“What I have to say now is very private, but I trust your discretion.” Darcy paused, and Georgiana looked at him expectantly. “During my last visit at the Tildens, Mr. Tilden drew me into his study to discuss his daughter.”
“What did he say?”
“He told me about Miss Tilden’s dowry of twenty five thousand pounds and wanted me to understand that he would approve of a marriage between us. He told me he wanted a good match for his daughter and that he would add an additional ten thousand pounds to insure success. Georgiana, he was trying to bribe me into marrying his daughter.”
“Does Miss Tilden know this?”
“I am certain she had no idea of what we were speaking, but I would suppose that she is aware that her father will do anything he can to secure a match for her. I cannot tell you how disgusted I was. Had I ever felt any inclination for Miss Tilden, I am certain I would no longer. I want you to know that I will never do anything like that to you.”
“I will remember your advice, and I shall take pity on poor Miss Tilden. I assume she will not be allowed to make her own decisions regarding her future. Thank you for allowing me the opportunity to make mine. I suppose that makes a woman like Miss Bennet very fortunate.”
“In what way?”
“Without a dowry, she must know that the man who would propose marriage to her must truly love her.”
* * * * *
MR. GRINLY WAS WORRIED AS he paced in the drawing room. A servant told him that Miss Bennet left the house early on foot, though he did not know where she went. Now it was the afternoon, and she was not back, yet her family did not seem to be concerned about her. The behavior of Miss Bennet compared to that of her younger sisters, and even her mother, was very different. He suspected that the gulf in thoughtfulness and consideration was just as great. They seemed oblivious of her absence. He did not know whether it was appropriate for him to speak to Mrs. Bennet about it. To own the truth, he had hoped to talk with Miss Bennet today and hear her answer to his proposal, but that could wait. As long as she was safe, there would be plenty of time for talking.
He took his place in a chair by a window that overlooked the paddock. Satisfying himself that there was no one out front, he resumed his book and resolved to be calm. Breaking his resolution ten times in as many minutes, he was still surprised when a lone rider approached the house. The man was a liveried servant carrying a letter. Mr. Grinly heard a knock, a brief conversation, and then the man mounted his horse and rode off. Having worked himself into a near panic, he resolved to speak with Mrs. Bennet immediately, but before he could remove from his chair, Mrs. Bennet herself entered the room.
“Mr. Grinly, I am so sorry. I am certain . . . at least . . . well, perhaps you have been waiting for Elizabeth. She spent the morning with Jane at Netherfield. A servant just came to inform me that she has fallen ill and will not return until tomorrow.”
“I hope she is not seriously ill.”
“There was no mention of it. I suspect she just wanted to spend some time with Jane, that is all.”
“But would she not have said that in her note?”
“I see that you do not know Elizabeth well at all.” He detected resentment in her voice. “She walks here and there and goes running off for the longest time. Why, before Jane was married, she spent two weeks at Netherfield after falling and striking her head on a rock. I told her that she should be careful, but she never listens to me. I told her she must not behave so recklessly if she wants a man to like her well enough to marry her. She must —”
“Mrs. Bennet,” interrupted Mr. Grinly, who had difficulty in hiding his displeasure. “Miss Bennet is a lovely young woman, and I am certain she will have no trouble in attaching any young man in whom she should take an interest.”
“You are very kind, sir. Perhaps if you read the letter yourself, you will be at ease and not worry over Elizabeth.” She handed him the note and walked off. He found that it reported just what Mrs. Bennet had said. Returning to his chair, he wondered how a mother could say such things about her own daughter.
Mr. Grinly again opened his book, but could not concentrate. He was not satisfied that there was not something seriously wrong with Miss Bennet. He did take comfort that she was with her sister and only hoped that he was not the cause of her distress.
* * * * *
AFTER DISPATCHING THE NOTE TO Longbourn that announced Elizabeth’s indisposition, Jane returned to her bedside. She was in agony over the words she had used with Elizabeth. In her effort to crush Elizabeth’s hopes for a marriage with Mr. Darcy, she had seriously shaken Elizabeth’s spirits. To comfort her, Jane climbed onto the bed next to her as she used to when they were children.
“I am so sorry. Please forgive me,” Jane whispered. “I only want the best for you, and now I have distressed you.” Jane caressed Elizabeth’s cheek and brushed her fingers through her hair.
Elizabeth did not immediately respond, but felt her strength return as she was comforted by the affection and love of her dearest sister. At length, she spoke. “Perhaps I should marry Mr. Grinly. I know he is fond of me. He is a kind man, and possibly, we could be happy together. I wish I loved him more and Mr. Darcy less.”
* * * * *
“FATHER, WHERE IS ELIZABETH? HAS she returned?”
Mr. Grinly was convinced that Elizabeth’s absence was directly related to his proposal. Why else would she go to Netherfield so unexpectedly? He saw the look of worry in Constance’s eyes. “Mrs. Bennet received a note from Mrs. Bingley a short while ago. Miss Bennet went to Netherfield this morning and has fallen ill and will not be returning today.”
“Is she going to be well?
“I know that Mrs. Bingley will do everything in her power to insure her sister’s health and happiness.” Mr. Grinly sat down on the sofa and took Constance’s hand as she sat down with him. “I hope this has nothing to do with me. I hope that my proposal has not distressed her.”
“Perhaps she needs this time away from us to make a decision. I cannot imagine that she would not love you.”
* * * * *
London
Dear Bingley,
I hope you are happy and well. I have no doubt that you are. I confess that I am distressed because I have not heard from you. Perhaps my last post was misdirected. I rather believe, though, that you have chosen to ignore it. I cannot blame you. It is my fault that a breach has arisen between us, and I deeply regret it. It is painful to me in every way.
I admire your strength of character. You withstood all my attacks and did what you knew to be right. Miss Bennet is very fortunate to have gained the love of such an honorable man as you and I apologize for my interference. What I thought was right for you was only my own selfishness. There is not a kinder and gentler woman than Miss Bennet, and your marriage to her will bring you the highest degree of satisfaction and pleasure. You are married now. I should call her Mrs. Bingley.
I know our friendship is ruined, and I am sorry for it. I promise I will never fail you again should you ever decide to renew our acquaintance.
Sincerely,
F. Darcy
* * * * *
A SHAFT OF LIGHT PEEKING through a gap in the curtains announced to Elizabeth that a new day had begun, a day that had arrived too quickly. Jane had stayed with Elizabeth for a large part of the night, and she had slept well, but was now faced the prospect of discussing her future with Mr. Grinly. What that future should be she hardly knew. All that she could say with certainty was that she was completely bewildered.
After a late breakfast and exhausting every excuse she could think of to delay the inevitable, Elizabeth declared that she must return home. Jane insisted that she use her carriage. “I will come with you if you would like. I know the others cannot give you much comfort.”
“No. I can see no reason to take you from your dear husband. If Mr. Grinly truly cares for me, he will wait for his answer until I am ready to give it.”
“Whatever your decision, I wil
l support you in it. Whenever you wish to come to Netherfield, allow me to send the carriage for you. Please do not ever feel that you must walk.”
“To make you happy, I will. Goodbye, Jane.” Elizabeth smiled a farewell while Mr. Bingley handed her into the carriage.
* * * * *
THE RIDE BACK TO LONGBOURN passed quickly for Elizabeth. Alone with her thoughts, she was able to compose herself. She reviewed her conversation with Jane, who had told her that Mr. Darcy was not worthy of her love, that he had rejected her, and that she owed him nothing. She advised her to forget him and not spurn the offer of a good man with whom the future would be bright and with whom love would surely grow out of mutual respect and esteem. As Elizabeth approached Longbourn, she felt surrounded by a feeling of peace.
She arrived home to a quiet house. Mrs. Bennet, Kitty and Lydia had all gone into Meryton. As Elizabeth was passing through the hall, Constance happened upon her.
“Elizabeth! You have returned!” Elizabeth could see tears well up in her eyes and reached out to embrace her. “We were all so worried about you! Will you not tell me what happened?”
Elizabeth had just a moment to reflect on the irony of a comparative stranger welcoming her home with more enthusiasm than she could expect to receive from her own family. This thought brought Elizabeth both pleasure and pain as she remembered whose daughter Constance was and what Elizabeth could expect from her in the future — if there was a future.
“I am sorry. I did not mean to alarm anyone. I am well enough now. How are you?”
“Relieved that you are back. My father has been very concerned since the night you did not come down to dinner.”
Elizabeth could make no response, and the serenity she had achieved on the ride to Longbourn quickly faded into confusion.
Constance observed Elizabeth’s change of countenance and led the conversation in another direction. “I must say it has been quiet here without you.”
“Quiet? In this house?” laughed Elizabeth.
“Well, you are right. It is much noisier than Sappingford.”
“It must be very lonely for you there.”
“It is, some of the time, but it would be so much happier there if you . . . ” Constance covered her mouth with her fingers. She was about to bolt from the room when Elizabeth gently held her arm.
“Constance, please do not go. Come and sit with me.”
Constance allowed Elizabeth to guide her to a sofa where they sat together and were silent while Elizabeth determined what should be said. “Your father told you about his proposal of marriage, did he not?”
“Are you angry that I know?”
“Of course not. You have had him all to yourself for a long time. Your father is very wise to have spoken to you about me. It concerns you almost as much as it does me, really. If I were to marry your father, it would mean many changes for you.”
“I am ready to share him, Elizabeth. He told me that you have not given him an answer yet and that he asked you to wait before you do.”
“That is true.”
“Is that why you left yesterday and did not come back? Did he distress you?”
“He did not make me angry, but I was very upset. His proposal was . . . It was so unexpected. All evening my mind was in turmoil. I did not know what to say to him. The next morning, I rose early after a sleepless night and walked to Netherfield to see my sister. The prospect of facing your father was daunting to me. I was so distraught that I made myself ill. Rather than send me back to Longbourn, Jane asked me to stay with her.”
“Why were you so upset?”
“I recently met a man who I believed loved me, and I loved him, but he disappointed me, hurt my sister, and betrayed his best friend. He has not come back, nor do I expect to see him again. Last night, Jane persuaded me to believe that he was gone forever, and it was difficult for me to accept that.”
“Do you still love him?” That Elizabeth’s heart might be engaged elsewhere was something Constance had not considered.
“I do not know anymore.”
“Does that mean you cannot love my father?”
“No. It does not mean that at all.”
“My father was distressed yesterday when you did not come back. He sat by the window, waiting for your return. When the servant came with the note from Mrs. Bingley, he was relieved that you were with your sister, but was further pained. He was convinced that his proposal was the reason you did not come back. It appears that he was correct.”
“I did not mean to hurt anyone and especially not your father. He is a good man. You are so lucky to have him.”
“He is a good man, Elizabeth, and he will love you and care for you the way you deserve. You will be happy at Sappingford. My father and I do not want to change you, just love you and join our lives with yours.
“I have much to learn, and if I had my choice, I would learn it from you. I admire your cheerfulness and your smile. You cannot imagine how grateful I am for the kindness you have shown me. I never learned to do needlework until you taught me. I do not know how to play the pianoforte. We have one at home that my father says is very fine. You could teach me, and we could play together, and I will show you how to draw.”
“Oh, Constance!”
“If I can love you for all these things as your friend, imagine how much my father will love you as your husband. I know that Wiltshire is a long way from Hertfordshire, but I am sure we can travel here often and invite your family to Sappingford. We want to share your life, not take it away from you.”
Elizabeth could see that Constance spoke with all the sincerity of an honest heart. As the idea of a closer connection between them unfolded, she knew she would welcome this relationship. “I am concerned because your father is so much older than I am, and I am only six years older than you. Would he begin to treat me as a daughter and not a wife? Would I want to treat him as a father? I feel daunted at the responsibility of helping to raise a young lady of fourteen. I feel I have nothing that I can teach you.”
“My father loves you. He is older than you, but not so much older that your relationship with him would ever change. I do not want you to be my mother. That is not what I need. I need a friend who will love me even when I am angry and upset, who will be patient as I continue to mature, and who will be my confidante after I come out and am introduced to young men. I need someone who can teach me how to love, and that will happen by example, by the way you love my father and he loves you.”
“Your view of our life together is a happy one, to be sure. Do you think it would really be true? Does he really love me enough to put up with my moods and impertinence?”
“He would put up with anything to have you, but from what I know of you, there would be very little to ‘put up with,’ as you say, and very much to love.”
Elizabeth suddenly felt confined and uncomfortable. “This is all so new, and I do not know that I love him. I do not think that it would be fair to marry him if I do not.”
“He told me that he knows he is not what you expected in a husband. That is why he did not want your answer right away, so that you would have a chance to think about it. If you do not love him now, could you?”
“He is a good man. He has not told me if he loves me, but I believe he might.”
“He does. I know he does.”
“What will be our plans, if I were to accept your father?”
“He knows that you want to be married from Longbourn Church with all your friends and family. After the wedding, I will stay here while you and Father tour for as long as you want. Then you will return for me for our trip to Sappingford and your new home.”
“It all sounds very nice, Constance.”
At that moment, Mr. Grinly came into the drawing room. “Am I intruding?” He was surprised to see Elizabeth, but did not let the emotion show on his face.
“No, Father, please come in. I was just leaving. Why do you not entertain Elizabeth while I ask Mary to play the pianoforte for m
e?”
* * * * *
ELIZABETH AND MR. GRINLY REMAINED silent until Constance left the room. When he was certain they were alone, he took a few steps towards Elizabeth, but stopped in unspoken acknowledgement of the turmoil he saw in her eyes. “I am pleased to know that you are well and have returned home. I feared that I was responsible for your indisposition. My only consolation was that you were with your sister.”
“Please forgive me for making you uneasy. Please —”
“Elizabeth.” She turned away from him at the sound of her name. “To be honest, I was surprised at the indifference of your family regarding your absence.”
“I am sure they mean well.”
Elizabeth hesitated. Was now the time to talk with him? They were alone, to be sure. Her mother and sisters were away. Constance had left and Elizabeth knew she would not be seen again until sought by her father. Elizabeth could hear the sound of Mary’s instrument and knew she would not be a disruption. There would be no better time.
“Would you care to sit with me?”
He sat down next to her and began to hope. If she were bent on rejecting him, she would not allow him to be in such close proximity.
Elizabeth closed her eyes and chased away her anxiety. “Sir, I have given much thought to your proposal.” She stood and walked away from him towards a window. “I had to leave. I had to speak with Jane. I did not know what to do or how to answer you, and during my conversations with her, I became very distraught, and she insisted that I remain at Netherfield for the night. I am sorry to have worried you, though I must say I am gratified at the same time. I take pleasure in knowing that somebody cares about me.”
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