“How can my questioning God be considered praise?” Joy was confused about the concept.
“Going to God in the first place, is your acknowledgment of who He is in your life. So go on and ask your questions… praise Him in disguise, and see if you won’t get your answers.”
Joy kissed her mother on the cheek and stood. “I’ve got to get back to work. Next time I stop in for lunch, at least have a turkey sandwich or something in this place.”
“This is a bakery, Joy. You’ll have to bring your own sandwiches and bring one for your mother, also.”
As Joy headed towards the door Are You Listening began playing. Joy put her hand on the doorknob, but didn’t move. Carmella could tell the words of that song were affecting her. Numerous big name gospel singers were involved in the album that Kirk Franklin had produced for Haiti. None of the singers mattered at that moment, only the words.
Paraphrasing the words, Carmella told her daughter, “Yes, Joy, God is listening, talk to Him, because He feels your pain.”
3
Psalm 13: 1-2
How long wilt thou forget me, O Lord? For ever? How long wilt thou hide thy face from me? How long shall I take counsel in my soul, having sorrow in my heart daily? How long shall mine enemy be exalted over me?
When Carmella arrived home that night, Ramsey was on the phone with Dontae. Carmella felt a twinge of jealousy as she listened to her husband talk with her son as if they were the best of friends. Oh, she was thrilled that both her kids were over the moon about Ramsey; that made her decision to remarry a whole lot easier. She wanted her son to feel like he could come to her with anything. But she realized his need for a father figure and tried to calm her jealous heart. She sat down on the sofa, picked up the remote and turned the television to the evening news.
“I got you, man, don’t even worry about it,” Ramsey said as he and Dontae ended the call.
“What did Dontae want?” Carmella muted the television as Ramsey joined her on the sofa.
“Do you normally greet your man with questions or a kiss after a long day of work?”
She smiled. Ramsey was a wonderful husband… and the fact that he was so into her, didn’t hurt matters one bit. Carmella threw her arms around him and lovingly kissed him. But as soon as they parted, she asked again, “What did Dontae want?”
Ramsey placed a kiss on her forehead. “He got us a box for his game against the Panthers and he made me promise that all of us would be there.”
“But how can you make that promise? Only Joy, Renee and Ronny still live in North Carolina.”
“Raven and Ramsey Jr. are only a plane ride away, but you are right about RaShan, he’s still on his mission trip to Africa, so he won’t be able to attend,” Ramsey conceded.
All of Ramsey’s children’s names began with an ‘R’. If that didn’t signify just how much love was going on between him and his first wife, Carmella didn’t know what would. Even though Carmella wished she had never let Ramsey go in the first place after having been high school sweethearts, she was still thankful that Ramsey’s first wife had adored him. And she understood that a small part of Ramsey would always belong to his deceased wife.
Carmella didn’t mind. Ramsey was able to love her and give his heart without worrying about what Carmella might do to him, because of the love relationship he had already experienced. Carmella, on the other hand, still dealt with insecurity issues because of the way Nelson had discarded her and she suspected that she would have those issues for some time to come. But Ramsey was patient with her. He recognized the baggage that Carmella brought into the marriage, so he was careful not to do things that stoked her insecurities like sneaking around or keeping secrets and Carmella was grateful for that. The Lord knew just what she needed in a forever partner since her first marriage had ended so horribly.
“It’s important to Dontae that we all come to his game. He plans to treat us like royalty with our own box where we can watch the game and eat to our hearts’ content.”
“You did tell that boy not to order alcohol for us, right?” Carmella knew her son. He was in his partying stage and she wasn’t about to put up with his shenanigans.
“He knows.” Ramsey lifted Carmella’s hands and held onto them as he added, “But hon, we need to talk, because there’s something else you need to know.”
His comment worried her, but it wasn’t the kind of I’m-leaving-you-for-my-twenty-three-year-old-girlfriend worry that she had when Nelson wanted to talk. Her worry was that Dontae might have gotten himself into some other trouble, like the time he’d gotten arrested for busting out Jasmine’s car windows or the time he’d been arrested for drunk driving two years ago, when he and his fellow college football players were out celebrating a win.
“He’s not in any trouble, is he?”
Ramsey shook his head. “No, Carmella. It’s nothing like that. This is good news. Dontae wants to introduce us to a lady friend of his.”
Carmella’s eyes got big. “My baby is serious about someone?”
Nodding, Ramsey said, “I think he is. And he’s not your baby anymore. Dontae is a grown man and you’re going to have to accept that.”
“Grown man?” She rolled her eyes at that comment. “He’s twenty-two, Ramsey. What boy do you know that is fully grown at twenty-two and able to make a decision about getting serious with a woman?”
“I was,” Ramsey said with a hint of sadness in his eyes.
“Aw honey,” Carmella said as she gently put her hand on Ramsey’s face. “I’m sorry that things ended the way they did with your first marriage.”
“Before you came along, I didn’t think I would ever be happy again. I’m thankful that God reconnected us.”
“So am I.” They kissed again.
Then Ramsey said, “One more thing. And I need you to take a deep breath.”
She did.
“Dontae wants Nelson to come to the game that night, also. And he really needs you to be okay with that.”
Carmella took another deep breath. “Whew,” she said as she fanned her face. “I didn’t expect that. But then again, I guess I should have.” She took another deep breath, calming herself. “Okay, if that’s what Dontae wants, then I’ll find a way to be all right with it.”
“I’m anxious to meet this girl who has Dontae all tied up in knots,” Ramsey said, trying to get the conversation away from Nelson.
“She better treat him right, that’s all I have to say.”
Ramsey shook a finger at her. “Carmella, be nice to this girl. It’s important to Dontae.”
Carmella lifted her hands. “Hey, as long as she knows how special Dontae is, she’ll have no problems with me… what’s her name?” Carmella asked, but then something on the television caught her eye. She picked up the remote and turned up the volume. Nelson was on the news, but he was in handcuffs.
“What’s this about?” Ramsey asked as he turned his face toward the television.
They sat there listening as a newscaster reported that Nelson had just been arrested on charges of accepting bribes on some of the court cases he handled.
“What the devil?” Carmella said as her mouth hung open. Joy and Dontae had a hard enough time dealing with the demise of their parents’ twenty-five-year marriage. How on earth would they deal with having a father in prison?
***
Joy was rubbing her hands together and inwardly dancing like no one was watching. Oh how the mighty have fallen, were the words that kept repeating themselves in her head as she rushed into the courtroom for her father’s arraignment. Since her father was an elected official, the district attorney’s office was bringing out the big guns, but she had begged for the second chair spot, and now she was running into the courtroom, anxious to see her father squirm.
But once again Joy’s day was ruined by Lance Bryant. Evidently her father had hired Lance. The moment she walked into the courtroom, Lance and her father started whispering. When the judge took his seat and the arraignm
ent began, Lance had the doggone nerve to say, “Judge Blake, I think we need to do a little house cleaning before we can begin this morning.”
“What type of house cleaning?” Judge Blake asked.
Lance pointed towards the prosecution table. “Ms. Marshall is my client’s daughter and we believe that she needs to recuse herself from this case.”
“Recuse myself?” Joy said as if she’d never heard of the concept.
Lance wasn’t above reminding her, however. He looked her way and said, “You do understand why you would need to do that, don’t you? For the same reason you wanted my client to recuse himself… the relationship the two of you share as father and daughter presents a problem for the court.”
“I am more than capable of doing my job. It doesn’t matter who the defendant is. I can prosecute him just as well as I could any other criminal,” Joy said emphatically.
Lance turned back to Judge Blake. “Assistant DA Joy Marshall has very strong feelings against her father since he divorced her mother. Therefore, we do not believe that she will be able to handle this case objectively. As a matter-of-fact, we don’t understand why the DA’s office would even allow a daughter to prosecute her own father.”
I begged them for the second chair, that’s why, Joy wanted to shout at Lance.
Assistant District Attorney Markus Gavin spoke up. “I am the first chair on this case, and I can get another attorney for my second chair, if that will solve the problem.”
“No, Markus.” Joy shook her head.
Markus turned to Joy. The look on his face was not sympathetic. “They’re right, Joy. I never should have given you the second chair on this case. Let’s just make this go away so we can get on with the case, okay?”
Joy wanted to object, throw herself on the mercy of the court… something… anything. But in the end, she knew she wasn’t going to win the argument. So she yielded to the court. She caught the smirk on Lance's face, as if he thought he'd won against her again. She wanted to jump across the prosecution table and wipe that smirk off of his face.
After bail was set, Joy was still fuming, so before leaving the courtroom, she pulled up beside Lance, touched his arm to get his attention. When he turned toward her, she said, "I need to speak with you for a moment."
Lance turned to his client for approval. Nelson said, "Go ahead, I'll meet you in your office in about an hour." Then Nelson looked toward Joy and nodded. "Good to see you this morning, Joy."
"It wouldn't have been good for you if your lawyer hadn't had me thrown off the case. Are you afraid of your own daughter? Is that what this is about?" Joy fired back.
"I just didn't want you mixed up in this mess. I've damaged our relationship enough. I don't want one more thing to come between us."
"That's real sweet of you, Daddy dearest. But you can save it. I don't have any bail money for you."
"He already has his bail covered, but thanks for thinking about my client," Lance said as the guards took Nelson away.
"Don't try to be cute." Joy turned and stalked off. But when she noticed Lance wasn't following, she swung back around and said, "Are you coming?"
He pointed at his chest as if to ask, "Who, me?"
"Who else?" The man infuriated her. He acted all innocent, when he knew exactly what he was doing to her. Well, Joy wasn’t putting up with his games anymore and she was going to let him have it. They made their way to an empty office on the same floor as the courtroom. The moment they walked in and Joy shut the door behind them, she got in his face. “Just what is your problem?”
“Wait a minute.” Lance waved his hands as if waving a white flag. “Where’s all this hostility coming from?”
“You know exactly where it’s coming from. You keep getting me thrown off my cases. What’s that about, huh?”
“Hey, you’re the one who came into the courtroom the other day with guns blazing, trying to get your father thrown off a case. It just so happens that my client preferred your dad.”
Joy wasn’t listening to him. “And then you and my dad get me thrown off of a case I had to beg just to be allowed to sit second chair on.”
“You had no business asking for this case in the first place. You know good and well that there is a conflict of interest here.” Lance was not backing down.
“I also know that this is going to be a big deal case, and I could have used it as an opportunity for advancement, but you’ve ruined that for me now.”
Lance stepped back and leaned against the door as he studied Joy without saying anything.
“What?” Joy said when Lance kept staring at her.
“I’m just wondering if the beautiful woman I spend my free time fantasizing about is truly as cold hearted as she seems.”
Did he just say that he’s been fantasizing about me? What was she supposed to say to that? Joy had no idea, so she chose to focus on the ‘cold hearted’ part of his statement. She folded her arms across her chest and said, “You stand by and watch your father try to destroy your mother, after he leaves her for your best friend and then come back and see me if your heart hasn’t turned a little cold. I’d love to know how you do it.”
He was staring at her without saying anything again.
“What’s wrong with you? Say something, already.”
“If you want to know what I’m thinking, I’ll tell you.” He pushed off from the door and sauntered toward her, prompting her to back further into the room. But he kept moving closer. “I’m glad that you’ve been recused from this case. Matter-of-fact, I’m going to ask that you be recused from all of my cases going forward.”
He was standing so close to her that she could feel the heat pulsating off of him. Her voice got caught in her throat as she lifted her head, stared straight at those baby brown eyes of his and said, “I see no reason why I shouldn’t go up against you on another case.”
He lowered his head, and with their lips just inches apart he said, “I’ve got a reason for you.” And then Lance dipped down, their lips met and he got acquainted with the taste of her mouth. When the kiss was over, the fire lingered, and Lance told her, “I wouldn’t be able to do that if we were going up against each other on another case.”
Joy couldn’t think. Words were swimming around her head, but they weren’t making sense. Her feelings were jumbled. She wanted to stepped away from Lance and give him a good dressing down for putting his soft, luscious lips on hers. But before she could make up her mind what she needed to do, the door to the small room opened and her boss, the district attorney peeked his head in. “I’d like to speak to you when you get a moment, Joy,” he said without acknowledging the fact that she had practically been caught with lips locked with the enemy.
But Joy saw it in his eyes, and knew that the meeting she was about to have with the District Attorney would be nothing like the day he shook her hand, telling her she had a bright future with the department and welcomed her aboard.
4
Psalm 13:3-4
Consider and hear me, O Lord my God: lighten mine eyes, lest I sleep the sleep of death; Lest mine enemy say, I have prevailed against him; and those that trouble me rejoice when I am moved.
“I am so sick of this, Mom. I’m not just whining either. Some days I feel like I can’t win for losing so I might as well just give up,” Joy declared.
“It’s not that bad, Joy. Please calm down,” Carmella said as she sat in her kitchen with Joy.
“Not that bad? Mom, my boss just wrote me up. He said that my vendetta against Dad is clouding my judgment and making the office look bad.”
Carmella handed her daughter a cup of hot chocolate. “So you just need to do your job and stop worrying about Nelson.”
Joy rolled her eyes and then ran her hands down her face. “You act as if I want to feel this way. I can’t help it, Mom. Just thinking of Dad and everything he did to us makes me see red. And now I’m going to lose my job.”
“Stop being so dramatic, Joy. You are a good lawyer, so I doubt y
ou’ll lose your job over this. Just be careful and stop this vendetta you have against your father.”
“I just get so angry every time I think about what he did to us.”
Carmella put her hand over Joy’s hand. “The divorce was hard for all of us. But I truly think you fared the worst in all of it. You were so busy taking care of me after I fell apart that you didn’t have time to grieve or to deal with the loss of your hero.”
Joy scoffed at that. “Some hero… the man is a felon.”
“Your dad has done a lot of things, but I don’t know if I believe he would take bribes. Nelson has too much respect for the law to do something like that.”
Joy shook her head. “I don’t understand you, Mom. The man left you for another woman and you are still defending him.”
“After being married to someone as long as I was married to your father, I kind of think I know him a little bit.”
“You didn’t know that he was a cheater.” When Joy saw the pained expression on her mother’s face, she quickly said, “I shouldn’t have said that. I’m sorry, Mom.”
Carmella waved Joy’s concern away. “Your father lost his way. I know that. But I once knew a man who was gentle and kind, and he loved God as much as I do. Now I don’t know what happened to turn Nelson away from God, but I don’t believe that he’s gone so far that God can’t snatch him back. That’s why I’m still praying for his soul. So, I don’t want you to give up on your father. Okay?”
Her mother was right. Her dad had been her hero. She had been a daddy’s girl from the minute she was pushed out of the womb. Everything she did was about making her father proud. But he’d crushed her heart and spirit, and now Joy was still trying to put the pieces back together again. “I don’t know if I can promise that, Mom. I think I’ve pretty much written him off. I’m even anxious to attend his sentencing.”
Praise Him Anyhow - Volume 1 Page 12