by Alana Serra
"I'll let Verkiir know. God, Addi. Were you working on that all day?" Meg frowned at her, her brow knitting in concern.
"And most of the night," Addison mumbled. When Meg's eyes widened, she added, "You shouldn't be surprised by this."
"I'm not, but... there's more to life than work."
That simple, well-meant piece of advice unsettled Addison, bringing up all those fears that had resurfaced that morning. She'd never liked that phrase. It was so… reductive. Of course there was more to life than work, but her work was important.
"Not when it's this kind of work," she countered. "If I hadn't worked late, who knows what would have happened to Vazik."
Meg approached her, taking Addison's hands into her own. "I know," she said softly. "Thank you. I just… want you to have time for yourself."
She hadn't had time for herself since university, and even that was stretching it. There was too much to be done, and too few people to do it.
"After we address this. We don't know if this issue is widespread yet, and if it is, lots of kits' implants will need adjustments."
More than she'd thought last night. When the Matchmaker program was started, they'd seen massive success. Mates were paired up across all the Waystations and kits were conceived in that first month, mere weeks after Vazik was conceived. It would be time for their implant fitting soon, and if the genetic markers were altered in all new implants…
God, there was no way they'd be able to change all of them in a timely fashion. And if there was someone behind this--if someone was trying to sabotage the future of the Karuvar and the humans--they couldn't waste time fussing with individual strings of code.
She needed to talk to Kor'ven. She needed to convince him to approach Drol'gan, no matter what it took.
And she had a feeling she was going to have to get them both on board with changing the master code--the code that was used to create all implants. A code few knew, and one Karuvar considered sacred; untouchable.
"Thank you for the clothes and the coffee," Addison said, squeezing her friend's hands, "but I have a lot to take care of today."
Grabbing a spare coat, Addison started toward the door of her office, trying to formulate some kind of plan.
"Remember what I said, Addi."
She smiled at Meg, but the expression faded as soon as she was out the door. She couldn't have a normal life. Everything that was happening was just more proof.
Kor'ven would understand. At least on an intellectual level.
Beyond that… she couldn't afford to think about right now. Not when there was so much at stake.
13
The moment Addison left her office, she noticed a peculiar feeling that pricked at the edge of her consciousness. It was the same sort of feeling one experienced when they could feel someone watching them, only this was pleasant; comforting. As she considered it, she realized it could only be one thing: Kor'ven. She could feel him now, could feel where he was, what his mood was. It was almost like being able to sense an aura, and right now, Kor'ven's was as warm as the mid-morning sun.
Addison followed that feeling straight to the tech lab. A fortunate thing, as she wasn't sure she could handle being with Kor'ven in her own lab today. She was already blushing at the prospect of seeing him again.
She noticed though that when she got closer to him, her heart felt lighter. The worries of her work felt less pressing. On some conscious level, she knew that feeling was deceptive. Biology just wanted her to settle down and make babies and not worry her precious little head over complicated things like science.
But frankly, biology could go screw itself.
When she entered the lab, Kor'ven was working at a terminal. He wasn't alone this time, but his presence nearly blinded her to everyone else. He looked up immediately from his work and gave her a genuine smile that was full of affection and so different from the condescending expression he normally wore that Addison couldn't help but smile back.
Kor'ven approached her and, much to her eternal surprise, he lifted his hands to either side of her neck, his thumbs resting against her jaw as he tilted her head up. Before she could breathe a word of protest--and she wasn't even sure she was going to--he kissed her.
It was so unexpected that it completely took her breath away. She could feel her muscles lose some of that tension they were carrying around as she melted into him, her hands resting on his chest. She lost herself in that kiss, completely forgetting they weren't alone until someone cleared their throat.
And still Kor'ven didn't relent. She was the one who had to pull back, her face and neck flushed. His darkened gaze told her he would have been more than happy to pick up where they left off last night, despite their audience.
Addison bit her lip, that brain fog returning. She'd come here for a reason, dammit.
"Did you sleep well, my mate?" Kor'ven asked.
"I… believe so, yes." Addison shot a glance to one of the junior scientists who was watching them. He turned bright red and went back to his work. "I'm uncertain how I ended up in my office, but--"
"I brought you there," he said, pride in his voice.
She had assumed as much, though now she wondered if he'd carried her just as she was, naked and sated through the halls of the Waystation. Most of the staff would have gone home by then, but not all of them.
"I have adjusted the code of Vazik's implant, so you do not need to trouble yourself with it."
Addison's gaze snapped back to him, that one phrase doing wonders to cut through the strange, floaty headspace she found herself in.
"Troubling myself with such things is my job, Kor'ven." She lowered her voice so only he could hear. "And if you think one night is going to get me to give that up…"
Kor'ven's own expression sobered, some of that facade returning. "Of course not."
Guilt stabbed at her, but she wasn't about to beg forgiveness for that assumption. She shouldn't have to.
"Thank you for taking care of that," she said, compromising, "but we need to discuss our next move with regard to what we discovered last night."
For the first time, Kor'ven seemed to realize that they weren't alone. "Not here," he said. "Let us take a walk."
A walk at Waystation Helios--a private one, at least--meant leaving the facility entirely. She made her departure known to Ashley and walked with Kor'ven along the basin that encompassed the building.
"I've been thinking about the realities of what we're dealing with," Addison began, "and I just don't think manual code change is feasible. So many kits are going to be in need of implants soon, and we don't know how long they can go before we're able to get them working properly."
Kor'ven's hands were folded behind his back and his tail swished in a lazy arc behind him. "How do you suggest we counter this?"
Addison drew in a breath. What she was going to suggest wasn't going to be easy. They'd need a very specific type of person to pull it off, and there were pitfalls at every turn. Yet it still felt like their best bet.
"I believe we need to adjust the master code."
His response was immediate. "Absolutely not."
"Absolutely not?" she stopped, looking up at him. "I know you understand the importance of this."
"I do, and I also understand the risks inherent in tampering with the master code. You wish to overwrite any adjustments that were made to the new implants, yes?"
"And add some kind of safeguard so this doesn't happen again," she said.
"But in the process of doing that, you are overwriting and adding code to the implants of every single human and Karuvar."
She pursed her lips, her temper flaring somewhat. The arrogance and condescension she'd found so attractive last night was grating on her now.
"It's not as if I'm suggesting one of us goes in and makes a few quick alterations. Drol'gan can bring in the best programmer he can find. They will make certain the code is stable and that it's not going to cause any problems before it's uploaded to all implants."
"D
rol'gan will never approve this," he said with a finality that Addison absolutely detested.
"He will if we provide a convincing argument."
She watched as Kor'ven began to walk away, her eyes narrowing at his back. He wasn't walking quickly, nor was he far from her. She could feel his displeasure, too, and how conflicted he was over this. She could see it in the droop of his ears, the agitated thrashing of his tail.
Addison let out a breath. She wasn't entirely sure how to be… comforting, but it was worth a try. Catching up to him, she rested a hand on his back and rubbed what she hoped were soothing circles.
"What are you afraid of?" she asked softly.
"I have tampered with the code before. The results were disastrous."
Of course. He'd told her that last night, the story of his mate and unborn kit, claimed by a program that never should have been sanctioned. Addison frowned, stepping in front of him so she could look into his eyes.
"This isn't the same thing," she reassured him. "We aren't trying to play God, we're just trying to fix a massive breach as efficiently as possible so we can figure out who's behind it."
Kor'ven was silent for a time, his gaze cast toward the ground. When he looked back at her, there was something in his eyes that took her breath away for the second time that morning.
"Very well. We will speak to Drol'gan."
"Absolutely not. My sire toyed with the power of the Stars, and I shall not make his mistake."
Addison sat in a conference room with Kor'ven, Drol'gan, and no one else. Drann had been dismissed when talk turned toward altering the master code, and even the Pathfinder's bodyguards were waiting outside.
She thought that meant they would be able to reach him without as much red tape, but evidently that assumption was wrong.
"This is a serious threat," she said, stressing the word as much as she could. "We have to address it quickly."
"I agree. Which is why I will deploy more Karuvar scientists to assist in altering the code on an implant-by-implant basis."
Addison glanced at Kor'ven. Aside from the initial explanation, he'd been surprisingly quiet during this meeting. Perhaps he was afraid of rocking the boat, but Addison had no such fear.
"Doesn't that seem terribly inefficient to you? If we expend resources on something we could literally have one person handle in a matter of days, we'll have no one left to investigate the matter."
Addison had learned years ago that Drol'gan had something of a dual personality. In public, he was incredibly charming and charismatic. He was like that in private, too, for the most part. But when he felt crossed, his smile turned into something hard and neutral, his black eyes seemed endlessly devoid of leniency, and he cut an imposing figure--even when he was sitting.
But she would not allow herself to be intimidated. Not on this.
"My primary concern is the safety of the kits, Doctor Monroe," he said. "I will increase security, and such a presence should allow us enough time to resolve this issue before we move forward with an investigation."
She stared at him, agape, unable to believe what she was hearing. And still Kor'ven hadn't said a word.
"With all due respect, Pathfinder, this course of action is short-sighted, and I cannot believe it is what's best for either of our species."
She could feel Kor'ven's unease as Drol'gan rose from his seat. He was tall, even for a Karuvar. Addison had never gotten the feeling that he would ever be violent without threat, and she didn't have that feeling now. Still, his movement unsettled her and she watched silently as he crossed to the window.
"I do not fault you for your conviction, Addison, but you must understand that the Karuvar are not like you."
She blinked at him, taken aback by this answer.
"Our science, our religion, they are not separate and opposing entities. The master code is… the lifeblood of all Karuvar. It is sacred to us."
"I understand that, but--"
"--And just as humans would not allow us to tamper with their sacred texts, I cannot allow you to tamper with ours."
Addison was stunned. Of course she knew the master code was an item of great importance, but he was acting just as Kor'ven had. As if she was just going to do a quick smash-and-grab and write over the numbers in crayon.
She believed in God, and she believed in Science. Those two things were not opposed in her mind. But to refuse to alter the master code… it just wasn't comprehensible to her.
"I'm sorry, but I--"
"Addison." Kor'ven's voice was clear and firm, and she turned to him with wide eyes. "It is done. The Pathfinder has made his decision."
Two sentences, spoken with little to no emotion. Addison had always considered herself to be thick-skinned, but those words pierced her heart, tearing holes into the walls she'd carefully repaired after her mother's death.
Drol'gan spoke again. He might have even apologized. But she didn't actually hear the words. Her attention was still fixed on Kor'ven, her mind still frozen on the choice he made.
Loyalty over cold, hard facts. Tradition over what was clearly best for everyone involved. Drol'gan over her.
"Thank you for agreeing to see me," she said numbly.
And then, without another word, she got up and left the room.
14
Kor'ven knew it was foolish to buy into the idea that things would be different once he was mated--truly mated. It was foolish, and yet the thought held some merit, or seemed to earlier in the day. After he had carried Adi'sun to her office, he lay with her, holding her small, peaceful form. He spent much of the night stroking her hair and watching her sleep until he too drifted off.
And when he woke again, he instantly noticed the change. Even when he rose to dress, he could still feel her as if she were in his arms. He could still feel her as he moved about the Waystation, and even when he left to take care of the code adjustments so she would not have to handle such a menial task. He had never had that sensation with his first "mate."
It was reassuring. Calming. Kor'ven had worked with an ease he had never felt in his life, and when she awoke and came to find him, it was like the sun rising over the canyon. He'd been unable to contain himself, unable to keep from kissing her, touching her. Had she not stopped him, he might have stolen her away to a dark corner someplace where they might recreate last night.
But the moment she suggested they edit the master code, he'd known the stories elders told, stories of one's life changing completely after mating, were entirely fabricated. Mating did not change the fact that he and Adi'sun were from two different worlds. It did not change the fact that she could not and would not understand why he had taken Drol'gan's side in that room.
And it did nothing to dampen the abject fury he felt coming off of her as he exited into the hallway.
"How could you do that?" she asked, and though her tone was measured, he could sense her turbulent emotions. "We were supposed to approach him as a united front."
Kor'ven's jaw squared and he glanced at the closed door. No doubt Drol'gan could still hear everything.
"I never promised such a thing, only that I would join you in speaking to him."
She gave him an incredulous look, her blue eyes wide with hurt and anger. "You call what you did in there speaking to him? You said all of ten words until the end."
"Adi'sun…" He reached for her, but she took a step back.
"Don't. This may not be a big issue to you, but it's a huge issue to me. You know this is the right thing, Kor'ven," she hissed. "You know it's the right thing, and you're bending to the Pathfinder's decision anyway."
Kor'ven's nostrils flared, his brow ridge coming down close over his eyes. He had been prepared to allow his mate to take out her fury on him, but this was too far.
"I am quite capable of making my own decisions." He threw the words back at her, only noticing afterward that several people had stopped to watch them in the hall. "I will not discuss this here."
Adi'sun looked around, seeing t
he same thing he did. Her face was flushed, but he could tell it was almost entirely from anger.
"My office, then," she managed, leading the way.
Once they were inside, she pulled down the window coverings and locked the door, granting them as much privacy as was possible in the Waystation. Kor'ven stood near the wall, watching her pace.
"This is dangerous. It's careless. And it's so very, very wrong. How can you not see that?" she asked, finally turning back to him.
Kor'ven considered himself a rather reserved individual. He kept much of his emotion locked behind a heavy blast door. But that door had started to bow and buckle the moment he met Adi'sun, and now he could feel it giving way.
"How can you not see the same is true of altering the master code? It is dangerous. It is careless. And it is very, very wrong."
"I'm not trying to encroach upon your spirituality, but--"
"It has nothing to do with belief!" he roared. "I am not opposed to your idea because that code is sacred, I am opposed to your idea because I have done this before. I have altered code, I have tried to make the Karuvar better, more resilient, and I have seen us get weaker with every adaptation. I have played an active role in bringing about what I believe will be the end of my people."
She knew these things. Perhaps he had not shared this hypothesis with her--that he believed the Karuvar grew weaker with every adaptation they programmed into their implants. But he had shared his greatest failure, his greatest mistake. The decision he was most ashamed of.
And she was throwing it back in his face, chasing her own theory rather than trusting his past experience.
Even now she did not understand. She was looking at him as if he were absolutely mad.
"The Karuvar are… a marvel of bio-engineering. Your people are the strongest species in every known galaxy. You have survived for longer than most species have even existed. How can you possibly claim to be weak?"
Kor'ven's heart ached to hear her speak in such a way. After last night, there was no doubt in his mind that she was his mate. But this was his life's work, the one thing he believed in more than anything else. And she was dismissing it.