Shank's Mare

  'Ho-ho-ho!' laughed the woman. 'So you think Kyōto people arc bad, do you? And you won't pay even fifty coppers for a bit of candle? Do you think it's right of you to complain of things being dear after you've eaten everything up?'

  'Oh, don't let's have any argument,' said Yaji. 'There's a gold piece for you. You must make that do.'

  He threw her a gold piece as he spoke, and the woman took it and went down the stairs grumbling.

  'Ain't it awful, Kita,' said Yaji.

  'I don't like giving in to them,' said Kita. 'Can't we get our own back?'

  Just then Kichiya came in.

  'What did you want to go and leave me alone for?' she asked. 'What are you doing? Aren't you going to bed?'

  She seized hold of Kita's hand and dragged him away.

  'Here, here,' said Kita. 'What are you doing, taking off my girdle?'

  He spoke loud so that Yaji should hear him.

  'It's warm to-night,' she said. 'I'll make you comfortable.'

  It is a rule among the courtesans in the West Country that when they have a guest for the first time they let it appear as if their sash-band had come undone by itself. This Kichiya, however, was a middle-aged woman and not very knowing, so she unfastened her sash, and took off Kita's kimono as if she were on terms of the closest intimacy with him. Thus they lay down.

  Soon the night began to deepen, and only the lonely sound of the dogs barking far off could be heard and the sound of drums. It was two o'clock before Kichiya opened her eyes and spoke to Kitahachi.

  'How sound you sleep,' she said.

  'What is it?' asked Kita.

  'I want to go somewhere,' said the girl.

  She got up and put on Kita's kimono, which had been thrown down beside the pillow, and fastened her sash.

  'Lend me your kimono for a bit,' she said. 'I want to look like a man and deceive the people downstairs.'

  'It suits you fine,' said Kita. 'What a joke!'

  'I must tie something round my head,' she said. Then she took a towel and tied it round her head and went downstairs.

  Kita did not go to sleep again, but lay and waited for the girl to return. 'Perhaps she's gone to another guest,' he thought, and continued to wait. Then the bell sounded for four o'clock and soon day began to dawn. Deciding that he could wait no longer, Kita clapped his hands loudly and the mistress of the house came upstairs in answer to his call.

  'Who's that calling?' she asked.

  'I did,' said Kita. 'That girl I had went downstairs some time ago and I've seen nothing of her since. Just call her, will you?'

  'There's a row going on downstairs about her,' said the woman.

  'What's the row?' asked Kita.

  'The girl's run off in a man's kimono.'

  'What?' said Kita. 'Do you mean to say she's run away? How awful! That man's kimono was mine.'

  'What was she doing with your kimono?' asked the woman.

  'She said she wanted to give them a surprise downstairs,' said Kita,' and asked me to lend it to her.'

  'And did you lend it to her?' asked the woman.

  'Yes,' said Kita. 'I didn't know she was going to run away. How was I to tell? Haven't you got a kimono you could lend me? Just go downstairs and ask at once.'

  'I'll tell 'em that downstairs,' said the woman, and she went down.

  Soon a big man in a dressing gown, apparently the master of the house, came upstairs, accompanied by the cook and two or three other men. They came stamping up the stairs and stood round Kita's pillow.

  'Are you the fellow that lent the girl a kimono?' asked the landlord.

  'Yes, that's me,' said Kita.

  'You, is it?' said the landlord. 'You villain! Get up and let's look at your face.'

  'What are you making such a fuss about it for?' asked Kita.

  'Making a fuss?' said the landlord. 'If you lent her your kimono you must know where she's gone. Tell me the truth.'

  'Don't talk nonsense!' said Kita. 'I don't know anything about it.'

  'It's no use telling me that,' said the landlord. 'I know you had something to do with it. '

  'Nonsense!' said Kita.

  'He talks big, don't he?' said the landlord. 'Drag him out. '

  The men immediately dragged Kita out of the bed, awakening Yaji, who jumped up when he saw what they were doing.

  'Here, that's my mate,' he said. 'What are you going to do with him?'

  He tried to push the landlord aside but was held by the other men.

  'They're working together,' cried the cook. 'Let's take 'em both. '

  Yaji and Kita were then dragged downstairs. Yaji was completely mystified as to what the trouble was about till, to his surprise, he heard the story from Kita, who was now quite repentant of having lent the girl the kimono. But the master of the house would not listen to their excuses and tied them to a post in the kitchen, where, as the day advanced, all the people in the neighbourhood came to stare at them, much to their mortification.

  Among the visitors who came to see them was a man named Jōkichi, who was apparently the owner of the house.

  'I've heard about Kichiya running away,' he said. 'Where are the fellows who helped her?'

  'There they are, tied up there,' said the landlord.

  'They look like thieves,' said Jōkichi.

  'They pretend they're travellers,' said the landlord,'but I don't suppose they have any home of their own. '

  'I feel sorry for them though,' said the owner.

  He and the landlord both came nearer to have a look at them.

  'You've got yourselves into a nice fix by your wickedness,' said Jōkichi. 'Aren't there some more of you? You'd better confess all you know. '

  'I don't know anything about it at all,' said Yaji. 'We only came here to spend the night. Can't you help us? My hands are tied so I can't hold them up in prayer to you, but I'll do it with my feet. Here, Kita, help me. '

  'All right,' said Kita, and he began praying to Kompira. 'Praise be to the Great Gongen Sama Kompira and may he remove from me this misfortune. Namu Kimyō Chōrai. Namu Kimyō Chōrai.'

  'What's the good of praying to Kompira,' said the landlord. 'That won't help you. Fortunately you haven't got any clothes on, so you're just right for trying the cold water penance.'

  'No, no,' said Kita. 'I'm really a believer in Kompira, but you see I'm not like other believers. I've taken a vow against the cold water penance. I only get the protection of the god when I wear plenty of clothes, and drink warm drinks and get near the fire. Won't you let me have a kimono so that I can get warm?'

  'You're a cunning rogue,' said the landlord.

  'No, it's really quite true,' said Yaji. 'It's a great misfortune for me to have to associate with this fellow. I suffer from chronic spasms. Oh!'

  'If you've got spasms,' said the landlord,'I'll tie the rope a bit tighter round your waist. That will cure you.'

  'No, no,' said Yaji. 'If you'll just untie the rope so that I can jump about I'll soon be better.'

  'Ha-ha-ha!' laughed Jōkichi. 'This is a clever fellow. You'd better let him go. They're both of them fools. I expect he only lent the girl the kimono.'

  'Yes,' said the landlord. 'They neither of them seem very bright. Perhaps I'd better let them go after all.'

  'Oh, thank you, thank you,' said Kita. 'But I can't go out without any clothes.'

  'Get out,' said the landlord. 'I don't want to listen to any of your excuses.'

  'I'll go then,' said Kita. 'I'll go.'

  'Go along with you,' said Jōkichi. 'A couple of fools!'

  They untied the ropes and released them.

  'See what you got us into, Kita,' said Yaji.

  'What about me?' said Kita. 'I got my kimono stolen. Oh, how cold it is?'

  'Ha-ha-ha!' laughed the landlord. 'Well, I'll take pity on you and lend you something to cover you.'

  'Thank you, thank you,' said Kita. 'Anything will do. I shall be so grateful.'

  'Oh, you've turned beggar, have you?' said the landlord
. 'Bring a piece of matting from the shed. That'll suit you.'

  'There's that straw bag that the things came in yesterday,' said the servant. 'Wear that.'

  'What, put that on?' said Kita. 'How cruel you are!'

  'Do you despise my kindness?' said the landlord. 'Won't you wear it?'

  'Thank you, thank you,' said Kita. 'I think I'd like best to go as I am.'

  'What a chap you are,' said Yaji. 'Here, I'll lend you my raincoat.'

  He took off his raincoat and put it on Kita, and they started off.

  BOOK SEVEN

  FIRST PART

  E read in the poem that the capital is famous for its flowers and its temples, which, there is no denying, are very large and impressive. Then there are the flowers in spring and the maples in the autumn. In all directions beautiful scenery is to be found, and if you take with you a tub of the famous sake of Kamogawa your spirits will be lifted up to the skies. The merchants there are dressed in clothes different from those of other parts, for in Kyōto, they say, people will spend their money on clothes at the expense of their stomachs till they faint with hunger in the streets. This is because the cloths from the Nishijin looms have the colour of delicate flowers and are as pure as the waters of the River Hōri. Then there is the face powder of Kamamoto, and the toilet powder of Kawabata, as white as snow. The folding fans of Mieidō, the open fans of Fushimi, the rice-cakes of sweet-smelling Kōdōmae, the Daibutsu rice-cakes of Maruyama, the spikenard shoots of Daigo, the leaf buds of Kurama, which are noted in the Teikinōrai, the turnips of Tōji, the vegetables of Mibu—these are some of the things of which the Kyōto people are proud.

  Thus it was that, for the first time, those rowdy travellers, Yajirobei and Kitahachi, came to the city of so many famous products. They had completed their stolen journey to Isé and were now taking an opportunity to see the capital, after they had boarded the wrong boat on the River Yodo, lost their baggage, drunk a cup in the pleasure-quarters of Gojō in the best of spirits, and had paid heavily for it.

  Kitahachi had lost his good name and was only kept from being naked by Yajirobei having lent him a cotton coat which he fortunately had. Penniless amid all the amusements of the capital, Kita wandered on shivering in the keen morning air, till he got to Gojō Bridge, where of old Ushiwakamaru fought with Benkei. Turning to the west there, they passed by the historic remains of Kawara-no-in and of Kadodé Hachiman, along by the bank of the River Takasé, where all day the boats are being hauled along.

  'It makes me madder every time I think of it,' said Kita. 'If we could only find an old kimono somewhere. I'd like a wadded one, —just one would do. Haven't you any advice to give me, Yaji?'

  'You don't want to buy a kimono,' said Yaji. 'When Edo people go on stolen pilgrimages it's the custom for them to come back naked.'

  'But it's so cold,' said Kita.

  'Well, luckily, there's a bath-house there,' said Yaji. 'Go in and warm yourself.'

  'That's an excellent idea,' said Kita, and he darted off to the bath-house.

  There was a wicket door in front of the house and a curtain. Kita dived through the curtain and rushed into the shop.

  'What can I do for you?' asked the keeper of the shop, who was astonished at this abrupt entrance of a naked man. 'What is it you require?'

  Kita looked round and saw that it was not a bath-house. 'What a shame!' he said. 'I thought it was a bath-house.'

  'Ha-ha-ha!' laughed the shopkeeper. 'That's because you saw the character for bath on the door, I expect. You thought it read Public Bath, but it's the name of a medicine to put in the bath.'

  'So it is,' said Yaji. 'What a joke!'

  'Oh-h!' shuddered Kita. 'I'm colder than ever now.'

  Thus Kita went on grumbling till they came to a shop where a number of second-hand kimonos were hung out for sale. At the entreaty of Kita, Yaji picked out a blue wadded garment and asked the price.

  'Good day, good day,' said the shopkeeper. 'Please sit down and have a smoke. I'll get you some tea. Oh, the fire's gone out. Bring some fire, boy. "

  'Never mind the tea,' said Kita, shivering. 'How much is this kimono?'

  'Yes, yes,' said the shopkeeper. 'That's a good one. I'll let you have it cheap.'

  Here the apprentice brought the tea. 'This tea's cold,' said the shopkeeper. 'Why don't you bring some hot tea?'

  'The missus said I needn't make any tea as she was going to have rice gruel this morning,' said the boy,'so I didn't make any. I've brought what was made yesterday.'

  'Yesterday's tea!' said Yaji. 'It's like the wind let by a kappa. By the way that reminds me. Excuse my rudeness, but could you show me the convenience?'

  'Do you want to go there?' asked the shopkeeper.

  'It's not lukewarm,' put in the boy. 'It's boiling.'

  'Who boiled it?' asked his master.

  'I've just been there,' said the boy. 'Go and look. It's steaming like anything.'

  'You dirty young rascal,' said the landlord.

  'Never mind about that,' said Kita,'but just tell me how much this kimono is. Let's settle it quick. I'm so cold I can't stand it.'

  'Get more over there in the sunshine if you're cold,' said the shopkeeper. 'There was a gentleman here yesterday who said this was a very warm house, and after he'd basked in the sun all day he said he didn't want a kimono if he could come here every day and warm himself in the sun.'

  'Oh, bother the sun!' said Kita. 'Do you want to sell this kimono or don't you?'

  'Yes, yes,' said the shopkeeper. 'Is this the one you want?'

  'You must make it cheap,' said Kita.

  'It's the blue one, isn't it?' said the shopkeeper. Here he brought out his abacus. 'I can't let you have that under three thousand five hundred coppers.'

  'That's too dear,' said Kita. 'I come from Edo and I know all about the price of old clothes. Don't try to fool me. Tell me the right price.'

  'Ah, perhaps you're in the business too,' said the shopkeeper.

  'No, no,' said Kita. 'I'm in the pawning business.'

  'Do you receive goods or do you pawn them?' asked the shopkeeper.

  'His business is to pawn them,' said Yaji.

  'That's how I know what things are worth,' said Kita. 'You wouldn't get more than a thousand coppers on a kimono like that. The pawnbroker would lose if he gave more on it.'

  'What are you talking about?' said the shopkeeper. 'Any widow pawnbroker would certainly lend you a gold piece on a kimono like that.'

  'Nonsense!' said Kita. 'Do you think I'd lend a gold piece on a thing like that?'

  'Anybody would lend a gold piece on it,' said the shopkeeper.

  'Do you think I'd get it back?' asked Kita.

  'Of course you would,' said the shopkeeper.

  'That's what you say,' said Kita,'but you're not to be depended upon. Where's the money that I lent you the other day for those pants? Then there's the lined kimono that I lent you money on, when you said your children were all sick and that your wife had died of the plague and you hadn't got enough money to pay for the funeral. I lent you the money then because you pleaded so earnestly, and now you can't repay it. Do you call that being honest? I think I ought to take this cotton garment as security for that lined kimono.'

  'What nonsense are you talking?' said the shopkeeper angrily. 'How dare you say that my wife died of the plague?'

  'Don't mind him,' said Yaji. 'He says all sorts of bad things. Just let us have that kimono for a thousand coppers.'

  'Well, it's my first sale this morning,' said the shopkeeper,'so I'll let you have it for that.'

  Thereupon he clapped his hands to show that the bargain was concluded.

  'Then the kimono's mine,' said Kita, and he put it on while Yaji was paying for it and returned Yaji his coat.

  Kitahachi's spirits immediately rose when they got out of the shop. 'I say, Yaji,' he cried. 'Don't I look smart? We talked that old clothes man over, didn't we? It's cheap at a thousand coppers. Look, the collar's not dirty a bit.'


  'It looks like a servant's blue coat,' said Yaji. 'It's just right, because now I look like the master.'

  'What do they call this place, I wonder,' said Kita. 'There are a lot of fine girls going about.'

  'Some of them have got purple hoods on their heads, I notice,' said Yaji,'so I suppose it's Miyagawa-chō.'

  'Look at that beauty just coming along,' said Kita. 'Lucky I bought a kimono. That coat of yours was better than being naked, but I couldn't have passed her in it without feeling ashamed.'

  He hastily arranged the collar of the kimono and folded it straight in front as two singing girls passed him. After they had passed one of them turned round to look at Kita's kimono.

  'Look at that man's kimono, Hatsuné,' she said. 'What big crests it's got on it. How funny! Ho-ho-ho!'

  'What a fool he looks!' said Hatsuné. 'Who'd care for a fellow like that? Ho-ho-ho!'

  They went on their way laughing, while Yaji examined Kita's new kimono.

  'I say, Kita,' he said,'look at your kimono. There's a big crest on your back, all on one side.'

  'Where, where?' asked Kita. He twisted round to look and saw that the kimono was made of pieces of flag sewn together and dyed, and covered all over with big crests.

  'Oh, how dreadful!' said Kita.

  'Ha-ha-ha!' laughed Yaji. 'There's a big carp going up a waterfall on your sleeve. This kimono's made of pieces of flags.'

  'That old dealer's got the better of us,' said Kita. 'That's why it was so cheap. I'll go back and give him something.'

  'Leave him alone,' said Yaji. 'You shouldn't be such a fool. It's his business to sell his goods, so it can't be helped.'

  Kita went on grumbling till they came to Shijō-dōri, where is situated the fashionable and prosperous Gion-machi. From the theatres on both sides of the road came the inspiriting sound of the drums and the hoarse cries of the two ticket-sellers, who were both dressed in bright costumes of the same pattern.

  'Here you are, here you are!' they cried. 'Come in and see the famous Sangoro commit suicide. Come and see Arakichi and Tomokichi in their famous performance.'