by Amber Lynn
“Top it” he said, batting Brayden’s hand with his own.
Willow’s knees gave out and the ground hit her hard as she fell to it. It had to be a dream. The whole last week of feeling more secure than she had in the last fifteen years had to be her imagination. Because there was no way Connor just spoke his first words.
Chapter 22
Brayden almost dropped Connor when he heard his voice. He looked down at him for a second before movement from Willow caught his eye. Connor slid down his body as he put the kid down to rush over to Willow. Her knees had already hit the hard floor, and it looked like the rest of her body wasn’t far behind.
He got to her before her head hit, but her body as a whole felt like a wet noodle. Her eyes, while still open, stared out vacantly as the world around seemed to cease existing.
“Willow,” he said softly. When she didn’t snap out of it, he shook her and said her name louder.
Connor whimpered beside Brayden. He looked over to see tears brimming the kid’s eyes.
“It will be okay, buddy. Let’s just get her up and in the bed. She’s a little tired from everything that’s going on.”
Brayden knew what had set Willow over the edge. She was strong, strong enough to run from a madman and start out a life on the run. Megan showing up had been a scare, but it was hearing Connor speak that sent her tumbling down.
She’d made it clear the little boy had never said a word. During their chats while he was on the road, she’d shared that she didn’t really know if it was possible for Connor to speak. He made noises, but she wasn’t sure that meant speaking could or couldn’t happen.
She had her answer now, and it seemed it was a little too much given everything else going on in her life. He couldn’t believe Connor wasn’t her child. The two of them wore their love for each other in every action and facial expression. Brayden could see it now in Connor’s face as Brayden picked Willow up and carried her over to the bed. The kid crawled up in the bed and kneeled next to her.
Willow’s eyes closed for a second, then sprung open as she sat up. Brayden jerked out of the way, so their heads didn’t collide. She looked at him for a moment, but her gaze quickly turned to Connor, who had a tear streaking down his face. Taking a seat on the edge of the bed, Brayden watched Willow come back to life.
“Honey, did you really just talk?”
Her arms spread wide, causing Connor to scramble up the bed. Brayden noticed the tears in her eyes as she blinked and tried to get rid of them. A part of him felt he should leave the room to give them this moment by themselves, but a bigger part of him wished he could wrap his arms around both of them and savor what he knew was a huge milestone.
“I sorry. I know I not posed to.”
“What do you mean you’re not supposed to?” Brayden asked.
He’d never been good about standing back and letting things happen around him. Most of the time he could convince himself not to get involved, but that hadn’t worked in his sister’s marriage. And it sure as hell didn’t seem to be working where Willow and Connor were involved.
“Shh,” Willow whispered to Connor. “You can talk and make all the noise you want. He’s not here to tell us no.”
She didn’t speak to Brayden, but he supposed he had his answer. Not that it sat well with him. Connor seemed happy with the reply and even gave a small smile as he pulled back a little to look up at Willow.
“Who is he, Willow? I’ll kill him right now and we can be done with all of this.”
Brayden tried to let the truth of how much he wanted to kill the guy show in his eyes, but she didn’t meet them to see it. The words didn’t shock her, if her tired eyes were any indication. He’d seen Connor sleep, and assumed Willow did the same off in her room the night before. Of course, he’d slept little and they’d spent hours on the phone at nights when she probably should have been resting.
“You can’t kill him, Brayden. I’ve already involved you more than I should.”
She closed her eyes and took a deep breath with her nose in Connor’s hair. Brayden didn’t know if she was just taking the boy in or was using the smell to calm herself. He wanted to know which it was, or whether there was another reason for the gesture. He found himself wanting to know everything about the woman sitting across from him.
“I’m not going away, Willow, and if I have any say, you aren’t either. I know you want to just keep running, but you guys deserve better than that.”
She deserved better than to have Brayden’s lust urging him to lean over and kiss her too, but he had some work to do to get that under control. The fact that he could still taste the sweetness of her lips on his didn’t help.
“Yeah, well, we’re here right now. I take it this is where you want us to stay?”
Her eyes lifted and glanced around the room. The spare bedroom had absolutely no frills. The box springs happened to have a frame under them, but the bed really was the only thing in the room. Brayden thought it’d be silly to deck out a spare bedroom he didn’t plan on using. The only reason a bed even made it in the room was because Suzy and Noah had decided to crash at his place when they came for a weekend in the city.
“If it’s not comfortable enough for the two of you, you can have my room.”
His room wasn’t much better, and it would take some work to get all his clothes out of it, as well as his shampoo and such from the attached bath, but he didn’t care where he slept. The dark circles under Willow’s eyes screamed that she needed a good night sleep. Wherever she thought that could happen was good by him.
She shook her head. “This will be fine. I was just checking.”
“Okay, then are you guys up for dinner? Now that we know Connor can speak, I say he gets to tell us what he wants.”
They hadn’t glossed over the fact that words sprang from the kids mouth, but the accomplishment seemed to get a little lost in Willow’s reaction. Brayden wanted to reward the kid and hopefully promote the words to continue.
Connor tilted his head so he could see Brayden. His eyes looked unsure as he squinted. Ever since Brayden mentioned getting him some toys, the kid had lost the look of mistrust. Apparently, the talking thing brought back the unease.
“You not mad?”
His voice remained quiet as it had been every time he opened his mouth. Brayden was shocked it didn’t sound hoarser. It seemed like a normal little kid voice to him.
“Come here,” Brayden said, opening his arms the same way he’d seen Willow.
Connor hesitated, looking up to Willow for guidance. She nodded and the kid hustled over to Brayden. His chest tightened knowing that whatever the asshole did to the two of them hadn’t completely broken them. He was fairly sure he didn’t want to know what the guy had done to make Connor afraid to even speak, but eventually, he hoped he’d get more of the story from Willow.
It was the only way he’d know how slowly to kill the asshole who hurt them.
Brayden tried not to think too much about that as he did his own deep inhale of Connor’s hair. He knew he wasn’t still in diapers, but the kid kind of smelled like baby powder. His nephew pouted whenever anyone called him a baby, but Brayden had stopped really thinking of him as a baby.
Hence them watching scary movies and staying up late. He didn’t know what the age difference was between the two boys, but he knew he wouldn’t do the same with Connor. There was an urge in him to make sure the kid was allowed to be as young as possible for as long as he could. As soon as they got dinner out of the way, Brayden had plans to show him what it was like to really be four.
Since his family often told him he acted like a two-year-old, he figured he had plenty of experience. Meeting Willow’s gaze over Connor’s head, he smiled. They definitely had a lot to talk about after Connor fell asleep.
Chapter 23
“I think you should apply for guardianship of Connor.”
Willow had been staring out the window, looking at the unfamiliar skyline. She couldn’t remember t
he last time she’d seen so many lights. It was one of those things that could keep her attention, but Brayden’s words quickly broke the hold the lights had on her.
She whipped her head around to see him standing about two feet behind her. The nearness surprised her. She hadn’t heard him sneaking up on her. It said something about how stealthy he was, given she was used to listening for every pin drop.
“Is that what your lawyer friend suggests?”
After another round of Brayden claiming it was the right thing to do, Willow had assented. It was after eight, so she figured he’d get to it in the next few days. She hadn’t expected him to take his phone and immediately call his friend.
Thankfully, Connor had fallen asleep right after dinner, so he didn’t see the wide-eyed horror and fear filling Willow’s eyes. She’d made Brayden promise he wouldn’t say anything about them. And from the side of the conversation she heard, he hadn’t.
The story was about a friend of his who had taken on watching her neighbors’ kid because his parents were never around. For not being able to give the true predicament, Willow had to admit he’d done a good job. And from the mainly monosyllabic responses he gave, his friend didn’t push him or find the questions particularly odd. Willow probably read into that part, but when he’d hung up and explained the guardian stuff, he made it sound like it happened all the time.
She figured there were other options on the table, but Brayden seemed glued to the guardianship. Since she knew there were moments of frowns and gruff scoffs, there had to be more.
“His first suggestion was to call the cops.”
Willow nodded. She figured law enforcement would come up.
“I can’t say I’m an expert on guardianship, but I’m pretty sure they don’t hand it out to people have no biological claim on the child and have no means of supporting them. Plus, they’ll have to look into his parents.”
She didn’t see a legal paper making a lick of difference. It would only expose her and Connor.
Brayden took a deep breath. “Okay, so there are issues with the plan. I just really want you to have a claim on him, because I know how scared you are of losing him.”
She’d voiced the words already, but Willow wondered how much it showed on her. Brayden had been staring at her longer than Willow thought was acceptable. She didn’t really have a yardstick to compare it to. Surely only sparing a few glances at Connor while spending every other second looking at her was in some way improper. Especially, from someone who claimed they shouldn’t be kissing.
“Let’s talk about something else. You got your way with asking your friend his advice, so I think it’s time we talk about why the idea of kissing me scares you.”
Gracefully changing the topic of conversation would never be one of Willow’s strong suits. She couldn’t bring her cheeks to darken to the red she felt was necessary for her comment. She wasn’t embarrassed saying the words. A part of her felt like she should be, though.
The more she thought of the need and attraction she felt, the more she looked at it with her clinical eye. She’d read about biological needs. They hadn’t been required in her research, but the books she was given spoke of much more.
She knew Connor wasn’t delivered by a stork, the nonsense her parents once told her when she asked where babies came from. Connor had definitely not come from a stork. Willow had been on hand the day he was born. She cleaned him up and fell in love with him the second he was practically thrown in her arms.
“Maybe we should talk about why kissing me doesn’t scare you. You said he only wanted you for the medicine research.”
His look didn’t change, challenging her claim like his words did. She wondered for a second whether saying otherwise would change anything. Not being able to read him well, nor the ability to read between the lines, made it hard to know for sure where to take the conversation.
“I’m twenty-five years old, Brayden, and my hymen is intact. I know I asked you to explain things earlier, but I’ve figured out my body’s reactions. It wants to mate with you.”
Again, she felt her cheeks should darken and she should be embarrassed. The conclusion seemed logical. Her body heating around him had to be because it found him desirable as a mate. It picked up the strong qualities in him that would make equally strong offspring.
She’d thought maybe he felt some of the same. The way his jaw dropped open made her think otherwise. She imagined if he’d been eating, he would’ve choked rather than the slack jaw expression.
The man had been engaged, so he undoubtedly felt the urges before. Willow didn’t want to think of Megan, who’d managed to vanish by the time they emerged from the bedroom. She didn’t think the ex-fiancé would go away without a fight, but at least she’d gone away for the day.
“So.” Brayden got out before shaking his head. “You just said that.”
His words were lost, far away sounding. She could still feel his eyes on her, even though she didn’t lift her head to meet his.
“I spent the last fifteen years keeping my thoughts to myself. I’m guessing I shouldn’t be that straight-forward.”
A warm hand nudged her chin, trying to get her to look up. She didn’t fight the gesture, but she kept her eyes downcast.
“Do you meet anyone’s eyes?”
He’d have to be completely obtuse not to notice. She had to correct him, though.
“I’ve looked in your eyes before. They’re a rich color of chocolate with caramel flecks. And we already discussed the fact they get darker sometimes.”
“We did discuss that, although from your explanation, I think you know why they get darker.”
Her head moved up and down slightly. She had hoped the attraction was mutual, but it was nice hearing him confirm it.
“So you can look in my eyes, but you don’t like to. Is that because of him?”
“It’s not. And it’s not just you. I’ve actually seen more of your eyes than anyone else’s other than Connor’s in a long time. And most of the time I’ve only looked at his to know what he needs.”
She’d told him a lot, but she didn’t think he needed to know all the secrets of her brain. He wouldn’t understand the way it works. No one did, not even her.
“I think I’m flattered.” His words were flat, making her think it was a joke.
“I’d think you’d be more flattered about me wanting to mate with you, but I get the feeling this conversation about my eyes is meant to distract me away from it.”
“Believe me, I’m more than flattered about that. And since you were so straightforward about it, I won’t deny I feel it too. I want you so much I can’t even think straight.”
Willow felt his eyes drift away. She could guess the words he didn’t say. Her heart fluttered in relief. While her body wanted him, her head was smart enough to know giving in wouldn’t be the right thing for her or Connor. At least not right now. She needed her body to stop ruling her actions so she could think straight.
“You won’t touch me.”
His eyes didn’t dart back, and a stillness filled the room. As much as she knew it was right, she didn’t know how to feel about it. Rejected would most likely be the right word, but she thought it should hurt more. Not that she really felt any hurt. Maybe a little disappointment. Even with his admission and the tingles of something she felt from him, she’d known where the conversation would go.
If it went any other way, she would’ve taken Connor and left. Her body would hate her for it, but she didn’t need a man more focused on mating than making good on the promise of helping her. Yes, she knew her logic and thoughts were all over the board, but they seldom went in straight lines.
“Thank you,” she said, clearing the silence. “If there’s nothing else, I think I’ll head to bed.”
Willow managed to smile as she tried to walk around Brayden. Tried being the important word as he reached an arm out to stop her. His grip was light, not much more than fingertips touching her forearm. She could’ve
kept going if she wanted but waited.
“I have practice in the morning, so I might be gone when you wake up. There’s plenty of food, and I’m not just talking peanut butter sandwiches. You guys eat and hang out. I’ll be home around noon and hopefully have some contacts for you to try.”
“Do you have scissors here?”
She figured he did, but she didn’t want to rifle through his drawers looking for them. Her hair wouldn’t be easy to cut off. She’d cut Connor’s for years, so she had experience. But it was a little different cutting off your own hair.
“I can help you when I get home.”
He let go of her arm and twirled a strand of her hair around one of his fingers. There was no question about what she wanted the scissors for. She shook her head.
“I have a feeling I’m going to miss the long hair more than you,” he said.
There was a brief spark of warmth on her cheek from the brush of his lips before he stepped away and disappeared down the hall. She couldn’t remember a time she’d seen someone move that fast.
Chapter 24
“I don’t care if you’ve turned into an old man. You’re going out tonight and getting drunk and laid.”
Brayden ignored Trevor’s loud comment as he sighed and sat in his stall. Trevor was already geared up for practice, while Brayden had literally run to make sure he wasn’t late. The morning hadn’t gone as planned.
He’d woken up, or rather decided to finally get out of bed after a night of zero sleep, hoping to grab some food and head out to run errands before he was due for practice. He stopped short when he found Willow and Connor taking bites out of sandwiches. Narrowing his eyes, he’d questioned whether they were eating peanut butter sandwiches.
She’d shaken her head and opened hers to show there was grape jelly along with the peanut butter. Willow had insisted that the jelly made it so it wasn’t just a peanut butter sandwich. He didn’t know if she was being a smart ass or her brain just worked that way. Either way, the technicality put him in a mood that continued hours later.