OUTLAW'S BABY

by Amy Brent

  “I'm sorry, kiddo,” Amanda said, scooping James up and holding him against her hip. “You can come back and play tomorrow.”

  James made a frustrated sound as she carried him down the hall to their apartment. She set him down on the couch and did her best to clean the place up a bit before dinner. The apartment was eternally a mess, and she had long since given up on ever getting it truly clean. She just tried to maintain a certain level of disarray.

  “What do you want for dinner?” she asked as she looked through the cabinets.

  “Pizza.”

  “We don't have pizza,” she said. She considered using Max's $50 to order out, and save herself the hassle of cooking, but she really needed to put it towards paying off her credit card. “How about pasta? That's Italian, too.”

  James grumbled, but since he wasn't old enough to cook for himself, Amanda figured he could deal with her making whatever she wanted. She set the water to boil, then went into the living room to sit on the couch next to her son.

  He'd turned the TV on, and the Monday night football game was playing. She frowned at the TV. “Hey, isn't there cartoons on?”

  “No,” James said, pouting. “I wanna watch them play!”

  Amanda sighed and leaned back against the couch. James loved playing and running outdoors, though she rarely got the chance to take him out anymore. She didn't want to deny him the chance to watch the game, even if watching it brought back painful memories for her.

  James clutched his Nerf football to his chest as he watched the players running across the field. Amanda watched just one player in particular, the quarterback, Cole Reed. Michelle's brother.

  She sighed and leaned forward, propping her chin in her hands. She usually didn't want to admit it, but Cole was another reason why she'd been avoiding Michelle so much over the years. When they'd been in high school, Cole had been in college, and already making a name for himself playing for his college football team. Amanda had crushed on him pretty hard, mooning over him whenever he came back to town during school breaks. She'd been pretty sure he'd barely known that she existed, and she was even more sure now that he'd completely forgotten her entire existence. After all, they had just had one night together. The night she gave him her virginity.

  She glanced at James, the memories rushing back once more. She'd been a bit drunk, thanks to Cole and his college friends buying alcohol for Amanda and Michelle's high school graduation party. There had been dozens of kids there, including half of Cole's college football team who'd driven down for the party, and for the chance to score with some eager and willing high school girls. Amanda still didn't know if Cole had put the moves on her because she had been wearing a tight, low-cut dress that night, or because he'd been drunk enough to forget that she was his sister's best friend. And she hadn't cared what his reasons were. When he asked her to go upstairs, she'd been more than willing.

  The rest of the night after that was a blur. She remembered that it had felt amazing, after the initial pain, of course. She remembered Cole's stamina, how he'd wanted to go at it again and again. She remembered getting down on her knees for him, when she was too sore to let him inside her again, and how rough and controlling he'd been with his hand on the back of her head, forcing her to swallow.

  Most of all, she remembered that he'd been gone in the morning. She'd woken up, naked, sticky, and hung over, in his bed. After she'd gotten dressed and headed downstairs, Michelle had told her that Cole and his friends had driven back to their school. He hadn't even said goodbye.

  And Amanda hadn't seen him since. Well, except for when she saw him on TV. And when she looked at James – yes, she saw that resemblance! She'd never told Cole that he was the father, and had never told Michelle that she was an aunt. After how humiliated she'd been that he'd used her as a one-night stand, she had never been able to bring herself to admit the truth. Not to anyone.

  She could only hope that Cole wouldn't be at Michelle's wedding this weekend. It was hard for her to imagine him skipping his sister's wedding. But he hadn't been back home in years. After he'd been first draft pick right out of college, he'd been too absorbed in his success and fame to care about the town that he'd left behind. And she was certain that even if he did see her, he wouldn't even remember her name.

  Chapter 2

  Cole woke up to discover a naked woman draped across his body, drooling on his shoulder. He looked down at her, thinking that she definitely didn't look as hot now as she'd seemed last night. Maybe it was because he'd had a few beers after the game. Or maybe he'd been so high on the team's victory that he hadn't cared who he went to bed with.

  He pulled himself away from the woman and got out of the hotel room bed. He searched for his pants, and by the time he found them, the woman was waking up. She sat up in the bed, the blanket falling away from her naked body. Now that he got a better look at her from the neck down, he saw the appeal. Though he wondered what it said about him that he couldn't quite look her in the eye.

  “Hey,” she said, giving him a tired smile. “That was some night last night.”

  “Yeah,” he said noncommittally. “I guess.”

  Last night hadn't been anything special to him. Sure, he was always glad for the chance to score with one of the women that were always fawning all over him after a game. It was one of the perks of being the quarterback. But this woman hadn't left any more of an impression on him than any of the others had. Heck, he couldn't even remember her name.

  She got out of bed while he was pulling on his pants. She sauntered over to him and draped her arms around his shoulders. “Why in such a rush?” she asked. “I thought we could have another go before breakfast.”

  “Sorry, babe,” he said, pulling away. He grabbed his shirt and pulled it on. “I've got a flight to catch.”

  She frowned at him. “What, off to another game?”

  He snorted. “I wish. I have to head back home.”

  She planted her hands on her hips. “I see.”

  He rolled his eyes. “It's not like that. My sister's getting married, and for some reason, she decided to do it back home in New Jersey. So I've got to catch a plane back to East Bumblefuck.”

  “Whatever,” she said, waving her hands dismissively. “I should have known you were just another horny jock.”

  She pulled on her dress and headed to the door with her shoes in one hand and her panties in the other. She glanced at him from the door as she was shoving her panties into her purse. “See you around,” she said. “I guess.”

  Cole let out a long sigh, shaking his head. He could have been offended, but the girl had the right to be pissy with him. He hadn't taken the time to learn her name, or even buy her breakfast. He felt like a complete tool.

  He sat on the edge of the bed, pulling on his shoes and thinking about where he was in his life. Sure, he had a great sports career, and with it plenty of fame and plenty of money. And for the first couple of years, banging a different chick every night had been a great time. But after a while it was starting to get a bit stale. The sex was still physically good, but it was leaving him wanting something more.

  He tried to think back over all the women he'd been with in the last few years. He found he couldn't remember any of their names. Not a single one.

  He wracked his brain, trying to come up with a single name. The only one he could remember was...Amanda.

  He leaned back on his elbows, staring at the ceiling. Amanda. That was a name he hadn't thought about in a long time. His sister's best friend. He was pretty sure she'd had a crush on him for years before they finally shared that one night together. He'd had a bit of a thing for her himself. But over the years, whenever Michelle had caught him staring at her friend, she'd made a point to tell him there was no way it would happen. She'd lectured him on more than one occasion, telling him she knew the reputation he'd developed, even back in college, and how she was not going to let her best friend become just another one of his conquests. He'd protested more than once that
it wouldn't be like that...but then, he had probably been fooling himself.

  He still felt like a chump for leaving her that night. He'd gotten up early, while Amanda was still in his bed, and headed downstairs for some breakfast. Michelle had confronted him in the kitchen, accusing him of taking advantage of Amanda and using her while she was drunk and vulnerable. He'd been so drunk the night before that he couldn't remember who had initiated things, him or Amanda. But the way Michelle painted the picture, he'd practically been a predator, seducing the young, shy, virgin girl and luring her into his bed.

  After Michelle had finished berating him, he'd been so ashamed that he'd left without going back upstairs to even say goodbye. He'd felt bad about that for years. There had been more than one time, early on, that he'd asked Michelle about her, trying to keep up with how Amanda was doing, whether she was seeing anyone. But Michelle had refused to even give him Amanda's phone number, and she'd eventually told him to stop asking about her.

  He stared at the ceiling, wondering about how Amanda was doing. She'd been a sweet girl. Sure, it had only been one night. But even before that, whenever she was over at the house, studying with Michelle, he'd enjoyed her company. He remembered her being funny, and smart, and full of energy.

  If he was going to be back in town anyway, he wondered if maybe he could look her up. But...no, he knew he couldn't. Michelle would probably still be bad at him for seducing her friend and then leaving her after a one-night stand. And besides, Amanda had probably moved on. She'd been a beautiful and amazing girl. She must have found someone else by now.

  He got up and finished throwing the rest of his clothes into a bag, then headed downstairs to check out and head to the airport. Maybe he'd ask Michelle about her friend when he got into town. It couldn't hurt to ask.

  Chapter 3

  Amanda looked at herself in the mirror one last time. She was wearing a skimpy black dress she'd first bought more than two years ago for a date. The date, as she recalled, had ended badly, with the guy feeling her up in the front seat of his car while they were parked outside Amanda's apartment, then getting mad when she wouldn't invite him upstairs. She hadn't wanted to sleep with anyone on the first date—her experience with Cole had made her wary of one night stands—and she definitely wasn't going to bring anyone upstairs while her son was in the apartment with the babysitter.

  The dress was probably a little too flirty to wear to meet her friend's fiance, but it was the newest and nicest thing she owned. It had been years since she'd been able to afford new clothes, other than a few cheap pairs of jeans and t-shirts from Walmart. It was either this dress, or something that was old, frayed, and possibly stained. James had once had the bad habit of vomiting all over her clothes when he was an infant, and her wardrobe had never recovered.

  The doorbell rang. She hurried into the living room and scooped James up in her arms. “Come on, sweetie, you get to spend the night at Mrs. Carter's and play with Billy.

  She dropped her son off at the neighbor's, then headed downstairs. Michelle was waiting at the door, wearing an expensive-looking dress. It was hard to tell at a glance, but Amanda was guessing it was a designer label.

  “Hey, you!” Michelle squealed and took Amanda's hands, shaking them excitedly. “Oh my God, I've missed you so much!”

  “Hey,” Amanda said, trying to put as much enthusiasm into her voice as Michelle had in hers. “It's good to see you.”

  “I can't wait for you to meet Blake,” Michelle said. She led Amanda to the car. It was a luxury rental, and Amanda tried not to think about how much it must have cost. It was starting to look like Michelle was marrying money. Amanda was a little jealous.

  Amanda got into the backseat. Blake half turned in his seat to flash a smile at her. He was a gorgeous man, dressed in an expensive silk shirt and a black blazer. Even his designer sunglasses looked like they cost more than Amanda made in a week.

  “Blake, this is my absolute best friend ever, Amanda.” Michelle gestured from the front seat, a huge smile on her face. “Amanda, this is my man.”

  “Nice to meet you,” Blake said. He eyed her over the rim of his sunglasses for a moment, smiling flirtatiously. Then he turned around and put the car into gear. “I hope you brought your appetite.”

  “I'm starved,” Amanda said. She had skipped lunch when Michelle called to say that Blake insisted on taking them all out to dinner. She felt a little guilty about taking advantage of his generosity, but she planned to fill up at dinner as long as the meal was on Blake. Though from the looks of things, he could more than afford to treat them to a night out.

  Blake took them to a fancy restaurant in a part of the city Amanda never went into. She usually considered a night at Applebee's to be a luxury. This place was so upscale it made Applebee's look like her old high school cafeteria. They even took reservations, and someone at the front offered to take Blake's coat.

  They sat and ate, and at first the conversation was all about the wedding. Michelle went on and on about all of the last-minute planning that had gone into it, how they were flying in a photographer from Boston because they'd needed someone who could work on short notice, and how her dress was being shipped in from Paris. Amanda sat there, stunned, having a hard time processing how the girl she'd went to high school with had somehow managed to snag someone who was rich enough to spoil her like this.

  When there was finally a pause in Michelle's wedding-related rants, Amanda asked, “So, how did you two meet?”

  “Well,” Michelle said, “you remember how I told you I was doing everything I could to land a part in a commercial to jump-start my acting career?”

  “Yeah,” Amanda said, her face turning red. She distinctly remembered Michelle saying she'd be willing to sleep with a producer or director if it would get her a part.

  “Well, Blake here,” Michelle squeezed Blake's arm, flashing him a smile, “had some really fascinating projects in the works. He gave me a chance to audition, and, well, one thing led to another.” She shrugged, still smiling innocently. Though from the smirk on Blake's face, Amanda was pretty sure that Michelle's “audition” had been performed on her back.

  “So, did you get the part?” Amanda asked.

  Michelle waved her hand dismissively. “Oh, I've been too busy to worry about that sort of thing anymore. Besides, once we get married, I won't need to work. Blake's going to take care of me.”

  Amanda chewed on the inside of her cheek, trying not to stare at Blake. She had a hard time with the idea of him convincing Michelle to settle down and be the wife. No doubt he'd expect her to raise their kids, if they had any, while he continued focusing on his fabulous Hollywood career. But there had been a time when all Michelle could talk about was pursuing her acting career. If she had really given it up that easily, all for a man, then that was about the saddest thing Amanda could think of.

  But then again, Michelle looked happy. Amanda wasn't about to rain on her parade.

  “That's great,” Amanda said. She sipped at her wine, trying not to think about the price Blake had paid for it. “I hope you two are happy together.”

  “We are,” Michelle said, clinging to Blake's arm. “I've found the perfect man, and I couldn't be happier.”

  Blake shrugged and a smug smirk spread across his face. “Well, I guess she knew a good thing when she saw one.”

  Amanda fought the urge to roll her eyes.

  “So,” Michelle said, “the talk has all been about the wedding, and you haven't told me anything about you! How've you been?”

  Amanda shrugged and looked away, toying with her fork. She didn't much care to talk about how she was working two jobs to support her son, and how she hadn't been on a date, or even had a night out with friends, in almost a year. “I'm getting by,” she said. “You know how it is. But James is doing great. He's going to be starting preschool in the fall.”

  “Oh, that's great!” Michelle grinned wide. “I miss the little guy. You should have brought him with you.” />
  Blake shot Michelle a cautious look. “How old is he, exactly?”

  “Four,” Amanda said.

  Blake gave her a level stare. “Are you planning to bring him to the wedding?”

  Amanda frowned, grinding her teeth. “Well, yeah. It's kind of a big event. I'm sure he's going to love it.”

  “It's just,” Blake said, “I don't think there's really going to be any other kids there.”

  Amanda was about to snap and say that if her son wasn't welcome, she wouldn't be coming either. But Michelle interjected. “It'll be fine.” Michelle waved a hand dismissively. “He's old enough that he won't be crying or anything. Besides, he should be there when his Aunt Michelle gets married.”

  Amanda froze, a chill running down her spine. As far as she knew, Michelle had no idea that she was actually James's aunt. She was sure Michelle had just meant it figuratively, the way some kids referred to their mom's best friend as an aunt.

  Though it made Amanda remember her other big concern about the weekend. “Is Cole going to be there?”

  Michelle's expression dropped and she pressed her lips together in a thin line. “Yeah. Yeah, he is.”

  Amanda felt her face heat up.

  “Hey, I need to go to the bathroom,” Michelle said.

  “Me too.” Amanda got up to join her.

  Once they were in the privacy of the bathroom, Michelle started touching up her makeup in the mirror. “Is everything going to be okay with you and Cole?” she asked.

  “Yeah,” Amanda said, shrugging. “I mean, I guess so. It was a long time ago. I don't really care anymore.”

  “I was mad at him for a long time for what he did to you,” Michelle said. “I still can't believe he took advantage of you like that.”

  “Yeah,” Amanda said, letting out a nervous laugh. Looking back on it now, she wasn't sure whether she'd been taken advantage of. She'd wanted it. Wanted him. Wanted to give herself to him. If not for how he'd run out on her in the morning and never called again, she would have been happy.