by Katie Ford
“Please, Dane,” I whisper to the phone and hold it close to my lips. “Please, I love you.”
When the phone doesn’t magically vibrate in my hand, a new feeling settles over me. It’s hot and unbridled – the kind of thing that I’m not used to feeling.
Anger.
Anyone with half a brain could figure out that it was me who reported my father. After all, besides my mother, there was no one else with access to his office.
It was actually pretty easy. All I had to do was wait and watch my father locking up his office from the closet. The passcode was only four numbers.
Anyone could have done it.
So, why hasn’t Dane figured it out yet?
The next few days pass in a haze. The morning after my father’s arrest, a uniformed officer comes to our door with horrifying news.
“Mr. Carter had this house mortgaged up to the eyeteeth, ma’am,” the cop tells my mother with a grim expression. “And unless you’re able to come up with the capital, I’m afraid we have no choice but to evict you.”
My mother’s eyes roll back in her head and for a terrible moment, I think she’s going to faint. She steadies herself with a hand on the bannister and turns to me with a hateful gleam in her eye before replying.
“I’m sure we’ll manage,” she says icily. “Won’t we, Allie?”
The guilt burns like a branding iron and all I can do is nod miserably.
As soon as the cop leaves, my mother turns to me. For once in the past twenty-four hours, she looks calm and serene.
“You’re an adult,” she says quietly.
“Yes.” I lick my lips and give a nervous toss of my head. “I am.”
“Well, adults live on their own,” Mom continues. “So, I don’t care where you go, but neither of us are welcome here any longer.”
I blink at her. “You mean...I can’t come with you?”
My mother laughs coldly. “No,” she replies. “You made your bed, and now you’re going to lie in it.”
I nod numbly. “Okay.” It’s lame, but it’s all I can say. “I understand.”
“You’d better pack,” she adds sarcastically. “I’m sure those vultures can’t wait for us to get out of here.”
As soon as she leaves the room, I feel like I’m going to start crying again. I can’t believe it – I had no idea this would happen. And judging by my mother’s reaction, I can tell that she wasn’t clued in to my father’s activities.
That night, Mara picks me up. I toss my black TUMI duffel into the backseat of her car and climb into the passenger seat.
“Is that all you’re bringing?” Mara squints. “You know you can stay with me for however long you need, until you find a place.”
I grimace. “I was hoping that I could, you know, actually move in and be your roommate. It doesn’t look like my mom wants anything to do with me.”
To my surprise, Mara squeals and throws her arms around me. “Oh, Allie! Really?”
I nod. Her display of emotion has caught me off guard and grateful tears well up in my eyes. I may not have anyone else in the world, but at least I’ll always have Mara.
When Mara pulls away, she gives me a sympathetic smile. “I never thought you’d want to live in a dump like my apartment,” she says. “I know you were used to the high life here.”
I roll my eyes. “So much for that,” I reply. “I’m pretty sure it was all a sham. My father has millions of dollars in debt.”
Mara’s smile fades. “What about your mom?”
It hurts, but I shrug. “She went to live with her cousin Tiffany in New Canaan.”
Mara snorts. “She’ll fit right in.”
I burst into giggles. “Yeah,” I agree. “She will.”
Mara drives us back to her apartment and helps me lug my bag up four flights of stairs. I only took my favorite stuff from my room – a few outfits, including that black silk dress I wore the night Dane popped my cherry. My laptop, my textbooks, and a bag of makeup.
That’s my life now – broken and compact enough to fit in an overpriced duffle bag.
We order pizza for dinner and as we kick back to a marathon of Vanderpump Rules, I can’t shake the feeling that something is missing. I know I should be happy.
I’m finally a normal college girl, sharing an apartment with her best friend and a few roaches.
So why do I feel so empty?
“Has Dane called you?” Mara turns to face me.
“No,” I say sourly. “I thought he would be in touch as soon as my father was arrested.”
Mara pats my shoulder. “You’ll hear from him soon,” she says softly. “I just have a feeling about it.”
“He doesn’t want anything to do with me,” I reply. “He’s made that clear. He just wanted to use me for sex.”
“Allie, he’s a busy guy,” Mara says patiently. “I mean, he can’t just drop everything to call some college girl. This whole thing with your dad’s arrest probably has him working even more than he was before. I heard something like Lockdown has to do two press releases every day now!”
Her words sting, even though I know she meant them to be kind. She’s right, after all. I’m nothing but an ordinary college girl.
And Dane is CEO of one of the wealthiest companies in the world.
“You’re right.” I look down at my hands in my lap, unable to meet Mara’s gaze. “He doesn’t want anything to do with me.”
“Allie, come on,” Mara pleads. “I never said that! But it’s been what? Like, a week?”
“A phone call only takes sixty seconds,” I reply tartly. When Mara’s eyebrows go up, I sigh and blush. “I’m sorry,” I say quickly. “You’re right. Let’s just drop the subject, okay?”
Mara nods and pushes the pizza box towards me. “Last slice of pepperoni is yours,” she says.
I smile reluctantly. “Thanks,” I say. “You’re a really great friend. You know that, right?”
Mara smirks. “Duh.”
We both collapse into laughter, but the memory of Dane is still burning bright in my mind. I have a feeling that no matter what happens in my life now, I’ll never be able to forget him.
On Monday, I take the subway to Tate for the very first time. The train is jam-packed with commuters and other kids, all doused in their own personal scent. I know it makes me sound spoiled, but I have no idea how people can stomach having their personal space invaded every day. Before now, I’ve only taken the subway for the occasional trip.
But this is my life now and I have to make the most of it.
After my first class, Mara joins me in the student union for lunch. We order chicken quesadillas from my favorite snack bar and curl up on a giant couch with chips and salsa.
“How was your morning, roomie?” Mara asks teasingly.
“I’m so tired,” I moan, rubbing my eyes with both hands balled into fists. “I feel like I didn’t sleep at all.”
“Poor baby,” Mara says. “How much time do you...”
“What?” I ask as I narrow my eyes. “What were you going to say?”
Mara’s cheeks blush red and she shakes her head. “Nothing,” she says quickly. “I meant, how much time do you have until your next class?”
“You’re not even looking at me,” I reply. “What, is our food ready?”
“No,” Mara says quietly. “It’s Dane.”
Gasping, I whirl around. I leap up from the couch and gaze around with hawk eyes, searching the crowd of college kids for Dane’s sexy figure.
“I don’t see him,” I say in a panic. “Where is he?”
Mara points to the muted television mounted in the corner. “There,” she says softly. “He’s giving a press conference.”
I don’t think I’ve ever moved as fast in my life as I move right then. I dart across the room and eagerly jam my finger against the volume button on the side of the TV.
Dane’s booming voice fills my ears and my throat tightens with desire and pain as he speaks to the camera. His bl
ue eyes are dark and flashing and the cut of his black suit shows off his perfectly muscled body.
“Mr. Andersen, what can you tell us about the future?”
Dane looks directly into the camera and a shiver runs down my spine. I know it’s crazy, but it seems like he’s speaking to me intimately.
“I can’t say for sure, John, but I know they’ll include big changes at Lockdown. I hope to expand our international presence.”
Mara finally catches up with me and grabs my shoulder. “Allie, our food is ready. They just called your name.”
I don’t move. It’s impossible to tear my gaze away from Dane’s televised hotness.
“Allie, don’t worry about him,” Mara pleads. “Come on, let’s eat.”
I force myself to look away from Dane and face my best friend. “For once in my life, I’m honestly not hungry,” I say. “Mara, I have one chance left. I have to go to him. I have to tell him how I feel.”
I expect Mara to challenge me, but instead there’s a strange look in her eyes.
“Allie, you really are growing up,” she says. “But don’t you want to wait until after class?”
I shake my head. “No. I have to go now. If I don’t, I’ll lose my nerve.”
Mara nods. She looks nervous and excited – if she looks like that, I’m sure I look like a complete mess!
I take a deep breath. “I’ll call you later,” I say.
Mara pulls me into a deep hug. “Good luck,” she says. “Not because I think you’ll need it, but just because you’re my best friend and I care.”
Leaving campus, I expect to feel anxious and scared. Strangely, though, I feel as light as I’ve ever felt. By the time I descend into the subway, there’s a huge grin on my face.
I may have wasted a lot of time in my life, but I’m sure as heck not going to waste this chance.
Chapter Eighteen
Dane
The press conference leaves me exhausted and wrung out.
They all do.
Ever since James Carter was arrested, my life has been one never-ending press conference.
I’ve had to resort to traveling around the city in a giant pair of aviator shades just to stay out of sight. There are always hungry reporters outside of Lockdown now, milling around like bugs that I want to crush beneath my Ferragamo loafers.
I almost wish that he hadn’t been arrested.
At least then, I wouldn’t be tortured by thoughts of Allie. Knowing that her father is gone makes it worse than ever. She’s so close to me and yet so far at the same time.
But I have to stay away from her. I’ve already done too much. I can’t ruin an innocent girl’s life with my sadistic perversions.
No, Allie has to grow up and find someone who will worship every robust curve of her soft body.
“Mr. Andersen?”
Lea’s timid voice brings me back to reality and I sigh as I turn around to face her. She’s standing in the doorway to my office, wearing an unflattering suit and a fearful expression.
“What?”
“Hanson is downstairs for you,” she says. “You’re taking the afternoon off, remember? The real estate agent is coming by to appraise your condo and I’ve arranged for you to meet with her in half an hour.”
“Fuck,” I mutter under my breath. “All of this shit made me forget.”
“I’m sure you can make it if you leave quickly,” Lea says hopefully. She holds out my briefcase.
After a second, I snatch it from her. The last thing I want to do is spend an hour with a real estate agent – somehow, they’re the only professionals more annoying than lawyers – but I don’t have a choice.
I’ve decided to move out of the city. Realistically, the attention from James isn’t going to die down until after his trial, and his lawyer is good enough to push that back as long as he can. I’m sick of dealing with greedy assholes outside of my building who think it’s their God-given right to shove a lens in my face.
I haven’t decided where to go yet. A total change of pace would be nice. I’ve been in the city for almost twenty years.
After donning my coat and giant sunglasses, I head down to the parking garage. Hanson is waiting right by the door with the Town Car and I crawl into the back without greeting him.
As he drives me home, I close my eyes and sink into the soft leather seat. For one of the first times in my life, I feel truly old. I should feel triumphant and happy, but instead I feel like crawling into a cave and sleeping for a thousand years.
God, what happened to me? When did I lose my lust for life?
Inside, I know the answer. Ever since Allie left with tears in her eyes on that morning, I’ve been a soulless husk of a man. It doesn’t even matter that James will never threaten me again.
“Sir, would you like me to stop anywhere on the way home?” Hanson’s voice crackles through the speaker.
“No, thank you.”
“We’ll be passing by Tate University in a moment and I remembered that Miss Allie happens to attend.”
A chill settles over me and I want to reach through the divider and choke Hanson until he’s blue in the face.
“Don’t presume to know what I want,” I growl. “Take me home. Now.”
“Yes, sir,” Hanson replies.
Then the speaker goes silent. I groan and reach into the small drink cupboard. No champagne today.
Today calls for something a lot stronger.
By the time I’m riding the elevator up to my penthouse, I’m two whiskeys deep and feeling worse than ever. I want nothing more than a long, hot shower and an uninterrupted stretch of sleep.
I’ve barely had time to kick off my loafers and drop my briefcase on the floor when I hear a knock at the door.
“Fucking great,” I mutter. If it’s Hanson with another misguided piece of advice, I’m going to fire him on the spot.
Wrapping my hand around the doorknob, I yank the door open and cross my arms over my chest in anticipation of a stand-off.
When I see who’s there, my jaw drops.
“How could you?” Allie cries loudly. Her cheeks were flaming pink. She leaps into the foyer and begins pounding my chest with diminutive fists. It doesn’t hurt, but I grab her wrists and hold her arms locked in place.
“Allie, we shouldn’t be together,” I say firmly. Just seeing her is making my resolve disappear, but I vow to hold everything tightly inside. “And I think you should leave.”
“Why?” Allie demands.
“Because you’re much too young for me,” I say. “And you could give someone the world. I don’t deserve that, Allie. You should be with someone your own age.”
“I don’t want someone my own age!” Allie yells with surprising force. “I love you, don’t you know that?”
I stare at her. In a pair of loose jeans and a flowery top, she looks as beautiful as I’ve ever seen her. Her brown curls are tumbling free over her shoulders and there is a haughty, confident look in her eyes that I’ve never seen before.
“I love you,” Allie repeats. “And I’m not going to let you push me away.”
It’s too much to resist. With Allie’s lush curves laid out before me like a delicious buffet, I know I don’t stand a chance at telling her no. Before I can even think about what I’m doing, I grab her and pull her close.
Allie melts in my arms. She wraps her arms around my neck and presses her mouth to mine in a frantic, passionate kiss. As her tongue snakes into my mouth, my cock stiffens in my pants and I grunt with lust.
“Dane,” Allie cries in my ear. She nips at my earlobe, trailing her petal-soft lips down my neck. Shivers of desire run down my spine and I squeeze her soft ass in my hands, delighting when she squirms and moans. Her body seems even bigger than before, and I can’t wait to explore every inch of her ripe curves.
“I missed you so fucking much,” I growl into her ear before biting down on her neck. Allie squeals in pain, arching her back and offering herself for more. Hot lust pumps through
my veins and suddenly, I feel as energized and powerful as a stallion.
Bending down, I slide one arm under Allie’s knees and pick her up effortlessly. I carry her into the bedroom and drop her on the bed before slapping the inside of her thigh. Allie flushes and gasps as she spreads her legs. I crawl between them and crush Allie into the mattress as I kiss her deeply.
Through the material of her jeans, I can feel Allie’s hot pussy throbbing for me.
“I know you’ve been missing this,” I growl as I grab her hand and press it to the bulge of my erection.
Allie’s eyes go wide and she nods, biting her lip and looking insanely desirable. Her brown curls are spread over the white pillows of my bed and I shudder with an animalistic grunt. We lock eyes and Allie flushes deeply as she lifts her shirt over her head and throws it to the side.
She’s wearing an emerald silk bra that shows off her creamy tits, and I plunge my face into her cleavage and begin to suck and lick. Allie moans hotly. She squirms beneath me as I rub my hand against the crotch of her jeans. After ripping the bra away from her skin, I take one of her stiff nipples into my mouth. As I flick my teeth over the hard nub, Allie goes crazy. She moans and screeches and tangles her hands in my hair to yank my head back. She gyrates against my hand, frantically rubbing her covered cunt against the force of my fingers.