I knew exactly what he meant. I’d probably romanticized my marriage a great deal in the years since Cody’s death. Perhaps I remembered things differently, but given the circumstances, that was understandable. I’d loved Cody, and he’d been taken from me without warning, just when our children were nearly grown and our future together seemed bright. The ranch was a thriving concern, Dad had been in better health, and aside from the day-to-day details, there had been no worries. Not like there were now.
“I’m dreaming about the good old days?” I suggested, arching a brow. “Is that it?”
“Something like that,” he replied. “But don’t underestimate the future, Angel. It might even be better.”
“You’re right.” I was so tired, the stuffing seemed to drain out of me as I took a seat at the table. “What about you? Are you having second thoughts?”
“I’d be lying if I said I didn’t,” he replied. “No one can ever be completely certain about anything. One day you’re riding high and the next you’re flat on your face with a mouthful of dirt. But right now, with the way I feel about you, I believe it’s worth the risk. My heart’s been broken before, and I’ve been kinda shy about giving it to someone again.
“Maybe that’s why I fell in love with you. You were married and unavailable. I could love you as much as I wanted and never get hurt. But it did hurt. When you’d smile at me I’d feel better for a while, but then I’d be miserable because I knew a smile was all I’d ever get from you. And now, well…now I can have it all. It might be kinda scary, but I’m willing to take the risk because you’re worth it—worth risking my heart and soul for. I love you so much I can hardly stand it.”
“I love you too.” I smiled, glancing down at his bowl. “So why don’t you, um, hurry up and eat that so we can go to bed?”
He made a face but dug his spoon into the bowl anyway. “I know what it is,” he said with a sage nod. “You only love me for my body. Right?”
“You betcha—although there are plenty of other things I love about you.”
“Such as?”
I didn’t have to think very long before making my reply. “The way you make me laugh is one, along with that impish expression when you’re teasing the hell out of Bull. The way you don’t panic in the face of disaster. You can be stuck in a truck with a rattlesnake under your foot and you still don’t lose your sense of humor. The way you allow yourself to be vulnerable—letting your heart go, even though it might cost you dearly. Finally admitting how you felt about me, even knowing it might not be worth the risk. I like that. The courage it took for you to say something at last was remarkable, and it made what you feel for me seem that much stronger.”
I reached across the table and gave his hand a squeeze.
“I love the way you make me feel when I touch you, the way you’re not afraid to let me look at you, the freedom you give me to say whatever I wish. The way you don’t fuss at me for giggling all the time like some men might. The way your body responds to me. I like knowing I can reach for you anytime and you’re already anticipating it, already craving it. I like the way you want me the way I am—not younger, prettier, or thinner. You told me I was beautiful. You make me feel that way, and you make me feel loved.” I smiled at him again. “Is that enough, or should I keep going?”
I’d already stopped him in mid-bite a couple of times. At that rate, he was never going to finish that chili.
“Keep going,” he replied. “I’m not done eating yet.”
I laughed. “Dusty, if I keep going, I’ll have to resort to describing the various parts of you and why I like them. You wanted to know other things, didn’t you?”
“Yeah. Keep going.” He took another bite.
“Okay. You’re honest, hardworking, trustworthy, and loyal. You have the cutest smile I’ve ever seen. I love your curly hair, the curve of your shoulder, the line of your hip in a pair of jeans—and out of them. I love the way you wanted me to smell you. Did you know I’ve been sniffing at you for years? I could never understand why you wore cologne. It seemed unnecessary, but I liked it. I used to walk behind you just so I could catch a whiff.”
The smile he gave me said it all. “I wear it for you, Angel. Only you.”
I nearly choked on the lump in my throat, needing a moment to recover before I went on. “Do you remember when we delivered that foal together last year? Afterward, I was standing beside you, leaning over the stall door. The foal was adorable, but you were even more so. You were so close I could smell you and feel your heat. All I wanted was for you to put your arm around me and give me a hug. But you didn’t. I figured it was because I was too old or not attractive enough or something.”
He swallowed another mouthful of chili, somehow making that simple act seem overwhelmingly erotic. “I remember that night, and believe me, I wasn’t thinking about how old you were—or that you weren’t pretty enough to suit me. I hate to sound indelicate or unromantic, but you nearly got nailed. It took every ounce of self-control I had not to rip your jeans off and take you right there—whether you liked it or not.”
His big blue eyes were riveted on my own, scorching me with their heat. Quite suddenly, those jeans he’d spoken of needed to come off—badly. They were too hot, too confining. My nipples threatened to wear holes in the cups of my bra. I wanted—needed—his hands on me, and I longed to caress every inch of him with my entire body. He took another mouthful, sliding his tongue across the underside of the spoon, an act that stole my breath and made me squirm in my chair.
“What’s the matter?” A sensuous gleam shone in his half-closed eyes. “Getting hot?”
“No,” I gasped. “Hungry.”
He held out the spoon. “Want some of this?”
I shook my head. “I want some of that.” I pointed at the bulge in his groin, noting that the button-fly of his jeans was being tested to the limit.
A slow, devilish grin curled his lips. “Help yourself. It’s yours for the taking.” He leaned back against the chair, stretching out his legs.
I’d partially undressed him once before, but with his leg in a cast, I wasn’t sure how to go about getting those jeans off him—at least not with any speed. Not that I needed to remove them completely…
Kneeling between his knees, I popped open the top button and nearly swallowed my tongue when I realized he wasn’t wearing briefs.
“You okay, Angel?”
“I’m fine—I think. You, um, be sure to finish your milk. We need to get this leg healed.”
“Don’t worry, I will,” he purred. “What are you going to have?”
“Not sure,” I replied as the second button went. “But there seems to be something wet in here.”
He shifted his butt in the seat. “I dunno. Feels more like a rock—and you know you can’t get water out of a stone, don’t you?” His slow, teasing drawl was certainly making me wet. My mouth was a different story.
“You just watch me,” I told him. “I’ll bet I can do it.”
The third button followed the previous two, and I got my first glimpse of the soft, blond curls those pants had been hiding. He was carrying his cock up against his belly, but off to one side, and I pushed back the flap to reveal it in all its hard, succulent glory. Where it lay against his stomach, the hair was wet and sticking to his skin.
Leaning forward, I nudged his penis aside with my cheek to lick the damp slickness from him. “See? All the water I need.”
“Okay,” he admitted. “You really can squeeze water out of a stone. But would you like something extra to go along with that? Something sweet and warm and creamy?”
If I hadn’t known better, I’d have called my reply an orgasm. Sure felt like one. Either way, it took me a moment to recover my wits.
“I dunno,” I said with a slow wag of my head. “If you really think you can come through a cock that tight, you go right ahead and try
it. But I bet you can’t.”
“Watch me,” he said. “You suck hard enough, and I’ll fill you right up.”
I sat back on my heels, scratching my head in a mock bewilderment. “Correct me if I’m wrong, but as I recall, I was supposed to take you home and suck your balls, not your dick.”
Dusty’s gut-wrenching groan made me smile. Two could play this game…
“Ooh, hard choice. But I’ve been a good boy. I ate all of my supper and drank all my milk. Can’t I have both? Huh, Angel? Pretty please?” His pleading expression could’ve seduced a nun.
Chewing my thumbnail, I let out a resigned sigh. “I suppose I could—although I can’t even see your balls yet.” I popped open the two remaining buttons. “Now, where are those little devils?”
Wiggling his butt, he thrust his hips forward, making his cock sway back and forth. “They’re in there, waiting for you—but they’re getting kind of impatient.”
“Poor babies,” I said. “Don’t worry, your Angel will find them and make them feel so much better.”
I found them, all right, but I didn’t use my hands or my fingers in the search. Kissing the uppermost part of his scrotum, I sucked in, creating enough of a vacuum to hold on as I pulled, and out they came. If his openmouthed reaction was any indication, no one had ever sucked Dusty’s balls out of his jeans before. Come to think of it, I couldn’t recall having ever done it myself.
Still, if anyone had ever deserved to win a “Cutest Balls” award, it was Dusty. Smooth and firm within his soft, furry scrotum, they were truly worthy of being called the family jewels. Leaning closer, I licked lightly around the outer edge, his cock pulsing against the side of my face anytime I inhaled as if about to give in to temptation and suck them. I went on teasing him, drawing back from time to time, simply admiring the way his cock and balls were framed by those dark blue denim jeans…
Whoa, momma…
After a bit, I got up to retrieve a dish from the table.
“What’s that?” he gasped.
“Shh… You’ll see,” I promised. “But not yet.”
I picked up where I’d left off, licking, teasing, and gradually wetting his entire scrotum with a combination of my saliva and his cock syrup.
“Angel, I’m gonna come if you don’t stop.”
Opening my mouth as wide as I could, I placed it against his balls and inhaled. Both of his nuts popped into my mouth.
Dusty let out an “ahhh-h-h-h…” the memory of which I would undoubtedly cherish until my dying day. Running my tongue over the underside of his scrotum, I continued to tease his balls while gently sucking them away from his body.
When I reached up to cup his cockhead in my hand, he shuddered, sending more juice gushing onto my palm. Grasping his cock, I slid my fingers over his skin. His own lubrication was almost enough, but not quite, and I wanted this to be good—not the slightest bit uncomfortable for him. Moving by feel alone, I took the lid off the dish and scooped up a dollop of soft butter and slathered it all over his cock.
Glancing up, I saw the same expression of awe mingled with ecstasy I’d seen on his face that day in the bunkhouse. I wanted to be able to see that at least twice a day for the rest of my life.
“Oh God,” he gasped. “You’re really gonna do it, aren’t you? Right here in the kitchen?”
I couldn’t reply—couldn’t even nod without hurting him—so I gave him a quick thumbs-up with my buttery right hand. Wrapping my fingers around his cock, I slid them lovingly up and down his quivering shaft. As I leaned into him, inhaling his masculine scent, my core contracted, sending the moisture that had been building up inside me out with a whoosh—along with another mini-orgasm. I had to stifle a chuckle. There I was trying to get him off, and I’d already flown off into space twice before he ever left the launchpad.
Not that it would take much longer. His breath came in quick, hard gasps as I fucked him relentlessly with my hand.
“Angel,” he cried out suddenly. “I’m—” He stopped as his words were replaced with inarticulate grunts as his nuts spasmed inside my mouth. Releasing his balls, I rose from the floor, going for his hot, buttered dick just as it let loose like a geyser. The first spurt hit me on the chin, but I was able to suck him into my mouth in time to get a mouthful of butter-flavored semen. I allowed him a few seconds of recovery time before licking him clean.
When I finished, I stood and reached for a napkin to wipe the butter from my face and hands.
Dusty closed his eyes and sighed. “Troy wasn’t kidding, was he?”
“About what?”
“He said I hadn’t lived until you’d sucked my balls.” He gazed up at me with a mixture of adoration and gratitude. “He was right.”
I smiled. “I’m glad you agree.” I glanced at the clock. “Two o’clock is way past my bedtime. Are you ready for bed now?”
“I-I think so,” he replied, a dazed expression in his eyes. “Let’s see now… My stomach’s full and my dick’s empty. Is there anything else I should do?”
“You might want to pee and brush your teeth. Aside from that, it sounds like you’re good to go.”
He frowned. “Don’t you want me to, um, do you?”
As befuddled as he seemed, I wasn’t sure he was up to it. “Think you can?”
His eyes widened. “Are you kidding me?” Apparently my taunt had cleared his head better than a whiff of ammonia. “Might need someplace to lie down, though. Not sure I can nail you on the kitchen table. Not tonight, anyway.”
“I know just the place.” I shot him a wink. “Follow me.”
Chapter 26
Getting into bed with Dusty was like a dream come true at the end of a very long and extremely eventful day.
Granted, I was tired, but just as my taunt had revived him, the sight of him on my bed had a similar effect on me. He’d been irresistibly sexy lying on the bunk in the tack room, but he seemed to belong here in my room. Like I’d spent every night of my adult life in bed with him.
I hadn’t of course, nor was I replacing Cody. I was simply moving on. Cody would understand, just as I would have understood his need to find love with another woman if I’d been the one to die.
Pushing those morbid thoughts aside, I slid into Dusty’s embrace, pressing kisses to his lips as I sifted my fingers through his hair. Oh yes, I was dreaming. Dreaming of the days and nights ahead with this wonderful man. There would be problems to unravel and other obstacles on the road ahead of us, but together, we could solve anything. I was sure of that now. Nothing could stand in our way.
Well…maybe two things did. Dusty’s accidents for one. Would they cease when I openly acknowledged him as the man I loved? I wasn’t sure. Somehow, I thought they might, but as determined as those efforts had been—if indeed they were intentional—I couldn’t be sure.
The other problem was that same old nagging suspicion that someday Dusty would decide he wanted children and trade me in for a younger, more fertile woman. This was one fear I could confront, and I needed to do it now, before our relationship went any further.
“Comfy?” I asked.
“Very,” he replied. “I could get used to this.”
“I hope you do.” I sucked in a breath and held it for a second. It was now or never. “You know I—well, there’s something we haven’t talked about. I’m not sure how to say it other than to just come out with it. If you think you’re gonna want kids someday, you might want to rethink being with me. Aside from the fact that I’m probably too old to be having babies, I had a tubal after Chris was born. There won’t ever be any little Dustys running around the ranch. Are you okay with that?”
He was silent for a long moment. “I gave up on that idea a long time ago,” he finally said. “I pretty much had to.”
I could understand him giving up on the idea simply from knowing my age, but he couldn’t possibly
have known I’d been fixed unless Cody or Troy had told him, which I very much doubted. “What do you mean?”
“You know those balls you think are so damned cute?” He plunged on ahead without waiting for my reply. “They don’t work. I had the mumps when I was sixteen.” He winced at the memory. “Went straight to my nuts, and you want to talk about something painful. I thought I was gonna die. Anyway, I wound up sterile, but at least I’m not impotent.”
My jaw dropped. “Damn. Wish I’d known that. I mean, I’m real sorry that happened to you and all, but I’ve been beating myself up over not being good enough for you because I couldn’t have your children. If I’d known I wasn’t the only one in this duo incapable of reproducing, I wouldn’t have been quite so hesitant.”
Dusty stared at me with surprise. “I would’ve thought the fact that I’d never bothered to use a condom might have been a good clue.”
I snorted a laugh. “True, but I’ve been feeling this way since way before the use of a condom became an issue. And even when it was, I didn’t give it much thought. I’d already told Troy he didn’t need to worry—although looking back, I probably shouldn’t have trusted him to be free of disease. Guess I should’ve been more careful. Either way, the need for birth control was the farthest thing from my mind that first time with you in the bunkhouse. If I’d thought about it at all, I might’ve assumed you knew something from talking to Troy or Cody—although I can’t imagine why either of them would’ve mentioned it.”
“They didn’t. But, like I said, I knew it didn’t matter.” He caressed my cheek with a fingertip. “And it wouldn’t have mattered even if I wasn’t shooting blanks. I love you, Angel.”
Bone-melting kisses followed, preventing me from professing my love in return.
Not that any declarations were necessary. Dusty knew how I felt. I didn’t need to tell him. Not with words, anyway.
Cowboy Heaven Page 23