by ID Johnson
“Cheer up! It could’ve been worse,” Elliott said, nudging her with his shoulder.
While she could definitely think of some scenarios that would’ve been worse, she was still embarrassed. “Have you ever walked into a crowded room in just your underwear?” she asked.
“Hell, no,” he said too quickly, clearly an attempt to be funny. “No, but I did walk out of a porta potty once at a Grateful Dead concert to find a crowd of people at least three deep holding their hands over their noses, just staring at me in awe and disgust.”
She began to giggle, imagining it in her head. “You did not,” she said, assuming he was just trying to make her feel better.
“True story. I’d had cheap Mexican food before an outdoor concert in the dead of August in Oklahoma. Now, people usually think of Texas or Arizona when they think hot, but don’t let the reputation fool you. Oklahoma can get hot. It was not pretty. And, little did I know, the band was taking a break, leaving the area eerily quiet. Except for my gaseous interpretation of ‘Brown Eyed Woman’ played on the ass flute.”
Cadence could no longer contain herself and burst into a fit of hysterical laughter which ultimately left her wiping tears from her eyes. “God, you’re such an idiot,” she finally got out, shoving him with her forearm hard enough to knock him against the window.
“Hey, you asked,” he replied, righting himself and rubbing his shoulder.
“Not about that,” she reminded him. “Okay, I guess it could’ve been worse.”
“Sure the hell could’ve been,” he agreed. “Besides, you look damn good in a T-shirt and skivvies. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. You own that, girl.”
“That’s a little creepy coming from you,” she giggled, “but thanks.”
“Damn straight. I’m not your real brother, you know?”
She nodded, still trying to control her laughter, thinking about how icky it would be if he was. Her sister was in love with his son after all. But he didn’t know that. Not yet. “Right,” she finally managed. “Still… yuck.”
“I love you, too,” he said, shaking his head and looking out the window.
“You know I don’t mean it like that.”
“Whatever,” he said with a fake sniffle. “I know I’ve put on a few pounds since I put myself back together again.” He was squealing by the end of the sentence like an overly emotional woman at an unsuccessful Weight Watchers meeting, and Cadence found herself shoving him once more. “You seriously need to get control of yourself, woman,” he said, rubbing his shoulder again. “You are much stronger than you think you are.”
“Sorry,” Cadence muttered, wondering if he was right or if he’d just gotten a little soft hanging out in the urn for the last several months. Before she could say anything else on the subject, she realized he was staring out the window quite contently. “What’s up?” she asked, leaning over so she could peer out, too.
“I don’t know,” he admitted, “I just don’t feel like we are going the right direction.”
“How can you tell?” she asked. The ground looked the same to her as it always did from this high up—patches of brown, patches of green, occasional body of water.
“I can’t,” he said with a shrug. “Could you call Aaron and see if he’s changed our itinerary?”
“I could,” she replied, though she was reluctant to do so. “Or we could ask the captain.”
“Or you could just ask your beloved and save us some steps and potential lies.”
“What makes you think he won’t lie?” she muttered as she sent him a message.
“Hey,” he said, his voice calmer than she’d remembered hearing it in over a week. “Change of plans.”
“Yeah, we thought maybe we were going another direction,” she said aloud, nodding at Elliott as she did so.
“We?” he asked, chiding her since he was certain she hadn’t actually noticed anything geographically speaking. He didn’t wait for her to respond. “I asked the pilot to bring you directly into Des Moines instead. I’ll meet you at your grandma’s house.”
Cadence was alarmed. “What’s going on?”
“I’m not sure,” he replied, and she believed him. “I’ve been trying to get ahold of her for a few hours and haven’t gotten a response. She didn’t tell anyone she was going anywhere, and it’s not like her not to answer.”
Cadence felt Elliott’s hand on her arm and realized he had no idea what was going on, but he could see she was concerned. “Okay,” she said. “That is odd.”
“It’s probably nothing,” Aaron attempted to assure her, but she could hear an undertone in his voice; he didn’t believe that himself.
“All right. Will you get there first?” she asked.
“Probably. I’m not sure.”
Swallowing the lump in her throat, Cadence said, “Well, let me know as soon as you get there, okay?”
“Okay,” he said, but she could tell by his response that he wasn’t planning on telling her anything bad over the IAC. “Don’t worry, Cadence. I’m sure Janette’s just out for the day… or something.”
“Right,” she said, hoping he was correct. She couldn’t imagine losing her grandmother. The idea was unthinkable. She disconnected the conversation and turned to find Elliott’s expectant eyes staring at her. “My grandma’s not answering her phone.”
“Oh,” Elliott said, his eyebrows knitting together as he dropped his eyes to his folded hands. “Well, I’m sure it’s nothing to be worried about.”
Cadence nodded, but she couldn’t find the conviction to voice an agreement. She had lost more people in the last year or so than ever before in her entire life. Through it all, it had been her grandmother’s comforting voice who had helped her keep it together. She had explained the Ternion to her. It had been in her upstairs bedroom where Cadence had Transformed, where she’d had her first meaningful conversation with Aaron. Over her Thanksgiving dinner, she’d joked with Elliott about how awful the Green Bay Packers were. As a child, she’d spent countless holidays with her family in her grandma’s living room, huddled around the fireplace, running through the back orchard chasing fireflies. The thought that all of that could be over was almost more than she could take. If it hadn’t been for Elliott’s hand in hers, reminding her that death and life were not so distant from each other after all, she might have lost it right there on the airplane before she even knew for certain something was wrong. But whether it was the power of suggestion or just a new attunement to the universe, she began to realize something had certainly shifted.
Attempting to contact Aaron once they reached the airport proved futile, and as the captain explained to Elliott that there was an SUV waiting for them just outside, Cadence numbly made her way out of the plane, still clutching her friend’s hand. If everything was okay, Aaron would’ve told her by now.
“Maybe he’s not here yet,” Elliott offered, reading her mind.
Cadence nodded as he helped her into the passenger side of a Jeep Patriot, not their typical model but one that would do in a pinch, but she could feel her stomach churning. Her grandmother’s Queen Anne was only a few minutes from the small airport they’d landed at, and Cadence was silent the entire time, Elliott’s right hand resting on her fisted left.
They pulled into the driveway, something Cadence had done thousands of times before without a thought, and she gazed up at the house. An eerie silence hung over the two-story edifice, and as she stepped out of the vehicle, a wave of sorrow hit her; it was as if the house had lost its soul. It seemed like an empty shell of a structure now.
The Lamborghini in the driveway was a good indication that Aaron was already there, and she absently wondered how long he’d been there, if he’d actually driven, why he hadn’t told her he’d arrived… and a thousand other questions that didn’t really matter.
Elliott came around the driver’s side and took her hand as she forced her feet to move toward the house. The front door creaked open, and as much as she hoped it would be t
he smiling face of her grandmother standing there, she was not surprised to see the much more serene blue eyes of her fiancé, looking at her with pity and his own grief. His hands were in his pockets and his eyes barely left the porch. The deluge of questions was pushed aside as Cadence flung herself over the steps and into his arms. None of their bickering mattered now as he enveloped her in his protective embrace.
Cadence could have stood wrapped in his arms for days, avoiding the inevitable question she had to ask and feeling like nothing in the world could harm her there, but after a few moments, she pulled herself back far enough to look up at him. “Is… is she gone?” she asked, just above a whisper.
Aaron nodded, and she could no longer hold back her tears, burying her head in his shoulder once again. A barrage of memories came rushing at her all at once, snapshots in time, scents that would forever remind her of a woman who loved everyone and never hesitated for a moment to do whatever she could to help anyone. Cadence struggled to pull herself together, realizing that she needed to find out what had happened, but each time she attempted to catch her breath, she felt her body spasm with another fit of tears, and if it weren’t for Aaron’s even breathing and the feel of his hand stroking her hair, she was certain her knees would buckle.
After a few minutes, she realized he was whispering in her ear, and she tried to still herself enough to comprehend what he was saying. “It’s okay, sweetheart. It really is. She lived a very long, happy life. She wanted to go. She’s with your grandpa now.”
She knew each statement was true, but somehow that didn’t help ease the pain of knowing she’d never see her grandmother’s smiling face again. If she hadn’t suddenly remembered Elliott was standing behind her and Aaron hadn’t seen him in months, she may have stood there and sobbed all day, but the realization that she was being selfish was enough to cause her to regain some composure, at least for the time being. Taking a deep breath and wiping her eyes, she stepped back. “Aaron, Elliott. Elliott, Aaron,” she said gesturing as if they had never met each other before.
Both of them managed a chuckle, and as they stepped around her to embrace, Elliott said, “Hey boss man. Good to see you.”
“Likewise,” Aaron said as he clapped his best friend of many years on the shoulder. “Great to have you back.”
If either of them felt any explanation of Aaron’s absence the night before was necessary, they didn’t go into it right then, and Cadence wondered if maybe they’d talked about that on the phone the night before. As Aaron gently took hold of both of her shoulders and peered into her face expectantly, she took a deep breath and asked, “So where is she? Is she inside?” While she couldn’t imagine what it might be like to look at her grandmother’s lifeless body, she also knew it was best to face these things head on. Unfortunately, too much experience with death had taught her it is always best to see the body.
“I told you, she’s gone,” Aaron repeated, his voice soft and soothing. “She’s literally gone, Cadence.”
“What do you mean?” Cadence asked, looking at him out of the corner of her eye.
Brushing her hair back over her shoulder and softly stroking her cheek he clarified. “Cadence, your grandma went through the portal.”
Chapter Seventeen
Staring into the familiar eyes of her fiancé, Cadence could hardly believe what she was hearing. “What?” she asked, clutching both of his arms. “What do you mean she went through the portal?”
“She left a letter,” he explained, his voice just as calm and serene as always. He slid his hands down her arms, and taking her hands in his, he continued. “Come on. I’ll show you.”
Following him into her grandmother’s living room, Cadence caught herself looking expectantly at her grandma’s favorite spot on the couch, which was empty. Aaron still held her hand, and he led her slowly over to the desk next to the large bay window that faced the side yard.
There, her eyes fell on a sheet of stationery with her grandma’s initials at the top. The handwriting was absolutely recognizable, and as Cadence picked it up off of the desk, her hands were shaking and her knees felt weak. Aaron’s hand on her shoulder was reassuring, but it was all she could do to hold back the tears as she began to read.
Dear Family,
I’m not exactly sure who might find this letter, though if I had to guess, I would say Aaron will come looking for me first. Always on top of things, that one!
Please forgive me for not letting any of you know my intentions ahead of time. If my plan has worked and I am gone, then you will understand why I did not speak of it before. I am of the belief that, if I were to let any of you know what I am about to do, you would try to stop me, and I am of a mind not to be stopped.
As you may have noticed, my health is beginning to fail. I am an old, old granny. While I love all of you very much, I know that my time on this earth is rapidly drawing to an end. Also, I miss Jordan beyond words. Others have said that the pain lessens with time, but I have not found that to be true. How I long to be with him again! And while I could find myself contented to sit here and wait my time, is there any promise that I will be reunited with him immediately? I fear not. Nor do I welcome death. For ages, I have stared death in the face and been the cause of sending many a foe to the otherworld. Now, faced with the prospect of suffering a heart attack or some other such calamity, I am afraid my courage has all but evaporated. No, this granny is content to go to the other side on her own terms.
And that is why I have decided to step into the next world right alongside the man I’ve loved for well over a century. When the portal opens, my plan is to cross over and join Jordan on the other side. While I am not exactly sure how this might work, I am willing to be the test factor and find out. (I’m sure Jamie and Christian will appreciate the research!) I know this may be quite troubling to some of you, especially my dear Cadence and Cassidy, along with your cousins Jacob and Ella. But do not be sad, little ones. Grandma is in a happier place, of that you can be sure.
I must say how proud I am of all of you. Lorraine and Eli, you have been such wonderful children to me. The idea that I might outlive the pair of you as I have your older siblings is unthinkable to me. I have loved Ralph and Liz as if they were my own; you have both chosen wonderful spouses. My grandchildren have made me nothing but delighted. My entire LIGHTS family has continued to impress me with their hard work, dedication, and perseverance has made this old lady proud. Hold steadfast and never waver; there is nothing we cannot overcome if we do not fail to stand together!
Please remember, I will always love each of you. Please save your tears. There is no more sorrow, no more pain. I will always be with you.
All my love,
Janette
PS Cadence, if your plan has also been successful, don’t forget what I told you last week, and give Elliott a hug for me. Love, Granny
Despite her grandmother’s wishes, Cadence desperately swiped at her tears to keep them from soiling the letter. She read it through twice and then, carefully handing it back to Aaron, she followed her grandmother’s instructions and wrapped her arms around Elliott’s neck.
“It’s okay, kid,” he said as he rubbed her back. “She really is in a better place. Trust me, I know.”
Cadence did her best to regain her composure, and after a few minutes of focusing on what Elliott had just said—that her grandmother truly was in paradise now—she was able to stop her tears at least temporarily. She let go of her friend, and stepping back, wiped her eyes on the sleeves of her jacket.
“Are you okay?” Aaron asked as he handed her a tissue.
Cadence nodded as she dried her tears. She remembered the first time she’d truly spoken to him, in her bedroom after the Eidolon Festival. She’d cried on his shoulder then as well, which was followed by her messy attempt to clean her tears off of his leather jacket with a wad of ineffective tissues. “I’ll be okay,” she finally managed to get out between shaky breaths.
“Why don’t I go check out
the back yard?” Elliott suggested.
Aaron nodded at him and led Cadence over to the couch where she took the same spot she’d sat in only the week before when her grandmother had showed her the photo album and she’d found Elliott’s letter. “Do you want some water?” he asked, sitting down next to her on the edge of the sofa.
Cadence only managed a slight nod, and he kissed her softly on the top of the head before heading off to the kitchen. She heard the back door open and wondered if that was Elliott coming in or going out. While she hadn’t heard it open earlier, she may have just missed it. When she heard him say, “Hey boss man, you need to check this out,” she knew he must have already found something out back and was coming in to get Aaron.
“Just a second,” she heard Aaron reply, and a half a moment later, he was back next to her, a glass of water in his hand. “Here you go,” he said softly, handing it to her.
“Thank you,” Cadence said, attempting to take it. Her hands were still shaky, and when he didn’t let go, she was thankful. She managed to take a sip and then let him set it on the table next to the arm of the sofa.
“Will you be all right if I go outside with Elliott for a minute?” he asked, resuming his spot next to her on the couch, his arm around her.
“Yeah, I think so,” Cadence managed, and he kissed her again, this time on the temple, before brushing her hair back and disappearing through the doorway that led to the kitchen and the back yard.
Cadence was left all alone in her grandma’s big house with only her memories and shadows of the past to keep her company. She felt the tears coming again, wondering why the universe wouldn’t even give her a day’s worth of happiness before plunging her back into despair again, but as much as her insides ached at the loss of her grandmother, all she could really think about was how she was going to tell her little sister that she’d lost yet another loved one. The last time had been so unbelievably difficult, she’d hoped she’d never have to do it again. This time would be even worse because, in addition to telling Cassidy their grandmother was gone, she’d also have to tell her father that his mom had disappeared into the night through a portal to another dimension. For a moment, she wished that her life could just go back to the way that it was before Vampires, before hunts, before death and destruction. How much more of this could she take?