So, as I’m flitting through the people, I spot two of my underlings talking to a couple of fine-looking ladies. My boys both have quite a few years of experience in the job, and I really wouldn’t want to mess with them if I were some Joe Blow.
Douglas has a massive red beard, and when I say massive, I really mean it goes down past his sternum. He is barrel chested, however just a smidge taller than me at five foot ten. If you were to think of anything when you look at Douglas, think life-sized, axe-wielding, berserker dwarf and almost as ugly. However, he does look rather respectable in the collar and vest.
Due to the massive amount of hair, his nickname for the past seventeen years we’ve known each other has been Fuzzy. Puts a whole new meaning to the saying ‘I feel all warm and fuzzy inside’. Am I right? Now you’ll always remember an angry, red-bearded dwarf grinning at you with a glint in his eye whenever you hear that saying. Just thought I’d share, as I know I do, and I shudder every time.
Fuzzy happens to be our tank in-game named Kazzrak. If there were an option to be a dwarf, he would be one.
Blake, the other guard, is very similar, but very different at the same time. Same height and build but with his clean-shaven face, he has an almost boyish prettiness but with bigger arms. I mean, like, what the fuck? Does the guy bench cars all day? Chuck a couple of bricks together as biceps and he’ll still be bigger.
As much as I hate to say it, he’s more of the sit back, relax and enjoy the view kind of guard. I’m still ironing out some kinks, and if there’s drama, he’ll jump right in. But for the most part he just likes to chill. He also happens to like to chill in fire as Dosan in the game, much to the vein popping of Ifalna’s temple.
And this is why he’s paired up with Fuzzy. I have a couple of rules in the clubbing game for my boys. If I pair you up, you walk together, you talk together, and you piss together. Separate, and if I catch you, I play the ninja game and you get a nipple cripple.
They are forewarned and, yes, I’m an asshole in that respect. But I’m the asshole in charge and am tasked with keeping everyone safe. Out of all the guards I’ve trained over the years versus others, at least mine have great reflexes, visual awareness and have each other’s backs.
There’s a lot of shit out there who only look out for themselves, or just start pounding away at some random dweeb for bumping into them. Poor fellas. Their mommies didn’t teach them any better, I suppose, or they probably had shitty bosses. The clubs I’m boss at have the physical evictions reduced dramatically after I get started.
Well, both the girls and my guards seem to be doing a fine job of preening themselves in front of each other as I sneak up behind them. Easiest way to sneak around is to portray to everyone else that you have every right to be there. Confidence, not arrogance, is amazingly key here and with pretty much every other part of security.
So is keeping out of the line of sight of the people you are sneaking up on. That helps.
So here I am, just lounging on a table with my elbow, sipping my drink and watching the crowd and my underlings flirting. Eventually they finally get their numbers and the girls move on to the bar. I roll my eyes as they fist-bump each other and grin. Deciding that there is no time like the present, I sidle up behind them, reach around quickly and give them a firm nipple cripple.
Ah, the joys of being boss, I think to myself as they rub their now sore nips before I say, “Now, now, boys, you both should know better. Even if you are chatting up some birds, which, by the way, that blonde is stunning and glad you got her digits, don’t forget to keep up awareness of your surroundings. How many times do I need to sneak up on you for you to get it, eh? You’re lucky it’s me tagging you and not some random asshole.”
Fuzzy smirks while Blake looks guiltily at me before sighing in defeat and accepting it. Blake grimaces and asks, “So, do I still need to give you five gold for each tag, or does it get revoked ’cause the new expansion is being released tomorrow night?”
Blake is referring to the running challenge I have going with my staff and the manager, that if I tag them with a nipple cripple, they have to pay me five gold, but if they tag me, they get five hundred gold. It’s not an amazingly high amount of in-game currency, as we’ve all been playing together for years and have quite a decent amount at any given time. But it’s nothing to sniff at, and the tags can certainly add up if I’m feeling like some quick cash in-game.
Grinning at Blake, I shake my head. “Sorry, buddy, a deal’s a deal. Cough it up before the update or I’ll charge it to you after the update when we all start back at level 1 and have to redo everything. I know I personally will want all the gold I can get my hands on after the update. Choose wisely.”
I wink at them before walking away and going about my job for the rest of the night. Pretty normal night, really. People are carded on the way in and refused if they have had too much or are too much of a dick at the door.
They buy booze, smash it down and go back for more, all while they are talking, dancing and having a good time. The occasional idiot tries to smoke in the wrong area, or goes into the wrong toilet with someone they shouldn’t, doing things they shouldn’t.
Generally, they all have a good time till they either leave or do something more stupid that involves violent physical interaction, which in turn involves being manhandled out the door. It’s been a good night, however, and I haven’t had to do any manhandling except for that fella at the start sobering up in the drunk tank.
The last person finally leaves and we close up shop. We go through the venue, looking for people squirrelled away in nooks and crannies either getting it on or waiting till we all leave before trying their hand at getting some quick cash.
Noobs, both sorts, I tell ya.
We all head down to the basement and sign off on the books. I’m the only one who has to do paperwork, fortunately, meaning it was a pretty good night for everyone.
Fuzzy puts the sign-off book down and asks everyone, “So, who’s up for one final foray into the bottom of the lager stein at Venatores before all our hard work gets scrapped?”
Fuzzy is referring to the guild hall the five of us bought a few years ago, which is a bit different than the normal guild halls. The main difference is that ours is a massive inn. Pub on the ground floor, living quarters upstairs.
While we are part of a guild called the Hunters, we mostly just do our own thing and only get together with the rest of them for the really big raids. The guild leader was quite happy when we forked out the gold to buy this place for everyone. He even partially reimbursed us with some of the funds of selling off the original, tiny guild hall.
Whatever we don’t keep in our inventories is kept at the bank in either our personal account or the guild account, so there is no need to have a vault like other guilds have. Also lessens the risk of being robbed by a high-level thief.
We spent some gold to employ some NPCs, non-playable-characters, which are controlled by a very limited AI, to be the bartenders, and they help spruce up the place.
“I’m game,” replies Anya, gathering her backpack and patting her flat, chiselled stomach. “Let me make some food and I’ll be right there. This body doesn’t run on empty.”
“Alright then,” I say, now finished with my report. “Let’s meet up at five in the morning and get the party started.”
We all walk down the corridor to the exit, and I knock on the manager’s office door on the way past. “Yo, Lockie! Piss-up in game. Last night celebrations, you in?”
There’s a muffled affirmative from behind the thick door and we carry on our way. Once we get outside, we go our separate ways to our vehicles. Everyone has cars or four-wheel drives today except for me.
When I get home, I lock the bike in the garage and start fixing myself some reheated dinner. After I wolf down the food, I take a quick dip in the shower to wash off the germs I picked up at the club, and head to bed. Rosie is already tucked up under the covers.
I know I’m probably going
to get the fourth degree when I wake up, but meh, I don’t like wasting my sleeping time, and I do like spending time gaming.
Slipping into bed with practised ease so I don’t wake her up, I put my phone on the wireless charging station that sends power to all electronic devices within a five-foot radius. Slipping the headgear on, I lie on my back in bed under the covers in a comfortable position.
The headgear is basically just a soft synthetic rubber headband that stretches a little and can be tightened or loosened if necessary. It’s actually quite comfortable to wear, and the versions that have come out in the last few years are now wireless instead of being corded, which is a major plus. People spent a lot of money just to have the wireless version.
I close my eyes and a floating button with ‘Log in’ appears in front of me, which I mentally click. The black floating colours of my closed eyelids turn into a soft grey and slowly brighten into my personal lobby before logging into the game itself.
2
My lobby is quite a large room with some sofas, a coffee table, and that’s about it. The detail is pretty good for the game. Think about a few recent movies that use just computer animation and that’s the quality I can see. It is a game, after all.
I never really went for the sprucing up of the lobby simply because I spend bugger all time in it. I’m either in the actual game or not in game, so I didn’t see the point of paying for all the visual extras that don’t do anything, especially because no one really comes into my lobby but me.
Thinking about the menu brings it up, and I choose the button called ‘Log in to DSR’ and my visuals go black. After a moment they lighten up and I see myself in my room at the guild inn. It’s very basic, a bed, table, chair and a couch in front of a fireplace. Not really that interesting. I get up from lying on my ass on the bed and stretch as I walk out of the room.
Stretching doesn’t do squat in-game, but old habits die hard, as the saying goes. Walking down the stairs, I pass a couple of NPC maids, and we nod at each other before they wander off to do whatever they do. Clean stuff, I guess.
Some people treated them poorly in the early days of the game after its release, thinking that they are just NPCs and it doesn’t matter what they do to them. They did some horrible things, but the AIs governing those NPCs sent specific codes to the game administrators, and the offenders were promptly disconnected from the game.
There’s a reason that people should read the warning instructions before playing the game. They clearly state that any physical or mental abuse of NPCs or players that contradict the safe environment established will be dealt with by an immediate and unsafe disconnection. Those people being terminated from the game received massive shock, mental trauma, nausea and other issues due to being disconnected unsafely.
The administrators could have easily disconnected them safely, but their internal law, which the user agrees to when creating their account, determines how severe the punishment will be. This ranges from just a disconnect and an hour ban, to a disconnect and an account ban.
If the account is banned, that person will never play the game or be able to log in again, due to the game already having a copy of their neural map. The police are also notified of the behaviour said individual displayed with high-definition recordings so they can be monitored in real life due to those tendencies.
It’s safe to say that there aren’t any more cases of that happening to NPCs or players. At least, none that make the headlines. Without realising it, the general population of all the billions of people who play the game have changed their behavioural patterns to be more civil in situations where they would have previously become upset. Crime rate went down dramatically across the globe, and that in itself is a powerful flag to world leaders.
As I get down to the ground floor, the noise and revelry of the guild, random players and NPCs who like to frequent our pub hits me in the face like a wet sock flung from an angry teenager. The bar itself we modelled off the 1920s American bar style, polished wooden and brass everything, with a scattering of tables and chairs on one side of the room and a massive stage and open area for dancing on the other.
Someone must have planned this earlier and I’d put my gold on Fuzzy. He is always one for the festivities, as long as he gets to drink some dark lager or honey mead. Looking around, I see that there have to be almost five hundred people in the room. I definitely need a drink or I’ll go all bouncer mode on them, so I make my way to the bar and order the usual from the bartender.
A suave-looking fellow in a three-piece tux pours me a pint of the sweetest pear cider that we stock, and sends it sliding down the bar top. The bar is so polished that it looks like the pint glass has wheels.
Taking a massive chug from my drink, I feel the nice crisp taste and the chilled liquid settling in my gut. I know this is all just brainwaves and neurons firing, but damn, does it taste good. The added bonus is that it only takes five drinks in this bar to get falling over hammered drunk, no matter who you are. My eyes wander over the rest of the place as a nice, tipsy feeling relaxes my mind.
There’s a seven-piece jazz band kicking up a foot-stomping tune on stage; at least 350 people are bopping away on the dance floor in various states of dress. Some have their raiding armour on, while others are using flashier kits, and others still in some of the more normal-looking attire. The rest are all lounging around the tables and the bar, living it up.
As I’m looking over the crowd, random people start having neon white feathers fall on them, and I chuckle at all the loud exclamations of unfairness. Looks like someone’s being a dick again and casting Cleanse on people who are happily smashed. Cleanse is a holy spell that cleanses all status ailments from the target. So whoever is casting it is making their targets have to go and get drunk all over again.
The worst part about it is that there is no visual clue as to who is casting the spell or where they are. All they have to do is check their battle logs and it will tell them who is healing them.
“Ifalna! Quit it!” I start hearing the semi-angry shouts from the people on the dance floor. Ah, of course, who else would it be?
“So, you finally made it, eh?” Ifalna’s voice says from my left. She’s leaning her back against the bar, elbows first, and smiling lopsidedly at me.
“Up to your old tricks again, I see, eh, Ifalna?” I smile up at her.
“What can I say, might as well get some fun going on while I still can. No idea what the new update is going to be like tomorrow.” She grins at me before winking. “Although I heard a rumour that an important pre-release document will be announced today at 06:00 game time.”
“Oh?” I look at the time at the top of my semitransparent heads-up display, or HUD. 05:50. Still a few minutes left or so. I look back at her. “So, where’s the rest of the boys at?”
“Ezekial is being wingman for Dosan over at the far tables while Kazzrak is plastered and Irish dancing at the front of the stage,” Ifalna replies, nodding to each direction.
“Well, I’m glad they are making the most of tonight, then,” I say with another sigh. Damn, I’m melancholy tonight, need another cider, I reckon. I chug back the rest of the cider and plop the glass on the bar, where another one is just being slid down the bar for me already. Damn smart AIs, that’s for sure.
I skull this one and a pleasant buzz fills my head, so I lean back against the bar like Ifalna and ask her, “So, what are your plans for after the update?”
She looks at me quizzically for a moment. “What do you mean?”
“Well, we are all starting off on level 1 again. No gear, no skills, no guild, nothing. From scratch. What are you planning on doing?” I explain, waving my empty pint glass around to punctuate each point.
“Oh, that’s easy. I’m going to kill shit and heal you guys. I don’t feel like learning how to play a completely new class when I’m already good at being a cleric. Plus, I know the ins and outs of this class so well, I just can’t help fucking with people.” To prove her p
oint, another couple of flashes of light rain down on the crowd.
A couple more exclamations of, “Fuck off, Ifalna!” can be heard above her laughter.
I chuckle along with her antics. “Well, I’m not sure what I want to do. We will probably just log in to the starting area like everyone else and fight over the very few mobs there are to kill and quest with. Ugh. What a pain.”
A System Administration message appears, taking up half my view, saying:
Greetings Adventurers!
We at DSR Corporation hope you have enjoyed your time in Dream Stream Reality, and we now invite you to join us in the sequel, DSR2. There are a few exciting and beneficial changes to what you know of the release so far, and they are as follows:
A: As a thank you from us, all currently logged-in players will receive the only achievement that will carry on to the new game. This achievement is titled ‘The Last Day’. Carriers of this achievement will be able to find out what this means in the new game.
B: 5,000 currently logged-in players throughout the world have been randomly selected and given a Beta Chest. Inside the chest is a single soul-bound Party Leader coin and four Party Member coins that will be soul bound to the first traded player. The Leader must select four players currently in game and trade them the Member coin before server shuts down or their Leader coin is nullified. The Beta Chest will appear in the lucky 5,000 inventories after the completion of this announcement. There will be many races available to the Beta players, although human will not be among them. Each race has a limit to the number of players who will be able to choose it, so choose quickly, lest the race you want is taken. Once you choose your race, you may spend an unrestricted amount of time choosing your classes. Beta testers must choose two classes, which will combine into a single class unique to Beta testers. Each coin is linked to a separate, new, undiscovered section of Orbis.
C: The world of Orbis now spans three times the size of Earth, so there are many uncharted areas. Upon completion of the Beta testing, these areas will become open to the rest of the players. Some of these players will be given the option of changing their race through personalised quests.
Dream Stream Reality: Publisher's Pack Books 1-2: (A LitRPG Adventure) Page 3