“Maybe you have to prepare for the inevitable. If he sees Anna, he’ll find out.”
“I can hide Anna.”
“Hide her? Are you listening to yourself?”
I spread my fingers flat on the table. They were beginning to hurt from all the cracking. “Everything’s going to hell,” I whispered, realizing the true impact of Jax’s arrival. It meant upheaval in my daughter’s life.
“Didn’t Jax ask about Anna when he saw the photo?”
I chuckled, but it wasn’t a happy sound. I wasn’t sure if it was nervousness or fear or uncertainty, but I suddenly couldn’t stop laughing. I covered my mouth and laughed, my eyes tearing up, and my ribs hurting from the effort. “You know,” I started, then clutched my stomach as our first customers of the day turned to glance at the wild woman laughing. Me, I was the wild woman. I was also the owner. I needed to shut up.
I pressed my lips between my teeth to stop myself from laughing. Then I grabbed Clara’s a hand, my voice lowered to a whisper.
“He asked me to come over for a drink with my husband.” I winced as my stomach ached from the suppressed laugh. “Jax thinks Brodey is my husband.”
“What the hell!” Clara laughed. “How did that happen?”
“Because it’s Brodey’s dad’s old house. I moved there so Anna could be close to her grandfather. But now Jax thinks I’m Brodey’s wife. He decided I must be.”
“What happens when he finds out that’s a lie?”
“I didn’t lie. He came up with that one on his own. Spinning it in his crazy head. The look on his face, though. He was so angry that Brodey had married me. Or I had married Brodey. Or both. He won’t find out the truth, though. He’s determined to hide out in his exile. I don’t get why he’s here. Of all the places he could go?”
“Yeah. That crazy party? I’ve seen photos. Channel 21 announced they have video footage coming too. Looks bad. They found a lot of hard drugs at his place.”
That sobered me up. Jax had always been larger than life. Cocky, confident. He made decisions with a snap of his fingers and was always in control. I couldn’t picture him at anyone’s mercy, much less the media.
“He keeps calling Ashland a shithole.”
“The nerve!” Clara was as horrified as I was pissed.
“I know. But I can deal with all that. I just don’t want him to put the pieces together about Anna.”
“Why don’t you talk him into leaving?”
I shook my head as familiar shivers of fear traveled up my spine. “You know Jax. He does what he wants to. That why John and I agreed he shouldn’t know about Anna.”
“Because he’d take her.”
My eyes snapped to Clara’s. I could tell she saw my fear on my face. “He’s got the money. The power. You know how he is. Once he puts his mind to something, he gets it done. He doesn’t care who he’s hurting when he’s on his way to his goal. He doesn’t give a shit. He wants what he wants. If he decides he wants Anna—”
“It’s okay. He won’t find out.”
“I won’t give my child to him. She’s mine. Jax threw me away like I was disposable. He was with me all night, Clara, before his flight. He didn’t tell me it was over. He fucked me all night and kissed me on the forehead as he told me to meet him at the airport. Then he dumped me. He didn’t even glance back at me when he left.”
“Look, Liv. I hate the guy and his guts. Senior year of high school, he acted like he was better than everyone else. Just got cocky. I’m sure he’ll leave Ashland soon.”
“You think? I was clinging to a thread of hope.”
“Nobody cares what these NFL players do. They’re invincible. Jax hasn’t been suspended or sent to rehab. As soon as the frenzy over his orgy-slash-drug fest dies down, he’ll go back to his old life.”
“I hope so. Anna doesn’t need Jax, and I sure as hell don’t.”
“You do you, girl. Who needs a stinky man in their life, anyway?”
“Well, Jax doesn’t stink. Ow!” My wrist stung from where Clara smacked it. “What was that for?”
“That is for thinking anything remotely positive about that jerk that impregnated you and then dumped you. If you as much as sniff his scent, I’m going to burn down your precious bakery.”
4
Jax
For some reason, my dad still had Wi-Fi.
Thanks, Dad.
With no cable, I spent the entire day on my phone, downloading a bunch of stupid games to keep me busy. I’d heard Liv’s car pulling into her driveway. Even though I’d been tempted to go look, I didn’t. She was right. I was being creepy.
I’d gone from a full life of partying and friends and colleagues to this drab rundown shack in the middle of nowhere. I’d grown up here, and the house reeked of my facade of a childhood.
Didn’t help that the house was stuck in the Middle Ages. I was reduced to filling up a plastic bucket with water from the bathroom sink then using a coffee mug to wash my body. At least there was shampoo.
My hair still damp, I went into my dad’s room to see if he had an old hair dryer lying around. It would probably be Mom’s. She hadn’t taken a lot of stuff with her. She’d couldn’t bail on me and my dad fast enough.
I was rummaging through the chest of drawers when I spotted movement outside the window.
My hands still, my body taught with excitement, I couldn’t believe how hungry for human interaction I’d become in just twenty-four hours. How did people live here? There was nothing to do. No life. This place was dead.
I spotted Liv sitting on her back steps. Even though it was almost dark, I could still see her. I squinted and saw a pack of cigarettes in her hand. She took one out and poked it between her lips.
I turned around and ran. My feet thudded on the wooden floor as I made my way out the back door and through the shrubbery that was once my dad’s garden. Liv’s gaze snapped up when I was ten feet away from her. Breathing hard, I plopped myself down right next to her on the step.
I tilted my head to the side and stared at her. God, she was so pretty. Her full, pouty, pink lips soft and bare. A cigarette popped in her keyhole pout. Her nose small and slightly upturned. Her large green eyes shooting fiery sparks at me. She wasn’t going to let me get away with this.
“What are you doing?” she asked, still holding the unlit cigarette between her lips.
“I’m sitting with you.”
Her brows furrowed. “Why?”
“Because I’ll punch a hole through one of my dad’s walls if I don’t hang out with a real live human being.”
For a moment, it looked like Liv was going to protest. But even though she had a sizzling temper, she was also kind. Unlike me, she gave a shit about anything and everything. Rolling her eyes, she lit her cigarette.
I realized some small talk was in order. “How was your day?”
She laughed, and I used the opportunity to ogle her.
A white T-shirt stretched taut over the fullness of her breasts, and her jeans clung to her toned thighs. Leaning forward, she rested her elbows on her knees and regarded me with amusement.
“What are we doing? Playing house?”
“Five minutes. Just fucking play house.” The natural authoritative tone in my voice rang in the silent outdoors. “I’ll go crazy in that place my dad calls home. Have you seen the inside of it lately? It’s like no one even lives there anymore.”
She sighed, clearly giving up the fight in her that I didn’t even know the prelude to. “Well, John doesn’t stay here often.”
“Where is he, anyway?”
“Wait a minute.” She looked at me incredulously. A look that said, Oh, for Christ’s sake, you douche.
“You haven’t spoken to your dad?”
“I know all three spots he uses to hide his house key. Where is he?”
“Nepal.”
“Of course.”
“He can do whatever he wants, you know? Just like you can.” She nudged her shoulder against mine.
<
br /> The playful move was so unexpected that I froze. It was hard enough to not fantasize about her alone in a shack. But with her hip pressed next to mine, it was torment.
Married women were off-limits. It was a rule I followed.
There are plenty of unmarried women out there, Jax.
But they’re not Liv.
I met Liv a few months before I turned seventeen. I was too young, wasn’t looking for a relationship. But Liv and I hit it off. We had mutual friends, so I got to see her laugh every day. She’d help her friends with projects and was basically the coolest chick I’d ever seen. She didn’t act like those prudes who turned their nose up at everything and came across as high-maintenance. As if that was a plus.
Liv never judged anyone. Her presence lit up a room. Two weeks after we first met, I kissed her after football practice. We’d been inseparable for the rest of high school.
I’d been madly in love with Liv.
Then my eighteenth birthday came around. The world as I knew it went to hell. I lashed out. Liv took the worst of it. Yet, she understood. We survived through it all.
Then I got into college on a football scholarship, and Liv got into another school far away. Right after, Liv’s mom was diagnosed with ovarian cancer.
My own life was spiraling out of control. My dad was gone. Mom was gone. I didn’t know what the fuck I was doing or where I was headed. I left for college and broke it off with Liv.
Two months later, Liv stopped talking my calls. I’d called Brodey to ask how she was, and he told me, “Liv hasn’t gone to college. She’s still in Ashland taking care of her mom.”
That’s the last I’d heard about her.
Now, sitting next to her, I couldn’t deny that I probably hadn’t tried hard enough to stay in touch with her.
“I’m sorry about your mom, Liv.”
She drew in a shaky breath. “Thanks. It’s been a long time.”
“So you never went to college?”
“Nope.”
I noticed the tension in her jaw when she spoke. This was probably something she didn’t want to discuss.
“So where do you work? On Saturdays too?”
Liv offered me her cigarette. “Can you sit quietly and not interrogate me? I had a rough day at work. This is my silent time.”
“Oh, okay.” I took a drag of the cigarette and coughed. “I haven’t had one in ages,” I sputtered through my coughs. “I thought you quit too.”
“I did.” Liv then took a long, exaggerated drag of her cigarette, the end sizzling red in the dark.
“Oh, okay then.” I chuckled, suddenly remembering what I’d stuck into my pocket earlier. Pulling it out, I handed it to her.
“Wow. You still do this?” She gaped at the joint.
“I don’t.”
She snickered and ground out her cigarette then popped the joint between her lips. Her hands glowed as they curved over the yellow flame on top of her lighter as she lit it.
She exhaled the smoke in a long, narrow wisp. “Just like old times.”
“I know, right? It used to be for fun. Now I’m hoping it’ll give me a good night’s sleep.”
Liv grinned, and I used the opportunity to gaze at her profile.
I should go back inside. Hell, I should’ve never come out here.
Liv is married. Liv is married. Liv is married.
I jolted off the steps, away from Liv’s tempting, warm leg, and stood facing her.
She exhaled another puff. “What’s up with you? You’re so jumpy. You didn’t murder anyone. You went a little crazy with the whole—”
I lifted a brow. I had no idea what she was on about.
“A little crazy with the hookers and the drugs.”
“Oh, that. Yeah, that’s all bullshit.”
Liv chuckled. “Oh, come on. It was at your house in Seattle. We’ve all seen the pictures. No matter what channel you switch to, that’s what they’re talking about.”
“Yeah. I wasn’t even in Seattle. I was in Miami.”
Liv stared at me, the joint forgotten between her narrow, shapely fingers.
I plucked it out and took a drag.
“What the fuck, Jax. Why don’t you do a press conference and tell them?”
“I can’t.”
“Why the hell not?”
“Because I don’t want the world to know where I really was that night.”
“It can’t be worse than that disgusting orgy.”
“I was in a doctor’s office in Miami. My therapist.”
Liv’s lips parted. I expected her to ask why. What happened? Was I depressed? The usual judgmental, annoying-as-fuck questions.
“I understand.”
My heart slammed against my ribs. “You understand? That’s all?”
“I mean, you’ve always been this tough guy-slash-invincible athlete. I get that you wouldn’t want the world to know about a vulnerable, private thing like that.”
I stared at the ground because my cock was pushing against the front of trousers. Everything about her sent a direct command to my cock to wake up.
I needed Liv’s warmth in my life.
She’s someone’s wife, you jerk. Doesn’t fucking matter how wonderful she is.
“A friend of mine threw that party. Mason Ballard.”
“Oh shit. The actor?”
“Yeah. He asked if he could stay there for the weekend. My house overlooks Lake Washington, and he loves the place. So I said okay. Next thing I know, there’s a raid I’m watching on TV. Hookers and junkies filling the place. Apparently, people in there were having what’s being deemed the biggest clusterfuck ever.”
“And you were in Miami?”
“I was sitting on a couch, speaking to this short bald guy who makes exceptions for me, sees me whenever I’m available. He had me by the throat, figuratively speaking, forcing me to talk about my childhood. Because Diane is stubborn, and she forced me to go.”
“Who’s Diane?” Liv cut in. “Your girlfriend?”
“No! No girlfriend. She’s my publicist. And she’s a bitch. She nags me too much.”
“Well, you listen to her. She clearly means something to you.”
I didn’t know why I listened. Probably because in her own punitive way, Diane gave a shit about me. “I just have to live with being called the mastermind behind a coke-fueled, heroine-pumped orgy and hope to live that down someday. I’m not going to tell anyone I was in therapy.”
“You told me.” Her lips curved into an adorable little smile. “What if I talk to the press?”
I scoffed. “You’d never. You’ve never hurt a fly in your life.”
Her face fell. “I’m no saint, all right?”
“You’re offended that I think you’re a good person?”
“Good people are boring. I’ve done some crazy shit.”
“Hit me. What crazy shit?”
Liv opened her mouth then clamped it shut. “I can’t think of anything right now. I’m a little buzzed.”
I laughed, my head thrown back. She looked up at me with wonder in her green eyes. “I know you better than you know you, Liv. The only two things bad about you. Thing one: you’re fucking impulsive. Thing two: you break more dishes than you use. Thing three: you snore as loud as a truck driver.”
A Marlboro box came flying at me, hitting me in the shoulder.
“That’s three things. Not two.”
“Don’t get aggressive.” I couldn’t stop laughing. It felt good too. When was the last time I laughed like this over stupid shit? The women I hung out with were too insecure about themselves. Telling them they snored? That would count as emotional abuse. But Liv knew I loved all her rough edges.
Liv was grinning when I sat back down.
It’s okay, I can do this—sit next to her without getting horny.
I missed this: the banter, the laughter. I couldn’t control my need for her. But the important thing was that I wasn’t acting on impulse. That’s what mattered.
I nudged her shoulder with mine, jokingly. Liv squealed and fell right off the steps and onto the dirt.
“Shit! I’m sorry.” Chuckling, I reached for her, pulling her back up to the steps. But she stumbled again, laughing so hard I could barely make out the words she was saying.
“You pushed me!”
“I didn’t mean to! I didn’t realize it was that hard.”
“Ow, my butt.”
I grabbed her forearms and pulled her up to her feet to stand before me. “Come here. You okay?”
Liv leaned against me for balance. She lifted her head up and laughed, her soft pink lips lifting toward me. Higher. Parted. Inching closer.
I jerked away before our mouths touched and released her. She stumbled back but managed to stay on her feet.
Silence.
Dammit. What was I doing?
Oh, wait. I didn’t do anything. It was her!
I gaped at her. The laughter gone. The night silent. Chilled, almost.
Liv was staring at me like I’d grown horns. Pale, white as a sheet.
Twisting on her heel, she ran up the steps and slammed the screen door. Through it, she glanced back at me with an expression that looked like resentment.
“You know, Jax? I really wish you’d go back to where you came from.”
“You know, Liv? I get it. I got that message the first time. It makes me feel like shit when you keep telling me to leave.”
The kitchen door slammed against its frame. Her words hit me like a punch in the gut.
My jaw clenched, and I berated myself for making myself vulnerable.
Liv, I’d found, possessed the power to wound me.
I stood there for a few long seconds then picked up the pack of cigarettes. I placed it on the steps then strode back to my dad’s house. I wanted to scream and rant at Diana for putting me here.
I’d almost done it.
I could’ve kissed Liv.
Liv is married. Liv is married. Liv is married.
No go, Jax.
If only my body had as much sense as my head.
My cock was rock hard, and my balls ached with the weight of my unspilled load.
5
Liv
Baby's Daddy: An Enemies to Lovers Romance Page 3