“Why not?” He tried the knob. “Sara, please let me in. I won’t hurt you.”
That’s what they all say. “Go home, Nate. I’m okay, but I’m in no mood to talk to you right now.”
She’d have given a lot to have Jerden standing behind her, snarling. The mere thought of him gave her courage, but this time she wouldn’t need Jerden. Surely Nate would respect the fact that her door was locked—wouldn’t he?
She reminded herself that Nate didn’t know anything about her past and couldn’t have known how she would react when he kissed her. He was probably feeling bewildered and repentant.
Unfortunately, he didn’t sound that way. He sounded bitter and angry. “You don’t trust me, do you?”
“Nate, I don’t trust anyone who comes to my house this late at night. You should have called me.”
“You wouldn’t have answered when you saw who it was.”
He had a point. “Yeah, well, I’m not unlocking my door, either. Go home. We can talk some other time.”
“You let that alien bastard in your house.” His voice was sharp, accusing.
She chose to ignore the slur, even though it made her long to slap him. “I didn’t let him in. I carried him in. There’s a difference.”
“Yes, and then he carried you in.” Even in the dim light Sara could see the anger etched in his face. “That’s been bugging the hell out of me ever since. Did you and that damned man-whore kiss and make up?”
She considered telling him where she’d been that afternoon and with whom, but she had an idea it would provoke him even further—especially without Jerden there to back up her story. “It doesn’t matter what we did. What matters is that it’s none of your business. Look, I suppose I should be flattered that you’re interested in me in a romantic manner—at least, I think that’s what you’ve been trying to tell me—but I’m not interested. I’m not going to explain it any further. Please, just accept it and go home.”
He shook his head. “Not good enough, Sara. I won’t give up that easily.”
“Dammit, Nate, you scared the shit out of me! Nothing you can say or do will change that.” She sighed wearily. “Just go home. It’s been a very busy day, and I’m exhausted.”
To her surprise, he actually nodded. “Okay. I’ll leave, but we could be really good together, Sara. Promise me you’ll give it some thought.”
She’d give it some thought all right. All of the two seconds it would take to shout Oh, hell no! “Good night, Nate.”
“Good night, then.” As he turned and stepped off the porch, Sara caught sight of his clenched jaw and tight fists and wondered if he’d actually considered forcing his way in. The sick feeling in the pit of her stomach warned her that he very well might. Hurrying to the front door, she locked it, then waited until she heard the whine of his speeder before she went back to the couch. She picked up the computer, intending to continue her research, but thought it might be best to look into security systems instead. Then she realized that except at night, she wasn’t even in her house most of the time. A security system would be useless.
Still shaking, she sank down onto the couch wishing she knew what to do. Jerden hadn’t been wrong when he’d suggested that she’d come to Terra Minor to escape. She’d heard there were very few unmarried Terran men living there—most had immigrated with their wives. Of course, that was before the Zetithians arrived. Human men were still scarce, but human females were everywhere. Why couldn’t Nate have taken a fancy to one of them? Perhaps he would. She should suggest that Jerden invite all the unmarried Terran ladies in the region to his cookout. Maybe Nate would fall in love with one of them and leave Sara alone.
Jerden might find someone else, too. Then she wouldn’t have to pretend to be something she wasn’t just to keep Salan and the others from bothering him. The funny thing was, that thought didn’t make her feel any better at all. She felt hollow and empty, like all the joy had been sucked out of her soul.
It was a feeling she knew quite well. She had only just begun to feel happy again in the time she’d been on Terra Minor. Her exhausted brain didn’t know what to make of any of it.
“Guess it’s time I went to bed.” Then she remembered she hadn’t changed the sheets. “Doesn’t matter. If there are fleas, there are fleas. Not gonna worry about it now.”
But there weren’t any fleas. Only the lingering scent of the man who’d shared her bed for the past two nights, the man she’d spent a perplexing afternoon with and whose presence now haunted her dreams.
Jerden.
Chapter 11
As she might have expected, Sara received a call from Bonnie bright and early the next morning. “Considering your performance yesterday, I thought you might want to come over for a little woman-to-woman talk.”
Pulling the wool over Salan’s eyes had been relatively easy. Bonnie had obviously seen right through it. “What gave me away?”
“Several things,” Bonnie replied. “But I was particularly taken by your reaction to Hilbransk insinuating that you were in love with Jerden. You looked like you’d just swallowed an enock. Then there was the fact that Jerden actually bought you that dress.”
“I never wear dresses,” Sara said lamely.
“Believe me, I know. Want to talk about it?”
Sara blew out a breath. “Not really, but I guess I should. I’ll be there in about an hour.”
After saddling Akira, Sara mounted up and headed toward Bonnie’s farm, still trying to figure out how her simple life had suddenly become so complicated.
Then it got even more complicated. She arrived at Bonnie’s house only to find Danuban grazing in the yard and Cria sitting on the porch like a guardian sphinx.
Jerden was there ahead of her.
Her first thought was to turn tail for home, but Karsyn was already waving at her from the window. Moments later, the tiny blonde came flying out of the house. “Hi, Sara! Can I have a ride?”
“Sure, Karsyn.” Sara positioned Akira close to the porch and Karsyn climbed up in front of the saddle like a little monkey.
“Jerden’s here too! Did you see his big cat?”
“Um, yeah. She’s kinda hard to miss.”
Karsyn continued on, apparently immune to sarcasm. “I like her. Her name’s Cria. Did you know that?”
“Yes,” Sara said with a chuckle. “We’ve met.”
“Really? You’ve petted her and everything?”
“You bet.”
“She didn’t bite you, did she?” Not waiting for a reply, Karsyn bounced up and down. “Can this horse go faster?”
“Sure can, but he won’t unless I ask him to, so just sit still.”
Karsyn spun around, scowling. “I want to go fast.”
“And I want to talk to your mother.”
“Jerden’s talking to her now. Did you know he’s going to have a party? We get to eat hamburgers and swim in the lake!”
“Sounds wonderful.” She wondered if he’d mentioned the “hostess” thing, and also whether or not Bonnie had told him she’d figured out their little secret.
“Oh, it will be. Jerden was very sad for a while, but he’s happier now. I like him. Do you like him?”
Sara wasn’t sure how to answer that, but for the child’s benefit, she figured she shouldn’t complicate things too much. “Yes. I like him. We’re… friends.”
“Good. Now, make this horse go!”
Looping an arm around Karsyn’s waist, Sara put Akira into a slow, collected canter down the path that led to the main road. Karsyn let out a squeal that would’ve sent a lesser horse galloping for the hills, but Akira took it in stride. “Want to do something fancy?”
“Ooh, yes!”
A couple of flying lead changes had Karsyn squealing again. “It feels like he’s skipping!”
“Sort of. He goes sideways, too. Watch.
” Transitioning to the trot, Akira performed a half pass across the front yard to where Danuban was grazing.
“That’s really cool!”
Sara pointed at the stallion. “If you think that’s cool, you should see what my new horse can do.” If I ever get to ride him, that is.
“You mean Jerden’s horse?”
Sara bit back a retort. She couldn’t very well fault Karsyn for thinking that. The fact that it was becoming truer with each passing day didn’t help. “Actually, he’s my horse, and he can do all kinds of neat tricks.”
If I can figure out how to get him to do them.
Sara had been boning up on her classical dressage ever since she’d purchased Danuban, but the “airs above the ground” were movements she’d never attempted. Akira could do a decent levade, but that was about the size of it. Leaps like the courbette and capriole were beyond her expertise. Jerden, on the other hand, could probably do it—bareback and naked—and make it look easy.
“What else can this horse do?”
“Well, he can trot in place,” Sara replied. “It’s called the piaffe.”
“Show me!”
Akira responded promptly to Sara’s cue, even with Karsyn wiggling around on him.
“Very bouncy!”
Sara laughed. “He’s got nothing on you when it comes to bouncing, Karsyn. You’re the champ.” She glanced up just as Bonnie and Jerden came out onto the porch. Even knowing he was there didn’t fully prepare her for the sight of him—though he was wearing his loincloth. Apparently he was saving his new clothes for when he went to town. Still, the loincloth suited him, making him look like some kind of primitive warrior. A tingle ran up her spine.
“Look at us, Jerden!” Karsyn yelled. “We’re doing the—” She twisted around to face Sara again. “What’s it called?”
“The piaffe. If you do it moving forward, it’s called the passage. Like this.” Akira stepped out, his springy passage giving Sara the same thrill it always did. “He can go backwards, too.” While Karsyn dissolved into giggles, Sara backed Akira across the yard, coming to a halt by the porch.
“Mom! You gotta try this!” She clambered off the horse and into Bonnie’s arms. “It’s so much fun!”
“I’m sure it is,” Bonnie said. “Maybe one of these days I’ll take lessons.”
“Maybe I should too,” Jerden said.
Sara nearly swallowed her tongue. “I don’t know if you need lessons, Jerden. You already ride better than I do.”
“Not really,” he said. “I don’t know how to do any of that stuff.”
“In your case, I think it’s more a matter of not knowing these movements are possible. I’ll bet all you’d have to do is think about what you want a horse to do, and your body would automatically know how to cue it.”
Bonnie elbowed Jerden in the ribs and giggled. “Sort of like how you are with women.”
Sara frowned. “Huh?”
“Never mind,” Bonnie said. “You’ll get it someday.”
“I can give you lessons if you like,” Sara went on. “I’d like to see what Danuban can do, and it doesn’t look like I’m ever going to get to ride him myself.” As soon as the words were out of her mouth, she wished them unspoken. “Sorry, Jerden. That didn’t sound very nice.”
“It’s true, though,” he acknowledged. “I’m sorry to keep hogging him, but right now, aside from my feet, he’s my only means of transportation.”
“We’ve got to get you a speeder,” Bonnie said firmly. “Believe me, I know what it’s like to live out here without one. My feet had blisters on top of blisters back when I had to walk to the market in Nimbaza every week. Lynx can help you find one, and if it isn’t running, he can fix it.”
Karsyn nodded vigorously, her silvery blonde curls swaying with the movement. “Yeah. Daddy can fix anything.”
“Anything with moving parts and an engine, that is,” Bonnie amended. She smiled fondly. “He’s good at a lot of things.”
Sara was pretty sure she wasn’t only referring to his ability to keep the farm machinery running, but that was a tangent she chose to ignore. “Until you get a speeder, I can take you into town anytime you need a ride.”
Jerden grinned, displaying his fangs. “And until I get my own horse, I can ride yours?”
“Well, yeah,” Sara said lamely. So much for the occasional date to keep everyone guessing. “We might even get you into a horse show. It’d be great advertising for the farm. Ulla’s ready for training level. I bet you and Danuban could mop up the competition in first level, maybe even the second if you’re a quick study.”
“What about the stuff you were just doing?”
“Fourth level,” Sara said with a flick of her brow. “I know Danuban can do all of that—and more. It’s a matter of you learning how to ride it. Dressage is nothing like hopping on a horse and galloping off into the sunset. It’s very precise and difficult. But if you can compete at that level… well, that would be… awesome.”
***
The sparkle in Sara’s eyes went straight to Jerden’s heart. If riding well enough to win was what would make her think he was awesome, he was willing to give it a shot—aside from the fact that taking lessons from Sara would allow him to spend as much time at her place as he liked. He could come over for a lesson every day. “Guess I ought to get a pair of boots.”
“You’ll need more than that,” Ulla said as she came out onto the porch. “Boots, breeches, spurs… Really cool stuff.”
“She’s been bitten by the horse bug, Bonnie,” Sara said with a knowing smile. “You’ll never have any credits to spare again.”
Bonnie rolled her eyes. “Don’t I know it! Lynx is already building a stable for the ponies when they arrive. Feeding them won’t be a problem, but all the stuff a rider needs… well, you know what I’m talking about.”
Jerden caught himself before laughing out loud. The way he’d been riding, he didn’t need anything. But that was about to change. He would miss the freedom, though. Maybe he could strip down and ride naked through the mountains sometime when Sara wasn’t watching. Or maybe he would do it when she was watching. Jerden wasn’t ignorant when it came to the things women liked, and he knew very well that the sight of a naked hunk riding a horse like Danuban was enough to make even the toughest woman melt.
Except the one who aroused feelings in him he’d never felt before. Sara was more than a passing fancy. He liked her—even when she was telling him to get lost. And if he ever caught Nate sniffing around her again, well… he probably wouldn’t be quite as forgiving as he’d been the last time. Unfortunately, he wasn’t sure she liked him very much, though he suspected her dislike didn’t involve him specifically, but men in general. He had a feeling he was going to recover his sexual ability long before he caught the first whiff of her desire.
If he ever did. Someone had gotten to her, had destroyed any of the warmer feelings for the opposite sex that she might once have had. He wanted to take her in his arms and kiss away those fears. Unfortunately, if her reaction to Nate’s kiss was anything to go by, he had a long way to go before he could ever hope to get that close to her—at least, not in private.
Sara nodded at Ulla. “Speaking of horses, would you and Karsyn mind looking after Akira while I talk to your mother?”
Ulla didn’t bother to hide her enthusiasm. “I’d love to.”
As Sara dismounted and handed the reins to Ulla, Bonnie gave her daughter an indulgent smile. “I’m sure you would.”
“I want to ride by myself,” Karsyn said.
“You aren’t quite ready for that,” Sara replied. “You can sit on him, but let Ulla lead him. Okay?”
Karsyn stuck out her lower lip in protest, but she nodded. “I want Jerden to put me on him.”
Bless her heart, she gave him the best excuse for sticking around he could think of. He h
eld out his arms and caught Karsyn as she leaped toward him. “I’ll keep an eye on them.”
“Thanks.” Bonnie sounded grateful, but Sara’s expression never changed.
“Where are the other kids?” Sara asked.
“Out working with Lynx,” Bonnie replied. “Probably hindering more than helping. My two horse-crazy girls weren’t about to leave the house when they heard you’d be riding over here.” She glanced at Jerden. “And especially after you showed up on a black stallion.”
Jerden had visited Bonnie more out of curiosity than anything, and though he would’ve preferred to tell Bonnie the truth about his relationship with Sara, she’d seemed so pleased to see them together, he hated to disappoint her. On the other hand, the fact that she’d been no harder to convince than Salan made him slightly suspicious. Bonnie was a lot smarter than the dairymaid, and she and Sara were good friends. Sara would probably tell her everything—including whether or not she was having second thoughts about their arrangement.
She’d been very quiet during the trip home from Nimbaza, and Jerden hadn’t dared to break that silence to suggest that their temporary liaison might eventually become permanent. She probably assumed that once Nate stopped bothering her—perhaps even marrying someone else—she would have no further need of him. Jerden would do whatever it took to eliminate that possibility. A few days ago, she hadn’t liked him any more than she liked Nate. But that was changing. She’d at least agreed to be friends.
He’d used the excuse of inviting the Dackelovs to his party to get a better idea of how successful their performance had been, intending to stop in to see Sara on the way home to report what he’d discovered.
This was even better. Sara probably wouldn’t stay long, and he had no intention of leaving before she did. He would make the most of the opportunity to ride home with her. He smiled to himself. Sara was either going to get really sick of him hanging around or get used to him. And once she got used to him, she might even decide she liked him. If he was really lucky, she might even fall in love with him.
Even so, he’d love to be a fly on the wall to hear what she had to say to Bonnie.
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