by Steph
They’d clinched a playoff spot tonight with the win against the Maine Flying Foxes, whose mascot looked like the unfortunate mating of a chihuahua and a gerbil.
The game had been sweeter still because they’d played on home ice and the fans had gone crazy. The team had missed the playoffs the last couple of years so this was icing on the fucking cake.
“You played like a man possessed tonight, Conrad.” Cary smacked him on the back on his way to the showers. “Keep it up and we’ll have that cup.”
“Dude, you shut them down.” Jake dropped onto the bench next to him and watched as Shane pulled off his gear. “Guess getting dumped was actually good for you, yes?”
Shaking off his blocker, Shane gave Jake the finger without bothering to look at him. He wasn’t about to respond to that.
“You had a great game,” Shane tossed over his shoulder. “Congrats.”
“Ah, so we are still not discussing her. Okay. Yes, I did have a great game, thank you.”
Shaking his head, Shane listened to the other guys on the team razz Jake about his almost nonexistent humility while managing to compliment him at the same time.
Thinking he was safe from any more of Jake’s reminders of Bliss, he headed for the showers, where he stood under a scalding hot shower for at least five minutes.
It was part of his post-game ritual, which he’d let slide while he was with Bliss.
Should’ve been your first clue. Don’t change the routine for a girl.
His dad had drilled that one into his head all through high school. Not that he’d been in danger of that, but it’d stuck with him through juniors and into his years in the ECHL.
But he’d done it for Bliss and not noticed any harm. In fact—
He shook his head. Didn’t. Matter. Not one fucking bit because Bliss was gone.
And he was back to his routine and the team was winning and would continue to win.
“Hey, you heading straight home?” CJ stuck his head into the shower room, already showered and dressed. “I’m leaving now.”
“Yeah, I’ll be out in a few. Need a decent night’s sleep before the game tomorrow.”
They had another game against the Wolves tomorrow, and the other team would be out for payback.
“Okay. Oh, and just a heads-up. Bliss and Mike are in the hall. I’ll make sure Jake gets them out before you come through.”
His head shot up. “What the fuck?”
Justin Perry, the defenseman they’d just brought up from the ECHL after losing Joey Constantino to an injury last game, shot him a wary glance.
He knew he had a rep for being intense. Knew it was warranted. He also knew there was a fine line between intense and being an arrogant bastard. He’d always managed to walk it before. The tide could turn though.
Especially when he thought about Jake hitting on Bliss.
“No need to go psycho, dude. Jake sent the tickets to Mike. He didn’t know Bliss would be here.”
No fucking way did Jake not expect Mike to come without Bliss.
Bastard. Shane was gonna kill Jake. If he so much as laid a finger on her—
Shit. Shit.
Shane took a deep breath. That wasn’t fair. He knew Jake and Mike had hit it off. Jake had a brother with Down syndrome, whom he missed more than he’d ever admit to anyone. Except to Shane, one drunken night a few months ago.
“Sorry.” Shane shook his head. “Just…never mind. You don’t have to do anything. I’m fine.”
Shrugging, CJ waved. “Okay. See you at home.”
CJ disappeared and Shane hung his head, letting the water pound against the suddenly tense muscles of his back.
It’d been three days since she’d told him she didn’t want to see him again. Three days since he’d let her go without a fight.
Because she’d been right.
Their relationship had been going nowhere.
“Fuck.”
“Uh, you okay?”
Justin shut off his shower and rubbed a towel over himself, carefully avoiding Shane’s gaze.
Shane let out a big sigh. “Yeah. I’m fine. Good game tonight.”
“Thanks. You too. It’s good to be here.”
Shane didn’t want to be a dick but he had no interest in conversation. No, he was much more interested in what was going on in the hall.
“Glad to have you.”
Luckily, the new guy didn’t say anything else and walked away a second later. Leaving Shane alone in the showers.
He told himself he wasn’t standing here just so he could avoid her. He was soaking his tight muscles.
Yeah, right.
With a muttered curse, he shut off the water, toweled off, and headed back to the locker room.
He glanced at the clock, figuring he’d give Jake another five minutes to say goodbye to Mike and Bliss.
And give himself another five minutes to tell himself he really didn’t want to see her.
*
“Do you mind, Lissy?”
Bliss smiled and shook her head. “Of course, I don’t mind. Have fun.”
Jake touched her on the shoulder. “We’re just going to get something to eat at the West Reading Diner. We won’t be out late. We have a game tomorrow. If you guys can make it, I’ll make sure you’ve got tickets.”
Mike’s smile widened and she knew she couldn’t say no. It was almost like they were ganging up on her. But she couldn’t deny the friendship that had developed between Mike and Jake. She’d be suspicious of Jake’s motives if she hadn’t seen the way he treated Mike. There was no way she was going to throw up roadblocks to their friendship.
“I can get the bus in if you don’t want to come tomorrow, Lis.”
Because she was weak, she said, “No, I’ve got nothing going on. I can bring you.”
Jake nodded, his expression serious, but she could’ve sworn he was hiding a smile.
And then her brain fuzzed over. Because Shane walked out of the locker room.
Damn it. She’d wanted to be gone before he got out. He was typically one of the last guys to leave.
And her heart hurt to look at him because… Oh my god, the man took her breath away.
Tall and broad, dressed in the gray suit that fit him like a glove and the blue shirt that matched his eyes. He hadn’t bothered with his tie, which she was sure he had rolled up in his pocket.
His hair was still wet and he’d brushed it back from his face, which still bore the marks from his mask.
She had the opposing urges to run in the other direction and brush her fingers across those marks.
God, she’d been so stupid. She’d fallen for him. Hard. And she had no one to blame but herself.
As he came closer, she found herself sucking in a breath and holding it.
Which was so stupid because he barely nodded at her. He did stop to say hi to Mike and shake his hand but he left seconds later.
Her heart felt like he’d taken a knife and sliced right through it.
Still think giving him up was a good idea?
Absolutely. Because if it hurt this much after only a couple of months of dating, just think how much worse it would be after five or six months. Or a year.
Maybe…
She turned to watch him leave. Couldn’t help herself. Just like she’d been unable to take her eyes off him throughout the entire game.
Why are you torturing yourself?
Because she was an idiot. But that didn’t mean she wasn’t right.
*
“Jesus, Shane, you’re on fire. Dude, I don’t know what the fuck you took but whatever it is, I want some.”
Shane gave Nicky Thompson an acknowledging grin over his shoulder. The rookie forward from Ottawa had been a great addition to the team mid-season. The kid wouldn’t turn twenty-one for another six months but he played like a ten-year pro.
“That’s what happens when you don’t have a life.” Lad was already on his way to the showers after their final game of the season. “
The Brick Wall eats, sleeps, and breathes hockey, son. Take notes.”
Shane had a response on the tip of his tongue, one that would’ve made everyone laugh. But he just couldn’t come up with the energy to care.
So he acknowledged the catcalls from the rest of the guys with a wave but stayed silent as he stripped off his gear.
The noise of the locker room faded in and out as the guys moved from here to the showers and back. Coach had already told him the local reporter and the AP stringer wanted to talk to him so he hustled. He knew the writers would wait however long it took, but he hated to keep them waiting. They had deadlines and he…would go home to a lonely bed and try to sleep without dreaming about Bliss.
Shit.
When he got out of the shower, only a few guys remained, including Jake.
“You should probably not go into the green room looking like you just ate puppies and kittens for dinner. You’ll scare the pretty blonde with the tape recorder. New AP stringer. Much better-looking than the old dude they used to send.”
Jake was already dressed as Shane hung the last of his equipment and wrapped a towel around his waist.
Shane spared him a glance, noting the bag he held in his hands. “You going out?”
“Yes. Mike and I are going to get some dinner and then I will meet the guys at that bar in West Reading. The one that’s always empty. I can never remember its name.”
Jake couldn’t remember its name because it had some weird Native American spelling that no one but people from the area could pronounce properly.
“You want to meet us there?” Jake asked.
Shane automatically shook his head. “I’m tired. Need to get some sleep.”
Jake didn’t move but he didn’t say anything either. Most of the other guys had already left.
“What?” Shane shot Jake a glance, frowning. “What’s wrong?”
“You are.” Jake crossed his arms over his chest, looking like he was digging in for a fight. “You need to snap out of this.”
“Snap out of what? Christ, I’m playing the best I’ve played in years.”
“I am not arguing with that. But Shane, you are miserable. Everyone can see it. No one wants to say anything because you are playing amazing. But man, there’s more to life than hockey. Even during the playoffs. I mean, what good is winning if you sleep alone every night?”
“Jesus, Jake. Just leave it the hell alone.”
Shane yanked his undershirt over his head…and ripped the damn neckline out.
The few guys left in the locker room gave him sidelong glances but quickly looked away again.
“Fuck.”
Jake rocked back on his heels, his expression unchanged as Shane finished dressing…without the t-shirt.
“She misses you, too. And the way you’re playing… Well, she’s sure she made the right decision.”
Frustration raged through him. “So what? I’m supposed to lose a few games so she’ll come back to me? That’s the stupidest fucking thing—”
“Damn, you are blind.” Jake shook his head. “You only need to show her how much you love her. And play like you’re playing now. Show her you can do both.”
How much you love her.
Were his feelings that fucking obvious? They must be if Jake had picked up on them. But no way in hell was he about to admit it.
“Jake…Jesus.”
“No, I am not. But I do know what I’m talking about. You have to make sure you show her you are worth it. And then you have to be.”
Chapter Eight
The flowers showed up at the shop Monday. A bouquet of daisies.
No card. Just two tickets to the first playoff game. The Redtails opened at home this Saturday. Mike already had his ticket. Jake had hooked him up. Mike had asked if she wanted to go with him, that he would ask Jake for another ticket. She said no. She had to. It was just too hard to see Shane.
Mike didn’t need her to get to the games. He was perfectly capable of getting there himself.
That didn’t mean she didn’t want to go.
“Ooh, Bliss, honey. Those are beautiful. Got a new beau I haven’t heard about?”
Bliss gave her Aunt Rosie a distracted smile. “No. I’m pretty sure they’re from Shane.”
“Oh. Did you two get back together?”
“No. I haven’t seen him since we…since I broke up with him.”
“So why the flowers?”
“There’re tickets to the first playoff game.”
“Ah. The flowers are beautiful. And there’s so many of them.”
Rosie was right. There were fifteen total.
“That’s an odd number.” Rosie looked at her with a frown, her short dark hair swinging around her face. “Does the number mean anything?”
Bliss shook her head. “Not that I can think of.”
“Huh. Well, obviously it means something to Shane.”
Rosie was right. It did mean something to Shane. She just wasn’t sure what and what it might have to do with her.
“So are you going to the game?” Rosie asked.
“I don’t know.”
With a sigh, Rosie finished hanging a dress for a first fitting later this morning before she turned to Bliss. “Honey, I know you said you don’t want to talk about it but…you know you can tell me anything, right? It seemed like you really liked Shane. Did he do something? Was he—”
“No. No, it was nothing Shane did. It was me.”
Rosie reached across the counter and patted Bliss on the hand. “Tell me, hon. You’ve been walking around here like a ghost for the past few weeks. What happened?”
She shook her head. “Nothing happened. I just realized I needed to break it off before…” She sighed. “Before he leaves. He’s eventually going to move on. And I’ll still be here.”
“And why do you think you need to stay here?”
“My life’s here. My job, my family.”
Rosie made a face. “Oh, hon. You’re smart enough to get a job anywhere. And your family will always be here for you. There’s no reason you have to stay tied to this little corner of the world. I love working with you and you know you’ll always have a job with me but I don’t remember hearing you talk about wanting to run a bridal salon when you were young.”
Nose wrinkling, Bliss shrugged. “I was always changing my mind about what I wanted to do when I was young. I went to college and got a business degree because…”
“Because what?”
Because she’d had no idea what she wanted to do with her life. Except she’d known she needed to be able to support herself. Especially after she’d gotten herself untangled from her ex.
Had she been hiding here? Afraid to go out and do something else?
No, that wasn’t it. She loved living here, in this town. Where her parents lived fifteen minutes away and her nieces and nephews ran to hug her when she babysat. Where she lived next door to her brother.
“Because I didn’t know what else to do with myself.”
Rosie humphed. “I don’t believe that for a second. You’re no little lost girl. Maybe you just haven’t found what you want to do with your life yet but that doesn’t mean you won’t ever. And don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying having a man will fix all your problems. I just don’t want you to count them out of the equation totally. Especially one you really like.”
*
“So have you figured out where she’s sitting yet?”
Lad sat next to him on the bench, watching Shane lace his skates. His teammate had waited until Shane took out his earbuds before speaking. Everyone knew not to talk to him until he’d did.
The noise of the sold-out crowd reached them back in the locker room, stoking the players’ excitement even higher.
The final series started tonight. They’d won the first series with a sweep. The second series had gone five games. The semifinals had gone six.
Shane was praying they broke the pattern and took this series in five games. That allowe
d for the other team to win one and for the Redtails to win at home. Of course, a sweep would be nice, too.
“No. I only know she’s using the tickets.” He shrugged. “Don’t wanna know.”
“You sure? Jake could ask Mike—”
“No. I know she’s here. That’s good enough.”
“You really like her, don’t you?”
Shane pulled his jersey over his head then gave Lad a look, which had Lad holding up his hands.
“Just an observation. Don’t take my head off.”
“Don’t be fucking with his head before the game.” CJ smacked his glove across Lad’s shins. “He doesn’t need to be thinking about anything but the game.”
Actually, he’d been thinking about Bliss a lot lately and it hadn’t affected his game at all. As a matter of fact, thinking about Bliss got him out of his head when he started getting too wrapped up in the game.
He didn’t get to tell the guys that though, because the coach came in to give his last remarks.
Then he heard the crowd begin to roar and knew they only had a few seconds before he needed to lead the guys onto the ice.
Standing, he walked to the door, hearing the guys line up behind him. Nobody spoke but he heard Lad praying under his breath in Russian directly behind him. Shane had no idea what Lad was saying but he crossed himself when Lad muttered, “Amen.”
And started down the hall.
*
“Holy crap, I didn’t think this place could get any louder but damn.” Faith had to raise her voice to be heard. “I think my ears are going to bleed.”
Bliss nodded and leaned in to speak closer to Faith’s ear. “I know. It’s amazing, isn’t it?”
The sold-out crowd had been cheering since the start of the video showing highlights of the previous season and ending with solo shots of the team. Her heart stuttered every time Shane’s picture appeared on the Jumbotron above the ice.
“I’m so glad you forced me to come to these games with you.”
Faith’s smile made Bliss put her arm around her friend’s shoulders. “I’m glad you’re enjoying it.”
Bliss had had to exchange the tickets Shane had sent her for handicapped access seats but the ticket office rep had been more than happy to make that happen.