by Ann Marie
Antonia just stood there, looking at the figure still standing in the doorway. The light was very bright behind the figure, so one could not make out any distinguishing features. Juliet came running, pressing the sides of her dress down with her hands.
“Sorry sir, I did not hear you come in. How was your day?” Juliet’s eyes jumped between Antonia and the figure standing in the doorway.
Salvatore relinquished his anger as he invited the stranger into his home. “Well kid, what did I tell ya? Huh? Are they not the most beautiful closures ever seen? Tell me whatcha think.” Salvatore motioned with his hand towards his wife. “This here is Juliet. And the little woman there is Antonia.” Salvatore never considered his wife or daughter as individuals. To him they were property and he let outsiders know this as well. Antonia’s eye’s never left the stranger. He was dirty and carried an odor which summoned up bile. He walked into the house and towards Antonia, who involuntarily took a step or two backwards. Her father immediately picked up on this and quickly stepped up behind her. He jabbed at her back with something sharp and she froze in response.
“Are ya scared of me?” The stranger asked, while he tilted his head in every direction so as to get a better look at her. “Do I scare you?” Again the sharp object rammed her in the back.
“No sir, you don’t scare me.”
“Good, I wouldn’t want to scare you.” The stranger kept his stare on Antonia as he spoke to her father.
“Yes Sal, I think we can do some business here. Shall we begin?”
Antonia felt her lungs solidify as her body recognized the danger implied in the stranger’s statement. From behind, her father grabbed her around her thighs and lifted her off the ground. She could have been sitting on his shoulder.
“Juliet put two steaks on and whip up some taters, me and the kid gots business to do. I want dinner on the table in twenty minutes. Do you hear me woman?”
“Yes sir, right away.”
Salvatore and the kid walked back to the bedroom. Antonia watched from her father’s arms as her mother ran to the kitchen obediently. She watched her mother force herself not to watch as Antonia was taken away. She felt anger with her mother for the first time in her short life.
Once inside the bedroom, her father closed the door behind them. This made the danger feeling stronger, as Antonia never saw the door shut before. She felt totally cut off from her mother and she was very frightened. Her father placed her on her feet at the foot of the bed. He raised a single finger to her nose and gave a strong stare into her eyes, which told her not to move a muscle. “You see kid, it’s all in the training.”
“For three thousand, the training had better be more involved.”
“Oh, it is. You’ll see. Go ahead and ask her to do something, go on.” The kid looked questioningly at Salvatore, and then back to Antonia. He walked over to where she stood and stopped directly in front of her.
Again the smell overwhelmed her and she took a step backwards. But the bed behind her stopped her in her tracks. She almost fell back on it but managed somehow to stable herself. The stranger smiled at her as he said, “Take my pants off.” Antonia was not sure she heard him correctly, so she looked up questioningly. “Is there a problem? I said take my pants off.”
Antonia willed her hands to his belt buckle. It was rusty and pieces of the fake silver flaked off. The stranger’s belt was worn and cracked. It fell from the buckle easily. Antonia was finding it difficult to breathe with the stranger’s odor so close to her. She had to calm her fingers as she manipulated the button of the stranger’s pants. She could feel him harden through the material. She pulled the zipper down and caught a wicked smell as the strangers pants dropped to the floor.
Her hands dropped to her sides as she completed the task required of her. The stranger looked over to Salvatore, who closed his eyes as he nodded in agreement.
“Breathe on me.” Antonia stood about a foot away from the stranger. She breathed, not understanding. The stranger placed his right hand behind her head and brought it to his crotch. “Breathe on me.” The man was filthy. His jockeys were stained with a golden crust. There were black finger wipes all over the front of them. Antonia felt as if she might die right there on the spot. It would not be long before she wished she had.
When the stranger tired of the breathing game, he asked her to put her hand inside the slot. Antonia did as she was told. “Now grab hold of it and slowly pull it out.” Again, Antonia obeyed. “Lick it.” Antonia felt herself go pale. He could not be serious. It was oozing some sort of phlegm. It smelled and looked as if it hadn’t been washed in years. The stranger brought his face down to Antonia’s. “I said lick it, like this.” And slowly he ran his tongue up and down Antonia’s face.
Antonia heard her father chuckle as he sat watching in the corner of the room. Antonia tried to do what the stranger asked. It just wasn’t going to happen. It was as much as she could do to keep from throwing up.
Her father seemed to have noticed her color change, and not wanting to blow the deal, decided to step in before she ruined everything for him. “Hey, kid. Hang on a second. Come and sit over here for a moment.” With great difficulty, the stranger staggered over to where Salvatore was sitting. “There’s plenty of time for that. Why don’t you read over this closure contract and watch the little woman. Antonia, take your clothes off the way Daddy showed you. Go on.”
Antonia was grateful that the stranger had walked away. She was catching her breath when her father made the request. She took a deep breath to calm herself and started to undress, as she was taught to in front of a man. Slowly she undid her dress and pulled it up over her head teasingly.
“Oh, I’ve gotta have her Sal.”
“Well, just sign on the line and you can pick her up Friday evening.” Antonia placed her dress on the bed neatly and bent to untie her shoes.
A plate crashed on the kitchen floor. Both Antonia and Salvatore looked up at the door at the same time. Salvatore stood and started towards the door. He grabbed a finger full of Antonia’s hair as he passed and twisted it. “You do this right little woman. Just keep taking the clothes off like Daddy taught you.” With that he exited the room. Antonia watched him leave. She bent down to finish removing her shoes. She heard her father screaming at her mother. She heard her mother beg him to stop. Heard her mother apologize. She could mentally feel her mother cower into a corner. Again she felt angry with her mother.
She felt evil surround her and she was frightened again. It had just occurred to her that she was alone in the bedroom with the stranger. She knew her father would be a while. She knew her mother would have to earn forgiveness for whatever she had broken. She slowed down her undressing a bit, hoping her father would be back before this man did whatever it was she knew he was going to do to her. She started to remove her nylons. She was bent, almost folded in half. She rolled the nylon down the first leg. Removing the foot, she closed her eyes as she said a silent prayer. Slowly she rolled down the second leg and pulled her second foot from the nylon.
Before she could stand up straight, to neatly lay the nylons on the bed, he was behind her. He grabbed hold of her hips with both of his hands and jammed himself into her rectum. The pain was quick and searing. He held her still as he drove himself inside as far as he could manage. He stayed that way a moment as he asked her, “Are ya scared of me?” Antonia couldn’t breathe much less answer the man, so he tried again. Slowly he pulled himself out to the very edge, and then forcefully he jammed himself back inside of her. “I asked ya, are ya scared of me?”
“No sir...I am not scared of you.” Antonia answered in a breathless whisper, as that was all she could manage. Once again the stranger withdrew to the edge and forcefully jammed himself back inside of her. “Does it hurt?” She could not answer; her head was swimming from the pain. Again he repeated his steps. Again he asked her, “Does it hurt? Tell me, how does it feel.”
Antonia blinked her eyes hard trying to clear her head. Yes i
t hurt. It hurt more than anything she had ever experienced. But she had been learned in her short life that complaints only brought more of the same and she definitely did not want more so she was not about to answer honestly. “No, sir...” she whispered. “It...it feels real good sir.”
“Good, cause I wouldn’t want to hurt ya.” And with that he started to pump, and in less than a minute had emptied himself into her.
He held her in place until he had shrunken down and fallen out. He then released her, to fall on the floor. She managed to catch her weight with her hands. Her eyes were open, but she saw nothing. She sat back on her calves and folded her arms around herself. She was still wearing her tank top styled under shirt. It did nothing to ease the incredible coldness that surrounded her. She remained where she was dropped, as the stranger went about pulling up his pants. He made a quick stop in front of the mirror to check his appearance before walking over to the paper contract Salvatore had left for him to sign. He had just finished placing his mark upon the paper, when Sal opened the door to the room.
Salvatore only glanced at Antonia for a moment before smiling over to the stranger. “Come on kid, dinners ready.”
The stranger walked towards the doorway with the paper in hand and extended it out to Salvatore, who accepted it with a wide smile. “Find everything to your liking?” The stranger’s smile was his only response, as he made eye contact with Juliet. Salvatore never looked at Juliet as he told her, “Go clean up in there.” Tilting his head towards the bedroom.
While Salvatore and his guest ate their dinner, Juliet went to the bedroom to check on Antonia. Her heart ached as she saw the child sitting in a ball on the floor, half dressed. “Anthony, Anthony sweetie, are you OK?” Antonia never looked up. Juliet knelt down beside the child. “Antonia,” Her mother called as she lifted the child’s chin with her hand. “Antonia, are you alright?” There was no recognition in the girl’s eyes.
Juliet felt a slight bit of concern as she helped the lifeless child to her feet. “Let’s just get you cleaned up a bit, maybe then you can talk to me?” She asked hopefully, not expecting a response. The two went into the bathroom, where Juliet put Antonia in the tub and quickly bathed her. She then wrapped a towel around the child and carried her out to the bedroom. She sat Antonia on the bed and went about tidying up the room. She picked up the dress and the nylons and went back in the bathroom to place them into the hamper. When she returned Antonia was no longer on the bed. The towel that she had been wrapped in was lying on the floor.
Juliet bent down to pick up the towel and noticed a small discolored area on the carpet. She ran her fingers through it and knew that it was blood. She realized it must have been Antonia’s, since this was the same spot she had found her when she came into the room the first time. Holding the towel, Juliet pressed it down into the stain to soak up as much as possible. She had temporarily forgotten about Antonia. She became obsessed with removing the stain before Sal came back into the room.
Juliet was working feverishly on the floor and did not hear Salvatore enter behind her. He kicked at her hard in the ribs, knocking her to her side. “What the hell is this?” He questioned, motioning his arm to the bedroom window. Juliet had no idea as to what he was referring. While she was forcing herself to stand, withstanding the pain in her side, she noticed Antonia. The child was sitting, naked on the floor, in front of the window. She had her legs crossed Indian style and her hands were folded in front of her. She was staring out the window, as a breeze blew in and played upon her face.
Salvatore walked over to where she sat and placed himself between her and the window. If Antonia saw him, she made no indication. She just kept staring, as if through him, out the window. Salvatore glanced over at Juliet, who looked completely lost. He looked back at the child on the floor.
“You’re supposed to stand up when I enter the room, little woman. Have you temporarily forgotten, or do you need to be retrained?” Antonia made no move. Salvatore felt she was being defiant and his anger swelled. He grabbed the child’s throat and raised her to a standing position. Although she was now standing, she was still staring out the window, far away. Salvatore backhanded her. Like a punching dummy, she recovered without blinking and continued to stare through him. A droplet of blood left her lip and traveled down her chin. Salvatore felt concerned, and he did not know why. ‘Weakness.’, he told himself. He had let the child have too much freedom. He had become weak in her eyes. He removed his belt. “I will teach you to respect me woman!” He folded his belt in half and grabbed both ends with one hand. “Now turn around so as I can remind you of your manners.” Antonia never moved, she did however, finally make eye contact with Sal.
Juliet was standing frozen in her place. She witnessed the exchange between her husband and Antonia. She felt a strange sense of pride in her daughter’s behavior. She was not sure why, but she was no longer afraid for her. She watched as the belt came down across the child’s face and chest. Since she refused to turn, Sal was even more determined to teach her a lesson. But after the third crack with his belt, he stopped and just stared at the child. Antonia recovered from each crack with numbness. She never flinched or cried out. She never put up her hands to defend herself. Salvatore realized he had lost all control of the child and he felt a twinge of fear.
He tossed his belt on the bed and stomped out of the room. The front door slammed shut behind him as he escaped into the night. He sped off in his pick-up, as he raced for the town pub. He did not know what just happened back in his house, but he sure as hell wanted to get away from it.
Juliet took a cautious step towards her daughter. She wrung the towel in her hands without thinking. “Anthony, honey...” She stepped a little closer. “Mommy’s here sweetie. Honey?” Closer still she crept. She saw the red welts rise upon the child’s skin. Not at all as bad as she had expected though. Juliet took notice of a tiny drop of blood that had raced down Antonia’s leg towards her ankle. Another followed quickly behind the first, as Juliet quickened her steps to her daughter’s side.
Antonia continued to stare out the window. A new breeze had come in and touched her face. Gently she closed her eyes in acceptance. “Antonia, honey, open your eyes, please sweetie. It’s mommy, Anthony. I love you.” Juliet gave up trying and after wiping away the blood from the child’s face and leg, she went to get a night shirt for the child. She placed the shirt over Antonia’s head, and pulled both of the child’s arms through the sleeves. She carried the child to the bed and pulling back the covers laid her down gently. Antonia rolled over to her side and continued to stare out the window. Juliet felt a pang of loss. She pulled back Anthony’s hair, which had fallen in front of her face, apparently unnoticed. Tucking the hair behind the child’s ear, she bent to kiss her cheek. “I love you Anthony, mommy loves you very much.” The silence was thick in the small room.
“If you loved me, you’d make him stop.” Juliet’s head snapped back as if she had been smacked. She looked down at her daughter, who still looked out the window. Not at all sure if Anthony had actually spoken, or if it was an inner voice, Juliet stood up. Anthony never blinked. Never made any notice of her mother’s presence.
Juliet left the room, stopping for a moment in the doorway to gaze back at the child she lost just moments ago. She felt empty and alone as she walked back to the kitchen to clean up.
Salvatore was hurting. He felt his world breaking up in front of him and he did not know how to stop it. He drank until the bar closed and then bought a bottle to drink on his way home.
Juliet crawled into bed beside her daughter after cleaning up the house. The child was still staring out the window. Juliet thought she would be asleep by now. It had been over an hour since she put her to bed. Perhaps she was asleep, asleep with her eyes open. Juliet put her arm around her daughter and snuggled up close. Antonia was cold to the touch and never responded to her mother’s tenderness. Juliet checked to make sure the child was breathing. Satisfied that she was, Juliet closed her ey
es and tried to escape the day.
Salvatore pulled his car up to his house. He parked it a little too close to a tree. When he opened the door to get out, the door hit the tree. In a drunken fit of rage he opened and closed the door over and over again, smashing both the tree and truck door. The window of the door shattered as he threw the door open one last time and started to climb out. Cursing, he climbed the steps to his house. Opening the front door, he felt relief that his women were not standing there waiting for him obediently. He managed to find his way to his couch, where he crashed and passed out.
Antonia continued to stare out the window of the bedroom out into the darkness. The darkness came in through the window and scooped her up into its embrace. She floated out of the house, carried by the darkness. Falling, she felt herself falling. But this time she was not afraid. She felt strong and self assured.
Chapter 16
Harold was not comfortable with the information he had just devoured. There was nothing to imply the recent shooting had anything to do with Antonia’s past. Yet nothing of what he had read had suggested it had not. Harold tried to tell himself it was all just part of his over protectiveness for the child, that and a deep hollow boredom that begged to be dealt with.
He sat back in his chair and brought his hands together in pyramid position in front of his face. Maybe he was just getting old. Getting old? There’s a laugh, maybe he was old. What was it, what was the missing piece? He reached out for his coffee, but the cup was empty. He placed it down next to the phone, and let his hand slide from the cup to the phone’s receiver. Should he call Sharon back? Why though, what could she add?
He pulled his hand back again and he sat for a minute more just staring at the phone. Again his hand reached out for the receiver. He picked it up and listened for the dial tone before he dialed her number for the second time that morning.