by Taylor Hart
They continued to stare at each other.
“Savannah,” he said eventually, “I … I’m so sorry about Sean.”
She bit her bottom lip and tears came to her eyes, just as he remembered her doing growing up when she was nervous or frustrated.
Taking a chance, he reached out to take her hand, but the tightness of her face told him not to touch her. He dropped his hand back to his side. His heart hammered inside his chest like a caged bird. There was a lump in his throat and his mouth was dry. “Can we go somewhere and talk? Please?”
Something in her eyes changed, and all the emotion evaporated. “Talk? You want to talk, Luke Freestone?” She barked out a laugh. “Actually, it doesn’t surprise me you want to hear yourself speak. You sure told Sean what you thought he should do with his life, didn’t you? Enlist. Become a soldier. And now he’s dead.”
Her words stabbed at his heart like cold metal.
“No, Luke, I don’t want to talk.” Eyes wild, she stomped away.
He went after her, unable to let her go. Ten years of this had left him desperate and wild and crazed himself. “Just listen!”
Spinning around, she slapped him—hard enough to rock him to his very core. “That’s for everything else.”
Not even reaching up to touch the pain on his cheek, he watched her walk toward the parking lot. More like stalk to the parking lot.
Once again, he found himself running after her. No. No. No. She didn’t get to do this. This time when he maneuvered in front of her, he wasn’t afraid of the gleaming hatred in her face. She stopped, and they were in a standoff again.
“I told him to enlist because he took you away from me.” The words sounded juvenile and stupid in his brain, but they were the truth. Exactly how he’d felt. How he still felt. “He took everything away from me.”
She glared at him, tears in her eyes. “Newsflash, you dumped me, remember?”
His heart pounded loud enough to drown out all reason, and he did something he’d never done before without asking her—he cupped her face in his hands and pressed his lips to hers.
At first she tensed, and when she tried to pull back, he slipped an arm around her midsection and held her to him. More forcefully, she pushed against his chest, but he held on, partly because he’d dreamed of doing this the last ten years and partly because he was angry.
Then he felt her give, and at once, it was passion and glory and the first time they’d kissed after the Sadie Hawkins dance a hundred years ago when they were seventeen. He was lost, completely unaware of anything or anyone except this moment.
When he let go, she pulled her hand back to slap him again, but this time he caught her hand in midair.
She looked confused and flushed and beautiful. “How dare you!”
The confusion on her face mirrored the confusion that had struck him like a lighting rod to the heart. Quickly, he flashed her a smile. The cocky, arrogant smile he used to cover any kind of uncertainty. “I figure if I take a slap, I may as well do something to deserve it.”
Fury raged into her eyes. “I hate you, Luke Freestone!” She rushed away from him.
Watching her go, he turned back to the marina muttering, “Fine, Mom, is that what you wanted? To show me I always mess it up?”
2
Savannah stared at her computer over a bowl of plain Cheerios. Her mother never bought sugar cereal, and even though Savannah had not been surprised, the food tasted like cardboard inside her mouth. She pushed the bowl away and promised herself she’d stop at Hazel’s for a cup of coffee. The feel of Luke Freestone had haunted her all night.
Yesterday, it’d been like some movie—having him show up in the middle of a guy manhandling her. To top it off, he looked good. Shirtless, he sure wasn’t the eighteen-year-old from the past; no, now he was a well-built man, his jaw more chiseled. His eyes were the same, though: aqua blue and piercing, like a Colorado glacier. His blond hair fell into his eyes, making him look like some male model.
Not to mention the nerve of him!
“Any new clients today?”
She jumped, but recovered quickly. “Morning.”
“Sheesh, someone’s jumpy.” Her father strolled into the kitchen, eyeing her computer. He perpetually lived in the seventies, complete with mustache, glasses, and long sideburns. The funny part about his appearance to Savannah was that his style was kind of back in style.
“Nope.” She stared at the marketing site for Park City and Salt Lake singles and wondered if she should place another ad. “I’m only here a few months. I don’t want to get involved in something that will take too long.”
Her father grinned. “You just want some simple matchmaking.”
“Exactly.”
His expression faltered. “I don’t think simple matchmaking exists anymore.”
Leaning back into her chair, she sighed. The whole premise of her matchmaking service was that it took the complicated out of it for people. After a couple of years of not being able to have children and Sean being gone all the time, she’d turned to matchmaking, loving the ability it gave her to help others have their own happily ever afters.
She hadn’t planned on doing any matchmaking for people in Park City, but she needed the money. The past year had been hard. It had been her sister Beth’s idea to take on a few clients in the greater Salt Lake City area since she would be here for the summer.
“Beth’s friend didn’t work out yesterday?” her father asked nonchalantly.
Savannah tried to become absorbed in her computer. She shrugged. “Not really.” She hadn’t explained to her parents what had happened yesterday. There was no point in bringing up Luke Freestone’s name to them. After what happened ten years ago, her mother still held a grudge. It didn’t help that she had dreamed about Luke all night, finally getting up at five and going for a run to try to pound the demons—or demon, singular—from her mind.
“What’s wrong?” her father asked as he pulled a kitchen chair back. It scraped against the new tile her mother had had installed a year ago when they’d remodeled the kitchen. It had been an unexpected change when she’d shown up last week. Then again, there had been a lot of changes in her life over the past year she didn’t get a lot of say in.
“Nothing,” she said quickly, taking inventory of her father’s gaze and knowing her only salvation would be in hiding from him. He’d always been good at reading her expression. She’d called an Uber car at the lake yesterday, then begged off dinner when she’d gotten home.
“Humph.” He poured his cheerios and milk. “You’ve been avoiding us since last night.”
“I was sick.”
He pushed a spoonful of cereal into his mouth and grunted. “You don’t seem to eat much lately.”
Her mother breezed into the kitchen, the picture of eloquence in a complementary seventies housewife style. Her hair was feather-curled like a Charlie’s Angel, and she wore a yellow summer dress with pearls and white ballerina shoes.
“Good morning,” she said in a singsongy voice, taking Postum out of the cupboard and warming up a mug of water in the microwave. “Richard, remember we have dinner tonight with the Charlestons. Savannah, I spoke with Darla this morning and she would love for you to come.”
The thought of sitting at a formal dinner with her parents’ friends, especially with the Charlestons, made her slightly nauseous. “Uh, I think Beth wanted to go out tonight.” Yes, using her sister as a cover was a good idea. Besides the fact Savannah would be chewing her sister out today for sending her out with the macho beast, Beth would cover for her she was sure.
“Really?” Her mother’s voice turned a bit nasally and half Murder She Wrote as she plucked her cup of water out of the microwave and spooned the Postum into it. “I thought Beth was working?”
Glancing at her mother, she saw the way her nose crinkled. Dang. She’d been caught. “Really? I thought it was tonight. I’m pretty sure it is.” She pulled up Beth’s message on her computer screen and type
d in, We’re going to dinner tonight, just so you know. Tell Mom.
“Hmm.” Her mother was stirring and clanking inside the mug.
They fell into comfortable silence and she listened to her father eating his Cheerios. For her whole life, Savannah had memories of sitting here in the kitchen, talking with her parents over breakfast. Her parents had been teachers; both of them were retired now, but both of them still reenacted this type of morning ritual every day. Even when she’d been on various Air Force bases, waiting for Sean to come back from classified missions to who knew where. When she thought of her parents, this is the scene she always thought about. The one she took the most comfort in. This normalcy.
She smiled to herself, even as she felt herself getting kind of weepy. They’d always supported her and been a rock for her over the last year.
“Don’t forget about Damon Freestone’s wedding this Friday,” her mother said, staring out the window to the backyard. “I wish his mother could have seen this day.” She flashed a grin to Savannah. “Did you know Damon and his fiancée are getting married in the Catholic Church? I think his mother would be so happy.” Her expression faded. “I wish one of my girls would marry in the church.”
“Cindy,” her father chastised.
Her mother winced and put a hand on her shoulder. “I meant Beth.”
Savannah kept her face guarded, but didn’t look at her, thinking how disappointed she’d been when she and Sean had come home from Las Vegas, already married. “Of course you did.”
“Honey, I’m sorry.”
Savannah let it go. Her mother would have to just continue to be disappointed.
“You will come to church this Sunday, won’t you?” her mother asked.
Savannah could only take so much playing of the good daughter. “You know I don’t go to church anymore.” She said quietly.
Her mother sighed and pulled her hand back, going back to her Postum. “Okay. It’s probably for the best, because Luke has started coming this past year, and I don’t like him.”
Savannah started at the mention of Luke’s name.
Her father glanced at her.
“What?” she asked too quickly.
He shook his head. “Nothing.”
“But you’ll come to Damon’s wedding, because that’s not really church, right?” her mother asked.
The pit of her stomach tweaked with annoyance. “No,” she said quickly.
“Why?” her mother asked, putting her cup down. “This is the first chance I’ve had to show you around again. The reception is at Luke’s house, but we’ll just have to avoid the host.”
“I’m not going to any of it.” The thought of Luke Freestone and the way his lips felt pressed against hers, the smell of aftershave and suntan lotion on his skin, had about undone her. She could not face him again.
Her dad gave her mom a sharp look. “Maybe you should tell her, Cindy.”
“What?” Her mother put her hands up innocently.
Lifting an eyebrow, her father shook his head and turned back to Savannah. “Sweetie, the reason your mother is pushing so hard is because your mother may have taken it upon herself to talk to one of the younger, unmarried teachers at the high school about you.”
“Mom, I don’t want that—”
Her mother put a hand into the air to stop her. “Listen. I know it’s been hard, but it’s been a year since Sean passed, sweetie. Clark is the sweetest guy. Plus, his wife passed away a year after they were married, and that’s been almost eight years ago. From all things I can tell, he’s kind, good, has dedicated his life to educating our youth … he’s a dreamboat.”
Now she was blushing not just from being annoyed, but also from embarrassment. “Ah, no, Mom, I’m not being set up.”
“Savannah!” Her mom threw a hand into the air. “Give this a chance.”
Her father let out a breath. “Cindy, let’s give it a rest.”
Savannah took her bowl to the sink and rinsed it out. “Do you want me to go, Dad?”
He paused, then shrugged. “He’s a nice kid.” Her father spoke of everyone younger than him as a kid. “And his wife died of lymphoma, so I feel for him.”
She thought of her father going to the hospital for treatments for his own cancer, her senior year in high school. They’d almost lost him, but he’d been in remission for eight years now. She softened.
“Our daughter, the matchmaker, never matches herself—what am I supposed to do?” Her mother sounded overly dramatic.
Savannah exhaled loudly and glanced back at her pouty expression. All softening halted. “Stay out of it, Mom, that’s what.”
“Sweetie?” Her dad’s low tenor voice was calming. “First of all, you know your mother can never stay out of anything.”
Savannah sighed.
“What’s wrong?” he asked.
Savannah wanted to turn on her heel and stalk from the room, but the way her dad asked it, and the way her parents had always been able to see through her, made her hand and lip quiver. “Nothing.”
“Savannah?” Her mother sounded a bit startled and she frowned. “Why did you avoid us last night?”
“I saw Luke,” she said, giving up hiding something she knew her mother would sniff out of her.
“What? Where?” Her mother’s eyes whipped around, as if Luke would pop out.
“I’m not eighteen anymore.” Even though she felt caught, she’d never told her mom the whole truth about Luke. She felt guilty about it, but she hadn’t.
“Where?” her mother demanded again.
All Savannah could think of was that horrible summer and how she’d been so depressed. Sean had finally been the one to get her out of her funk. “At the marina,” she confessed.
“What happened?” Her mother evaluated her like a sergeant.
“Nothing, we just ran into each other.” There would be no way she would tell her they kissed. No way.
Her mother’s hands clenched into fists. “Stay away from him, Savannah.”
Savannah held her mother’s eyes. “I will. Mom, it’s fine. I’m fine.”
Her mother sucked in a slow breath.
Savannah stood and took her mother’s hand, wanting to soothe her. “Hey, I was just thinking how you two have always been there for me through so much.” She thought of them coming out to the funeral at the base in Texas. Even with all the military uniforms and guns going off to give him a 21-gun salute, they had made her feel stable. They had grounded her. Beth had come, too. She and her mother had stood on either side of her. Honestly, their strength had allowed her to break down and face the reality of Sean being gone. She blinked back the emotion. “Thank you.”
Her mother lightly laid her hand over Savannah’s. “Honey, we love you. It’s good you’re back home.”
“Mom, I’m only visiting until the end of summer. I told you, I’m not staying here.”
Her mother shared a long look with her father, then put up her hands. “Fine, I’ll tell Clark it can only be a summer fling.” The side of her lip quirked.
The angst rushed out of her. Savannah smiled. “No, Mom. I’m not going on dates. I’m not going to the wedding this Friday. I’m just here to visit my family for the summer. Then I’m on to start a new life, okay?”
Her father reached out for her hand. “In California?”
“Yes.” This had always been her dream when she was young, to live in California.
Her mother tsked. “I let you watch too many re-runs of Beverly Hills 90210.” She sighed.
Beth frowned. “You’re being ridiculous, mom.”
Wagging her finger at Savannah, she insisted. “No, I’m not. I think you got it into your head things would be perfect in L.A. But I don’t think you realize life is just … life. It’s not perfect. It’s not a fairytale.”
Savannah frowned. “Mom, first of all, I don’t want to move to California because of 90210 and second of all, their lives were not perfect. It was drama television, Mom, not some fairytale.”
Her mother batted the air, clearly dismissing Savannah’s words. “You belong here, Savannah, with us. You always have. I know this past year you’ve been trying to figure things out, but coming home is always the right decision. You should stay here.”
“This isn’t my home, Mom.” Savannah’s words came out clipped. “It hasn’t been for a long time. I told all of you, I’m only here to visit. Then I’m a beach bum in California.”
Her father cleared his throat. “‘We shall not cease from exploration, and the end of all our exploring will be to arrive where we started and know the place for the first time.’ T. S. Eliot.”
It was typical of her English teacher father to quote things. She frowned. “I’m not in the mood for a quote, dad.”
Her mother went to his side, put one hand on his shoulder, and leaned into him, looking dreamy. “This is one of my favorite things about you, the way you do random quotes.” She kissed him softly.
He pulled her closer and drew the kiss out longer.
Glancing at Savannah, her mother pulled back, laughing. “Richard, not in front of the children.”
Savannah shook her head. She loved that her parents were still in love, but at the moment it annoyed her. “I never know what your quotes mean, dad.”
Her father let out a soft chuckle and kept her mother beside him, then turned to Savannah. “The quote means you will finally discover home isn’t ‘out there,’ it’s …” He put his hand on his chest. “‘In here.’”
“Hmm.” She wasn’t about to engage in this conversation any longer.
“Okay.” Her mom shook her head and then put on a relenting smile. “Okay, Richard, enough for today. How about we both take a couple of months with our daughter on whatever terms she wants.”
Surprised, but relieved, she nodded to her mother. “Thank you.” Yes, it would be good to have her parents respect her boundaries, and she had to manage the expectation. She would be leaving at the end of the summer.