Wasabi has additional long-term Boy’s-Own benefits. It is a member of the cruciferous family of vegetables that includes cabbage, broccoli, radish, horseradish and Brussels sprouts. All of these vegetables share a substance called indole-3-carbinol, which has a significant anti-oestrogenic effect. Specifically, it diminishes the amount of female hormones swilling around middle-aged men, boosting testosterone and bolstering libido. Load up on these veggies three times a week and the mature man can re-release the amorous hits of youth. Embarrassing for offspring, but great for mums and dads.
Horseradish is a close relative of wasabi and shares its aphrodisiac power. Much of the wasabi used in the West is in fact a mix of powdered horseradish, mustard and green food colouring. Although horseradish has similar heat it is no substitute for the authentic taste of real wasabi. When buying wasabi in a shop always check the label to make sure you are getting the genuine article. Fresh wasabi is uncommon outside Japan, so you will usually find it in powder or paste form. There is no advantage to either as the paste is just rehydrated powder. The classical sushi combination of wasabi and light soy sauce can be stretched to create a vibrant dressing for a salad of seared salmon with watercress and avocado. It combines well with honey to create a delicious punchy glaze for roast salmon or even gammon. My heart, however, is forever smitten with the fusion dish of wasabi-tinged tuna tartare. This can be served on cucumber slices as hors d’oeuvres or as a full-blown starter with a pile of chilled soba noodles. Don’t scrimp on the quality of your raw tuna as this is essential to the success of the final dish.
Tuna Tartare with Soba Noodle Salad
Spring onion : 2
Raw tuna : 150 g (the very best quality)
Avocado : 1
Ginger root : ½ tsp (very finely grated)
Light soy sauce : 2 tbsp
Sesame oil : 1 tbsp
Wasabi paste : 1 tsp
Sushi vinegar : 1 tbsp
Furikake seasoning : 1 tsp
Finely slice the white part of the spring onions and finely chop the tuna and avocado. Mix with the all the remaining ingredients and set aside for the flavours to infuse. If you can’t find furikake seasoning (which is a mix of black and toasted white sesame seeds with nori seaweed and red shiso leaf) just use toasted sesame seeds.
SOBA SALAD
Dry soba noodles : 100 g
Rocket : a good handful
Spring onion : 1
Carrot : 1
Cucumber : ¼
Radishes : 4
Light soy sauce : 3 tbsp
Mirin : 3 tbsp
Tabasco : ½ tsp
Cook the soba noodles as instructed until al dente, plunge into cold water and rinse twice to wash out all the remaining starch. Squeeze dry and place in a bowl. Finely slice the rocket and the spring onion. Slice the carrot and cucumber and radishes into fine strips and toss with the soba noodles. Mix the soy sauce with the mirin and Tabasco, then stir through the salad. To serve, place the noodle salad in two shallow bowls. Use an oiled chef’s ring to clear a space in the middle of each salad and fill with tuna tartare. Remove the ring to reveal neat cylinders of tuna tartare. Serve with a crisp Alsace Riesling or warm sake.
Wasabi and Ginger Salad Dressing
Ginger : 2 tsp
Wasabi paste : 2 tsp
Light soy sauce : 3 tbsp
Honey : 2 tsp
Rice vinegar : 1 tbsp
Toasted sesame oil : 1 tbsp
Grate the ginger to form a paste, then whisk together with all the other ingredients. If you want a fibre-free dressing, allow the flavours to infuse for at least an hour, then sieve out the ginger. Serve with seared salmon or seared beef in a peppery salad.
Nuts, Seeds and Grain
ALMONDS
Almonds have long been regarded as both a symbol of love and a potent aphrodisiac, inciting men and exciting women in equal measure. Hirsute strongman Samson wooed dishy, deceitful Delilah with bouquets of flowering almond branches – not such a fine idea as it turned out. Swashbuckling French scribbler Alexandre Dumas swore by their fortifying properties, diligently putting away a bowl of almond soup before taking his squeeze, Mademoiselle Mars, to the moon and back.
Greek mythology tells of Phyllis, a beautiful Thracian princess. She met and fell in love with the warring Athenian prince Demophon, as he travelled home from Troy. They were to be married, when news of his father’s death called Demophon back to Athens on the eve of their wedding. Demophon swore to return by the next full moon and fulfil his promise to marry Phyllis. Months passed without word. Distraught and bereft of hope, Phyllis hanged herself, whereupon the gods, moved by her sadness, turned her into the first almond tree. A disastrously delayed Demophon returned to find his beloved now a leafless, flowerless tree. Desperate with sorrow he embraced the tree, which spontaneously, and romantically, burst into flower. The ancient Greeks took this as a tale of great love and the almond tree has been prized as a symbol of romance in Greece ever since.
In the Middle East the almond is both widely cultivated and particularly revered. Commended by Arab sexologist Sheikh al-Nafzawi in his famed instructional tome The Perfumed Garden, they are duly dished out to perk things up at nuptials across Arabia. The Saudi government, impressed by the almond’s claim to fame, has conducted the only systematic study into their use as an aphrodisiac. Researchers at King Saud University put mice on an almond-rich diet, and observed with wonder as their rodent sperm became impressively hyperactive. Backing up the mouse research is some heavyweight nutritional support, showing almonds to be a rich source of vitamin E. Vitamin E is essential to healthy sexual function. When deprived of this essential nutrient males experience serious nut shrinkage, whilst females are rendered infertile; fortunately both predicaments are easily alleviated by a healthy helping of vitamin E-rich almonds.
When it comes to preparing almonds, there is a wealth of ways to sneak them into one’s nosh. As a key ingredient in baking, ground almonds feature widely in patisserie, perhaps most notably in the Italian amaretti cookies. In north India ground almonds are used extensively to thicken curries, such as the ubiquitous Korma. Whilst these are admirable uses for this estimable nut, I think it comes into its own at the very start and very end of a meal; smoked or devilled almonds make a sublime cocktail snack and in the form of marzipan-stuffed apricots and raspberry macaroons they make exquisitely perfect petits fours.
Devilled Almonds
Cayenne pepper : a pinch
Smoked paprika : a pinch
Black pepper : a pinch
Cumin : a pinch
Sea salt : 3 pinches
Honey : 1 tsp
Sunflower oil : 1 tsp
Blanched almonds : 200 g
Make a smooth paste with the cayenne, paprika, black pepper, ground cumin, sea salt, honey and a little sunflower oil.
Coat the blanched almonds in the spice paste and leave to absorb the flavours for a couple of hours.
Dry-fry the almonds in a hot non-stick pan for 5–10 minutes, agitating and stirring to make sure they do not burn.
Remove from the heat and leave to cool.
Marzipan-Stuffed Apricots
Blanched almonds : 100 g
Icing sugar : 100 g (and extra for dusting)
Amaretto liqueur : 1 tsp
Fresh apricots : 6
Flaked almonds : 1 tsp
In a food processor, finely grind the blanched almonds, then add the icing sugar and a teaspoon of amaretto liqueur. Continue to blend until the ingredients form a smooth paste – this is the marzipan.
Cut each apricot in half around the middle of the fruit. Remove the stone and the fill the pit of each half with the fresh marzipan.
Sprinkle the stuffed apricots with some toasted flaked almonds and dust with a little icing sugar.
Raspberry Macaroons
(makes about 10 macaroons)
Ground almonds : 150 g
Caster sugar : 150 g
Crème de framboise : ½ tsp
Egg whites : 2 medium-sized eggs
Whipping cream : 100 ml
Raspberries : 150 g
Icing sugar : for dusting
Preheat the oven to 200°C, and line a baking tray with non-stick baking parchment.
Place the ground almonds and sugar in a food processor, blitz to combine and whilst still running, gradually add the crème de framboise and the egg whites, adding only enough so that the mixture just holds together. Be careful not to overwork the almonds as their oil will begin to be released.
Shape the mixture into walnut-sized balls, place on the baking tray and flatten slightly.
Bake in the top of the preheated oven for 15 to 18 minutes. Once cooked, transfer the macaroons to a cooling rack.
To serve the macaroons, slice them in half across the width and fill with stiff whipped cream and a couple of fresh raspberries. To finish, dust with a little icing sugar.
CHOCOLATE
Chocolate is another much-hyped heavyweight of the aphrodisiac world. Its early history lies in the steamy forests of Central America. The Mayan and Olmec civilisations got their meso-American rocks off quaffing a frothy bitter drink called xocolatl. This early drinking chocolate was made from the roasted and then fermented beans of the god-food or cacao tree with added chilli. The special properties of the cacao bean were enjoyed across Central America. In Mayan wedding ceremonies the happy couple would toss back a glassful to liven up the night ahead. Aztec potentate Montezuma is said to have put away fifty glasses a day to steel himself for sultry nights with his extensive harem. He prized cacao above silver and gold, demanding it as tribute from his vassal states. Marauding Spanish conquistadors were most perplexed when, on breaking into the Aztec treasure chamber, they found not gold but cacao beans. The beans were sent back to Spain with the rest of the booty and so began the Western world’s love affair with chocolate.
The Spanish sweetened the drink with sugar and quickly agreed that chocolate was much easier to pronounce than xocolatl. Chocolate fever swept across Spain like the clap and within a few years was inspiring expensive nights of naughtiness across the whole of Europe. Venetian passion plunderer Casanova declared it the ‘elixir of love’ whilst French ladies of ill repute perked up their drunken clients with restorative pots of chocolatey goodness. Bizarrely, it is the fun-phobic Quakers of un-merry England we have to thank for the world’s first chocolate bar. In 1847 Fry & Sons of Bristol used the Van Houten method to split the ground chocolate bean paste into solids and butter. They then recombined them with sugar, and chocolate as we know it was born.
Today chocolate’s saucy reputation is as entrenched as ever. Ladies seem particularly partial. My occasional furtive forays into the forbidden handbag have proven chocolate to be as essential to female happiness as lipstick, painkillers and strange cotton-wool objects which remain a mystery. Like most of the male world, every Valentine’s Day I trot off to my favourite chocolatier and procure a box to woo my special lady.
A well-made truffle melting on the tongue is a deeply sensual experience not to be sniffed at. A nose around chocolate’s nutritional properties reveals some rather inspirational findings. A team of British scientists recently discovered that chocolate raises pulses more effectively than a passionate kiss. Cocoa solids in chocolate contain three aphrodisiac suspects: theobromine, PEA (phenylethylamine) and tryptophan. Theobromine raises the heart rate and dilates the blood vessels in exactly the same way as sexual arousal. PEA occurs naturally in the brain in trace quanties that surge during orgasm and during the first flush of love. It is a bit opaque whether the PEA in chocolate can make the long trip from tummy to brain before metabolising. Dissolving chocolate on the tongue or snorting cocoa powder are probably the best ways to bring this love drug to the brain. Tryptophan breaks down into serotonin which, when it surges in the brain as it does during sex, creates a blissed-out sense of well-being.
With this much smoke there simply has to be some sort of sexual incendiary smouldering away in a bar of dark chocolate. Add the nutrition to the evidence in millions of female handbags and you have a mighty persuasive case.
The Aztecs and Mayans spiced their drinking chocolate with chilli and vanilla, two other equally aphrodisiac ingredients. Chocolate has a curious chemical romance with chilli, allowing you to take far more chilli than expected. Surprisingly delicious and as far from cocoa-at-bedtime as could be, this is pure sexual chocolate. Alternatively, dodge the Valentine’s Day chocolate tax by preparing some sumptuous Chambéry chocolate truffles, guaranteed to melt your loved one’s heart with extra points for effort.
Aphrodisiac Hot Chocolate
Whole milk : 600 ml
Vanilla pod : 1
Nutmeg : ¼
Red chilli : ½ mild chilli
Dark chocolate (minimum 70% cocoa solids) : 100 g
Sugar : to taste
Pour the milk into a pan.
Split the vanilla pod, scrape out the seeds and add to the milk.
Grate the nutmeg into the milk and add the finely chopped chilli.
Heat gently, whisking the ingredients together so all the flavours infuse into the milk.
Shave the dark chocolate into wafer-thin slices using a vegetable peeler.
Stir the chocolate into the hot milk and allow to melt. Do not boil.
Strain out any solids and pour the hot chocolate into glasses. Serve immediately. Add sugar to taste.
Chambéry Truffles
(makes 20 truffles)
Vegetable oil : 1 tsp
Caster sugar : 100 g
Flaked almonds : 50 g
Lemon juice : a squeeze
Dark chocolate : 350 g
Double cream : 120 ml
Brush a metal baking tray with the vegetable oil.
In a heavy saucepan melt the caster sugar and heat until it reaches 130°C. Add the flaked almonds and squeeze of lemon juice and pour on to the greased baking tray.
Allow the praline to cool then break into pieces and grind to a powder in a food processor.
Chop the chocolate into small pieces. Add one third to a bowl, heat the cream to boiling point and add to the chocolate.
Let the cream and chocolate stand for a minute, then whisk vigorously together. Add three quarters of the praline powder and mix again.
Pour the truffle filling into a tray and chill in the fridge for an hour.
Using a teaspoon, scoop out the filling and shape by hand into 20 balls.
Place the truffles in the freezer for a further 2 hours to set.
Remove the truffles from the freezer and allow to warm for 10 minutes.
Gently heat the remaining chocolate in a bowl set over simmering water.
Dip the truffles in the melted chocolate one by one, coating them completely.
Carefully remove each truffle from the chocolate with a fork, sprinkle with the remaining praline powder, and place on non-stick baking parchment to set.
OATS
On a chilly Scots morning, nothing prepares for a Highland fling like a steaming bowl of porridge. The oat groat is the most humble and hearty of aphrodisiacs. Unlikely to wow with exoticism or expense, oats thrive in cool damp climes and cost next to nothing. It is rugged manly mystique and nutritional nosebag that puts horse-feed on the bon viveur’s aphrodisiac high table.
Oats have long been associated with virility. Since the Republic of Rome, the reckless rutting of young bucks has been fondly described as the sowing of wild oats. I have always taken the phrase to imply that a man has a certain amount of flighty seed that needs to be pumped out before he gets to the good dependable family-forming stuff. The sensible chap rattles through this froth in emotionally undemanding relationships with innkeeper’s daughters, showgirls and the occasional bored housewife. Once the good stuff begins to flow, the sage stud moves on to marriage material. Not the most modern of views perhaps, but science is in full support of oats’ manly association.
The extract from green oat straw has been shown to free
up testosterone in both men and women, fuelling the desire for a roll in the hay. Once rolling, this extract is said to fight floppiness, and stops any half-cocked explosions from the old trouser cannon. Oats are pretty nutritious but the source of this goodness is rather more particular. Oats have a unique set of phytoalexins which act as a natural defence to deter rampant ruminants. These chemicals are known as avenanthramides and are present as much in oats as in green oat straw.
The Food and Drink Administration of America acknowledges that oatmeal is an effective anti-itching remedy. Rub it on a nettle sting and you will see the soothing avenanthramides in action. When eaten, oats act as a mild anti-histamine. As we saw with cheese, histamines speed lovers towards the delirium of orgasm. A mild dose of anti-histamines should keep this speeding within acceptable limits, steadying overexcitable libidos. Wise men say the journey is as important as the destination, and I say it is terribly rude to arrive at a party too early.
The same avenanthramides are responsible for oats’ anti-impotence claims. A study at Tufts University in Boston has shown a direct correlation between avenanthramide levels and privates sector production of nitric oxide. Nitric oxide is absolutely fundamental to sex, providing the righteous rigidity of resplendent arousal. Released from artery walls on stimulation, nitric oxide causes blood vessels to dilate. The floodgates open and blood rushes in. The exit points, however, remain unaffected. The blood backs up, the pressure builds, and organs swell rudely with up to ten times as much blood as normal. Invest in a bowlful of porridge and hydraulic perfection is yours.
The Aphrodisiac Encyclopaedia Page 15