Denise chuckled. “You don’t smoke, I take it?”
Lie. Lie. Lie. Matilda’s snob tips were like mantras circulating in the recesses of my mind. “I just prefer menthols.”
Danielle raised an eyebrow. “Are you going to the party at Lovers Playground Friday?”
I shook my head, feeling dizzy from the smoke. “No, I have a date.”
“Really?” Denise laughed. “With Wayne?”
“No. My boyfriend is coming home from college for the weekend.”
“Whatever.” Denise curled up her nose at me.
I snarled right back at her. “What do you care what my weekend plans are?” I left the bathroom, not bothering to wait for her reply. It didn’t seem like a very friendly encounter, but I already knew Matilda would note it as a success. Snobby girls were weird like that.
Second period was a little sigh of relief. We were still watching movies, due to the lab theft. Mrs. Roth turned down the lights, so I didn’t have to worry about anyone looking at me cross-eyed. The documentary we were watching today wasn’t as outdated as the one about the atomic bomb. It was over the recent research done on Mars. I really wanted to pay attention. I wanted to enjoy it. I loved space science, but I was entirely too distracted.
By third period, I had finally come to terms with my new look. If I was going to be stuck with the zombie Matilda makeover, that didn’t mean I had to let it get to me. If I could just forget about the makeup and the clothes long enough, then maybe I could get my head to start working right again.
I sat up straighter in history class and tried to pay attention, though not too much attention, since Mitch Brown was watching. Matilda said I didn’t have to let my grades fail, but that I did need to stop raising my hand so often.
Five minutes into class, Mitch asked to borrow a pencil. Mitch Brown asked me to borrow a pencil. Last week, he would have asked anyone but me. I kept Matilda in mind and tried not to make a big deal out of it, handing my spare pencil over without even looking at him.
Ten minutes later, when Mr. Charles had his back to the class, Mitch flipped a little folded note onto my desk. I raised an eyebrow at him and rolled my eyes, but I went ahead and opened it.
Hey Janie. You should come to the party at Lovers Playground Friday. Everyone’s going to be there. My cousin is in college, and he’s twenty-one. He’s buying alcohol for us. I could place an order for you, if you want? Just let me know what you’d like by Thursday. Hope you can make it! –M
Well, that solved the question of who was providing the booze. If only Officer Russell knew how to apply mascara like Matilda Hunt, maybe his investigation would have been more successful.
I thought about hanging on to the note to show Matilda or to frame as some sort of evidence that I had graduated from my lame nerd status, but I knew I had to give it back. It would give Mitch too much too soon. He would think I was saving it to build a shrine to him in my closet or something. Instead, I scribbled a quick note at the bottom.
I have a date Friday night, but thanks anyways. Maybe next time. –J
I waited for Mr. Charles to turn his back again and tossed it on Mitch’s desk. I didn’t watch his reaction, even though I really wanted to. I imagine watching a jock get all disappointed over me would have been entertaining. I was struggling to maintain my bored aura as it was though, so I refrained.
My nerves spiked again as lunchtime drew near. Sitting with Eddie definitely didn’t seem like something Matilda would have approved of, but Wayne’s presence seemed to counterbalance the nerd status of our table.
Eddie’s face as he watched me approach made me want to crawl under the table and die. His eyes went all alien, and his mouth gaped open, exposing a bite of half-chewed tuna sandwich. Wayne’s expression wasn’t much better. He blushed and looked away, scratching a hand over his short hair.
“Hey.... Janie,” Eddie said, like he had momentarily forgotten my name. I gave him a tight smile as I sat down.
“Hey,” Wayne said softly. His eyes dropped down to his lunch tray. I wasn’t quite sure what to make of his reaction. It almost seemed as if he was sad about something. Maybe I’d ask him about it after lunch on the way to algebra, as long as Eddie didn’t tag along.
I looked down at my cup of yogurt and milk. It wasn’t a lot, but my nerves made it hard for me to stomach much. I hadn’t found time to pack a lunch this morning, and Matilda had said that only nerds brought a bagged lunch anyway. I sighed and opened the yogurt. It was the cheap regular kind, not the creamy Greek yogurt my mom bought at the health food store. I almost choked on the first bite when Mitch plopped down at our table.
He slugged Wayne on the back and leaned in close to whisper to him without being overheard by the lunch ladies. “Dude, party at the playground Friday. You got a special beverage request?”
Wayne glanced back at me and shook his head violently. “I can’t. Still grounded.”
Mitch chuckled softly. “Like that’s ever stopped you from sneaking out before? I can pick you up around ten, if you need a ride.” He glanced over the table at me. “You two are neighbors, right? If you decide to cancel your date, I could give you a ride too, Janie.”
Wayne and Eddie’s heads snapped up at the same time. “Date?” they asked simultaneously.
Mitch jumped and looked back and forth between them with a nervous laugh. He gave me a little nod before leaving me alone with Wayne and Eddie’s questioning stares.
“What?” I barked at them.
Wayne looked away again. His ears turned pink, and his cheeks puffed out. I almost couldn’t stand it. I wanted to tell him it was a lie. I wanted to tell him that he was the only boy I’d ever wanted to go on a date with, that he was the only boy I’d ever kissed. I wanted to come clean so badly, but it would have to wait. Right now, my entire life depended on the façade that Matilda was forcing me to maintain.
“Who are you going on a date with?” Eddie was used to being awkward and weird. He didn’t have the same pride issues as Wayne.
“None of your business.” I frowned at him and put the lid back on my cup of yogurt. My stomach was doing cartwheels. I had to get out of there. I stood and left the table, but before I had gotten very far, I heard Eddie whisper over to Wayne, “What’s gotten into her?”
I threw away the yogurt, saving the milk to take up to the art room with me. I wasn’t really ready to see Chloe again, but I couldn’t handle sitting across from Wayne and Eddie any longer either. At least part of my discomfort had to do with the fact that I was now fully, painfully aware that not only did Wayne like me, but so did Eddie. I had a nagging little feeling that that had been true even before the Matilda makeover. I’d had my suspicions about Eddie, but I’d never really given it much thought before the jealous slip he and Wayne had just shared. I wasn’t really sure how I felt about it.
Eddie was attractive and interesting. He didn’t care what everyone else thought was cool or lame. He didn’t care what everyone thought of him. He was also bat crap crazy. Sometimes I couldn’t tell if he actually believed half the crazy stuff he rambled on about or not. Still, he was genuinely kind and entertaining.
Wayne, on the other hand, was more of a nostalgic heartthrob for me. We had grown up together. We had learned how to tie our shoes on the same day, and we had played house in our backyards for years before I realized that I wanted to do more than pretend with him. We had grown apart through high school, due to his desire to be cool, and I could only blame it on Matilda for so long before having to accept that no one had forced Wayne to date her. He had wanted to. When that notion really sunk in, I realized that Chloe had been at least a little right. Part of me was wearing Matilda’s trampy makeup because I wanted to impress Wayne.
I stopped at the art room door and took a deep breath before going in. Some foreign pop song blared from the radio on the windowsill. Chloe had her back to me. She was painting on a new canvas, but I couldn’t tell what it was since she was blocking my view. Her brush strokes were spor
adic and angry. I cleared my throat to catch her attention.
Chloe glanced over her shoulder and frowned at me. “I’m not talking to you until you wash that crap off your face.”
“Excuse me?” The olive branch I had planned on extending suddenly went up in flames.
“You heard me. You look like one of the Ds. It’s freaking me out. For real.” Chloe kept her back to me and continued painting while I fumed.
“There’s a good reason why I look this way.”
“Oh, yeah? Well let’s hear it.”
I folded my arms. “I can’t tell you, but I promise it’s necessary.”
Chloe finally turned around. “That’s weak. I’m your best friend, and you can’t tell me why you’ve made yourself up to look like a hooker? Would it happen to be the same reason I had to hear about your Friday night date from the Ds?”
“I do not look like a hooker.”
Chloe snorted. “Were you even planning on telling me about your date? I mean, this would be your first one ever. Why wouldn’t you tell me about that? Or did you just make it up, like your face?”
“Would you lay off about the makeup?”
Chloe raised an eyebrow. “You won’t wash it off. You can’t tell me what this necessary excuse is, and you keep avoiding the date questions. Fine. Then I can’t talk to you.” She turned back to her painting.
“That went well,” I grumbled to myself as I left the art room.
The bell for fifth period rang. Normally, I would have gone straight to algebra, but since I shared that class with Danielle, I had to wait for her to arrive first. I thought about hanging out in the bathroom, but I didn’t want to risk the Ds offering me a cigarette again.
I made it back downstairs just as the tail end of the lunch crowd scattered from the cafeteria. I slipped back inside amongst the abandoned tables and opened the carton of milk I was still carrying around with me. I sipped at it slowly, watching the clock over the exit.
The cafeteria was completely empty. Even the lunch ladies were gone. They must have slipped outside for a cigarette break now that the lunch rush was over. The smell of pizza and overcooked green beans hung in the air. The mostly deflated Lancelot swayed in the draft created by the sudden evacuation. He turned slowly to point his droopy lance at me, as if to say, “I see you. I see through your skanky disguise, and I dub you lady of eternal geekery.” I huffed at his imagined slight and heaved my half-full milk at him.
A door slammed somewhere in the kitchen behind the serving area, and I jumped. I hurried back out of the cafeteria before I got caught acting like a crazy. That was Eddie’s job.
Changes
Chapter 13
I had really thought that Matilda’s makeover work was finished, but by Wednesday morning, she had talked me into letting her do my hair. Of course, I had insisted that she wear a pair of the latex gloves that my mom used when she dyed her grays. Something told me that zombie flesh wouldn’t make for a trendy new hair accessory.
“That pout looks good on you. Keep practicing,” Matilda said as she looped another lock of hair around the curling iron.
I hadn’t realized I’d been scowling blankly in the mirror. Chloe hadn’t bothered to call me Tuesday night, and she didn’t answer when I tried her number after Matilda snuck out to the shed. I had tried to call Wayne too, but I couldn’t bring myself to punch in the last two digits of his number. What could I really say to him? I couldn’t tell him that I didn’t actually have a date and risk it getting back to the Ds, and I couldn’t give the lie anymore leverage by adding to it.
I still didn’t have a clue about how I was going to end Matilda once and for all. To make matters worse, the little nagging voice in the back of my head was starting to argue with my better judgment. It kept suggesting that I postpone the inevitable betrayal and wait until I’d learned all of Matilda’s tricks of the trade.
I couldn’t deny that a part of me was really enjoying the rush of being noticed by the Ds and Mitch. The little nagging voice presented a pretty solid argument too, considering the fact that if the betrayal failed, Matilda would most definitely see to it that I ended up in a padded room. I liked Wayne, but I just wasn’t sure if I was ready to take that kind of risk for him. After all, if Matilda hadn’t bit the dust, he’d still be her obedient little lapdog. He’d still be ignoring me and wouldn’t give a crap if I had a Friday night date or not.
Matilda finished styling my hair and snapped off the latex gloves. “There. That should do the trick.”
“This isn’t how you style your hair,” I said, sounding less impressed than I really was. My reddish-brown locks were shiny and smooth. Matilda had curled just the ends into layered spirals. Then she’d sectioned off the front of my hair into bangs and styled them at an angle over my right eye.
“No one likes a copycat,” she said with a grin. “The Ds will think you’re totally lame and pathetic if you try to copy my look entirely. You need just enough familiarity, topped with something fresh.”
I couldn’t get over how surprised I was by Matilda’s expertise. She wasn’t as brain dead as I had originally assumed, although most of her knowledge was about fashion and psychological manipulation. I was also surprised by how easily I was absorbing her little popularity lessons.
“I guess it’ll do,” I said, refusing to gush like a buffoon. I had to keep reminding myself that she was ruining my life... even if it sometimes seemed like she was improving it.
Matilda’s grin widened, exposing her stained teeth and blackened gums. “Shut your face. You know you look fabulous, J.” Her mood quickly crumbled when she caught her reflection in the mirror.
“I better go.” I stood up and grabbed my backpack.
“Oh, wait!” Matilda disappeared inside my closet and came back with tote bag. “You’ve got to get rid of that backpack.”
“What’s wrong with my backpack? And where did that come from?”
“I found it in the back of your closet. It had a robot or something on it, so I cut up some of your crappy clothes and glued the pieces on here in a funky pattern. I can be crafty when I want to be,” she said proudly.
I took the bag from her with a frown. “You cut up my clothes?” I noticed a few scraps from an old flannel shirt that I’d ruined during my bedroom makeover, and then there were pieces from a hideous sweater that my mom had bought me for Christmas years ago. I didn’t see any scraps from clothes that I would actually miss, and the bag did look kind of cool. No one else would have one like it. “You said the bag had a robot on it?”
“Yeah.” Matilda picked at the dirt caked in her nails. “I think there was a police box on the other side.”
I gasped. “You destroyed my Dr. Who bag?”
“Well, it wasn’t getting much use in the back of your closet, now was it?” Matilda laughed.
“That was a gift.” I ground my teeth together as I emptied my backpack into what used to be a token of mine and Chloe’s friendship. When I was finished, I threw the empty backpack at Matilda and left without saying goodbye.
My mom talked more than usual on the way to school. I think it was to make up for my brooding.
“Your father and I are going out Friday night to Cleopatra’s, that fancy new Egyptian restaurant that just opened. Did you want to come with us?”
I shook my head. “I was thinking about going to the movies with Chloe,” I lied. It was happening more and more. “If you’re going to be with Dad, do you think I could borrow the car?”
“Oh, okay. What movie are you girls going to see?”
“I dunno. There’s some cheesy romantic comedy that Chloe swears is epic. We’ll probably go to the late show, since we’re getting pizza first.”
“The late show?” Her brow creased, and she tugged at one of her pearl earrings.
“Yeah, so I might be a little late getting home. I think it’s a long one.”
“Well, just remember your key. Unless you’d like me to wait up for you?”
“That�
�s okay. I’ll take my key.”
The weather came on the radio and announced the first major snow prediction of the year, set to arrive Sunday evening. Snowflakes sprinkled over the windshield, but not so many that the wipers were needed. The flakes melted as soon as they landed.
I tightened the green scarf Matilda had picked out around my neck and tucked my hands in the pockets of my jean jacket as my mom pulled up in front of the school. She turned to face me with a weak smile.
“Your hair looks pretty like that,” she said, reaching over to pat my leg like she had done every morning since sixth grade, after I finally admitted that kids were making fun of me for hugging her goodbye.
“Thanks,” I said, trying to return her smile.
I didn’t see Chloe when I joined the other students in front of the cafeteria, but I did spot Danielle. She made a beeline for me, and I had to fight to keep my eyeballs from falling out of my head.
“Denise is sick today,” she said, running a hand through her blond hair. “Probably mono. You wanna smoke?”
My stomach knotted, but I shrugged anyway. “Yeah, alright.”
We walked past the cafeteria and in through the side entrance. The hall was empty, though I could hear the hum of chatter as the breakfast crowd prepared for the first bell. Danielle and I tiptoed past the teacher’s lounge and into the girls’ restroom.
“I prefer menthols too,” Danielle said, producing a blue box of cigarettes. I cringed, wondering if I was going to regret my earlier lie. When she passed the cigarette to me, I was only mildly relieved. It was still gross, but it had a minty undertone that helped mask some of the bitterness.
This time when I exhaled, I let out a long sigh, letting the smoke suck away some of my anger and anxiety over the ruined Dr. Who bag and the cluster of craptastic lies I was juggling. Danielle watched me with a satisfied smile, like she was finally deciding that I was cool enough to be seen with.
Crazy Ex-Ghoulfriend Page 8