by Emilia Rose
“I’m being serious—”
I snatched her chin in my hand. Everyone around us stopped and looked over. Never in my life had I laid a hand on Charolette. But then again, I had never lost my mate, and I had never had this much control of Mars.
At least Mars knew when to stop. Mars knew what was right and what was wrong. Mars knew I needed to be healed. But I didn’t fucking care. My mate was out there. And I had to find her.
Charolette pulled herself out of my grip. “I told you not to go out to find that stone.”
“Leave, right now, Charolette.”
She was testing me.
“Leave now.”
“Not until you get healed,” she said stubbornly. “What would Aurora think?”
When she said her name, I growled lowly and clenched my fists by my sides, everything in me hurting. What would Aurora think about this? I wasn’t sure. But I knew what I thought …
I thought that Aurora was dead.
Chapter 41
Aurora
A thunderous roar of paws hitting the forest floor echoed throughout the cave. Cries from my old and new pack had stopped hours ago, which meant that these were hounds coming to kill me, and I had no way of getting out of here alive unless I acted now.
The hound who had healed me sat by the entrance with his ears pinned back and his eyes scanning the surrounding woods. I gazed around the cave at anything that I could use for a weapon. Whoever he was had saved me … but I couldn’t stay. Not when Ares was out there.
I wouldn’t go down without a fight. If I got to Ares before he died, I might be able to put my stone in his back, so he could live. I’d give my entire life for him to stay alive, for him to be happy even if it was just for a moment. He didn’t deserve any more hurt.
“Let me out,” I said to the wolf through trembling lips. “Let me out now!”
When he didn’t respond, I grasped a medium-sized rock I’d found toward the back of the cave and slowly approached him. Goddess, I didn’t know why I was afraid of hurting this hound. Though he had saved me twice, he was part of their vicious group of creatures, and he was holding me hostage until they came back for me.
It should be easy for me to kill him.
After swallowing hard, I took another step toward him and grasped the rock in both of my hands.
His head, Aurora. Go for his head, then sprint out of the cave, and don’t stop running. Not until you find Ares’s body … then we can stop. Then, they can kill me for all I care.
With trembling hands, I lifted the rock into the air and aimed. Before I could stop myself, I closed my eyes and hurled the rock straight at his head. It hit with a thud and cracked his skull.
The sound made me recoil. I had hurt people before—broken Marcel’s finger, killed hounds with my knife—but this felt so wrong. Something about hurting him—the only hound that had helped me before, the hound with the stone like mine—it felt so fucking wrong.
Growling lowly, he shook his head from side to side as blood gushed out of his wound. I rushed out of the cave, but he followed me and sank his teeth into my calf to stop me from moving.
I gazed down at him, trying to pull my leg away but couldn’t. My eyes filled with tears. This was so fucking sad. I was so fucking sad. Why did I feel bad for hurting him when … when … all his kind did was kill viciously?
The hound made eye contact with me for the first time, and my heart stopped. Familiar eyes stared up at me, and my eyes filled with even more tears.
No. No … I didn’t believe it. I couldn’t believe it. It wasn’t true.
He pleaded with me to stop moving, begged me with his tiny whimpers. I inhaled deeply and smelled cornfields, endless memories, and better days. Swinging at the playground. Chasing each other through the park. Staring up at the moon and talking about how we’d meet the Moon Goddess one day.
More howls sounded through the woods, and the hound’s eyes widened. They were coming for me. He released me almost immediately and nudged me in the direction of Mom’s pack, as if to say, Go.
“Wh-what about you?” I asked breathlessly. Tears spilled down my cheeks. “You c-can’t stay here.” I didn’t want to lose him, not when I—
Stop, Aurora. He’s not real. It’s not really him.
He died.
“Go,” he said through the mind link. It was faint, and I barely heard it … but he said it. “Meet again.”
I swallowed hard, gave him one last look, and sprinted toward my Ares. My heart told me to stay with this hound, but my wolf tugged me toward my mate. We needed to see him, dead or alive. And so I ran and I ran and I ran until I could smell the putrid stench of pools of blood.
Wolves littered the woods, their lifeless bodies covered in claw marks and bite wounds. Fur hung from trees. Flies flew over bloody guts. The lush greens had turned a sanguine color.
I gazed at each and every one of the men and women, remembering when I used to train with them, when Mom used to let me train. Young men and women, some teenagers, most warriors.
The hounds didn’t care who they killed. They’d killed people who hadn’t even been on the battlefield earlier. Houses had their doors wide open. Windows were shattered. Blood splattered against the siding.
My lips quivered. I was a bad luna and a bad alpha. This was all my fault. Every single one of these deaths was on my hands. If I hadn’t told Ares to run on Mom’s pack … things might’ve been different. Tony might not have betrayed us. All these people might still be alive.
A tear raced down my cheek, but I quickly pushed it away. I couldn’t cry. Ares thought I was strong, so I would be strong.
When the pack house came into view, I took a deep breath and walked toward the backyard. I begged myself to be restrained, but a whimper clawed its way up my throat and out of my mouth.
Ares had come here with thirty wolves, and at least half of them were lying in their own blood. The majority of Mom’s wolves had been killed, but I couldn’t recognize most of them. With faces torn to pieces and all this gore, it was hard to identify anyone.
“Ares,” I said, voice shaky through the quiet forest. “Ares …”
Nobody answered.
I stared up at the moon and wondered why the Moon Goddess had allowed something this horrific to happen again. Why hadn’t she helped us? Where was she?
Walking through the bodies, I touched each one and tried to find him. But nobody felt the same as he did. Nobody looked the same as he did. Nobody had the same sweet hazelnut scent as he did. Or maybe I just couldn’t spot him with bones jutting out of his ripped flesh.
After walking through everyone, the last person I found was Mom. I doubled over, tears falling from my eyes. With her highlighted hair and that scar running down her ear, she was still distinguishable … but I felt like the shittiest daughter to have ever lived.
Though she had made me feel like shit, I knew that all she’d wanted was for this pack to survive. She had given me book after book to study to become a smarter alpha, had tried to train me to be strong, and I really believed that she’d loved me at some point—even if it was just a bit.
And now, I would never see her again.
After closing her dull eyes, I stood up, determined to find my mate. Maybe he was still alive.
A twig snapped, and I whipped my head toward it.
My old neighbor’s four-year old child, Yara, stared at me from behind a big oak tree. Dressed in a pink polka-dot onesie, she sprinted toward me with tears streaming down her face. “Alpha Aurora!” When she reached me, she jumped into my arms. “Alpha Aurora, my daddy is missing. I-I can’t find anyone.”
My heart shattered, and I held her tightly in my arms. “I …” What could I even say to her? “I … don’t know where your father is. Let’s try to go find any others,” I whispered, hoping to keep my voice steady.
Since the last hound attack, I’d created underground shelters for pups to hide and to stay safe in while the warriors fought outside. They were all connect
ed by a series of tunnels that led to a larger underground shelter under the pack house.
Covering Yara’s eyes so she wouldn’t see any more of this terror, I walked toward the pack house. I set her down, shut the sliding door, and locked it. She sniffled and wiped her snot with the back of her hand.
We walked down the stairs to the basement. After over a decade of not using these shelters, Mom had decided to turn off all the electricity down here despite me telling her not to. I lit a torch and grabbed Yara’s hand.
We hurried through room after room, finding no pups inside any of them. My chest tightened as we approached the last three rooms. If there were no pups, that would mean that they were all dead.
First room … nobody.
Second room … nobody.
I opened the third room and peered into the darkness. Five sets of eyes stared up at me from the corner.
I crouched down to their level. “It’s okay,” I said, reaching out my arms. “You’re safe. Everything is going to be okay. It’s Aurora.”
The pups ran into my arms, clung on to my legs, and grasped my fingers as we walked back to the pack house. I didn’t know if everything was going to really be okay, and I definitely didn’t know if we were safe, but I knew that I would protect them with my life.
I ushered the pups up the steps and instructed them to sit on the couch as I searched the house for all the silver knives I could find. I stuffed them into a backpack, grabbed a pair of car keys from the counter, handed each pup a bag of chips I’d kept for Ruffles in the pantry, and hurried to put them into Mom’s old SUV—hoping the damn thing had enough gas to get us the hell off this property.
After plunging the key into the slot, I thanked the Moon Goddess that the gas tank was full. I threw the car in reverse and sped toward Ares’s pack.
When I pulled onto Ares’s property, the early morning sun was rising just over the horizon. The kids had only fallen asleep for a couple hours last night and had woken up, hungry and full of questions about their parents that I didn’t have the strength to answer, but I hadn’t stopped driving. If we’d stopped and the hounds spotted us, I had known that I wouldn’t be able to protect them.
I glanced at them through the rearview mirror. “This is where we’ll be staying from now on. We’ll be safe here.”
Some of Ares’s warriors watched the car through the woods. I made eye contact with one of them, and he immediately sprinted toward the pack house. All I wanted was to find Ares, alive and well.
I parked in the driveway and tugged each and every one of the six pups out of the car. They grasped each other’s hands and followed me in a line, like ducklings following their mother.
Mr. Barrett jogged up to me from his house. “Aurora.” He sighed deeply through his nose. “I’m so glad you’re safe. Ares is flipping out. He won’t listen to any—”
My brows furrowed, eyes widening. “Ares is alive?” I asked in disbelief. He nodded his head, and I gave Yara’s hand to Mr. Barrett. “Please, watch them for a bit.”
“Of course.” He grabbed Yara’s hand, smiled down at the kids, and nudged me toward the training field. “Hurry, before he leaves. Ares is preparing to hunt with his warriors.”
I hurried through the forest, following my mate’s hazelnut scent.
“Mate. Mate. Mate. Mate.”
My wolf paced around restlessly inside of me. There was a trail of blood leading me toward the field. Ares’s blood. My chest tightened, throat closing up, and I started sprinting. I needed to get to my mate, needed to make sure he was okay.
And when I turned the corner, I saw him standing in the middle of a group of warriors. There were open and untreated wounds all over his tense and bloodied back.
“Ares,” I whispered ever so softly.
He turned his head and gazed at me, eyes a raging gold. “Kitten.”
Chapter 42
Aurora
Ares wrapped his arms around me, pulled me to his chest, and spun me. “I thought I’d lost you. I thought I’d fucking lost you,” he whispered against my neck, his breath warming my mark and making it tingle.
I pulled him closer to me and breathed in his hazelnut scent that always seemed to help me relax. Ares was safe and not another victim of the hounds. I could sleep well tonight.
“Call all the trackers you have after me home. They’re not safe out there.” I pulled away from him slightly and stared down at all the open wounds he hadn’t healed yet.
Shredded red chunks of flesh jutted out from a gash in his thigh as a thick layer of blood ran down his leg. My eyes widened slightly, and I shook my head. It had been hours since I last heard his howl … and he hadn’t had anyone treat him yet?
“We killed all the hounds, Aurora.” He brushed his fingers against my cheek as if he didn’t even feel the pain. “We’re safe.”
“We’re not safe.” I pressed my lips together. “There are still more of them out there. Tony is out there too.”
And I was going to kill that piece of shit when I found him.
Ares grasped my hands and ran his index finger over my knuckles. “Then, we’ll go find them. Right now. Get rid of them for good, for everything that they’ve done to us.”
“We can’t, Ares,” I said.
But I didn’t think leaving was his intention at all. If it were, he would’ve been storming toward the property edges, shouting at his warriors to prepare. Instead, everything in him seemed to soften.
He just stared at me with wavering human-brown to wolf-gold eyes, searching my face, as if he couldn’t believe that I was standing right in front of him. “Goddess, Aurora,” he whispered, pushing a strand of hair from my face. “I-I thought I’d lost you. I thought I’d never see you again. I thought you were dead.”
I tried my hardest to smile, but I couldn’t get myself to do it.
Ares had refused to heal his wounds, just so he could spend more time trying to find me. I appreciated the commitment he had to me, but I didn’t like how he had refused to help himself. It hurt to know that my mate would rather bleed to death than to heal himself and be strong. What would’ve happened to him if I had died out there?
After grabbing his hand in mine to show him that I was really here, I gazed at all the other warriors. “No more fighting today. Call everyone back home. Nobody leaves the property, and nobody enters it without permission.”
The warriors glanced at Ares and waited for orders. I expected Ares to say something, but he just continued to stare at me in disbelief, as if he didn’t even know there were others around.
Ares and Mars had always been in control and led with such power and authority. Seeing him lost for words and so scared didn’t sit right with me.
Marcel cleared his throat and stepped forward. “You heard our luna. Don’t make her say it again.”
When the warriors started to disperse, I nodded to Marcel and reminded myself to thank him later. I pulled Ares toward the hospital, where I would make sure the doctors healed him this time. But on our entire way there, I could hear his thoughts racing through his mind, his wolf begging him to tell me that he was okay and that all he wanted was to spend time with me.
Despite his silent pleas to take me home, I continued through the woods until Ares and I sat in a cold, bleak hospital room. He lay back in the bed and held my hand tightly, refusing to let go, even when a woman knocked on the wooden door.
Dressed in a long white coat, the doctor walked into the room with utensils and a bottle of clear gel. “We have been trying to get him to come in all morning,” she said, pulling up a chair next to his bed.
“All morning?” I asked, more to myself than to her.
It was true. Ares didn’t take care of himself when someone he loved was hurting. Charolette had mentioned it before, but we had been in the middle of something, and I hadn’t had a chance to really think about it. But now, it was right here, smacking me in the damn face.
My gaze drifted from his face tensed in pain to his deep thigh wound
s, and my heart ached. Ares had hurt himself before, and this was another form of self-harm.
After the doctor cleaned the wounds, she put some gel right on his raw flesh. “This will help him heal. It’s a special gel for werewolves.” She stitched every one of his wounds until they were closed. “Time to get you cleaned off, Alpha, so you’re not dirty for your mate.”
Ares went to stand to wash all the blood and dirt off his body, but I grabbed his hand before he could leave the room.
“I’ll do it,” I said, intertwining my fingers with his. “Thank you for everything, Dr. …”
She gave me a warm smile. “Dr. Anand.”
After I thanked her again, we walked out of the hospital and toward our pack house. The entire way, Ares held my hand tighter than usual to his chest and stayed quiet while I battled with all the dark thoughts running through my mind. All I could feel was hurt at the thought of my mate not caring about himself.
Why hadn’t I taken this more seriously earlier? Why couldn’t I see that the man who dealt pain also felt pain? Why hadn’t I tried to talk about this with him? Charolette had told me about his self-harm. She’d told me, and I hadn’t done a thing about it.
When we got home, I drew him a warm bath. “Get in.”
He stared at the tub and then at me. “Only if you get in with me.”
“No,” I said, voice coming out more stern than I’d intended. “Get in the tub.” He parted his lips to protest, but I didn’t want to fight with him about this. “Now, Ares. Don’t make me say it again.”
After a few moments, he pulled his shirt over his head, pushed down his shorts, and stepped into the water. “Can I take a shower?”
“Sit.”
When he finally submerged himself in the water, I knelt outside the tub, grabbed a soapy washcloth, and started to wash the blood off him. And when the water turned a musty red shade, I opened the drain and let more fresh water fill the tub. Dipping my feet into the bath with him, I sat on the edge and grabbed his arm, running the cloth against his forearm and seeing all those tiny little scars that I hadn’t noticed before.