by Abra Ebner
“So,” his brow was furled as it had been all day, “You want to go get dinner or something?” He had a look on his face that suggested he wasn’t even sure if he was really hungry.
I gave him a sour look. I desperately wanted to rush back to my room to examine the raven feather more closely, so I quickly thought of an excuse. “No…” I pushed my hands in my pockets, “I’m still tired from all this, I may just go lay down.”
Scotts gaze was locked on the ground, “Oh…” I could tell his mind was still perplexed, “Yeah that’s totally cool.” We stopped on the path and he looked at me, “Well, guess I’ll catch you tomorrow?” He smiled but it was bleak and I feared I may have lost him.
“Yep.” I faked another grin, feeling I’d ruined him enough today. “Just come get me in the morning.” This friendship stuff was getting easier by the second. I never knew manipulating someone could be so simple.
He turned toward the cafeteria like a stunned puppy.
“Bye,” I waved, but I figured it wasn’t doing any good so I sighed and turned toward the cabin, picking up my pace in sudden excitement.
THE MEADOW
I rushed in the door, slamming it hard behind me as the wind I’d made caused the feather to flutter on the bed stand. I looked at it with hungry eyes as I raced across the room, discarding my bag on the floor like dirty laundry. Sitting on the edge of the mattress, I reached down to flick on the lamp as the spray of light caused the feather to glimmer like brilliant steel. With caution, I reached toward the quill, allowing its glowing luminosity to catch my eye.
As I spun the feather under the lamp, its dimensional blackness amazed me. Never before had I seen something so radiant, so mysterious.
“Ouch,” I yelped, looking at my finger in alarm as the quill cut through my skin. I examined the bloodied end, seeing that it was sharp as a razor. With greater caution, I held it like a pen and scraped it along the wood table as a sliver of maple curled up toward me. It was not only sharp, but extremely strong and I gasped in disbelief. This was no ordinary feather, it was armor.
I blinked as I stared at it some more, brushing the fronds through my fingers, careful to avoid the tip. As I tried to flatten the black barbs into the center, like a thin wisp, they instantly sprayed back out into a perfect fan. I held it close to my face and narrowed my gaze, examining the weave and finding it completely unaltered as though it had never even been touched. No matter how much pressure I applied, I couldn’t destroy it or unravel its secrets.
I lay back on my bed, questioning if the quill really could have come from the raven in my dream, the menacing, large and powerful bird I’d imagined. A wave of anxiety rose over me and I placed the feather back to rest as I shut my eyes in denial. I felt restless, my mind racing faster than it ever had.
Leaping from my bed, I eagerly grabbed a coat from my bag that still sat unpacked on the floor. Pressing my arms through the sleeves with haste, I walked back outside. It was late afternoon and I longed for some sort of release and exercise. Looking around I noticed there was a path that advanced further up the hill and into the woods. I took off at a brisk pace past my cabin, taking every step with an anxious purpose I had never known.
As I entered the woods, I came a cross a small manmade hut with a bench where I decided to take a moment to rest after the steep uphill hike. As I sat there, I looked around, taking in every site and sound, unable to hide from the fact that I felt like something was watching me. I shook my head, again blaming my medication.
The general dampness of the woods felt cool and nice as the sun streamed through the branches in misty bands, landing radiantly on the fern covered forest floor. Where the sun hit the ferns, the forest came alive with vivid greens and yellows, something I had rarely seen back home. After a moment of rest under the canopy of the branch-covered hut, I took off again on the trail through the woods.
My gaze was fixed toward the sky and the massive canopy above me as I treaded past droves of berries and moss, my feet sinking into the saturated ground. The stillness of the woods made the voices in my head pound against my temples. I closed my eyes as I beckoned for them to shut up, pleading for them to give me peace. I tried to concentrate on my pace as the malleable turf beneath my feet gave even further, mucking up my boots and making it hard to find a good footing as I struggled along for what seemed an hour.
Ahead, the trees began to thin and my heart leapt at the thought of a new surrounding. I squinted toward the light, and as I approached, the forest opened up on a large pristine meadow. I gingerly stepped into the opening as the sun poured down on me, warming my cool face. Pulling my hands from my coat, I held them out to my sides, allowing my fingers to lace through the tall grass as it leaned toward me. In my wake, the grasses bloomed from my touch, leaving a trail of small white flowers and a burst of fragrance that tickled my nose.
Placing one foot before the other I made my way to the center of the field where I found a spot of grasses that seemed suitable to rest in. Easing my tired body to the ground, the earth cradled me like a bed, the roots gradually growing into a sort of frame beneath my weight. Looking toward the blue sky, powdered with misty puffs of clouds, I shut my eyes and worked to stifle every voice one at a time until there was nothing but the sounds of nature. A warm wind blew over me and I could feel the way my peculiar abilities had delightfully aggravated the plants in my radius.
I opened my eyes one at a time, seeing that a perfect circle of blooming wildflowers now surrounded the spot where I laid. The sun became hot and I shrugged off my jacket, allowing its bright light to kiss my face and hopefully reach into my dark soul. Bugs began to flock toward the fragrant scent of the flowers and a few landed on my pale skin. Before I knew it, no less than five ladybugs were crawling on me, their red wings deepening in color as they drew in my cocktail of life and energy.
In the far distance, I heard the song of a bird as the voices in my head completely faded away. A strange calm fell over me and all I could feel was my shallow breathing and the wind blowing through the grasses. I concentrated on the subtle sounds, finding them somehow familiar despite the fact that in my memory, this peace had never existed for me. My hands were sprawled to each side of my body and my fingers were spread as the grasses intertwined them like rings.
As I rested there, the sounds of the forest ceased to further nothingness as though a bell jar had been dropped around me, the stillness becoming numb. For a moment I didn’t move as my breathing began to quicken and the tight feeling in my chest returned. I twisted my eyes and looked around me, feeling as though I was now under water and like a sudden fear, something made me sit up straight as an arrow.
The sound of my breath dragged like echoes in my head and I looked around defensively and my eyes instantly shot to a black object now perched straight in front of me. There, at the edge of the flowers sat a large black raven. Terror struck my heart with a heavy vengeance as I stared motionless, contemplating my next move. Grasping my chest in pain, I locked onto its gaze like a magnet.
The ravens stare refused to falter as he seemed to be asking me questions, ripping at my head as he searched my thoughts for answers. The raven’s eyes and feathers were not like the one in my dream, they were dull and flat, like you would expect from a regular raven. Something about the bird seemed far more sinister as it stood there very still, head turned to the side with his mouth open, breathing through its beak.
Anxiety filled my limbs as I tried hard to push through the fog in my head. Without warning the raven made an abrupt hop closer to my shielding flowers and let out a shrill “caw!” as though angry I had tried to disrupt his invasion into my head. I jumped, feeling the adrenaline pulsing painfully through my clenched chest. From behind me came another piercing “caw!” and I snapped my neck around as the raven before me released his stare to look to the sky. The terror in me grew stronger as another raven dove down at me, talons bared and eyes blazing a deep blue-grey, just like the raven of my nightmare.
&nbs
p; As fast as my limbs could manage, I summoned them to move, staggering to a standing position as I began to run. The large raven flew down over my head and I ducked, feeling the wind from its wings as it fluttered through my hair before diving with violence down onto the other raven. I fell onto my side in shock, falling on my arm and feeling my skin rip as the grasses stained my jeans.
As I struggled to get back up, my eyes shot to where the two ravens were now fighting, horrifying screams coming from both. The raven that had seemed to save me glittered like a black pearl in the sun and I gasped as I saw the fury in his glowing eyes. As the glowing raven scratched in fierce blows at the matte raven, my chest began to seize with so much pain I could barely remain conscious and I averted my stare as the agony buckled me onto the ground where I struggled to catch my breath, choked in my attempt to get away.
My eyes squeezed shut as everything around me began to die and the whole field turned to fog and darkness. I crawled on the ground, clenching my chest as my limbs went rigid and I could no longer see through the thick mist of my mind. In the far distance, the sharp screams of the ravens ceased as though another bell jar had been dropped over me and for a moment the silence of the field returned.
I breathed hard as I struggled to see what was happening but it was as though someone had covered me in a shroud of black. I heard footsteps approach as I lie paralyzed on the ground where strong arms ripped me from the earth, positioning me in their cradling grasp. There was nothing I could do to get away, so I let my body receive its fate as I gave in. Something in my chest tried to surface beneath the clenching pain but I couldn’t discern the feeling. I struggled to look at who had grabbed me, but all I could see were the dark clouds crossing behind my eyes. I groaned, feeling that we were now running away from the scene, the sound of breaking branches and moving ferns brushing past us.
I then heard the familiar crunching of the gravel path, sooner than I’d expected as I had been falling in and out of consciousness, and I recognized that we were back at the college. The footsteps were slower now, calmer than they had been. The clouds of my mind began to dissipate as I heard a door opening and felt my body being placed on a soft bed. As the grasp on me was released, I heard a curious scratching as a gentle wind blew over my face and I struggled harder then ever to see what I’d heard. Forcing my eyes to work, I caught nothing more than a dark flashing silhouette of something I couldn’t recognize as a familiar voice screeched from another room.
“Oh Miss!” I saw the blur of the nurse running toward me, “What happened?”
I moaned in pain as I felt the burning in my arm increase as a warm thick liquid dripped from it like honey. My movement began to return as my mind was again able to work through the strange dark fog and comprehend what was now happening.
“Miss, who brought you here?” I could feel the nurse gently grasp my arm.
I attempted to get up but her firm touch forced me back down on the bed. Memories screamed through my head as I worked to put the events together before my mind sucked them away from me. The ravens, I thought, and those eyes. There was no reply to give her, no hint of who saved me so I gave no reply.
“Just rest then,” she said, realizing I was in no condition to answer her. She put a cold towel to my head as she began to hum.
I felt exhausted, and as my eyesight came back I noticed it was dark outside. I struggled to put the events together, the matte raven and the glittering raven. Why had the other raven tried to read my thoughts? It had tried to take something from me, something I hadn’t even known I had. I felt my chest for answers, looking for the dark rooms I had locked away like a secret inside my soul.
I winced as the nurse poked me with a needle and the stinging subsided to a numbing relief. I listened as she continued to hum, the song lulling my mind and encouraging my body to relax. I heard the plinking and gentle tug of my skin as she stitched a large gash close to my elbow.
“There you are now.” I heard her snip the string.
I turned my head, opening my eyes to look at her. She had a plump smile on her face as she noticed me. The single light in the room was magnified on my blood stained arm as she pressed a warm rag to the wound. She reached for some gauze and wrapped in tights rows around my arm, the pressure relieving some of the deep aching pain.
She patted me on the shoulder as she pulled a blanket over me. “Sleep,” she whispered in my ear.
I closed my eyes as she flicked off the lamp and I heard her walk like a silent cat out of the room, closing the door in her wake.
As I lay there falling asleep, I thought of my mother. She had lied to me by telling me I was safe, lied that I’d find my soul and my happiness. There was something she had known, something I longed to remember about her. I clenched my eyes shut as the same depressing numbness filled my heart and I tried harder than ever to cry.
SPY
I woke to the sharp feeling of pain as I opened my eyes, seeing the nurse re-wrapping my arm. She was humming again, but this time the stinging was too great for it to calm me.
“Well now,” she saw that I was alert, “are you able to remember how this happened?”
I glanced at my exposed stitches, my arm bruised a deep purple that stood stark against the rest of my milky skin. The gash was about six inches long, and from the look of it, very deep.
I worked to make the words, “My…” I paused, clearing my throat. “I fell.”
She blinked at me in a way that suggested she didn’t quite believe me, but would.
“I fell out in the woods while I was hiking.” I tried my best to lie, my voice full of persuasion.
She smiled at me, “We all do it seems.” She let out a small sigh as she looked at me with pity, her beady eyes unassuming.
Her accent and overall weight hadn’t made her seem like the woodsy outdoorsy type. She tightened a new bandage around my arm as a shadow cast over the room. I looked to the door as Scott entered, a dorky smile plastered on his face. My heart sank as a strange part of me hoped to see the professor.
“I guess I’ve really got to keep my eyes on you,” he joked, his hands clasped at his waist.
The nurse watched his nervous and caring reaction toward me and she smirked in delight to herself.
I gave him a blank stare, angry that she’d assume he was my boyfriend, “Yeah, I guess so.”
“You up for going to class?” he asked with an eager pop.
I was quick to sit up, a strange surge of excitement filling my limbs at the thought of seeing the professor again. “Yeah,” I looked to the nurse for permission, “I feel alright.”
She gave me a grave stare, “Are you sure miss?” She then looked to Scott as another smirk crossed her face.
Rolling my eyes, I nodded as my arm stung under my weight. She helped me up as I worked hard to stifle a wince. Scott handed me my bag and I grabbed it with my good arm, lacing it onto my elbow.
“There’s a muffin in there for you too, since you missed breakfast.” The sheepish look on his face made me want to vomit, that, and I was really sick of muffins.
I gave him an awkward glance, “Oh.” I walked toward the door on weak legs, “Thanks.” I took a deep breath as we exited, willing my body to work like normal.
We took our time getting to the hatchery where I noticed we were very late. As we entered, everyone stared at my arm with horrified looks of curiosity. The last thing I needed was more attention and more reasons for them to start rumors. The professor stood silently as we walked to the back of class and stood.
“Glad you could make it,” she gave me a warm and inviting smile and I figured she must have heard I’d been injured.
She continued to preach as Scott turned to me, “So what did you do this time?” His voice was full of humor.
I kept my eyes to the front, hiding the lies, “I fell while I was taking a short hike.”
He let out a quiet snort, “So then who brought you in?” His gaze became doubtful.
I stood still, bre
athing for a moment, struggling to remember as I searched hard to recognize who it was. “I’m not really sure.” I crinkled my brow in irritation.
“Strange.” I could feel his stare searing through me and I realized he was starting to catch on.
I looked at him, a fake nonchalant smirk on my face, “I’m sure it was just another hiker.”
He nodded in compliance, accepting the explanation, “Yeah, you’re probably right. Too bad they didn’t stick around,” he shrugged.
“Yeah,” I thought about the obscure figure as it had left, I didn’t want to believe the raven had taken me down the hill. My mind hid the facts it was unwilling to acknowledge. Had the professor been there? And if so, why had he saved me if the evil in his eyes seemed to suggest otherwise. I was anxious to get to his class, motivated to find out the truth.
The professor pointed to the tank of fish eggs as we gathered around, two had hatched and were huddled into the rocks at the bottom while the other eggs still sat idle. Scott looked enthralled, his innocence easily amazed.
The professor motioned us to the tanks where I hung back, “So. Do you think Professor Edgar is hiding something?” I asked, curious to get Scott’s take as I leaned toward him.
“I’m not sure,” he hissed. There was a strange hostility now lacing his voice and I realized he was probably angry because he was thinking my obsession with the professor meant I liked him, but that was absurd.
I leaned back, finding he was in no mood for chitchat. Finally, the professor excused us and I grabbed Scott’s arm and dragged him outside before he could ask the professor a million stupid questions and make us late.
“Ouch! Gosh!” He looked at me confused, his face still a little angry.
“Oh just hurry,” I hissed back.