. He yanked up my skirt, breathless and desperate for me as he pushed my panties aside and found me wet and wanting. Just for him. All for him. He groaned, feeling what he did to me and sighing my name.
He kissed me again, harder this time, biting at my lower lip with a growl as he unbuckled his pants. He freed his hard length, looking ready to blow already as he squeezed the base in his fist. He forced me against the wall with one arm, the same one he'd broken, showing no sign of pain except the same, absolute agony I was feeling of o
ur bodies not yet being joined yet. I couldn't wait a second longer. I was clawing at him, reduced to nothing but a sweaty, needy animal as he guided the tip of his twitching cock to my soaking entrance and I took in a breath as I readied for him to brand me as his at long last.
Saint met my gaze, his eyes full of the deepest, blackest shadow I'd ever seen. His lips were parted, his breaths were coming unevenly and there was nothing but chaos in his expression. He'd let himself go and he was about to show me what it was like to be at the mercy of Saint Memphis when he completely lost control.
He released a noise of anguish as he ground against me and he slid the head of his dick against my entrance, making me gasp and claw at him for more. The atmosphere suddenly crackled and he jerked away from me, dropping me so I fell on my ass and I yelped in surprise.
“Fuck!” he roared, twisting away from me, yanking his pants up and throwing the whole dining table over, sending his laptop clattering over the flagstones.
"Saint!” I yelled, pushing to my feet and reaching for him, my hands actually shaking. What the hell was he thinking?
He jammed his fingers into his eyes, backing up further and further. "I can't do this. The rules. The fucking rules!"
"Screw the rules!" I cried wildly, marching towards the fridge as my skirt fell back down over my thighs. "I'll strike them off. Who gives a damn?"
"No!" He raced past me, snatching them from the fridge and clutching them to his chest. His eyes were a fortress designed to keep me out and he was building it higher and higher and higher. "I give a damn. You can't pick and choose what goes and what doesn't depending on your mood. That's not how the world works, Tatum," he snapped, his anger at me returning.
I stared at him in shock as he strode past me, marching upstairs and walking straight into his bathroom. He slammed the door and my heart lurched at the sound as it echoed up to the cavernous roof then the crash of more shit breaking filled the air.
Kings of Anarchy Page 23