She knew how he felt already. She’d heard him talking to Garrett, hadn’t she? She wasn’t permanent. He felt sorry for Connor.
Oh, God. Connor. Losing Griffin was going to be so confusing for him. He wouldn’t understand that Griffin had only been in his life temporarily. That he’d been the object of pity. Her heart hurt for Connor, and she wondered if she shouldn’t just pull back from Griffin now. Do what she could to make this easier on her son, if not on her. But would hurrying his hurt make it easier to understand? And how could she leave now anyway? Her house was still not ready, and she couldn’t afford to go anywhere else.
She was going to have to try to protect Connor the best she could while, at the same time, dying a little inside.
Shaking her head, Nicole concentrated on the papers in front of her and completely ignored Griffin’s attempt at trying to soothe her. “Okay, then, first, we figure out how many men you’ll need to work the job.”
“We also have to factor in the laser alarm system, the cameras and computer equipment,” Griffin was saying, his voice crisp and cool, businesslike, as if he’d accepted that she wasn’t interested in anything more at the moment. “We’ll cooperate with the museum’s standing security, but I’ll want King equipment to bolster it.”
She looked up at him and thought again that this had become more than just an affair. This was the first time she’d ever talked numbers with a man without watching his eyes glaze over. A part of her warmed to the idea that they were working together. If things were different, they could have had a future where he came to her for help with his business. They could have, over time, developed trust and cooperation and maybe even—
His cell phone rang. Griffin glanced at the readout, and almost instantly his open features closed up tight. His eyes shut her out and he stood up as he answered.
“Brittany, hi.”
Brittany. Griffin’s voice dropped to the husky, intimate tone she knew so well and Nicole cringed a little. Oh, dear God, was she interchangeable with the other women in his life? Did he use that sexy voice on all of them? And did every woman finally imagine herself in love with him?
Probably, she acknowledged, and didn’t know whether that made her feel better or worse.
“It’s good to hear from you,” Griffin was saying as he walked a few steps across the kitchen. “Yeah, I meant to call you, but well, work’s been busy.”
Huh. He was on vacation. She guessed that was his standard line, used to put off women who got too clingy. So if she called him a few weeks from now, it would be her getting the brush-off, not poor Brittany. God, this was so embarrassing.
“Actually,” Griffin said, “I’m with my accountant right now, so it’s not a good time to...”
His accountant? Whatever else he said was lost on Nicole. That’s what she was. Some nameless grunt helping him out with a little math. If she could have, she would have found the nearest hole and crawled into it.
All of her lovely little fantasies popped like soap bubbles in her mind. Pain opened up inside her and Nicole had to force a sudden film of tears from her eyes. Here it was, she told herself. Proof that she’d made the second biggest mistake of her life.
She’d fallen for a man too much like her ex. Oh, Griffin was a better man than Connor’s father, but at the heart of it, he was no different. He wasn’t interested in commitment, and if she was dumb enough to let him know that she cared about him, she’d see pity in his eyes. That was one thing she never wanted to go through.
So she’d keep her feelings to herself. She’d go along with their affair until it was over and then she’d curl up with a gallon of ice cream and a couple bottles of wine. Until then...
“Sorry about that,” Griffin said, sitting down beside her. “Brittany’s an old friend and—”
“You don’t owe me an explanation, Griffin. I’m just the accountant.” She winced as she said it and would have slapped her own hand across her mouth if it would have called the words back. But she so didn’t want to hear him try to explain away one of his old girlfriends.
“Hey,” he said, catching her chin and turning her face toward him. “I didn’t mean—”
She pulled free, though it cost her, because she loved the feel of his hands on her. But best to get used to doing without, wasn’t it? “Doesn’t matter. Really. Let’s just finish up this proposal.”
“Right.” He watched her carefully, then said, “The proposal.”
Nicole shifted her gaze to the list in front of her and pushed her thoughts into linear compliance. Focus on the math, she told herself. Forget about fantasy. Forget about what ifs. Take what you have and make the most of it before it’s gone.
The hardest thing to admit?
She was pretty sure it was already gone.
* * *
The next afternoon, the kitchen phone rang, and Nicole picked it up on the run. Connor was in the backyard and she didn’t want to leave him alone for long.
“Hello?”
There was a long pause and then a familiar voice asked, “Nicole?”
She grinned. “Katie, hi. How’s the vacation going?”
“Amazing,” her best friend said, and Nicole heard the smile in her voice. “Seriously, I love Europe. We stopped in Ireland to see Jefferson and Maura and the kids, then spent a few days in Edinburgh to visit Damian and see his new club.”
“Oh, you told me it has a ghost theme. Was it great?”
“Very. And a little scary,” Katie admitted. “I think it’s actually haunted.”
A twinge of envy filled Nicole at the wonderful things her friend was seeing, experiencing. One day, she promised herself, she, too, would see the world.
“Okay, that actually sounds like fun.”
Katie laughed. “You’re braver than me, then. Anyway, after we left Damian’s we spent a few days in London and, oh, my God, Nicole, it’s just...”
Nicole sighed. “I can hear it in your voice.”
Still laughing, her friend said, “Good, because I don’t think I can describe it. Anyway, after that, we went to Switzerland and now we’re in Italy and I think I’m in love with this place. The food alone is orgasmic.”
“I’m so jealous,” Nicole said.
“I’m jealous of you.” Katie sighed. “You’re in Long Beach. As great as this trip’s been, I’m so ready to come home. Is that weird?”
“No,” Nicole said, moving to the window so she could keep an eye on Connor while she talked. She so understood Katie’s feelings.
This interlude with Griffin had been wonderful. Actually too wonderful, she admitted silently. As Katie said, it had been orgasmic. Yet as much as she hated it, she knew that going home would be best. Leaving Griffin and this idyllic time behind her. Get back to normal—though normal would be different now, too. Because after this time with Griffin, her house would feel emptier than it had. Lonelier than it had.
She sighed a little, and Katie must have heard it.
“Nicole,” she asked, “is something wrong?”
“No,” she answered quickly. Too quickly, it seemed.
“Okay, I don’t believe you.”
“Why not?”
“For one thing, you’re at my house instead of yours. What happened?” Katie’s voice dropped into a serious tone that brooked no argument. “Did Griffin do something? Do I have to kill him?”
So much for secrets. Nicole glanced out the window at Connor, digging happily in the flowerbeds. No matter what else happened in her life, Nicole thought, she had her son. That would get her through anything.
“No,” she said finally, “you don’t have to kill Griffin.”
“Oh, God,” Katie groaned. “You slept with him, didn’t you?”
Shaking her head, Nicole took the phone from her ear and stared at it in wonder. It was like h
er friend had X-ray vision or something. “How can you tell that through the phone?”
“Easy. I know the King men.” Clearly disgusted, Katie muttered, “I told him to stay away from you. Heck, I told all of them to stay away from you.”
“Yeah, so Griffin told me. Thanks for that, by the way. What am I, twelve?”
“No,” Katie said quickly, “but you’re vulnerable and they’re all so...”
“Oh, they really are.”
“Damn it.”
“It’s not his fault anyway, Katie. Griffin was staying away,” Nicole told her with a sigh. “I went after him.”
“Oh.” Katie was quiet for a minute. Then, “I don’t know what to say, I guess. But, Nicole...”
“Look, something happened at my house and I couldn’t stay there and—”
“What happened?”
“Griffin accidentally started a fire in my kitchen and I didn’t have a place to stay, so Griffin offered to let us move in here while Lucas and his crew fixed my kitchen and...” She was talking too fast and couldn’t seem to stop herself.
“A fire?”
“A small one.”
“Oh,” she said with a laugh, “well, then.”
Nicole blew out a breath. “The point is, my house is almost fixed and I’ll be moving home soon...” Did she sound as depressed about that as she felt?
“And what about you and Griffin?” Katie asked. “You’re telling me you can just walk away without a second thought?”
“I am,” she said, and wished she meant it.
“Sweetie, that’s just not who you are. But sorry to say, it is who Griffin is. Nicole, you have to know what he’s like. He’s commitment-phobic. Seriously. I mean, Rafe was a challenge, but Griffin is impossible. Being single is like a religion to him.”
“Yeah, I know,” Nicole told her, leaning on the kitchen counter. With her free hand, she brushed at a few toast crumbs she had missed after Connor’s lunch. “Katie, I’m not looking for a husband, remember? And if I was, I wouldn’t be looking at Griffin.”
My God, could your tongue actually fall off from an overload of lies?
“Oh, honey,” Katie said on a half groan. “You’re in love with him, aren’t you?”
Irritation spiked. “How did you get that out of what I said?”
“I notice you’re not denying it.”
She should. She really should. Otherwise, here came the sympathy train, which she wanted to avoid. But Katie was her best friend, and Nicole couldn’t lie to her over the long haul. And let’s face it, once Katie got home and found Nicole miserable, she’d know the truth anyway, so what was the point? “Okay, I might be. Maybe. Probably.”
“Nicole...”
“Fine. Yes. I am,” she said, grinding out each word. “What’re you, a master interrogator?”
Katie laughed a little. “I don’t even know what to say to you.”
“No sympathy, okay?” Nicole interrupted before her friend could get going. “I don’t need you to feel sorry for me, really. I’m a big girl. I knew what I was doing, and I’ll be fine. Honestly.” She lifted her chin and squared her shoulders. “I was doing great on my own before and I will again.”
“Of course you will.”
“Thank you,” she said, glad to have her friend’s support.
“But I’m still going to have Rafe beat him up.”
Nicole laughed and shook her head as if Katie could see her. “No, you’re not. You’re not going to tell Rafe. You’re going to pretend you don’t know any of this.”
“Uh-huh. Why would I do that?”
“Because I’m asking you to,” Nicole told her.
“I don’t know, Nicole. I feel like I should tell Rafe what happened.”
She didn’t want one more person to know if she could help it. “Just let it go, okay, Katie? This is between me and Griffin, and it’s almost over, anyway.”
“Damn it,” Katie muttered, “Griffin’s never getting another cookie from me as long as he lives.”
Outside, Connor stood up and headed for the gate between the yards. Nicole leaned toward the window and tilted her head so she could make sure that the, gate was closed. It wasn’t. Griffin must have left it open when he went next door.
Connor was going to run right into a construction area.
“I gotta go, Katie. Connor’s running off to our house, and the guys are working there.”
“Go, go! I’ll see you in a few days!”
Nicole hung up and sprinted for the doorway. She was across the yard and through the gate a couple seconds later. Connor was just toddling toward the house and the sound of the construction crew when Nicole came up behind him and swept him off his feet.
He giggled and shrieked when she lifted him into the air before plopping him onto her hip. Here was her world. Safe and secure and held close to her heart. Whatever else happened, she and Connor would get through it all. Together.
“Escape artist, huh?” She grinned and tickled him until he squirmed in delight. “No visiting our house without me!”
Laughing and pointing, Connor looked at the house and said, “Home!”
She followed his gaze. Home. Where they belonged. The two of them. The way it was supposed to be. Maybe it was time to start moving toward the future. Start letting go of the fantasy and take the first step back to normalcy. Nicole started for the house before she could think about it. It was past time to see what was going on in there. Past time to remember who she was and where she really belonged.
Besides, she could at least warn Griffin that Katie knew what was happening between them—and that his cookie connection had been cut off.
She took the back steps quickly, opened the screen door and stepped into a strange new world.
Griffin and Lucas were arguing over something at the counter, their backs to her, so they didn’t see her come in. Nicole took a moment to simply stare at what had been done to her grandmother’s old, familiar kitchen.
Shaking her head, she looked from the pale-green walls to the light-wood cupboards, from the tiled floor to the granite countertop that was exactly the stone she had once described to Griffin. There was a six-burner gas stove on one wall and a brand-new French-door fridge on another.
This wasn’t the kitchen she had asked for.
This was her dream kitchen.
The one she couldn’t afford.
“Griff!” Connor shrieked and both men spun around to stare at her with matching expressions of guilt.
But it was Griffin’s gaze Nicole caught with her own. Then she managed to croak out, “What the hell have you done?”
Nine
“Busted,” Lucas muttered.
“I can’t believe this,” Nicole said, setting Connor on his feet and glaring at Griffin.
“How did you—why did you—” She spun in a tight circle, sending her hair into a blond wave around her head before she stopped abruptly and glared at him again. “You had no right.”
Griffin gritted his teeth and faced the fury of the woman across from him. He’d known this moment would arrive, he just hadn’t expected it this soon. Lucas and the crew still had some finishing work to do, so Griffin had thought he would have a couple of days before this particular fight. Now that it was here, though, there was no avoiding it.
“Nicole, this is your dream kitchen.”
“Yeah, it is,” she said. “And one day I would have had it.”
“Instead, you have it now,” he said, refusing to acknowledge the cold, clipped tone to her voice. “What’s the difference?”
“Are you crazy?” she countered. “The difference is that I would have paid for it. I can’t afford this now.”
“It’s all been paid for,” Lucas offered, and she turned her glare
on him.
Jabbing a finger toward Griffin, she asked, “Yes, paid for by whom? Him? How is that ethical? What kind of business are you running anyway, Lucas?”
“Ethical?” He stiffened and shot a quick look at Griffin. “I’m damn ethical, and we did some great work here.”
“Work that I didn’t order,” she reminded him. “I didn’t sign off on any of this.” She gulped in a breath. “I could sue you!”
Lucas shot a hard look at Griffin.
“Relax,” he said, “she’s not going to sue King Construction.”
“Really?” Nicole argued. She folded her arms over her chest and tapped the toe of one foot against the gleaming tiles in a furious rhythm. “Know me that well, do you?”
“Yeah, Nicole,” Griffin said, taking his life in his hands to move a step closer to her. “I think I do. You’re pissed right now, but once you’ve had time to think it over, you’ll realize I was right to do this.”
“Oh, that’s so not going to happen,” she muttered darkly.
“If it helps,” Lucas put in, “Griff meant it as a surprise for you. He’s covered all the bills insurance won’t cover.”
“Not helping,” Griffin said without looking at his cousin.
“Has he?” Nicole’s gaze narrowed on Lucas briefly, but it was long enough to have the man taking one long step to the side of Griffin. Obviously, he was trying to stay out of range.
“A surprise.” Nicole glanced down at Connor to make sure her son was nearby, then she lifted her gaze to Griffin again. “Flowers are a surprise. A box of chocolates. A damn teddy bear. Not a kitchen!”
“Gotta admit, you were surprised,” he said and shrugged as if completely unaffected by her fury.
“And you thought I’d like this.”
“Of course you like it,” Griffin ground out. “Hell, you love it. You’re just too stubborn to admit that you’re glad I took care of the changes.”
Harlequin Desire February 2013 - Bundle 1 of 2: The King Next DoorMarriage With BenefitsA Real Cowboy (Kings of California) Page 12