by Lilia Moon
“I can’t. Shower. Please.” I take a deep breath and stare hard at a wall. “I’m smelly and totally not sexy. I can’t do this.”
He swats my bottom. “You smell like you had a night of very satisfying sex, and if I want to go caveman on you and lick that up, then that’s exactly what I’ll do.” His fingers are reaching between my legs, and his growl at what he finds there is very satisfied. “However, I have other intentions this morning.”
He pulls a stool over, and presses his hand into my lower back, making very clear what he wants. “Bend over. Lean on this.”
My body is moving, even though my brain still objects. Loudly. I lean over, every cell of me trembling.
I’m about to have sex in my kitchen.
This does not happen to people like me.
Daniel’s foot nudges mine apart as his fingers play in my pussy. “I love how fast you get wet for me. You’re still swollen from last night. All pink and wet and beautiful.”
I have no idea how I can feel stinky and sexy at the same time.
Chapter Twenty-Five
Daniel
We are dealing with this negative thinking of hers. Right after I fuck her silly. Or maybe not quite that far. I can feel the beginnings of a plan forming.
However, first things first.
I praise my sleepy brain for remembering to grab a condom before I left the bedroom, and work it on one-handed while I keep playing with her pussy. She’s bent over a stool in her own kitchen, still looking moderately horrified, but she’s sopping wet under my fingers.
I smile at her sexy ass as it starts to wiggle. Being a Dom is really good for some things. I slide the head of my cock into her pussy. This time I’m coming in slow.
She moans and arches her back, trying to pull me in faster.
I slap her ass lightly. “How I want, when I want.”
She growls, which only makes me laugh and slide in even more slowly. By the time I make it all the way to the hilt, she’s got a frustrated circular wiggle going on that’s totally driving me nuts.
I swat her again. “Be still.” And then I pull out and slide back in, a lot faster this time.
Her moan is enough to wake a dead man.
I grab her hips and let myself thrust fast and hard for a bit, driving her up and making us both a little crazy.
I hear my beginnings of a plan tighten up into something definite, and I curse under my breath. It sounds like a damn bad idea. It means leaving happy, wet pussyland.
The plan doesn’t budge.
I thrust a few more times in a rhythm that will keep both of us close to the edge, but won’t push either of us over. She tolerates it for a bit, and then she arches her back and whimpers. “Daniel. Please.”
I slide in and out a few more times and let my unspoken message ring loud and clear. Not your choice, sweet sexy sub.
Her next whimper is a lot more frustrated—but it has nothing on the one when I pull out completely. She looks back over her shoulder, totally confused, as I roll off the condom. “Why are you stopping?”
I grin and swat her irresistible ass. “You get the rest after we eat breakfast and talk. Maybe.”
“What?” She stands up, and her whole face reads like a cranky teenager who just lost her favorite gadget.
Time to get this show on the road. Carrots and sticks. “I want you to understand just how desirable you are. So from now on, anytime we’re together in a reasonably private space, I might slide my cock into you. Maybe I’ll do something more than that, maybe I won’t. But you’re about to learn just how often I’m hard for you.” Because cocks don’t lie, and mine really likes this woman.
She stares at me as I open drawers and dig out a frying pan.
I walk over and kiss her cheek. “The second part of this is that whenever you have negative thoughts about how desirable you are, you’re going to tell me, and I’m going to swat your ass. Just hard enough and long enough to help you remember.”
I deliver a couple right where she stands. “Those are for thinking you might smell bad this morning.”
Her cheeks are pink, and she hasn’t said a word.
It might be a good idea to keep her that way for a bit. “Go have a shower while I make breakfast.”
The look on her face is priceless.
I kiss her and try not to laugh. “I won’t break your kitchen, I promise.”
Chapter Twenty-Six
Gabby
When I walk back into my kitchen, my robe tied tightly around my waist and my wet hair hanging down my back, I notice two things. The kitchen is spotless. And something smells stupendously good. “That’s not soufflés.”
Daniel grins from a stool at the counter where my girls always eat. “Nope. Omelettes. With some of the leftover roast squash and caramelized onions thrown in for good measure.”
That’s real food. “You know how to cook?”
He looks amused. “I’m a forty-five-year-old bachelor who hasn’t died yet. What do you think?”
I have a class full of guys at Fettered who bely his claim, but I have eyes on what he’s made now, and he can most certainly cook.
I go to hitch my leg up on a stool.
His hands stop me. “Take off your robe, sweetheart. Let me look at you while I eat.”
I imagine what my naked belly rolls look like when I sit. Not a chance.
He clears his throat and gives me a meaningful look. “Anything you’re supposed to be telling me?”
Oh no. His words went round and round in my head in the shower, and they’re back with a vengeance. “You weren’t really serious about that part.”
His hand goes under my chin. “I was. These negative thoughts get in the way of my pleasure and yours. A smart vanilla guy would suggest you get some therapy. I’ve got a faster method. Drop the robe and hand over your ass.”
This is insane.
He smiles and strokes my cheek. “It’s not punishment, Gabby. Just a reminder. Like those elastic bands some people snap on their wrists to get over bad habits.”
I glare at him. “I don’t like this idea.”
He’s sliding the robe off my shoulders. “Isn’t it worse to keep thinking nasty, untrue things about your body?”
Damn him. I turn sideways. “This is really embarrassing.”
He puts one hand on my belly to hold me still and delivers four stinging swats to my naked bottom. Then he lifts me into his lap. “There. Done.” He spears a bite of omelette with a fork and holds it to my lips. “Here, taste it.”
I take the bite and lean into his chest as I chew. “This is the weirdest breakfast ever.”
He laughs and nuzzles my cheek. “Consider yourself lucky. You almost got burnt omelettes and shower sex.”
His words make me wet—right on top of his bare thigh. I groan and cover my face with my hands. And then I force myself to talk my confusion out loud where he can hear it. “This isn’t me beating up on myself, but I’m a grandmother who bakes cookies and helps brides pick out pretty flowers for their weddings. I don’t eat breakfast naked in someone’s lap and hope I can convince him to try shower sex later.”
“Beautiful Gabby.” He kisses my forehead, my cheek, my ear. “So far out of your comfort zone.”
Something deep inside me unknots at the sympathy in his voice. “Yes. I really like it and I’m really overwhelmed, and sometimes overwhelmed is winning.” Pretty much any time he isn’t touching me, and sometimes even when he is.
He puts the omelette plate and a glass of water in my hands. “Here, hold these.” He stands up, me and breakfast in his arms, and carries us all over to the couch.
I sit quietly as he sets down the plate and glass and covers us both with my favorite fuzzy orange blanket.
His thumb strokes my cheek. “Better?”
It is, mostly because he’s treating me with such gentle understanding. “Yes, thank you.”
He feeds me another bite of omelette. “There’s so much I want here, but I’m far too used
to grabbing whatever I want. Thank you for speaking up.”
This is the same man who calmly staked his claim to spank me whenever he wants. “You make my head spin.”
This time it’s the water glass he’s offering me. “That’s not such a bad thing, but it’s definitely time for us to talk about some of the things I’ve been doing to set you spinning.”
His hand is stroking my back, even as he does an excellent job of getting us both fed. With an omelette that clearly says he found my kitchen herbs as well as my onions. “What did you put in this—lemon oregano?”
He smiles. “Chef’s secret. Talk to me about last night. How did the restraints feel?”
I laugh and say the first thing that comes to my mind. “Complicated, even though you made it look so easy.” And suddenly, thinking of all the ropes I saw, I shiver.
He catches my chin in his hand. “What was that?”
I’m feeling my way through it, because I’m not actually sure. “I think I just finally saw it as equipment, and I got scared.”
He’s listening so carefully. Taking everything I say so seriously.
I swallow and pull my fear out of the dark and shadows and give it a name. “I took a tour of Fettered before we started holding weddings there. It was one of Damon’s requirements for anyone who wanted to be inside the club while members are present.”
He’s nodding like that makes perfect sense.
“Ari and Doxy did my tour, and they were so sweet, but some of the equipment is really scary.” I close my eyes. “I feel like a wimp saying this, and I’m scared I’m going to disappoint you after you’ve been so willing to give me this chance to experiment, but I don’t think I want most of that.”
His hand tangles gently in the curls of my hair. “Gabby, one of the absolute hardest things to do in this lifestyle is to tell the truth, even when it feels really uncomfortable. You just did that, which makes you anything but a wimp.”
He’s making this so easy for me. “I wanted to try some of what’s making Emily and Scorpio look so happy, and I think I understand a bit of what that is now.” I breathe out, trying to dislodge the sadness in my chest. “I know people can learn to like things. Emily really likes spankings, and Ari teases Scorpio about something she calls a baby flogger, which maybe doesn’t sound so bad. But Emily likes to be in the dungeon, even if she doesn’t like to do anything in there. I don’t even want to visit.”
I take a deep breath and look up and face the music and the man I don’t want to sing it to. “I guess that means I’m really just a vanilla person.”
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Daniel
I waited way too long to have this talk, and she’s suffering because I screwed up. Twenty-five years of practice and I made one of the most basic mistakes there is. One I intend to fix right now. “Tell me how the restraints felt for you.”
She gives me a confused look, but she answers. “Part of me wanted to fight, to say that nobody gets to treat me like this, to take away my freedom to move.” She leans into my chest, chewing on her lower lip. “But once I realized I couldn’t go anywhere and you could do whatever you wanted, and yet you were so clearly focused on me—”
I wait, because the words she’s digging for are so important.
“I raised three girls all by myself. That’s a job you never really get to put down.” She tips back her head, eyes full of soft gratitude. “Last night I got to put everything down.”
She’s such a treasure. “And I got to be there while you did it.” I hope she sees the same thing in my eyes as I see in hers. “The restraints and everything else in Fettered’s dungeon are just tools, ways to encourage a sub’s surrender. They don’t work unless you choose to let it happen. You were incredibly generous with me last night.”
She laughs. “We might have a different opinion on that. I feel totally spoiled.”
“That means we’re doing it right.” I hug her in tighter, because an armful of naked, willing Gabby is about the best thing there is. “This is why people play with kink, sweetheart. To get to that place where we both got our needs met in a way that doesn’t happen if we’re trying to share the reins. The toys we use to get there don’t matter at all.”
She’s staring at me.
“I’m not all that attached to labels anymore, but you do kinky sex beautifully.” I run my fingers along her collarbone. “I haven’t been in Fettered’s dungeon in years. I know how to use every single piece of equipment in there and use it well, but I walked away because I needed something different.”
She’s touching my collarbone now. “What do you need?”
“Connection. Intimacy without a lot of toys and fancy skills getting in the way.” I smile and kiss her ear. “You’ll have to take my word that last night’s setup wasn’t actually very complicated.” Just enough to open a really beautiful door.
She traces a finger through my chest hairs. “Don’t you want to be the one who lets go sometimes?”
Smart, even when she’s distracted. “Do you want to be the one in total control? Tying me up?”
She looks at me, eyes wide. “No.” And then she pauses, hearing her own words. “No, I don’t. Not at all.”
There we go. “We’re different in what we want, and fortunately for us, our different needs fit together very nicely.”
She looks at me consideringly. “What about the shared kind of sex, where we both give and take? I want to touch you sometimes. To give to you.” She blushes. “Or to come visit you in the shower.”
I laugh and kiss her rosy cheeks. “You can jump me anytime you like, sweetheart.” They might revoke my Dom membership card for that, but I’ve learned some things in twenty-five years. “You wanted a taste of kink, but that doesn’t mean we have to live there all the time. Lots of people in the lifestyle don’t. Vanilla sex can be a nice contrast, a way to meet a different set of needs.”
She tips her head down. “Does this mean we’re going to keep having sex?”
“Hell, yes.” I cup her breast and give her nipple a nice, strong roll, and grin when she gasps. “In just a few minutes, in fact. But first I have some homework for you.” My brain is in fine working order this morning, and it heard something important and ran with it.
She eyes me skeptically.
I laugh. “Good homework. I’d like to play more with you, explore more of the kink side of sex and find out what you enjoy. Usually that involves a contract and a checklist, but that doesn’t feel like the best way to do this.” I want her saying yes to things, not fretting about how often she’s saying no.
Her skepticism isn’t dimming a whole lot. “Okay.”
She’s learning fast, but I actually plan to be nice to her this time. I think. “It sounds like you have good friends you can talk to about this. I’d like you to get together with some of them and have them help you with a list of ideas you’d like to try. Make up a menu that I get to choose from.”
She looks embarrassed, but intrigued.
“There are two ground rules.”
That puts skeptical right back in her eyes.
I want to laugh, but she needs to know just how serious I am about this next part. “The first one is that people in this lifestyle talk a lot and it can be very blunt. I don’t have a problem with you sharing anything that’s happened between us. Your friends will know to treat that information with respect.”
She lifts a wry eyebrow. “They’ll tease me forever.”
I grin. “That’s a form of respect.”
She snorts. “What’s your second rule?”
I lick her ear. “You bring me the whole menu. Leave off anything that you truly don’t want to do. But leave on the things that make you squirm.” Her friends will take care of her soft heart, but if she invites who I think she will, they’ll also make sure she ventures into territory that’s at least a little uncomfortable.
She wiggles away from my questing tongue, giggling. “Fine, I will. Stop licking me.”
Not a chance. I reach for the side table and the condom I stashed there.
She watches, eyes big, as I roll it on.
I lift her up and straddle her over my legs, my cock at her entrance. “Time to finish what we started before breakfast. Have a seat on my cock and then we’ll explore what happens when I suck on your nipples.”
She drops down on me like her legs have stopped functioning.
I remind myself she needs to be able to walk today.
And then I grin and lift her breast to my mouth.
Chapter Twenty-Eight
Gabby
I can’t believe I’m doing this.
I look around my living room at the four very curious faces who have been happy to give up their Saturday afternoon on no notice. “Does anyone need more tea? Cookies?”
Ari grins at me. “You just poured us tea. Now sit down and tell us about this mysterious homework you have.”
Leo’s partner, Sam, sitting right beside her on the couch, holds up his toes and wiggles them. “I do really nice pedicures, if that’s helpful.”
Scorpio plops her feet in his lap. “Sold. Black polish with skulls, please.”
Doxy is quieter, sitting on her own in one of my armchairs. I take a seat in the other one and give her a wry look. “Kids these days.”
The three on the couch all make razzing noises.
I do this fast, before I can lose my nerve. “I’ve been seeing this man Daniel. He used to be a regular at Fettered, and he’s been introducing me to a little bit of less-vanilla sex, and he gave me some homework. He wants me to have my friends help me make a menu. Of ideas.” I’m shriveling into tiny grandmother raisins inside, but I need to get this out. “Of some things he gets to pick from for us to try together.”
Ari’s grinning like a fiend. Sam looks over at her. “Is this the Daniel I think it is?”
She nods. “Yup.”
Sam’s eyes get big, and then he grins at me. “Go, Gabby.”
I’m confused, even though I know Sam and Leo have been members of the club for a long time. And suddenly worried.