Shank's Mare

  'Ha-ha-ha!' laughed Saheiji. 'Excuse my rudeness, but it's funny to hear you two gentlemen talking about wearing all kinds of silk clothes. Well, let's get along to the Amida Lake and the Izumiya at Sunaba.'

  'Look here,' said Yaji. 'I'm tired of temples and such. Can't we go somewhere amusing so that it won't seem so long waiting till to-morrow?'

  'Well then, I'll tell you what to do,' said Saheiji. 'I'll hire some kimono for you and then you'll be able to go to Shinmachi to-night. You can pay me for them afterwards. I know the keeper of the Ageya teahouse, and as you're going to get a hundred gold pieces to-morrow morning that will be all right. What do you think?'

  'Yes, yes,' said Kita. 'That's a good idea.'

  'Then let's go back to the inn at once,' said Yaji,'and we'll get you to carry out your plan.'

  Delighted with the idea, they hurried along Shinsaibashi-suji till they reached Dōtombori, which is the busiest part of the city, as it is situated between Shimanouchi and Sakamachi and beautiful courtesans and singing girls there abound. It was already four o'clock and from the theatres and wrestling halls came the noisy clamour of the people. Pushing their way through the sightseers, slipping along quickly like thieves, not stopping to look at the announcements in front of the theatres, snatching themselves from the detaining hands of the waitresses outside the teahouses, jostled by the kago carriers and the postboys, the three returned quickly to Nagamachi.

  'Here we are,' said Saheiji.

  'Welcome back,' cried the maid.

  'Thank you, thank you,' said Kita. 'Well, what about that plan?'

  'Certainly,' said Saheiji. 'I'll go and see about it at once.

  'Let's be quick,' said Kita.

  He and Yaji went to their room to wait for Saheiji, and soon the maid came in.

  'Would your honours like to take a bath now,' she inquired,'or would you like to have supper first?'

  'We can't eat any supper,' said Yaji. 'We're in a hurry. But I'll just get into the bath.'

  'It'll make us late,' said Kita. 'What do you want with a bath?'

  'Well, I'll just wash my face then,' said Yaji.

  'Get out!' said Kita. 'Ha-ha-ha!'

  Yaji went off to the bath and in a little time Saheiji came back with the hired clothes tied up in a bundle.

  'Sorry to have kept you waiting,' he said. He undid the bundle and Kita turned over the clothes.

  'They're all very plain,' he said.

  'Yes, but they're quite the latest style,' said Saheiji. 'You'd look very well in that black one.'

  'What a terrible crest it has on it, and it's too long and the sleeves are too big,' said Kita. 'I should look like an octopus in it. What's that striped one there?'

  'It's of silk,' said Saheiji.

  'Well, this speckled one's all right,' said Kita.

  But when he spread it out he found it was a woman's kimono.

  'Ha-ha-ha!' laughed Saheiji. 'I thought it was a man's. Never mind, put it on.'

  'I'll tell you what I'll do,' said Kita. 'As it's got short sleeves I'll put it on underneath and wear the other on top.'

  He put the two kimono on, one over the other, and was just tying the girdle when Yaji came back from the bath.

  'Halloa, you've got back, Saheiji,' said Yaji. 'Kita's got his clothes on too. He looks so fine that everybody will know they're hired.'

  'Don't stand there trying to be funny,' said Kita,'but get your clothes on at once.'

  'This black one will do for me,' said Yaji. 'I'd look like a lord in that if I had a long sword.'

  'Look here,' said Kita,'are you going to get dressed or are you going out bare with only a long sword on. You're not going to feel Kiyomori's pulse so you'd better put your clothes on.'

  'What about a cloak?' asked Yaji.

  'Wear this one with the crest,' said Saheiji.

  'What a short cloak!' said Kita. 'It makes you look like a beggar.'

  'Well, you needn't talk,' replied Yaji. 'You look like a quack-doctor's assistant.'

  'If you're ready now we'll go,' said Saheiji.

  'But I haven't been to the bath yet,' said Kita.

  'Don't talk nonsense,' said Yaji. 'Come on, let's go.'

  Thus they started off. Saheiji thought that as the two had won a prize in the lottery he would be able to get a share of it, so he had persuaded the clerk at the inn to give him a letter of introduction to a teahouse in Shinmachi, and it was there that he was going to take them.

  Thus the three went along Nagamachi, their heads in the clouds, and through Sakai-suji, till they quickly reached Junkei-machi. This place is famous for its night-market. On each side of the road were booths, with not an inch to spare between them, all brightly lit by lanterns. Here were displayed clothes, furniture, bags, combs, coral, agate, and on the next stall, tubs, kegs, riceboxes, pestles, dippers. Here were persons looking for shrines to which they could make offerings, or for a figure of the Buddha or Kwannon, and running off without paying the full price for them. Here were persons in clogs buying hats and there persons in straw-sandals selling rush-sandals. Here were persons in the exchange-shops jingling money in the scales, there ironmongers whose mouths were as sharp as the swords they sold. Here were the fishmongers bawling their rotten goods.

  'Here's your fine bream,' they called.

  Then there was the cry of the sweet potato man: 'Hokkori! Hokkori!. Eat 'em while they're hot. Hokkori!'

  'Here's your tasty boiled herring,' called another.

  Then there was the sushi seller. 'Here you are,' he called. 'Try our famous mackerel and cockles.'

  'I say, Yaji,' said Kita. 'Look there. There are some of those nice rice-cakes we had at Kyōto. Let's buy some. We didn't have any supper to-night and I'm getting awfully hungry.'

  'So there is,' said Yaji, and he asked the man the price.

  'Ay, ay,' said the man. 'These here are four coppers, and those there are six coppers.'

  'They're fine,' said Yaji as he gobbled one down. 'Just wrap us up some.'

  The man wrapped some up in a bamboo leaf and Yaji went along eating them.

  'Here, give us some,' said Kita.

  'I'll give you the leaf when I've finished them,' said Yaji.

  'None of that,' said Kita. 'Just pass them over.'

  While they were arguing about the cakes a dog suddenly jumped up and snatched them.

  'Oh, oh!' said Yaji.

  'What's the matter?' asked Kita.

  'Some dog jumped up and got 'em,' said Yaji.

  'Bow-wow!' barked the dog.

  'Oh, it's you, is it?' said Yaji. 'I'll teach you.' But when he tried to kick the dog it ran away, and when Yaji ran after it he stumbled over the edge of a well that was in the middle of the road and fell.

  'Oh! Oh!' he yelled. 'What do they want to stick a well there for, right in the middle of the cross-roads?'

  'This is called the cross-roads well,' explained Saheiji.

  'It serves you right for not giving me any,' said Kita.

  As they went along, pushing their way through the crowd, they saw a fortune-teller in a large hat, which completely covered his face, calling to the people to come and have their fortunes told.

  'Come along,' he cried. 'Don't be afraid. Come and have your fortune told. Show me a letter and I can tell by the colour of the ink whether it is light or dark. If you have lost anything I can tell you where it isn't. I can tell you in what you can't put your trust. I can tell you whether a person will be late when they don't come to an appointment, or early when they do. Whether I'm right or wrong it's all the same charge, sixteen coppers. That's the only thing in which I make no mistake. Come along. Come along.'

  'I say, Kita,' said Yaji. 'Let's see whether he knows we're going to get a hundred gold pieces to-morrow.'

  'Ah, that would be fun,' replied Kita.

  'Just tell us our fortunes, will you?' said Yaji, and he held out sixteen coppers.

  The fortune-teller looked at Yaji out of the corner of his eye as he took the money and laid
out the sticks on the divining board.

  'Aha!' he said, after he had studied them for a while. 'I see you will be extraordinarily lucky.'

  'That's right,' said Yaji. 'You've got it just right.'

  'Ain't I right?' said the fortune-teller. 'Ke is kon, and kon is konkwai and konkwai in the vulgar language is fox. That is you will have a fox's luck. Truly I see that unexpected fortune awaits you.'

  'Bravo!' said Kita. 'You've got it just right.'

  'Nevertheless,' continued the fortune-teller,'a change of fortune is Heaven's decree, and bodings of Heaven's decree are mystical. For if the fortune of Earth and the fortune of Heaven are joined together, then, as the Book tells us, between Heaven and Earth everything escapes and there is nothing left. When there is no bullet the gun is empty. In everything great care is demanded.'

  'That's not right,' exclaimed Yaji. 'There's no truth in that. My fortune's as safe as if I'd got it in my hand. You're telling us bad luck.'

  'It's all the same price,' said the fortune-teller,'whether I'm right or wrong.'

  'Come along, Yaji,' said Kita. 'It's sixteen coppers clean thrown away.'

  Grumbling they went along over Shinmachi Bridge to Hyōtan-machi. This quarter was first licensed in the Kwanei era and from ancient times it has been very popular. Peeping into the gaily decorated houses as they went along, they passed through Echigo-machi, where they chaffed the common courtesans who caught hold of their sleeves, and came at last to Kuken-machi.

  'This large building is the Ageya,' said Saheiji.

  'Aha! It's quite a big affair,' said Kita.

  'This is where we go in,' directed Saheiji. 'Please wait a minute.'

  He left them at the entrance and himself went into the kitchen. The landlord of the Kawachiya, the inn in Nagamachi where they were staying, sometimes gave his guests introductions to the quarter, so when Saheiji handed in the introduction, the landlord of the teahouse bustled out to meet them in his best clothes.

  'Welcome, welcome,' he said. 'Here, waitress, show these gentlemen to a room. Please follow her.'

  'Excuse me,' said Yaji. 'Here, Kita, aren't you coming? What are you standing at the door for like the willow-tree outside a gardener's shop?'

  'Ha-ha-ha!' laughed Saheiji. 'Bravo!'

  They were conducted along the passage, past room after room, till they came to a very luxurious room at the back. Saheiji, who treated them both very politely, followed them in and took a seat near the door, while a waitress brought tea and the tobacco-box. Then the landlord appeared.

  'Thank you very much for giving me your custom,' he said.

  'Are you the landlord?' said Yaji. 'Well, look here. I've come up from Edo on business, and this is the first time I have been in your city. As I hope to patronise you many times during my stay here, I would ask your best attention. I may tell you that I am not one to spare money when I begin spending and don't mind how much it is. But as I'm a trader by nature and this is the first time I've visited you, I should like you to let us have everything very cheap this evening, just for a start. Eh, Saheiji?'

  'Yes, yes,' said Saheiji. 'Let's arrange it this way. As you've only just arrived no doubt you're very tired, so I think it would be better for you just to have a little sake and then go home to bed. You can come back again to-morrow night.'

  He said this because he thought it was rather unsafe to let them run up a large bill before they had got the hundred pieces of gold, which, after all, there might be some mistake about. He remembered what the fortune-teller had said and was not very easy in his mind in consequence, and he had therefore decided not to leave them there but to wait till they had had a few drinks and take them back to the inn again.

  'Anything will do for me,' said Yaji.

  'Well then, waitress,' said Saheiji,'we'll only have a look at the girls.'

  Meanwhile sake and comestibles were brought in and the waitresses helped each of the guests. There was a great noise going on in the next room, where a guest, who appeard to be a Westcountry samurai, had summoned a buffoon and a crowd of dancing girls, all of whom were laughing and joking. Through the cracks in the sliding doors Yaji and Kita peeped in to see what was going on. Soon the girls began to sing.

  He's only got three hairs

  On the top of his head,

  But he rattles out the money,

  Since he's a rattlehead.

  Gompachi's all right,

  But he's changed his name you see.

  Now you must swear by Tegetsu.

  Come, take the oath with me.

  'That's a song about the southern Gompachi, isn't it?' said the buffoon, whose name was Sōhachi.

  'Yes,' replied one of the singing girls. 'Ton an showed us the dance to that song.'

  'Come on,' said the samurai. 'I'll give you a dance. Play up.'

  He stood up and tied a towel round his head, so that both his ears stuck out, and then, putting his cloak over one shoulder, he took a fan in his hand and began to dance and sing while the girls played the samisen:

  Kamé of Suyama,

  Oh an old fox is she!

  Kamé of Suyama,

  She's well known to me.

  Yoriya aikori!

  Yo aikori yo!

  Come a little nearer

  And I shall show you where

  Behind here is a little hut.

  Oh, Kamé lives there.

  Yoriya aikori!

  Yo aikori yo!

  There she sleeps at night,

  A pumpkin 'neath her head.

  Come along with me

  And you shall share her bed.

  'Bravo! Bravo!' they all cried when he had finished.

  'Oh, Oh!' groaned the samurai. 'I am tired. I shall be scolded by my girl for getting drunk like this. Terrible, terrible!'

  'Ho-ho-ho!' laughed all the girls. 'What things you say! We don't know what you mean.'

  'Why? Why?' asked the samurai.

  'Oh, you horrid man,' cried the girls. 'Look at his face. Look what strange eyes he makes. How bright and glaring they are!'

  'You are insulting,' cried the samurai, in a sudden burst of anger. 'Look at your own faces instead of mine. What hateful faces they are, ail swollen up like the globe-fish or the cormorant. There's nothing pleasing about them. I'm going home.'

  He stood up, but the waitresses caught hold of him. 'There, there,' they said. 'There's nothing for you to get angry about.'

  'Don't be rude, Shimé,' said the buffoon. 'I'll tell you what we'll do. We're getting rather bored, so to liven thing up, let's be as jolly as if we were in a steam-bath.'

  'A steam-bath is an empty bath,' said the samurai. 'He takes me for a dunderhead. I've a good mind to beat him for his rudeness.'

  Apparently the samurai was a man who got angry in his cups. He swore he was going and they were all trying to detain him, when in the middle of the dispute Hikifuné, a courtesan, accompanied by a little girl, came in.

  'There, she's come,' cried the waitresses.

  'Oh, I am tired,' said Hikifuné. 'What's the matter?'

  'He's awfully angry,' said a waitress. 'He says he's going.'

  'Didn't I tell you I was going to Suhama's house and you had to wait?' said Hikifuné. 'And now you say you're going away. If you don't like being here go away, please.'

  'No, no,' said the samurai. 'I'm not really angry. Only the people here are so rude. But never mind, never mind.'

  'Then there's nothing to make a noise about. Come along.'

  Conducted by the crowd of girls, they went away to another room.

  By this time some ten courtesans had gathered in the next room. Then a waitress came in carrying a sake bottle and cup and another with a book and a writing box.

  'Ogiya-no-Orikoto,' called the waitress. 'Please come here.'

  Orikoto came in, took the cup, pretended to drink and put it down again. Then she looked at the waitress's face, tittered, and went out.

  'Tsuchiya-no-Hinamatsu,' called the waitress. 'Please come here.'
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br />   Thus each courtesan like the first, took the cup and pretended to drink, while Yaji and Kita looked on, attracted by the strangeness of the scene, and made idle remarks which I will not repeat.

  'Which one would you like?' asked the waitress.

  'I'd like them all,' said Kita. 'What was the name of the third one?'

  The waitress looked in her book. 'That was Nishi-no-Ogiya-no-Azumaji,' she said.

  'Well, we only came to-night to have a look' said Saheiji. 'You can come to-morrow night and stay as long as you like.'

  'Why not to-night?' asked Yaji.

  'I think it would be better to do as I suggest,' said Saheiji, who was longing to get them away. Yaji, however, felt great reluctance to leave.

  'Let's have some more sake at any rate,' he said.

  'Shall I call in some singing-girls?' asked the waitress.

  'No, no,' said Saheiji. 'There isn't time really.'

  'We didn't come here only to drink sake,' said Kita. 'We ought to spend more for the good of the house.'

  'Yes, please don't go yet,' said the waitress. 'Let me take off your cloaks.'

  Several of the girls jumped up to help them take off their cloaks, and while they were folding them up they began to titter at what they saw on the lining.

  'There's a great big ten marked on them,' whispered one of the girls. 'They must have hired them somewhere,' and they all began whispering to each other and laughing. It appeared that all the clothes let out were marked on the lining with a big 'ten' done in white cotton, and as all the girls knew this they were laughing at them. Saheiji heard them laughing and guessed what they were laughing at, but Yaji and Kita were quite unconscious of the joke.

  'How many courtesans are there in this quarter?' asked Yaji. 'It would be fun to call them all.'

  'I'd like to give 'em all a kimono of the same pattern while I'm stopping here,' said Kita. 'Eh, Yaji?'

  'They would be very pleased,' said the waitress.

  'Has your cloak got the number ten inside?' asked one of the girls of Kita.

  'Hush!' said another girl, pulling her by the sleeve. 'Don't ask such questions.'

  Then they both started laughing, but Yaji and Kita were still quite ignorant of what they were laughing at.

  'Eh?' said Kita. 'Number ten inside? That's some trick, eh? I know your little ways. You've got a sweetheart, haven't you? a handsome fellow! Here, let's have another drink.'