The Apothecary's Daughter

by Betts, Charlotte

  There was a rushing in her ears and an explosion of happiness in her heart. She glanced over her shoulder at the blazing shop and the fire raging all around. She thought of her mother and her father and all the happy memories that she held. Those memories would live on, even if her home no longer existed. She looked into William’s dark eyes, slightly anxious now. A deep peace descended upon her.

  ‘I thought you’d never ask,’ she said.

  Chapter 31

  ‘William! My dearest William!’ Agnes’s voice cracked as she called his name. She pushed herself up out of her chair, her pipe tumbling to the floor as she reached for him.

  He ran and caught her frail body up in his arms, stroking the tears from her cheek with infinite tenderness. ‘You didn’t think I’d forgotten you, did you?’ He gently deposited her back in her chair.

  For once the old lady was speechless, her face working as she fought tears of joy.

  William drew up a chair and hugged her bony shoulders, while she clasped his hand as if she’d never let it go.

  Tactfully Susannah withdrew. She hurried to her bedchamber, where Phoebe walked the floor with a whimpering Beth in her arms.

  ‘She miss you,’ said Phoebe as Susannah gathered the babe into her arms and inhaled her milky scent. The events of the past few hours replayed themselves in her mind and the horror of what might have happened to Beth, if she hadn’t returned, finally hit home. She began to shake with the aftershock.

  ‘You find the doctor?’ Phoebe’s face was anxious.

  ‘Yes, yes I did,’ said Susannah through chattering teeth. ‘He’s well. But my father’s house has burned.’ She cried then and Phoebe rocked her until the storm had passed.

  At last, Susannah wiped her eyes and left Beth in Phoebe’s care while she went down to the kitchen.

  She was overjoyed to find Jennet sitting at the kitchen table regaling Mistress Oliver with the tale of her adventures.

  ‘But where were you, Jennet?’ Susannah asked.

  ‘The doctor sent me back here to let you know that he’d gone with the Duke of York’s men to fight the fire,’ said Jennet, ‘but on the way I found a lost child. By the time I’d chased her family out to Highgate Village and handed her back to her mother, two days had passed.’

  ‘And then you came all the way back here, towards the fire?’

  Jennet looked up at her with fear in her face. ‘I had nowhere else to go.’

  ‘There never was a more loyal servant,’ said Susannah. ‘And I cannot thank you enough for what you did for my father.’

  ‘I’ll speak to the missus,’ said Mistress Oliver. ‘I need a good kitchen maid to replace Peg. Assuming, of course, that the Captain’s House isn’t burned down and we still have a kitchen.’

  ‘The fire is coming closer,’ said Susannah, ‘and the wind still fans the flames towards us. If only the wind would change …’ She shuddered at the thought of losing two homes in one day. ‘I’ll take some food to Dr Ambrose and ask him what we should do.’

  She collected a tray of bread and bean soup and returned to Agnes’s bedchamber.

  Agnes had recovered her composure but still gripped William’s hand.

  ‘I thought you’d be hungry, William,’ Susannah said.

  He looked up at her with such love shining in his eyes that the world stood still for her.

  ‘Spoken like a good wife,’ he said.

  Agnes gave him a sharp look. ‘Oho! So that’s the way the wind blows, is it? Have you something to tell me, William?’

  ‘Can’t you guess?’ He smiled broadly, his delight plain for all to see. ‘And I’m not inclined to wait long before we tie the knot.’

  ‘So, you managed to catch him after all, miss,’ cackled Agnes. ‘I never thought you would but I’m very happy for you.’

  Susannah blushed; Agnes’s approval meant more to her than she had imagined. ‘And I believe you’ve met your match in this one, William,’ said Agnes.

  ‘I believe so too.’ He reached for Susannah’s hand. ‘And I’m looking forward to meeting the new addition to our family. I’ll have my hands full if the babe is half as spirited as her mother.’

  ‘You must eat first.’

  ‘It’s been days since I had more than a dry crust of bread.’ He suppressed a yawn. ‘I’m so hungry I could eat enough for an army.’ He fell on his soup with total concentration and Susannah and Agnes watched him indulgently until he wiped out the bowl with the last of the bread. He sighed and leaned back.

  ‘Now that you’re safely home and the doors are closed behind us, it’s easy to forget the fire is still raging out there,’ said Susannah, ‘except for the smoke in the air. Still, we’ve buried the silver in the old well, in case we have to escape in a hurry.’

  ‘I can’t do anything in a hurry these days,’ said Agnes, her voice thin and high with fear again.

  ‘There is the old handcart in one of the storerooms,’ said William. ‘We’ll make you up a comfortable bed and you will be transported as elegantly as a pasha.’

  ‘But where will we go?’

  William rubbed smuts from eyes red-rimmed with exhaustion, leaving a trail of soot across his cheek. ‘Westwards. Away from the fire. I’m sure Roger Somerford will find us temporary accommodation at Merryfields.’

  ‘If only the wind would change direction,’ said Agnes fretfully, ‘then we might be saved.’

  Susannah laid a hand on William’s arm. ‘You must rest. And you, too, Agnes, in case we have to leave in a hurry.’

  ‘I won’t have you out of my sight, Susannah,’ warned William, clasping her hand in his.

  ‘Then let us leave Agnes to rest. You can wash the soot away and I’ll dress those burns on your hands. We’ll go to the chapel; you can sleep there. I’ll watch out for the fire and wake you if necessary.’

  Before long, William was installed in Agnes’s favourite chair with a cushion behind his head and Susannah beside him. She placed a basin of warm water on the table and carefully washed his face and hands. His eyes were closed as she wiped the grime away and she marvelled at his long, black eyelashes. She smeared the angry red burns on his palms with a marigold salve of her own making before binding them in clean linen.

  As William’s face began to relax Susannah stroked his hair, studying him closely. His arm twitched once or twice and then he became loose-limbed and his breathing steadied into sleep. She was still shaky with relief at his escape and she hadn’t even asked him yet how he’d managed it. No matter; time for that later. She smiled to herself, the joy bubbling up inside her again. They had the whole of the rest of their lives together to talk. Gently, she leaned across and kissed his forehead.

  Stationing herself on the window seat, Susannah watched the smoke billowing over the rooftops as the fire edged its way ever closer. The area between Bridewell and Dorset House was aflame and, unless the wind turned towards the east, once Dorset House caught they would have to go. She drummed her fingers on the windowsill and wondered how late she dared to leave it be before she woke William.

  Two hours later there was a scratching at the door. Phoebe came in carrying Beth.

  Phoebe glanced at William. ‘She hungry,’ she whispered.

  Susannah took Beth from her and Phoebe closed the door carefully behind her. William still slept, so Susannah loosened her bodice to suckle the baby. She murmured sweet nothings to her while she fed, stroking her soft cheek with her finger.

  ‘That’s as pretty a picture as ever I’ve seen,’ said a sleepy voice.

  Susannah started and hastily adjusted her chemise. ‘Did we wake you?’

  William yawned, stood up and stretched. ‘That was the best sleep I’ve had for months. But now I’d like to meet your daughter.’ He held out his arms. ‘May I hold her?’

  Bursting with pride, Susannah held Beth out to him.

  He took her carefully and cradled her, rocking her gently as she screwed up her face ready to cry. ‘Hush, sweeting!’ He lifted her up so that her fac
e was on a level with his own and she looked back at him through narrowed eyes. Then she blew a milky bubble and the corner of her mouth lifted as if in a smile. William laughed. ‘So tiny and so perfect! Have you named her yet?’

  ‘Elizabeth, after my mother. But I shall call her Beth.’

  ‘Would you …’ His bit his lip. ‘Would you think it an imposition if I asked you to give her a second name? Since I shall be the only father she knows, I would dearly love to honour my own mother, too. Her name was Constance.’

  ‘Elizabeth Constance.’ Emotion made Susannah’s voice quaver. ‘It has a fine ring to it, don’t you think?’

  Beth began to fuss and William hoisted her onto his shoulder and walked about the room with her until she settled.

  ‘You have a way with babies, William.’

  ‘I always wanted children and thought that it was not to be.’ He hesitated and then said, ‘I don’t want there to be secrets between us, Susannah. And so I must tell you that, some years ago, I was married.’

  ‘Agnes told me about Caroline. And the baby she carried.’

  ‘Did she now?’ His eyes watched her face carefully. ‘Do you mind?’

  ‘Not now. I was tormented for a while by the thought that you’d never be able to love me for memories of her.’

  ‘I love you far more than I ever cared for Caroline. She was pretty but capricious. And untrustworthy. I was young then and not such a good judge of character as I am now.’

  ‘William?’

  ‘Yes, my love?’

  Her heart began to thud uncomfortably in her chest. ‘You are right; there must be no secrets between us and so I must ask for your forgiveness.’

  ‘For what?’

  She clasped her hands together to still their trembling; would the truth be too hard for William to forgive? ‘I ask your forgiveness for not trusting you.’ She saw a small frown begin to gather on his brow but it was too late to draw back. ‘I saw you with Phoebe that last night before Father was taken ill. You were coming out of her room. And I thought …’

  He became very still. ‘You thought I had betrayed you?’

  ‘I couldn’t believe it but I saw you. You were both barefoot and in your night clothes. But it was the way you touched Phoebe’s cheek with such tenderness that made me believe …’ She stopped at the sight of the hurt written on his face.

  ‘I’m wounded that you should believe such a thing of me, Susannah. Dammit, I’d told you that very evening that I loved you! Did you have no faith in me at all?’ He turned away from her and went to stare out of the window at the billowing smoke. ‘I never felt about Phoebe in that way. Why would I when I loved you?’

  ‘I know that now, William. Phoebe told me the truth of the matter.’

  ‘You should have known that without Phoebe telling you so!’

  ‘But at the time I believed that Joseph was your son …’

  ‘My son!’ He whirled round to face her again. ‘Good God, wherever did you get that impression?’

  ‘I overheard you talking to Agnes when we first brought Phoebe and Joseph home. I thought that you were telling Agnes that Joseph was your child. But now I know the truth of the matter.’

  ‘And all these months I’ve been trying to protect you from the knowledge that he’s Henry’s son!’

  ‘It doesn’t have the power to hurt me now. In fact,’ she gave him a hesitant little smile, ‘I was in raptures when Phoebe told me because it meant that Joseph wasn’t your child, as I believed.’

  ‘And yet you still loved me, supposing all the while that he was?’ She nodded. ‘Yes, but you can’t know the torments of jealousy I suffered over Phoebe.

  ‘In fact I do have an idea since my own imagination painted vivid pictures of you in Henry’s arms.’ He sighed. ‘Susannah, that night when I went to tend to poor little Joseph I felt sorry for Phoebe. She had loved Henry with all her heart and he’d gone. She was alone and frightened and all she had left was her son. He’d been so violently ill she’d thought he might die too.’

  ‘So, will you forgive me?’ she asked in a small voice.

  ‘Come here!’ He caught her to him and kissed her nose. ‘Your confession has answered one question for me.’

  ‘It has?’

  ‘I understood you were grieving for your father but I did wonder why you were often so disagreeable to me while I was in quarantine.’

  ‘I shall try to make it up to you,’ said Susannah.

  ‘I’m sure I can find a way,’ he said with a mischievous glint in his eye.

  She glanced out of the window at the sun, now beginning to drop in the smoky sky. ‘It’s going to be difficult to run from the fire with an old lady and a baby, all in the dark.’

  ‘And it will break Agnes’s heart if the Captain’s House burns. I hope we can wait until morning.’

  Susannah trembled as she again pictured the apothecary shop in flames and pushed the thought firmly away; the time for grieving over that would have to come later. Frowning, she said, ‘I meant to ask: what were you doing back in the shop? Jennet told me you’d left two days before to go with the Duke of York’s men to fight the fire.’

  ‘I did. But afterwards I returned to save your father’s journals and his books.’

  ‘His journals?’

  William gave a crooked smile. ‘The journals are filled with a lifetime of medical observations and his books saved my sanity while we were shut up. And I knew how important they were to you so I dug a deep hole in the yard and buried them, together with the great pestle and mortar. I don’t know if they’ll survive the heat but when the fire burns out we’ll go back and see.’

  Susannah embraced William and the sleeping baby he still cradled, her happiness bitter-sweet. ‘I wish my father had known that we are to be married.’

  ‘But he did, Susannah! I asked him for your hand before he died. He thought we would make a good match and gave us his blessing.’

  Susannah held up her face to be kissed, wishing her father was there to share her joy.

  ‘I’ve been making plans, oh, such plans, Susannah, but I must discuss them with you.’

  ‘What kind of plans?’ Curiosity made her forget her sadness for a moment.

  ‘I’ve had a great deal of time to think. I remembered what you said to me when I helped that poor dying boy in Bedlam. You said that, although it was only a drop in an ocean of sadness, my actions did make a difference to him. And I thought that if I can save even one tormented being and return him to good health, then I shall have achieved something worthwhile.’

  Susannah nodded.

  ‘And so I came to a decision but I need your approval. This is something not to be undertaken lightly because it would change the whole way we live.’

  ‘In what way?’

  ‘Next year my tenant, Roger Somerford, will leave Merryfields because he has inherited his father’s estate. So we will have the opportunity to live there again.’

  ‘At Merryfields?’ Susannah put her hands to her mouth. ‘Oh, William, now the apothecary shop has gone I can’t imagine anywhere else I’d rather be!’

  ‘Mmm.’ William scratched his head. ‘But you may not like my reasons for wanting to move there. I want to make Merryfields a place where the melancholic can come to rest and be made whole again.’

  ‘I don’t understand.’

  ‘Some time ago you reminded me of what my mother once said; that gardening heals the soul. And Merryfields has acres of gardens.

  We could take in guests, those who might otherwise have been thrown into Bedlam.’ He leaned forward, his voice eager. ‘Not the hopelessly mad but those who have been made heartbroken by loss or who suffer from some condition that doesn’t allow them to fit into society. We would provide a tranquil respite from the cares of the world and encourage these guests to work in the gardens, to allow them to feel the warm earth between their fingers and watch the new shoots grow in the springtime.’ His face was animated and his eyes sparkled.

  Susanna
h gazed at Beth’s sleeping face, so tenderly cupped in William’s hand, while she considered his plan. At last she said, ‘It’s an admirable idea but I would not wish to risk the safety of …’

  ‘Our children?’ William smiled at Susannah’s blush. ‘I agree. Of course, we would have to choose our guests very carefully. And then there is another idea I think you will like.’

  Susannah wondered if she could take in any more new thoughts after such a day of extraordinary events.

  William’s eyes blazed with triumph. ‘My best idea of all is this: you shall have your own apothecary.’

  ‘My own?’

  ‘At Merryfields we’ll need my skills as a physician but you will be at my side to help me and to dispense the medicines. And when the village hears of your apothecary the local people will come knocking on your door. I anticipate you’ll be kept very busy.’

  Susannah’s heart was thudding with excitement. How happy her father would have been for her!

  ‘So what do you think?’

  ‘Yes,’ she said. ‘Yes, yes, yes!’

  William whooped with delight, waking the baby.

  Susannah placed Beth on a nest of cushions and they stood watching her while she settled back into sleep.

  ‘I forgot to ask you,’ Susannah whispered. ‘How did you escape the fire?’

  ‘I took a leaf out of Arabella’s book,’ William said with a grin as he pulled her to him. ‘I scrambled out of the window and escaped over the rooftops with the flames licking at my heels!’

  Susannah laughed. ‘Perhaps the best thing to come out of the fire is that all Arabella’s vulgar Chinese furniture has burned.’

  The casement rattled in the wind as Susannah shut her eyes to escape the terrible thought of what might have been and then she felt William kiss her closed lids as gently as a butterfly’s wing. She wound her arms round his neck and his unshaven chin was rough against her face. The warmth and reassuring firmness of his torso pressed against her own, together with the male scent of him, made her quiver with a sudden shaft of desire.