by Orr, Krystal
"Y-you can not do this. Markahn will have you banished."
Lao'dahn's voice and her encounter with him sounded inside her head over and over again.
"You feel that? That is the power of Esuval, whore. It lives in us. In men! As a woman, you can not fully appreciate that power, even when we mate with you. But, I'll show you."
She remembered him rubbing his large hands over her breasts roughly and the way his erection had felt being thrust against her through her clothing. He had held her down and used her body for his own desires. She had cried and she had begged and those actions had only seemed to drive him on.
"Tah-li?" Arizira's voice came to her mind again and she blinked a few times in an effort to leave Lao'dahn and his cruel act behind. Arizira's face came into her view and she started to laugh happily upon realizing where she was and who she was with, only to have the laugh turn into a sob.
"Don't think about calling for help."
He was too close to her. She could not breathe, could not move.
"You will keep your eyes fast upon me. Do you understand?"
Over and over, his words echoed in her ears while the visions associated with those words assaulted her mind. She could remember the way he had grabbed his erection and thrust it nearly into her face. He had moved on top of her so forcefully he had caused the rocks beneath her to become buried in her back.
She had been bruised and she had bled and she had hurt and Lao'dahn had continued to abuse her.
"This is Esuval. This brings life into the world. You are only the vessel. You carry our seed. That is all."
"N-no...no...n-n-no," the words left her lips as she argued with the memory of Lao'dahn. He was too close to her. He was restricting her movements and making her feel trapped. He was too close.
He was too close. She had to get away from him. She had to get him off of her before he raped her, before he hurt her anymore. She was afraid. She could not escape him.
"Tah-li? Are you well? Failira? Focus on me."
Arizira's voice, her sweet and gentle voice, failed to reach Talliea. She was far too panicked. In her mind, the body on top of her was Lao'dahn. He was hurting her. Humiliating her. She had to fight back. She had to get away. He was too close.
He was too close.
Pushing up against the body above her own, Talliea shoved with all her might. Esu strength surged through her limbs as she, in her mind, fought off her attacker. She heard the surprised gasp that came with the action and was about to smile in triumph until she came back to herself and her surroundings.
Her dugout changed to a cave. The grunt that came to her ears was not that belonging to a man, but a woman. She was not with Lao'dahn. She was with...
Arizira.
Looking over to where she had heard the painful grunt, Talliea was horrified to notice Arizira's body huddled on the ground near the flat-faced rock she'd sat upon earlier. Her shoulders were hunched and she appeared to be unable to move.
"Ahmanae?" she ventured in a meek tone. Arizira did not respond. She continued to breathe slowly and deeply as she kept her head down. "A-Ari?" Talliea asked again, sitting up and reaching for her top. What had she done?
She had not meant to hurt Arizira and the possibility that she could have shattered her. How had matters become so twisted? How had they ended up here instead rejoicing in one another?
Lao'dahn had taken something precious away from her. From them. His actions still haunted her, Talliea came to understand, just as Arizira had said they did. Because of him and his treatment of her, she had possibly injured the person who mattered most to her. The images her mind had produced had seemed so real and vivid. She had truly believed Lao'dahn was abusing her. She had heard him. Seen him. Smelled him.
But, it had not been him. It had been Arizira. Wrapping her jerkin around her shoulders, Talliea quickly crossed the short distance that kept her from Arizira. "Ahmanae? I-I am sorry. Please, are you hurt? Did I hurt you?" she asked, bending down to inspect the suddenly small body of her love.
Arizira raised her head slowly and Talliea was stricken to see the pain coloring their depths. "It is okay, Tah-li. We should not have," she hissed in pain before repeating, "We should not have."
Talliea swallowed her guilt and closed her eyes. Arizira was correct. She had told her that she was not ready and still, Talliea had not wanted to listen. She had not entertained the possibility that Lao'dahn's attack still haunted her.
Was that it then? Was she always going to be plagued by his disrespectful act? Was she cursed, doomed to never experience another side to a person's touch? To Arizira's touch? She refused to believe that. Their encounter had come about quickly and heatedly and she had not been prepared for everything. That was all. She knew Arizira would not hurt her. She knew her touch would not--did not--bring her pain.
"Are you hurt? Can you sit up?" she asked, her voice trembling.
Arizira attempted to offer her a cocky smile, but the pain in her back turned the smile into a grimace. When Talliea had pushed her, her back had collided with the flat rock behind her and fractured one of her shoulder blades while severely bruising the other. She had felt her breath knocked from her lungs while the hard stone impacted her upper back.
Arizira could feel the warmth of her blood as it stained her jerkin and knew that the accident had broken her skin. She chastised herself for her weakness, for giving into Talliea when she had known the other woman was not ready. She had herself to thank for her current discomfort.
It had just felt so good to give into Talliea. She had felt at peace and at home and the desire to continue had been too powerful to ignore. Talliea had felt incredibly wonderful beneath her fingers. Her sounds, her reactions, her body -- they had all fascinated Arizira immensely.
She had craved more and that had been wrong. They had rushed. That, too, had been wrong. "I am okay," she lied not wanting to upset Talliea, though the weariness and strain in her voice belied the statement.
Talliea shook her head and finally noticed the red mark between Arizira's shoulder blades. That was why she would not sit up. She was unable. Tears sprang to her eyes and she felt her throat tighten in distress. "Oh, Ari. I am so sorry. Please forgive me."
Arizira nodded at her and looked up. "The fault is my own, failira. I should have stopped us. I am sorry I did not." Shaking her head, the act causing her tears to fall, Talliea placed her hand near the blood on Arizira's back. "I will take care of you. Okay? I will take care of you."
Arizira smiled and nodded before the effort to remain sitting up became too much. She allowed herself to collapse into Talliea's embrace while her pain washed over her. She felt Talliea lean over her and was reminded of the time she had found the other woman by the thermal spring so long ago.
That had been the day she discovered someone had hurt Talliea. As Talliea leaned over her and tentatively kissed the back of her neck, her last thought before the pain became too much was that Talliea was incredibly strong.
Chapter 25: Mending
Arizira groaned and attempted to roll over onto her back. Something rough stopped her as the pain between her shoulders alerted her to her position. She was on her side, facing the mouth of the cave. Talliea's blanket was draped over her chest and shoulders and she realized she was topless. Opening her eyes slowly, she tried to concentrate through the blurry images dancing in her field of vision. A steady and deep throbbing sensation was causing the space between her shoulders to feel as if it were on fire.
Any small movement she made with her arms trailed back to add to the pressure she felt behind her, and the intensity from the wound caused her eyes to water. Opening her eyes fully and allowing her surroundings to come into focus, she tried to recall her last memory.
"Ari?" Talliea's voice came to her ears before her face swam into view from above. "How do you fare, Ahmanae?"
Arizira lowered her brows and tried to recall how she had come to be half-naked next to the fire. The last thing she remembered was trying t
o calm Talliea. The Esu woman had panicked when the two of them were...
Her mind clouded over with a myriad amount of convoluted images. She remembered Talliea kissing her and asking for her touch in a raspy whisper. She remembered the way Talliea's body had felt so close to her own. She could still taste the other woman’s lips and her fingers still tingled from the smooth perfection of Talliea's skin.
She had given into her desire. That much was not lost to her. Talliea had been so lustful. Her actions had both surprised and aroused Arizira. The way Talliea had touched her. The sounds she had made...
Arizira licked her dry lips and closed her eyes as she tried to piece together the fragments of her broken memory. What had happened? Had she and Talliea bonded? If that were so, it would explain her current state of dress…or, lack thereof. She felt soft fingers brush away the hair resting on the side of her face and the action caused her to open her eyes again.
"Ari?" Talliea called.
Glancing up, Arizira winced when a sharp pain shot between her shoulders. Talliea had shoved her. She remembered now. Before the two of them could have gone any further, Talliea had panicked and, in the process, injured her. Everything came back to Arizira at once and with her memories, the pain she felt grew.
"Tah-li?" she said in a small voice tinged with pain. "I am here," Talliea responded from behind her. Struggling to turn over so that she could properly look into Talliea's face, Arizira gasped in pain when the action sent white hot tendrils of discomfort into her back.
"Do not try to move, Ahmanae. I have you on your side to keep you off of your back." Arizira swallowed the cry she could feel wishing to be free from her throat and settled down once more. Her heart was beating rather erratically and she could not remember ever feeling so restricted. She realized the rough object she had noticed earlier was one of their cloaks rolled up to keep her on her side.
Taking a deep and slow breath, she tried to calm herself and ignore the steady and frightening pain located in her upper back. "What happened?" she asked roughly.
Talliea's face contorted as she tried in vain to keep her tears from falling. Running her fingers through Arizira's fine hair, she replied, "I hurt you. I am so sorry." Arizira shook her head and let her eyes become focused on the fire dancing not far away. "It was an accident," she said quietly.
She felt Talliea lift the blanket covering her back, and a moment later fingers were brushing over the area responsible for her discomfort. Though the touch was light, her skin reacted and she jerked slightly intensifying her pain. The wound was extremely sensitive.
"I do not have any skill in healing, Ari. I washed your wound and tried to give you comfort from its pain, but I do not know how to make you whole."
Arizira's insides knotted as she listened to the sad and broken voice of her love. She could hear how lost Talliea was and it pained her to know she had suffered alone while she had slept. "Describe it to me," she said, trying to give her mind something else upon which to think.
Talliea sniffed and cleared her throat, her tears continuing to fall down her face, before looking down at Arizira's injury. "It is dark, Ari. The wound is a shadow upon your skin. It is as if your very blood cries beneath the surface. The rock scratched you when you...w-when you fell. The area is swollen. I thought to apply dohethra, but I knew not how to mix the paste."
"It will not ease this, Tah-li," Arizira interrupted. Talliea came up short with her reply and exhaled sharply. How could it not help? The mixture had eased her own pain when Arizira had applied it. It could do so again. It had to. "It can," she insisted " Just tell me how to--"
"It will not," Arizira said over her. "This is not a wound of broken flesh, Tah-li. I can not support myself or my weight. This pain restricts my movements and brings me to my knees."
Crying more profusely, but trying to hide the sounds of her sobs, Talliea wiped away at her tears and asked, "Then what am I to do?"
Arizira was quiet for a moment. She did not have any answers for Talliea. She was scared and the sensation was not pleasant. In all of her years, she had never suffered an injury so serious. In her youth, she had bruised herself during sparring sessions with other huntresses and weapons' training had brought about various cuts and whelps, but never had she broken a bone or taken a direct blow from an adversary. Her cuts and scrapes had always been minor and she had counted herself lucky for that.
This injury, however, was unlike anything she had ever felt. The pain did not remind her of a bruise. It did not remind her of anything she had experience with. Her shoulder blades felt...different. She could not move them. The pain in them was deep and heavy and sharp. She knew the cut Talliea had spoken of, the one that had caused her to bleed, was minor in comparison. Her true problem was in her bones, not her skin.
Dohethra eased pain. It did not mend shattered bones or heal broken bodies. Likely, it would alleviate some of her pain, but it would not address the true nature of her injury.
Inhaling through her nose, Arizira closed her eyes and tried to focus on something apart from the hot jabbing pain she felt. She could not tell Talliea how serious her injury was. The other woman already felt responsible, and hearing that Arizira was unable to move her shoulders would only break her heart all over again.
What scared Arizira the most was that she did not have any answers for Talliea. She did not know what to do. Her people were days away and the snows were only going to get heavier. Sed'dya would be able to help her, but reaching her was nearly impossible given her current condition.
"Tell me how to help you, Ahmanae. Please." Talliea's words were heavy and sad. Arizira knew she wished to feel useful. She knew she needed to do something. Opening her eyes, she could just barely make out Talliea's curtain of dark hair as she looked at her from over her shoulder. "Just lie with me, Tah-li. Stay behind me and brace me," she whispered.
Offering a small smile, Talliea nodded and leaned down to kiss Arizira's cheek softly. Gently removing the cloak she had rolled up to keep between them, she settled against Arizira. She replaced the wolf hide blanket over their bodies and wrapped her left arm around Arizira loosely. Talliea tried to keep from bumping her love’s shoulder blades or jostling her body too roughly. Keeping her weight braced on her right arm, she lowered her head until her lips brushed along the curve of Arizira's neck.
The hand she had around the smaller woman's waist splayed across her stomach and she could not help but enjoy the feeling of unrestricted skin on skin contact. She laid small, lazy kisses of comfort along Arizira's neck and shoulders as her tears fell down her cheeks and met the smaller woman‘s skin.
Everything would be okay. They had to be. She could not be responsible for something so tragic. What if Arizira was never able to use her bow? What if she never got the pleasure of climbing trees or running through the forest again? Could Talliea live with herself knowing she had caused the one person she loved more than anything so much pain?
She had promised herself that she would never let anything happen to Arizira. She had made a vow to protect her even at the cost of herself. Feeling Arizira tremble and shake against her as the pain washed over her body, Talliea buried her nose into silver-blonde hair and made another promise: she would do whatever it took to heal Arizira. No demand was too high.
As she held the smaller woman close to her, Talliea could feel the heat from the dark and swollen wound pressed against her chest. Again, the direct skin on skin contact brought her a small amount of joy. Her thoughts were consumed with but one overwhelming and all consuming desire: To heal her love.
"I will make you whole," she whispered against Arizira's neck, her lips pressing lightly to the soft skin found there and offering their own promises. "I will not allow you to suffer, Tahlet Vahllah. I will make you whole. I promise."
Arizira placed a hand atop of the one resting on her stomach. Squeezing Talliea's fingers in a show of reassurance, she felt the panic from before slowly begin to ebb and wane. In far too much pain to wonder at the na
ture of the calm washing over her, Arizira relaxed against Talliea as much as her injury would allow.
She could feel Talliea's heart beating against her shoulder blades as the strange serenity continued to take her over, and allowed the soothing rhythm to lull her into an easy sleep. The last thing she heard was Talliea's promise whispered again and again.
"I will make you whole. I will make you whole..."
* * * * * *
"Injured?"
The wolf gave no reply, instead choosing to sit next to the fire burning brightly before it.
"This was not spoken of," Cynra insisted, seating herself next to her four-legged fellow. The wolf looked at her, its piercing blue eyes communicating what mere words could not.
"I see," Cynra said, a tight-lipped smile gracing her mouth. "You always were a sly one. You know what will happen as well as I. You know her powers will manifest."
The wolf flattened its ears in a coyish manner before lowering itself to the ground and laying its head on its paws. Cynra chuckled and patted the space between the wolf's ears. "This is the first step upon the path?"
Again, the wolf did not respond, but Cynra continued after a moment of silence. "Then all may not yet be lost. The prophecy could manifest differently."
Looking deep into the wolf's blue eyes, the Dream Speaker wrapped her cloak tighter about herself and looked out at the coming dawn. The sky was a wondrous shade of blue and pink with only a few stars still dotting its canvas.
"She shall arrive soon," Cynra said, changing the subject. Her words were both a statement and a question. The wolf licked its jowls and inhaled deeply.
"You could offer your aid, Blessed One. The woman is old." The wolf only closed its eyes and settled itself into a more comfortable position, seemingly unaffected by Cynra's verbal jabs.
"Of course. You have matters thought out, just as you always have and used to," Cynra said, more to herself than to her companion. She looked outside the den again and let her thoughts completely occupy her mind. The game was in motion, but still it was moving much too slowly for her liking. She knew it was only a matter of days before Talliea and Arizira consummated their relationship. When that action came to pass, everything would move forward far more quickly than she could imagine.